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 Message Boards » » this is why i love craigslist. Page [1] 2 3 4 5 ... 52, Next  
evan
All American
27701 Posts
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http://raleigh.craigslist.org/roo/387414550.html

Quote :
"FREE RENT to attractive female roommate
Reply to: hous-387414550@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-02, 1:48AM EDT


Hi. I'm a 27 year old guy with a nicely-furnished, clean one-bedroom apartment with fireplace. I'm a laid-back, honest, educated, intelligent, and attractive guy. I recently got out of LTR relationship, and I find myself lonely. I don't have the time or energy to go through the whole dating thing right now, but I'm also not the type of guy who just goes out and has random, casual sex. So here's the deal:

After you respond to this ad, we can correspond to see if we might have a good fit. After that, we meet in person to see if we click. If so, you can move in to my apartment whenever you're ready. You can stay at my place completely rent free. There are no expectations, although if you could cook once in a while, that would be a definitely plus. I mainly just want some company and some affection at night. If our arrangement leads to sex and a relationship, I'm open to that possibility, but it's not expected.

I am a non-smoker, and I would prefer that you are also. I am also D/D free, and you should be also.

Please send a pic, and I'll send one in response. I look forward to hearing from you."

8/2/2007 2:36:26 PM

Oeuvre
All American
6651 Posts
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what's LTR?

8/2/2007 2:37:49 PM

Jen
All American
10527 Posts
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he sould have just said "btw... Im bout the size of a baby walrus"

8/2/2007 2:38:55 PM

evan
All American
27701 Posts
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long term relationship

8/2/2007 2:38:57 PM

jocristian
All American
7503 Posts
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long term relationship?

8/2/2007 2:39:03 PM

DiamondAce
Suspended
12937 Posts
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long term relationship

8/2/2007 2:39:07 PM

terpball
All American
22489 Posts
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long term

he's being being redundant

8/2/2007 2:39:17 PM

Oeuvre
All American
6651 Posts
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mommy how did you meet daddy?


Well, I'm a whore for free rent. His fat ass posts on a website that he'll give someone free rent for sex.

You know that 1/100000 chance that someone gets pregnant on birth control? Yeah, that's you.

8/2/2007 2:40:19 PM

wizzkidd
All American
1668 Posts
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long term relationship?

8/2/2007 3:05:35 PM

Jen
All American
10527 Posts
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http://raleigh.craigslist.org/cas/387315905.html

Quote :
"hay im 19 m cd looking for a guy 30-60s for some fun maby a regular thing sorry cant host"


he lives at home, his parents must be thrilled

8/2/2007 3:25:18 PM

gunzz
IS NÚMERO UNO
68205 Posts
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is that a penis

8/2/2007 3:26:38 PM

cddweller
All American
20699 Posts
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Shouldn't showing your dick defeat the purpose of being a crossdresser?

8/2/2007 3:33:18 PM

abbradsh
All American
2418 Posts
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he probably stole his moms panties

8/2/2007 3:38:12 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
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Quote :
"I am also D/D free, and you should be also.
"



pfft

im only looking for D/D POSITIVE NGZ to mooch off of

8/2/2007 3:41:11 PM

BrookeRuff
Meredith "Angel"
7595 Posts
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what does D/D mean? Drugs and what?

8/2/2007 3:42:05 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
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disease.


POZ'S PLZ

8/2/2007 3:42:31 PM

BrookeRuff
Meredith "Angel"
7595 Posts
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ahhhh.... I'm not wise to all the craigslist dating lingo. thanks.

8/2/2007 3:43:40 PM

Skack
All American
31140 Posts
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Quote :
"I recently got out of LTR relationship, "


Lord of the Rings relationship. Living in a fantasy world must be nice.

8/2/2007 3:51:50 PM

wwwebsurfer
All American
10216 Posts
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I need a freaking translator to read that ad... how can 'educated & intelligent' even apply to this idiot?

8/2/2007 5:45:26 PM

El Nachó
special helper
16370 Posts
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what do you find so hard to understand about it?

