College A:

Pays X.
Is in same city as I am in now.
My girl is in same city as well.
Taught summer course there for 5 weeks, and I loved it. (established college since 2000)


College B:

Pays 2X.
Is 2 hours away by air.
Not familiar with work environment or students there.
Is a startup this Sep., so has to be chaotic and disorganized.



(other benefits are nearly the same)



I picked Job A.


Tell me I am stupid


What would you pick?


[Edited on September 15, 2007 at 6:04 PM. Reason : \/ ]

9/15/2007 5:58:03 PM

you're stupid

but i would have picked A too

9/15/2007 6:02:54 PM

sometimes you gotta take chances. sounds like you've convinced yourself B was the wrong move. two times your salary is pretty huge. considering you've only been at the other place for a month, it sounds like you made the decision for the wrong reasons (woman/scared of moving).

9/15/2007 6:46:39 PM

Quote :

"you're stupid but i would have picked A too"

Some things are worth more than money.
But damn, it would have been hard to turn down twice the pay.

9/15/2007 6:58:58 PM

did you try to negociate with job a? hey i'm have a job offer for 2x the pay i enjoy this place so give me 1.5x and i'll stay.

9/15/2007 7:03:08 PM

If you offered me 2x my salary to move away 2 hours by air or what like 6-8 hours by car I would NOT take it. Living near family is much more important to me than a damn job that can drop you like a fly, and would if the going got tough. If you live in/near a city like Charlotte or Raleigh there are plenty ofplaces to work.

This is esp. true if your 'girl' is wife material, and esp. true since you enjoy what you're doing. Answer it like "Office Space" "What would you do if you had a million dollars?" Well where would you live if you had your pick of anywhere? Now make that happen.

9/15/2007 10:27:16 PM

shrug. i live 3-4 hours away from my family. they come up and visit now and then and we get to do things we normally wouldnt get to (skiing, seeing the fall leaves, exploring a new state). id like to be closer, but refusing to move away from your family is limiting your options.

sure there are plenty of other jobs you can get, but theres also plenty of other candidates as well. by refusing to move you are limiting those jobs further and likely cutting off potential career paths and/or promotions. it is a dumb move while you are young.

i know i believe this b/c my dad harped on it a ton while i was growing up. we moved a ton, despite family and/or kids. i got to experience a lot of things i wouldnt otherwise have (as did my parents) and my dad progressed much further in his career than many of his peers who stayed "close to home." as a result, he was able to retire early and move close to his family again, thus giving him that benefit and retiring at 49/50.

9/16/2007 12:39:39 AM

Different stroke for different folks I guess. I'd trade some financial freedom to stay close to my loved ones. They may not be around when you retire.

9/16/2007 10:13:25 AM

no doubt. that said, theres a difference between a little financial freedom and double your salary. they definitely wont be around when you finally retire if you consistently make choice like that.

9/16/2007 10:28:16 AM

Hmmm... nice responses.

Will respond to them later... gotta take my late afternoon nap now for 90 minutes.

9/16/2007 10:33:04 AM

90 MINUTE NAP. WHAT ARE YOU, STUPID!?

9/16/2007 11:41:50 AM

Naps are awesome. Don't get down on a brother because he takes a nap.

9/16/2007 12:40:36 PM

I would have picked A too.

that wasnt stupid.

but you still might be stupid for other reasons.

9/17/2007 9:36:07 AM

A was the best choice, but man, you should negotiate some more cash or something.

I moved ~8 hours by car away from all of my family / friends for a job & hated every moment of it. Back in Raleigh now and loving it.

9/17/2007 10:46:14 AM

I'd pick A.

9/17/2007 2:25:22 PM

seriously, if youre gonna move away from friends and family, move somewhere 8+ hours by plane.

fuck a two-hour puddle jump.

9/17/2007 8:22:29 PM

your stupid and I would have probably picked A as well.

9/17/2007 9:29:43 PM

your [sic] stupid

9/18/2007 10:29:06 AM

You're stupid if you've only been dating your girl for less than 6mo....

If its been over a year and you're still madly in love with her, then no, you're not stupid

9/18/2007 11:26:36 AM

Interesting responses. Almost everybody says they would do the same. Here is some more info:

1 - Arabs are not known for being friendly/polite. My initial offer at job A was the first grade on the scale (out of 12 grades). I neogtiated and requested the 3rd grade, which would have given me $200 more/month. The Dean offered me the 2nd grade, which is $100 more/month than the 1st grade/initial offer. When I pushed a bit more for the 3rd grade, he told me not to push it and that he didn't like it. If I was in a country/place with rights, I would have walked out, but being an expat (of a nationality not generally respected here), I know "my place". Last thing I want is to be summarily fired without any legal reason and then have to leave the country (happens to hundreds of thousands). So I accpepted what was given to me. Ans yes, I told him I had 2 other offers, one 2x, and another 1.5x, but that I had already said no to them to stay here because I liked his college. Doesn't matter... I am dispensable.

2 - I have 3 financial obligations currently which require monthly payments: apartment in UAE, life insurance policy, retirement plan with my bank. These combined will eat up 85% of monthly basic salary (at job A). Doesn't leave me much, does it? Would you guys still choose A?

3 - I also get a housing allowance. If I add that to my basic pay, it becomes 70% of the pay at job B. Now not so bad. And yes, I am currently living for free with others. And that's why I can combine the basic pay and housing allowance and look at that as my basic pay. Job B offers a furnished apartment instead of a housing allowance.

4 - 2 hours by plane = 15 hours by road, not 6-8 as someone said.

5 - I have been with my girl for 2 years 6 months. Engaged for 2 years 3 months.

