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djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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https://www.buyprocaulk.com/?s_kwcid=pro%20caulk|1801931959&gclid=CP2rlKKWkpgCFQZinAod8XYNmw

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 10:48 PM. Reason : a]

1/15/2009 10:46:02 PM

ReceiveDeath
INEED2 GET HIRITENOW
70263 Posts
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k

1/15/2009 10:46:24 PM

wwwebsurfer
All American
10217 Posts
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they've had these in Lowe's hardware for years. ~$5-6 too.

1/15/2009 10:46:48 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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is there a taste to the caulk?

1/15/2009 10:46:49 PM

LunaK
LOSER :(
23634 Posts
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high in protein apparently

1/15/2009 10:47:35 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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LET ME PUT MY CAULK IN YOUR CRACK

1/15/2009 10:48:08 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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lasts longer, harder, and smoother

1/15/2009 10:48:45 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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$20 for 3 little pieces of plastic

GENIUS

1/15/2009 10:49:07 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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except people dont buy that piece of shit...

genius fail

1/15/2009 10:50:49 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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wanna bet? i guarantee the dude that invented Pro Cock is a multi-millionaire

1/15/2009 10:52:19 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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[insert jump to conclusions mat]

1/15/2009 10:52:55 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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which is why i rack my brain almost every night to try to come up with the next useless invention that I can make millions off of via television infomercials.

1/15/2009 10:54:37 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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He made a million dollars!

1/15/2009 10:55:13 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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you followin me camera guy

1/15/2009 10:55:34 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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what a lot of smart inventors fail to do is KISS

because 95% of the population is the second S

and they'll buy it even if its shit


Now, thats not the most ethical way to go about trying to better the world, but then again we are talking about making money.

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 10:57 PM. Reason : d]

1/15/2009 10:56:12 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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they just showed the Slap Chop infomercial

Vince will no doubt sell whatever i come up with

1/15/2009 10:56:57 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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you need a conglomeration of a weight loss product and a cleaning product in one...swiffer with adjustable weights?

1/15/2009 10:57:24 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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Do you really want Vince? Wouldn't you rather have Billy Mays screaming at your potential customer?

1/15/2009 10:58:02 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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vince has got to be hitting the top of the infomercial salary charts

billy mays is fucked


[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 10:58 PM. Reason : oh man, a 7-second difference on the billy mays reference]

1/15/2009 10:58:09 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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how about a sock folder

you stick the two socks through the loop, pull, and viola, folded socks

1/15/2009 10:58:09 PM

tromboner950
All American
9667 Posts
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Quote :
"Vince will no doubt sell whatever i come up with"


Good business move. Despite his e-fame, he's probably one of the least expensive (but still recognizable) commercial spokesmen to hire. Somewhere in the middle ground, between washed-up semi-celebrities (Billy Mays) and amateur models.

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 10:59 PM. Reason : .]

1/15/2009 10:58:32 PM

TheBullDoza
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that's fucking dumb...how hard is it to fold socks...

FAIL

i should not be so negative. My bad, dustm



[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 10:59 PM. Reason : f]

1/15/2009 10:58:48 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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Quote :
"what a lot of smart inventors fail to do is KISS

because 95% of the population is the second S

and they'll buy it even if its shit"


you obviously see where I am coming from. seriously, I could take a shit in a box and sell it, as long as I made an infomercial

1/15/2009 10:59:23 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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^^ thats the whole point

how hard is it to chop vegetables, or use a regular dish cloth

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:03 PM. Reason : appology accepted fool]

1/15/2009 10:59:51 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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Quote :
"you stick the two socks through the loop, pull, and viola, folded socks"


TIRED OF SUPER STRETCHED OUT SOX?

TIRED OF HAVING TO LOOK FOR THE SECOND SOCK IN YOUR FAVORITE PAIR OF SOX?

WITH OUR NEW SOX LOXTM YOU CAN KEEP YOUR SOX TOGETHER WITHOUT STRETCHING OUT THE ELASTIC

See, when you ball your socks like this, you following me camera guy, you're stressing those bad boys

Stop wearing stressed socks

The Sox Lox is like therapy for your socks

This is your footwear's Dr Phil

GET THE SOX LOX

1/15/2009 11:00:39 PM

tromboner950
All American
9667 Posts
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It's crucial to remember, though, that most of those same "Second-S" people are also incredibly fucking lazy. You've got to provide them something that sounds worthy of getting off the couch and walking to a phone.

1/15/2009 11:00:58 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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that is the funny part about the slap chop. did you see how small you have to cut that shit up to get it to fit in there? if you are having to cut it that small to get it in your chopper, why not just keep going and chop the shit?

1/15/2009 11:01:27 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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you're not talking shit about the shamwow are you....you better not be...

LOL...woodfoot sold it well..



