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 Message Boards » » dealing with selfishness? Page [1]  
H8R
wear sumthin tight
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how do you go about dealing with someone who (is / always has been) given everything in life and relationships?
how do you go about breaking the habit / helping them see how selfish their actions are without losing them as a friend?

5/16/2007 2:19:08 PM

sylvershadow
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you cant change people, they have to change themselves.

5/16/2007 2:22:45 PM

Lokken
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write a note and then at the bottom give them check boxes for wether or not they are still your friend.

5/16/2007 2:22:53 PM

BobbyDigital
Thots and Prayers
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Quote :
"you cant change people, they have to change themselves."

5/16/2007 2:25:02 PM

Lokken
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joking aside he didnt once ask how to change someone.

5/16/2007 2:25:49 PM

BobbyDigital
Thots and Prayers
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^
Quote :
"how do you go about breaking the habit "

5/16/2007 2:28:01 PM

mathman
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take them on vacation in the third world, and not the tourist friendly part.

5/16/2007 2:28:45 PM

Lokken
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Quote :
"/ helping them see how selfish their actions are without losing them as a friend?
"

5/16/2007 2:29:09 PM

Skack
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You point it out every chance you get and shun them as subhuman when they act that way.

5/16/2007 2:36:09 PM

BobbyDigital
Thots and Prayers
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^^So are you going to try to answer any of the guy's questions or just split cunt hairs?

5/16/2007 2:36:55 PM

hunterb2003
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play just the tip

5/16/2007 2:53:41 PM

SkankinMonky
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Usually they don't realize they're being selfish. If you lay it out from your point of view POLITELY then they usually understand. The more you point it out the more they become self-aware and try to avoid the behavior that's pissing you, and probably others off.

5/16/2007 2:54:48 PM

SSJ4SonGokou
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^That's pretty much the best way, but you definitely have to do it VERY POLITELY so as not to alienate them. And if they don't understand, then tell them you will respectfully point it out to them the next time they do something. The main thing is to relax and not let their stubborness get you worked up and angry, as they will then feel attacked and get on the defensive. Use "I" phrases; e.g., "I feel disrespected when you do... or say..." that way they know you're not just blaming them but that their actions are affecting your feelings.

5/16/2007 4:30:15 PM

synchrony7
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Why would you even want to be friends with someone like that? They sound like an enormous tool.

5/16/2007 5:42:35 PM

TreeTwista10
minisoldr
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your ho will never be the housewife you desire, H8R

5/16/2007 5:45:46 PM

budman97420
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If this a girl and by friend you mean someone you want to be with or fuck..... then fucking run man, run!

5/16/2007 6:13:24 PM

kiljadn
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THROAT PUNCHES

5/16/2007 6:58:44 PM

drtaylor
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i don't know that you're selfish if you're given things that's more like fortunate

just fyi

5/16/2007 7:41:31 PM

9one9
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forced atm

5/16/2007 8:12:50 PM

MeatStick
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Are they selfish because they expect it and rub your face in it, or is it more "selfish" because you're jealous?

5/16/2007 10:21:57 PM

H8R
wear sumthin tight
60155 Posts
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Quote :
"SkankinMonky
All American
727 Posts
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edit post Usually they don't realize they're being selfish. If you lay it out from your point of view POLITELY then they usually understand. The more you point it out the more they become self-aware and try to avoid the behavior that's pissing you, and probably others off.

5/16/2007 2:54:48 PM

SSJ4SonGokou
All American
1677 Posts
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edit post ^That's pretty much the best way, but you definitely have to do it VERY POLITELY so as not to alienate them. And if they don't understand, then tell them you will respectfully point it out to them the next time they do something. The main thing is to relax and not let their stubborness get you worked up and angry, as they will then feel attacked and get on the defensive. Use "I" phrases; e.g., "I feel disrespected when you do... or say..." that way they know you're not just blaming them but that their actions are affecting your feelings."



thank you.




Quote :
"Why would you even want to be friends with someone like that? They sound like an enormous tool."


they were never like this before, just more of a phase/change thing
been friends for quite a while really. i am being asked for advice here.




Quote :
"your ho will never be the housewife you desire, H8R"


not an option




Quote :
"If this a girl and by friend you mean someone you want to be with or fuck..... then fucking run man, run!"


&

Quote :
"Are they selfish because they expect it and rub your face in it, or is it more "selfish" because you're jealous?"


i am not involved here, just being asked for advice. i dont really care why they are selfish, just wondering how to deal with it and not wreck a relationship

5/16/2007 11:21:58 PM

slaptit
All American
2991 Posts
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a girl being self-centered or selfish??? couldnt be

5/17/2007 9:37:01 PM

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