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 Message Boards » » TWW Parents: simple Q&A/info sharing thread Page 1 ... 16 17 18 19 [20], Prev  
ssclark
Black and Proud
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awesome!! we're planning on breastfeeding as much as possible, but honestly neither of us are quite familiar with what all goes into it obviously im not going to be making any breastfeeding demands as the dude.

8/25/2016 10:12:09 PM

DonMega
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My wife tried breastfeeding, but her nips got pretty raw and she wanted me to do more feedings, so everything was pumped and bottle fed.

bottle every 3 hours means at least 8 bottles a day. We usually had around 5 bottles in the fridge filled with breast milk that were ready to be used. We ran the dishwasher nightly, and it was bottle after bottle after bottle. We did the bags, and different size bottles, and bottles from friends whose kids are too big for bottles, so we had a huge hodgepodge of bottles. More the merrier. I know that we bought more and more especially after we were making 8oz bottles and the little ones couldn't be used any more.

Unless you kid is getting it directly from the source most of the time, you'll need more bottles than 4. But Target is not that far away, so getting more bottles is not a big concern right now.

8/26/2016 8:45:17 AM

Darb5000
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If you're going to be bottle feeding as well, I recommend getting a good bottle drying rack and the baskets to put the bottle parts in the dishwasher. Whatever brand bottle you're using, buy their own baskets instead of the universal ones. Might be a couple of bucks more up front but the parts fit better than the generic baskets and will get cleaner.

We used these:

http://www.target.com/p/munchkin-high-capacity-bottle-drying-rack/-/A-13955647

http://www.buybuybaby.com/store/product/dr-brown-39-s-natural-flow-reg-standard-bottle-dishwasher-basket/1015030828?Keyword=bottle+basket

8/26/2016 10:50:47 AM

darkone
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Reposting for this page

Legally Paying your Nanny
This is a very terse guide. I'll answer questions.

To get set up
You need a Federal and State Tax ID.
You're a household employer which carries special rules
Register with Social Security BSO
Register with NCDHHS
Register with NC DoR
Register with NC Department of Employment Security

To Hire
New nanny has to fill out W4, NC4, and I9.
Report the new hire to NC DHHS

All of our nannies were hired via care.com. Quality of applicants will vary widely and you won't know you've made a good hire for weeks. Our first nanny had a great attitude and worked for cheap but had transportation issues and wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. She quit when she got pregnant. Our next nanny we fired after a week when my wife discovered she left one of our then infant sons asleep on the couch unattended where he could have easily rolled off. Our next Nanny quit after a few months because she felt that a nanny should make at least middle 5-figures a year. We then hired our current nanny who has been great. She's experienced and reliable.

Paying Your Nanny and Withholding
Keep track of gross pay. Withhold Social Security and Medicare (currently a combined 7.65%). Make sure you're setting that money aside for the end of the year when you'll have to give it to the IRS. As a household employer, you don't have to withhold federal income tax or NC income tax. I do for my Nanny because she wants me to so as to reduce what she may owe on her personal tax return. Pay your nanny the net after withholding. See the relevant IRS and NCDoR publications for the current withholding formulas.

Keep excellent records. Keep track of hours, gross pay, withholding amounts, net pay, dates paid, check numbers, etc...

PM me and I'll share my spreadsheets which handle calculating the withholding amounts factoring in exemptions claimed and whatnot.

Quarterly
You don't have to pay the Feds quarterly. Since you're a household employer, you settle up with them when you do your personal taxes by filing a Schedule-H.
File an NC-5 online and, if you're withholding income tax, pay them.
File an NCUI-101 and pay your unemployment tax. (rate changes year to year and based on past payment history)

Yearly
By Jan 31
You need to generate W-2s and W-3s on the Social Security website.
Provide said W-2 to your Nanny.
You need to file and NC-3 which is pretty much the worst process ever.
By April 15
File your taxes with the aforementioned Schedule-H.

References
IRS Publications 15 and 15a
NC-30
http://irouble.blogspot.com/2014/02/how-to-pay-nanny-taxes-in-north-carolina.html
https://iamemilyanne.com/2013/06/05/hiring-a-nanny-what-you-may-need-to-know-for-north-carolina/
https://iamemilyanne.com/2014/02/25/tax-time-torture/

8/26/2016 4:19:04 PM

elise
mainly potato
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ssclark

I belong to a local breastfeeding support group. They helped saved my nursing relationship with my son. Let me know if you have any questions, and if you are local she can add me on facebook and I can add her to the group.

8/26/2016 11:11:23 PM

Darb5000
All American
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So, my wife and I have a 20-month old son and a second due this week. Any recommendations on double strollers?

We have a Keyfit 30 infant seat so it will need to be something which is compatible. Initially looking at the Chico or Contours in-line double strollers.

8/29/2016 1:59:47 PM

OmarBadu
zidik
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don't waste money on anything other than a bob - we have the single and double after going through a few - nothing else i've used comes close

8/29/2016 2:44:29 PM

Darb5000
All American
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We have the single bob and do love it. Honestly I don't really want to put that much $ into a double, though. Also, I'm concerned about my wife's ability to load it in the cars. The bumper of my accord is already scratched up from the single....