[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:02 PM. Reason : f]

1/15/2009 11:01:28 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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i feel the power of the TWW brainstorm

this is actually a somewhat legit sounding infomercial

1/15/2009 11:02:15 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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Why rack your brain trying to come up with inventions that solve non-existent problems? Just sell big dick pills.

1/15/2009 11:02:18 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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SOX LOX......Made in Taiwan, and you know the Taiwanese make good stuff

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:03 PM. Reason : a]

1/15/2009 11:03:16 PM

Woodfoot
All American
60354 Posts
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Quote :
"i feel the power of the TWW brainstorm

this is actually a somewhat legit sounding infomercial

"


make it happen

cut me a one-time royalty check

1/15/2009 11:03:39 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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LOLOLOL...true...how many users on TWW you think have ordered some....

1/15/2009 11:03:39 PM

tromboner950
All American
9667 Posts
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Quote :
"Why rack your brain trying to come up with inventions that solve non-existent problems? Just sell big dick pills."


BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE THE MONEY IS, SON.

BIG DICK PILLS HAVE BEEN DONE TO DEATH, ONLY METROS INVEST IN THAT SHIT NOW.

YOU GOT TO GET WITH THE MODERN TIMES, SON.

1/15/2009 11:04:03 PM

Woodfoot
All American
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more like

sell something that makes people think its good to have a small dick

you'd sell that shit by the boatload

1/15/2009 11:05:38 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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Can I play dumbshit consumer #1 in the "Tired of being embarrassed by saggy socks?" video clip right before you show your brilliant SoxLox solution? You know the guy, the one who can't cope with his tangled weed whacker trimmer line and desperately needs the weed weasel or whatever the fuck that was.

1/15/2009 11:06:06 PM

dustm
All American
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of course it would follow the typical infomercial format with a "limited time" doubled offer plus a companion product for free.

so yeah, we need a companion product. Does not have to be functionally related.


^my favorite was the wagner commercials with the guy covered in paint painting siding against the direction of the siding.

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:07 PM. Reason : ^haha]

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:07 PM. Reason : thread moving too fast for me]

1/15/2009 11:06:17 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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"Pocket [insert any tool/activity]"

1/15/2009 11:07:22 PM

tromboner950
All American
9667 Posts
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Quote :
"more like

sell something that makes people think its good to have a small dick

you'd sell that shit by the boatload"


At the risk of sounding cliche, I give you the master business plan:


Step 1: Market it in Japan

Step 2: ????

Step 3: PROFIT

1/15/2009 11:07:30 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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I want to put out a version of the weed weasel for black chicks that can't get their hair under control. It's called the Weave Weasel

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:08 PM. Reason : ']

1/15/2009 11:07:31 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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just add something to it....

a diet/big dick pill...that would work perfectly of our over weight user base

tired of being fat AND having a small dick?

Want ladies to fuck you?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions, then you need Big Dick Solja pills

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:09 PM. Reason : it could use some work]

1/15/2009 11:08:27 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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I'm going to bed. you guys let me know the idea and how much i need to invest.

1/15/2009 11:10:02 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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fat AND have a small dick? our product works in 3 ways

-Increases dick size
-decreases fat
-decreased fat makes the dick longer by the low-tide effect

1/15/2009 11:10:44 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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Dude, I'll whip up a batch of big dick pills tonight. Ain't nothing but pencil shavings and baking soda in a gelatin capsule.

1/15/2009 11:11:48 PM

cyrion
All American
27139 Posts
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FAT TRANSFERRED DIRECTLY TO DICK.

1/15/2009 11:12:33 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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of course it doesn't have to work because its just a dietary suppliment

so you have to word it carefully "we are so sure extenze will make you larger...'' yeah, larger, in bodilly volume, by one pill

1/15/2009 11:13:26 PM

Kurtis636
All American
14984 Posts
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"Our miracle product uses patented lipotransferezines to move your fat from where you want it least to where you need it most!"*






















*These claims have not been verified by the FDA. Big Dick Solja Pills are not intended to treat or cure any medical conditions or diseases.

1/15/2009 11:14:22 PM

TheBullDoza
All American
7117 Posts
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LOL...nice....



and we need different infomercials for different social classes...the poor

YO man...you tired of being poor, fat, and having a small dick?

youll always be poor, but at least you can be skinny and have a dick of bigness

order Big Dick Solja pills today and wash yo troubles away..YA HEARD

[Edited on January 15, 2009 at 11:16 PM. Reason : f]

1/15/2009 11:15:10 PM

Tiberius
Suspended
7607 Posts
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Quote :
"BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE THE MONEY IS, SON.

BIG DICK PILLS HAVE BEEN DONE TO DEATH, ONLY METROS INVEST IN THAT SHIT NOW.

YOU GOT TO GET WITH THE MODERN TIMES, SON."


LOL @ trombonerTurbo

1/15/2009 11:15:43 PM

dustm
All American
14296 Posts
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we can dress djeternal up like a doctor and have him say some shit, then have vince come in with his bit and drive it home

1/15/2009 11:15:45 PM

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