I was watching an episode of home improvement where wilson dresses up like santa claus for the youngest one, but everybody else knew there wasnt a santa.

12/24/2005 1:51:10 AM

I read an article in the newspaper on when to tell your kids

12/24/2005 2:03:15 AM

I jsut figured that shit out when i was 4

12/24/2005 2:09:02 AM

before my parents told my brother and me they were getting divorced they were like "ok guys, you know the easter bunny and santa claus aren't real right?" not sure why they started with that approach.

12/24/2005 3:00:32 AM

some dickhead made a thread on TheWolfWeb called "How I learned there is no santa claus"

12/24/2005 3:03:12 AM

^aha

i couldn't figure out how the elves made my toys so perfectly like the ones i saw in toy stores.
made absolutely no sense to me
you know, the elves are there to make the toys for santa, but i would get a barbie in the box and everything
i battled with that until i was about 6

12/24/2005 3:46:32 AM

i read this thread on tww

12/24/2005 4:51:40 AM

My parents never said he was real, so I found out early.

12/24/2005 8:23:39 AM

Being the first child of Indian parents, I was never fed the Santa bullshit, so I never believed any of it. My parents are devout Catholics, so my perception of Christmas was having to go to church more often than the rest of the year. By the time my younger sister was born, mom and dad had a little more American cultural savvy, and gave her the whole Santa thing. The one benefit of this was that I started getting free shit on Christmas day. However, already knowing that Santa was fake, and much to the disappointment (ok, maybe unbridled rage is a better word) of every parent in my second grade class, I was that kid who ruined Santa for everyone else around me.

I have no regrets about that

12/24/2005 8:57:19 AM

ahahahahahahaha




My Dad pretty much told me when I was 7. He puts a present under the tree and says "DON'T GO MESSING WITH THAT." Of course I did, and my suspicions that Santa wasn't real were confirmed.

12/24/2005 9:05:27 AM

i'm gonna tell my kids santa claus is just the way people try to make you think someone is watching you and will reward you if you're good and to just smile and nod when they talk about him

kinda like jesus

oh and how I figured it out was that at my house santa put the gifts out in the open on christmas eve while I was asleep, but he wrapped my cousins' gifts and put labels on them that said "from santa."

Obviously my parents and my aunt didn't coordinate their lies very well

[Edited on December 24, 2005 at 9:39 AM. Reason : .]

12/24/2005 9:37:43 AM

i found out in like the 4th grade when i heard my mom on the phone asking my dad if he got stuff to put in our Xmas stockings

12/24/2005 12:35:16 PM

a girl in my third grade class told me at the lunch table...

my brother's story is a LOT worse...
his first grade teacher was sick the week before Christmas, and the substitute teacher told the entire class Santa wasn't real

12/24/2005 12:43:35 PM

When I was 6, someone from my family that I didn't know dressed up as Mr. & Mrs. Santa Claus. So I believed for a few more years. Then suddenly, the tags that said To: Bethany From: Santa looked just like my Dad's writing. So I figured it out then. I also figured out the Easter Bunny because I thought someone would have shot a Bunny that big. But one Easter before that, I left out carrots and a note for the Easter Bunny and asked for his signature. My Dad somehow made a bunny print on the paper so perfectly that I believed a few more years.

But all my suspicions were just confirmed... You guys suck!

[Edited on December 24, 2005 at 12:45 PM. Reason : m]

12/24/2005 12:44:39 PM

I actually figured it out pretty early just becuase the whole idea seemed...bizzare and nonsensical. But, I didnt say anything untill my brother who is 4 years my younger, figured it out.
I was afraid if i said anything I wouldnt get the gifts anymore!

12/24/2005 12:44:42 PM

I basically had the same stance on Santa as I did on God, which was that it didn't seem right to me but if I believed it I'd get presents so I did.

12/24/2005 1:31:35 PM

presents under the tree were always from parents...the ones sitting out when we woke up was from santa. but i figured out when i was like 6 or 7 and i had written santa a note telling him that the cookies and milk were for him, but there was punch in the dining room that he could have as well. he wrote back! but man his handwriting looked a lot like mom's

now that note is a christmas tree ornament

12/24/2005 1:34:58 PM

my mom used to drive a station wagon with a hidden third seat compartment, and one day when she picked me up from school, I climbed into the back to get in and when i opened it I saw 2 blue sleds. On Christmas morning the blue sleds were marked from santa, so I called the cops and told them that santa was stealing from my mom, and the dispatcher told me there was no santa

12/24/2005 2:13:56 PM

There's no Santa when you're poor. There was barely even a Christmas for that matter.