8/2/2007 5:47:33 PM

Gozo
All American
10337 Posts
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This guys a winn4r

Quote :
"Are you pregnant? - 30

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-387715042@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-02, 1:49PM EDT


I can't father my own children and my ex couldn't handle that fact. We thought about adopting, but we wanted the full experience. But it just wasn't ment to be, so we split.

I still want the full experience, so I am looking for a girl who is recently pregnant from a father who either doesn't know and/or doesn't want to be involved so I can step in act as the father from even before birth and hopefully through thier whole life."

8/2/2007 6:40:11 PM

3 of 11
All American
6276 Posts
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The sun is set. The stars shine in the sky. The night air is tinged with anticipation. And it is time to meet The Continental.

8/2/2007 6:49:20 PM

chembob
Yankee Cowboy
27011 Posts
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The view from here is intoxicating

8/2/2007 6:55:38 PM

mdozer73
All American
8005 Posts
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lmao

...if you can get through all of it

You are a mature male, over 50 yrs.
Happily unmarried and not hiding a "lawfully wedded wife"
in your family skeleton closet while advertisng for erotic/ amorous/ romantic
rendevous on Craigs List.

I am a multi-talented accomplished musician, artist, composer, song writer,
dancer and Tantra . ... . Priestess of the Sensual, Erotic . . . Scorpio Arts.
My natal horescope is a double scorpio. Scorpio is THE . . Sex-Love Sign in
the mythic horescope/Zodiac of our ancestural . . . . Astrology/Astronomy and
Anatomical . . . mapping of the whole cosmos in relation to the human psyche/
soul-dimension of the . . . . . unconscious, subconscious . . . Mind of Humankind.

You appreciate boldly intelligent, male ego challenting mature "older women"
who are skillful BS detectors (belief systems detectors) and like vultures,
can smell old moldly dead meat (brain dead narcistic egotism and chauvanism)
20 miles away . by remote . . . . . extra sensory perception.

You find my obvious intelligence an erotic turn on and aphrodesiac. You are
quite capable of matching wits with me, playfully teasing my inner . . ..
secret . . . . flesh and ego veiled . . . . . . essence to come out and play
with your . . . . secret . . . . . . flesh and ego masked narcistic . . .
falsefaced . . . . . more than human . . . . Being.

We love mystery and intrigue, all things esoteric and occult, hidden from the
less ambitious . . .. . "masses" of humankind.

We have been longing for this dejavu karmic rendevou for lifetimes and we
both know that we our tantric reunion . . . draweth nigh. Others do not
understand the depth of our perceptive . . . . piercing of the veil of Maya,
the great illusion of separation.

We are often misunderstood, our intelligence and depth of self-perception and
self-realization perceived as "intimidating" or "too deep" or "over the heads"
of those with less evolved . . . . . conscious self realization.

Our innate spiritual gifts, talents and acquired skills, crafty . . . .
creative ingenuity, fun loving, playfully free spirited spontaneity and
"coloring outside the lines, thinking outside the box, insatiable curiosity
and daring wllingness to push the envelop, explore the unexplored and the
unexplained . . . . . makes us a complementary instead of competitive . . .
potentiality . . . . . a grande possibility that awaits our mutual discovery.

You love my mytho-poetic love of all things beautiful each in its own way.
You love how I can see the beauty in what ignorant mortal humans call ugly,
how I can see the love in the cruelty, the hope in the despair, and the
unseen in the seen, how I can hear the unheard cry for love in all sentient being, regardless of how it is masked, veiled, denied and assimilated into the
one big LIE of mortal "humankind" . . the lie that divinity is separated from
humanity . . . . that immortality is separated from mortality . . . that
anything and/or everything is separated from the ONE inseparable source of all.

We love to dive together into the pool of consciousness for the pearl of
great price . . . . . to open the oyster shell of life and discover the hidden
pearl created by aeons of oceanic sand and grit . .. . that produced the
pearl inside the oyster shell. The magical transformation!