8/29/2016 4:15:02 PM

Doss2k
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To be fair if you have a kid already you should go ahead and write your car off as ever not getting destroyed over time. You can try all you want but just about every ding and damage to the vehicle was in some way related to him. Just accept that your vehicle is in for a rough time and don't buy anything too nice or expensive and you will be happier I promise haha.

8/30/2016 8:50:05 AM

Darb5000
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Haha, fair point. Although I was thinking it would be my kids rather than wife messing it up....

8/30/2016 9:15:08 AM

Doss2k
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Quote :
"just about every ding and damage to the vehicle was in some way related to him."


Hence why I phrased it that way. Lot of it is directly done by them and then most of the other is somehow related to them like having to load and unload their stuff or other kids through playing with them hitting it with random objects etc.

8/30/2016 10:17:44 AM

HCH
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For those with Nanny's, did you provide a schedule or guidance of activities you want her to stick to throughout the day? The only guidance we've provided is that we want them to follow the Sleep, eat, play schedule. Other than that is up to the Nanny's discretion. Obviously, we want the twins to nap 1-2 hours at a time, but the past few days, they have been only napping in 20-45 minute intervals. I know this may be related to the 4 month regression, but I would hope a more regular schedule would help with this.

9/1/2016 1:18:14 PM

darkone
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^ We provided a basic outline with set nap and meal times. A lot of the play time is at the discretion of our nanny. Some days the boys will just play around the house. Other days the nanny might take them to story time at the library or to Marbles or whatever. Our nanny has a pre-school background so they do a lot of crafts on the nanny's initiative.

We also created a statement of mutual expectations with our nanny that outlines things like vacations (ours and her's), sick time, paid and unpaid leave, scope of duties, etc...

My wife is a real stickler about when the boys eat and nap. They're more flexible these days, but early on keeping to a strict schedule was a big benefit in managing the insanity of twins.

9/7/2016 12:35:33 PM

HCH
All American
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I would be really interested to see what your statement of mutual expectations looks like. I thought we were pretty clear when we made our offer ($14/hour, 3 weeks vacation). But now she is asking if she is getting paid when we are on vacation next week. So we need to have that difficult discussion to reset expectations. And I really don't want to have this discussion again.

9/7/2016 10:39:13 PM

afripino
All American
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^sounds like she thinks she's in a salaried position.

9/8/2016 10:23:36 AM

darkone
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^^ Ours include language on that. For us, we pay our Nanny for work days we cancel with the exception of a limited number of vacation days that we provide lots of notice for. They idea there is basically that we can plan to have our vacation time coincide to make everyone's' lives easier.

Our statement-of-expectations agreement basically outlines:
duties (scope of work, responsibilities, etc...)
hours (work days, work hours, mututal expectations for deviating from these hours, etc...)
pay (hourly rate, witholding details, method(s) of payment), expenses (what we'll reimburse for)
holidays/vacations/sick days/cancellations (holidays and whether or not we're paying for them, vacations for both parties, how we'd like sick leave to work, how cancellations work, etc...).

My suggestion is to talk to any Nanny you hire about how you would like things to work, how they would like things to work, and expect to iterate on these terms.

9/8/2016 1:05:49 PM

ssclark
Black and Proud
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will post a picture in just a sec !!

9/24/2016 11:43:54 AM

ssclark
Black and Proud
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mister Finn was born yesterday at 230 AM. He was pretty sick unfortunately... after laboring for 6 or 7 hours he started decompensating because of MAS so we had an emergent c section. He was struggling with breathing and currently isn't eating well, but he's doing a lot better today than yesterday. We're keeping our fingers crossed. Gonna try and feed him at 3... hoping

9/24/2016 1:26:35 PM

ssclark
Black and Proud
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still working on baby middle names ....

Finn Alexander Clark is the leader in the club house but we can't decide :X

I tried to go for

Again

Asaurus

or Ally


9/24/2016 1:33:38 PM

HCH
All American
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We got a text Saturday night from the Nanny saying she had to drive down to Florida because her sister and niece were killed in a car accident. It was pretty shocking news to receive. But since that time, we have received some information which would make us question the truthfulness of her text.

Anyway, we had to scramble Sunday to find child care for the week. Fortunately, we found a service called Stellar Sitters who act as a baby sitter placement service. They were great and were able to find a sitter for each day this week. So now we are working through Care to try to find a full time replacement. Where we wanted to get an older Nanny with more experience, we found that just brings a lot of baggage. So we are changing our strategy to identify a couple young part time nannys. In all likeliness, we will probably just hire Stellar Sitters to find the nannys as well.

Thanks for the information provided so far in this thread. We will certainly be using it this time around.

9/28/2016 2:08:36 PM

Kiwi
All American
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Congrats ssclark. I hit a fever of 103 that passed to my son so when he was born he had to go straight to nicu for 3 days. It's tough seeing your baby hooked up to everything, I know, I hope he breaks out of there quickly! Cute lil guy!

9/29/2016 2:37:58 PM

rjrumfel
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http://www.cnn.com/2016/10/13/health/mcdonald-conjoined-twins-to-separate/index.html

These kinds of stories never affected me before having children, now reading it is gut-wrenching.

I really hope things turn out well for this family.

10/13/2016 12:10:16 PM

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