12/24/2005 2:58:06 PM

no, it's just that santa hates poor people.

12/24/2005 3:01:19 PM

Quote :

"I also figured out the Easter Bunny because I thought someone would have shot a Bunny that big. "

haha fucking redneck

12/24/2005 3:01:40 PM

I hide on the stairs one night and watched mom and dad set up the stuff before they went to bed. I told mom and them I figured it out but I played along for another couple years b/c of the younger sister. we still do the santa thing but we know it's mom and dad. they just like to put santa on the tag

12/24/2005 3:29:23 PM

my sister is 9 and still believes

it kinda makes Christmas more fun cuz the rest of us have to pretend

12/24/2005 3:30:20 PM

9 is too hold. you should tell her now.

12/24/2005 3:33:04 PM

yeah this year my cousins have kids old enough to believe in santa and understand it so I have to act like I'm going to bed early tonight so they'll want to go to bed early as well

12/24/2005 3:33:41 PM

I figured it out when I was about 6 or 7. I just thought how it was totally not possible for a dude on a sled to get around the entire world in one night. Plus, carrying every kid's presents. The news people on TV that track him were always way to fast for me. The time table just didn't make sense. Plus half the time, different news stations would say he was in different places at the same time. I played along for a while after that because my parents told me that if I ever stopped believing in Santa, then I wouldn't get as many gifts.

12/24/2005 6:04:02 PM

I found my dollhouse from santa in the laundry room.

12/24/2005 6:07:03 PM

I can't remember when i had my suspicions but I decided to test them out one year by telling my parents of a toy I didn’t really want and then I wrote a secret note to Santa and hid it on top of the mantel peiece of the fireplace. I figured if Santa was real I shouldn’t have to tell my parents what I want and they would find my note. When I didn’t get the toy I wanted, I still wasn’t sure so I told my parents and I don’t think I ever got it. They claimed it was because Santa didn’t know. The next year, I decided to hunt and find where my parents hid the gifts and I was able to find them in the old shed that was behind our house. That same year my parents had to take a toy back to Toys-R-Us for some reason but I prided myself for my detetive work afterwards. Because I was the oldest of three though, I continued to play along for my siblings.

12/24/2005 6:18:50 PM

I figured before this episode occurred...

But one time my dad went on a diet and suspiciously he told me Santa requested skim milk and low fat devil's food cookies (dad's fav) that year so he could fit down our chimney...

And I always asked why the fire burned on CEve and how Santa didn't catch on fire. He should burn.

Then I wondered how he got into houses without chimneys.....hmmmm...And houses with alarm systems...I was advanced.

12/24/2005 8:36:20 PM

Quote :

"Then I wondered how he got into houses without chimneys.....hmmmm...And houses with alarm systems...I was advanced."

Dude... Santa totally h4x.

12/24/2005 9:23:43 PM

i still believe



but honestly, i was probably around 12 when i found out it was my parents. whichever year Wayne's World came out on VHS for the first time. saw it in my mom's trunk. didn't really change a thing for me.

instead of santa being a big fat guy who comes into my house, he was a spirit of giving and celebration around christmas. not that much of a stretch.

but man i'm gonna feel so sorry for some of your kids.

12/25/2005 12:22:21 AM

I was the only one who believed in my private baptist school kindergarden class and I argued the point until I asked my mom as we were pulling into the driveway after getting picked up from school.

12/28/2005 2:16:10 AM

I got a gift from Santa I didn't want, and my mom went and pulled out the receipt and we took it back

kinda spoils it for you

12/28/2005 10:47:28 AM

my uncles swap every year to dress up as Santa. I come from a large Asian family.

12/28/2005 10:51:31 AM

my parents never told me he wasnt real

12/28/2005 11:08:30 AM

I'm Jewish, I kinda knew from the start...