You love my spontaneous Scorpio/Love Goddess poetry that is spontaneous,
my "prefered language . . . set to my own music."

"Oh, my beloved, long have I longed for thee.
Long have I searched for thee, across continents and cultures lost in time
Long have I longed for your tantric embrace and our divine dance of Ecstasy
In crowded cities have I searched, and lonely quiet little townes,
In my solitude have I searched and longed for our soul rapturing tantric reunion
And . . . . found you . . . . illusively . . . . hauntingly . .a mere illusion
of what? A madwoman, a neurotic bitch, whore, witch . . . burned on the
pyres of the witch crazed . . . megamaniacal . . . . . historic . burning times?

Lesser men have courted my heart and a few have I invited to taste the
divine elixirs and nectars of the Goddess . . while reserving the ultimate
taste . . .. . for you, beloved that we may intoxicatingly sip, and drink
deeply together from the same . . . . cistern, the same well, the same
Holy Grail . . . .

Who are you reading these feeble words, so limited and so mundane and unworthy
of such inner fire of burning divine desire? Approach me not with mundane
familiarity. My Yoni-YOUniqueness seeks He that is worthy to taste the
sweet intoxicating wine . . . . . . that is all I am, in essence, spirit on fire!

Scorpio Intrique . . . seeking Intriguing Tantric Consort for Tantric . .
Rendevous . somewhere in time and . . . where no time is.

http://raleigh.craigslist.org/w4m/391275182.html

8/7/2007 6:48:20 PM

ThePeter
TWW CHAMPION
37709 Posts
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^didn't get through it

8/7/2007 6:53:40 PM

mdozer73
All American
8005 Posts
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ill sum it up

she need to get a cat, rather than looking on w4m

8/7/2007 6:54:29 PM

Amsterdam718
All American
15134 Posts
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Quote :
"This guys a winn4r

Quote :
"Are you pregnant? - 30

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-387715042@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-02, 1:49PM EDT


I can't father my own children and my ex couldn't handle that fact. We thought about adopting, but we wanted the full experience. But it just wasn't ment to be, so we split.

I still want the full experience, so I am looking for a girl who is recently pregnant from a father who either doesn't know and/or doesn't want to be involved so I can step in act as the father from even before birth and hopefully through thier whole life.""




POOR EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING HERE. someone email this guy how much of a pussy he is.

8/7/2007 7:24:26 PM

Amsterdam718
All American
15134 Posts
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8/7/2007 7:31:23 PM

Shivan Bird
Football time
11094 Posts
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Quote :
"I am looking for a girl who is recently pregnant from a father who either doesn't know and/or doesn't want to be involved"


I bet a thousand women are like "jackpot!"

8/7/2007 10:03:06 PM

cyrion
All American
27139 Posts
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http://madison.craigslist.org/bar/396736258.html

just cuz it is funny that ppl have to put these types of comments in a babysitting ad.

[Edited on August 15, 2007 at 10:07 PM. Reason : ooo a 32" used 1080i HD CRT. only 650, the cost of a new decent 32" lcd. what a steal]

8/15/2007 10:00:23 PM

MyCarSucks
All American
5600 Posts
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i got a feelin that that dudes arrangement will not work out the way he hopes

that niggas gonna get robbed

8/15/2007 11:04:11 PM

jchill2
All American
2683 Posts
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^^I think it was literally a steal.

8/15/2007 11:07:43 PM

fjjackso
All American
14538 Posts
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Quote :
"CLEANING or MASSAGE ?? - 25
Reply to: pers-398336742@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-16, 8:54AM EDT


I LOVE TO CLEAN TOPLESS, YOU KNOW YOU WOULD LUV TO WATCH ME DUST, SWEEP AND CLEAN....BUT, DO YOU HAVE THE BALLS TO HIRE ME???? OR WILL YOU JUST WONDER WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO HAVE SOME ONE LIKE ME CLEANING UP YOUR MESS??? IT'S UP 2 YOU...BALLS ? OR NO BALLS??? AND NO $$$$$$ "


8/16/2007 11:30:51 AM

cyrion
All American
27139 Posts
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http://madison.craigslist.org/spo/400813781.html

8/19/2007 10:06:24 PM

cyrion
All American
27139 Posts
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Quote :
"Me and my friends were partying it up at the Great Dane and I got sick in the doorway, right on your shoes.
I was so embarrassed but you were so *SO* sweet about it.