Nonetheless, I let my entire preschool (or was it kindergarten?) class know on a pumpkin patch. That was one helluva conversation starter

(I don't remember doing this, but my Mom tells me that she chaperoned and essentially had to run over and cover my mouth before the entire class started to cry...and, like a good mother, she patched everything up. From that point on, I knew to *never* reveal the true nature of Santa Claus to all of my gentile friends).

[Edited on December 28, 2005 at 11:18 AM. Reason : .]

12/28/2005 11:17:31 AM

I had a friend who believed until he was 12. I remember when he first started talking about Santa at eleven years old I honestly thought he was kidding.

12/28/2005 11:31:32 AM

My lil bro is turning 12 next month and on Christmas Eve he kept saying "Move the grate off of the fireplace so Santa can come down." and the like. My mom even sticks mine and my older siblings presents under the tree with From Santa written on them. Either he is more gullable then we thought or he is pulling our legs back.

12/28/2005 11:56:45 AM

I asked my mother flat out, so she figured OK tell him the truth.
I ran cying out of the room and was whacked out for about three days after that!

This was only last week BTW

12/28/2005 12:36:42 PM

I was 7 and kind of stopped believing, I asked for Snake Mountain and didn't get it, that was the one thing I really wanted, so I kinda of knew then. Then that Easter I figured out that the Easter Bunny was my parents so I put two and two together and figured it out. But to this day I still get loot from "Santa"

12/28/2005 12:37:39 PM

my stepmother told my sister

just another reason my mom dislikes my stepmother

12/28/2005 12:43:34 PM

my parents never really tried to get either of the two of us to believe in santa. damn hippies; i guess the principle of not lying to your kids stopped them. I learned about santa from kids and teachers at school and by that time it had no more weight than your average little kid story.

12/28/2005 2:17:41 PM

I honestly don't remember
my memory sucks though
so i guess it wasn't too traumatic of an experience

12/28/2005 2:26:06 PM

1st grade

teacher passed out a worksheet where you had to determine if the numbered statements were based on reality or on fantasy (R or F). one of the statements read something like: "The elves help Santa make toys in his workshop."

i put down an R; it was marked wrong.

12/28/2005 2:28:47 PM

Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, etc. all had the same handwriting as my mom.

And I caught my mom putting money under my pillow. I thought she was trying to steal my tooth fairy money

12/28/2005 2:30:46 PM

hahah... you trusted the tooth fairy more than your mom

12/28/2005 3:03:44 PM

i sure as shit didnt notice any handwriting correlation

how could you kids be so smart and end up so dumb

12/28/2005 3:15:19 PM

christmas eve i counted the number of Oreos in the cookie jar, then i left 5 cookies and milk for santa. Dad didnt like oreos but everyone else in the world that i knew did. christmas day the glass was empty and the cookies were gone but when i counted the jar again the 5 i took out were back in it. I was 5. And then ofcourse told my sister who was 3.

12/29/2005 8:47:20 AM

Quote :

"i'm gonna tell my kids santa claus is just the way people try to make you think someone is watching you and will reward you if you're good and to just smile and nod when they talk about him"

40 years from now we're going to be reading about the "Cult of Santa Claus"...

12/29/2005 8:59:56 AM

Talking to some German co-workers a couple weeks ago, I found out that in Germany (and other parts of Europe i think) they don't have Santa. They have St. Nicholas who vists on December 6, but then on Christmas Eve, "The Christ Child", i.e. Baby Jesus (i'll call him BJ for short), delivers presents. Apparently they leave a window open and BJ floats in or something and leaves presents...... I find that quite creepy.
But I asked if they have a whole mythology system built up around Baby Jesus, like we do with Santa with the reindeer and sleigh and elves and all that. Then of course I realized oh yeah, Christianity is the myhology system built around BJ - of course, when German children reach a certain age I don't think the parents sit them down and have "the talk" where they explain that Baby Jesus doesn't exist.
The whole thing sounds like a recipie for disaster to me

Quote :

"christmas eve i counted the number of Oreos in the cookie jar,"

haha - we did that too. I think we (my brother and I) counted carrots in the refridgerator because we always left those out for the reindeer. But as I recall we told our parents about our little experiment, so I don't think it worked out too well.....

[Edited on December 29, 2005 at 9:53 AM. Reason : .]

12/29/2005 9:51:51 AM