If you're single, wanna meet?"



rants and raves is my new favorite section though. cl is great.

[Edited on August 23, 2007 at 10:56 PM. Reason : .]

8/23/2007 10:56:20 PM

raiden
All American
10504 Posts
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craigslist ftw

8/24/2007 9:04:50 AM

MsWuf
All American
3258 Posts
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i always check out missed connections ... weird, but almost every week it seems like i know someone one of them is referring to. never me though ... boo hoo.

8/24/2007 9:26:47 AM

raiden
All American
10504 Posts
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cool screenname MsWuf

8/24/2007 9:30:05 AM

GraniteBalls
Aging fast
12262 Posts
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^^ bwn?

8/24/2007 9:49:29 AM

MsWuf
All American
3258 Posts
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no ... perhaps that's the problem.

8/24/2007 10:33:51 AM

SymeGuy69
All American
11036 Posts
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27 yo virgin?

8/24/2007 10:40:26 AM

Amiblondee
All American
1521 Posts
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Quote :
"Looking for a Grandmother/Soccer Mom/Nanny - m4w - 20

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
----
Reply to: pers-405981756@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-25, 6:12PM EDT


Are you suffering from Empty-Nest Syndrome? Do you have a burning enthusiasm
for baking?

We are four 20-year old college roommates attending NCSU (Carolina fans need
not apply) and are looking for either a grandmotherly figure/soccer mom who
would like to spend possibly 2-3 hours a day at our apartment helping us to
keep our house in line with such activities as baking, cooking steaks,
knitting, cleaning, making orange slices, cutting the crust off of white
bread, attending our sporting events, and helping build moral fiber. We also
might need rides to and from various extracurricular activities, i.e.
soccer, from time to time.

Payment for services rendered will come in the form of lots of love, caring
devotion, hugs, macaroni necklaces, and other school art projects.

If you are looking for a way to make a positive impact on your community by
donating your time to helping some young sons of America make their way
through the University experience, or would like an activity to help keep
you busy, please inquire and let us know as soon as possible.

We look forward to starting a relationship with you!




Location: NCSU Area
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
interests

PostingID: 405981756"

8/25/2007 10:22:14 PM

Kiwi
All American
38546 Posts
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haha awesome

8/25/2007 10:24:25 PM

drunknloaded
Suspended
147487 Posts
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no offense to the people that do it, but i think looking at the personals of craigslist is for whores(men and women)

8/25/2007 10:25:52 PM

Amiblondee
All American
1521 Posts
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my mom must be a whore then, she totally emailed that to me.

8/25/2007 10:26:53 PM

iceplaya
All American
6661 Posts
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is she hot?

8/25/2007 10:27:14 PM

Mindstorm
All American
15858 Posts
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I think you also forgot about the entertainment factor. There are some seriously entertaining winners on there.

8/25/2007 10:27:21 PM

Amiblondee
All American
1521 Posts
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^^ um she looks like me only 50?

8/25/2007 10:28:15 PM

drunknloaded
Suspended
147487 Posts
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i just find the whole thing retarded

8/25/2007 10:29:05 PM

cyrion
All American
27139 Posts
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yeah, ive started reading it for the funny when tdub is down. seems all the fat women are looking for love and/or cock. every other post is "im 5'2, size 14, but i wear it well" or "ive got lots of beautiful curves." im pretty sure BeachedBalugaWhale. Fatties.

I also wonder how many of these "I need cock right now" in the casual encounters are actually dudes looking for an easy laugh. maybe theres just more sluts out there than i thought.

8/25/2007 10:30:02 PM

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