6 - Startup educational institutions are notorious for being chaotic and unbelievably disorganized in the Middle East. That was the main reason I didn't go for job B. Also, being a foreigner in this country (and my girl is a foreigner here as well), the laws are tough on us. We can't just jump from job to job freely. All foreigners here have a legal "sponsor" (who is of course a local). Technically, your sponsor should be your employer. But, many people have their sponsorship under one person, and then they work freelance or for another employer. This is illegal, but in the Gulf countries, everything is impossible, and anything is possible. With connections, that is. But, I don't want to mess with that. So, if I had chosen job B, and hated it there, I would be stuck there for some time, as you can only transfer your sponsorship only 3 times here. So, you want to make sure that you pick your employment wisely, some place you will like. Not only that, but some employers are horrible human beings, and if they don't like you, they won't let you transfer to another employer; they will give you a final exit from the country. Do not want that. It is a glorified legalized slavery system.

7 - My girl is a teacher in a very good British school, and this is her 6th year there. We are planning to get married in December. If I had chosen job B, she would have had to quit her job and find employment in a school in the other city. But, I didn't want to do that to her, as she is very happy at her job, earning top notch salary (3x mine!), and she would lose many benefits if she started all over at another school.

8 - Naps are God's gift. Do not knock them. My 90 minute nap a couple of days ago (see my previous post) ended up being a 120 minute nap. And my daily naps since then have also been for 120 minutes. Love it. Sometimes better than sex!!!

9 - Job A is actually 25 miles outside the city. 2 hours of commute daily. That explains point 8 above as well. Horrible, but gives me time to actually learn some of the things I have wanted to learn for a long time, such as languages (ripped language CDs onto my iPod), some math stuff, etc. (I don't do the driving) So far in the 2 weeks, however, I have just been listening to my trance collection and preparing my lectures on the bus, instead of at home!

10 - Thanks for reading. Forgive any spelling mistakes.

9/18/2007 8:53:31 PM

i'd rather make salaryX and be happy than to make salaryX2 and actually have to work.

if you find a job you love you never work a day in your life.

9/18/2007 9:13:08 PM

your stupid

9/20/2007 6:02:58 PM

Quote :

"5 - I have been with my girl for 2 years 6 months. Engaged for 2 years 3 months."

you just confirmed your stupidity if this statement is indeed true

9/20/2007 6:06:31 PM

Quote :

"8 - Naps are God's gift. Do not knock them. My 90 minute nap a couple of days ago (see my previous post) ended up being a 120 minute nap. And my daily naps since then have also been for 120 minutes. Love it. Sometimes better than sex!!!"

i was just keeping the theme of this thread alive.

^^^ this bullshit is so tired i just dont know what to say. oh i love my job as a janitor, too bad it'll be hard to be a homeowner, go on nice vacations, or really just enjoy life outside of work without worrying about the bills.

[Edited on September 20, 2007 at 7:01 PM. Reason : .]

9/20/2007 7:00:51 PM

^^ ?topic=476017

Quote :

"My 6 months pregnant wife who........ *Has constantly started leaking a honey-like substance uncontrollably from her disgusting, fat nipples *Has pus-filled pimples all over her boobs and back *Has inch-long black hairs growing in her asscrack *Farts uncontrollably and her rat terrier-like muff reeks of homelessness Still gets me hard. That is all."

I wish I knew your wife's contact info so I could send that to her.

BTW, thanks for making whatever assumptions you made, jerk. Not everybody lives in the land of the great and free, not everybody can marry easily (talking of legal restrictions here), etc.

9/21/2007 7:32:37 PM

lol

and the amount of shit that you talk about the us

that is comedy

9/22/2007 3:10:56 PM

huh? what does that have to do with this thread?

and i don't "talk shit about the us". i condemn specific actions + policies of the US government that adversely affect people of other countries. when even 1 american is adversely affected by another country, most of you americans are up in arms and enraged... but the rest of the world can't say anything when millions are affected?

but anyway, what does this have to do with this thread? i fail to see the connection.

oh i forgot, you are a troll. don't respond.

9/22/2007 6:59:06 PM

Where are you located oep?

9/22/2007 10:04:20 PM

^^ your general hypocrisy makes me lol

that and you piss the bed

9/23/2007 1:21:31 PM

Quote :

"condemn specific actions + policies of the US government that adversely affect people of other countries. "

oh come on, you know that's bullshit as much as anyone. the sole remaining superpower can't do anything without potentially "Adversely affecting people of other countries" in some form....

i agree with you on some of the more blatant things but most of the time it's due to the peoples very government more than American action/inaction

9/24/2007 11:38:29 AM

I didn't read any of the thread, but you are fucking stupid if that makes you feel any better.

9/24/2007 2:33:28 PM

it really depends on the relationship you have with the girl and how much money means to you. i would assume that both X and 2X are far more than you need to survive decently, and if that's the case then go with A.

if, on the other hand, the difference between meeting your financial "needs" lies above X and below 2X, then that may be a better option, regardless.

9/24/2007 3:04:28 PM

you have picked good.

9/24/2007 8:29:56 PM

Quote :

" she is very happy at her job, earning top notch salary (3x mine)"

So, not knowing what her job situation would be if you moved, you might still be financially better off as a couple with job A? Do you share a bank account, or still seperate?

9/25/2007 2:56:14 PM

finding a good woman is much harder than finding a good job. You chose wisely.

Given a few years you should not need to worry about money much anyway, it's not like you are a janitor. Maybe this move will prevent you from buying some luxury item or saving a lot, but it surely should not get in the way of your basic needs. I am of course assuming that you have a woman who understands "need" verses "want", if this distinction is not made then no amount of money is enough.

9/26/2007 12:40:08 AM

2x the pay you could have used the extra money to travel back

i'm glad i left raleigh. i miss the area and my family but i did not like being surrounded by people who have never been anywhere and are too afraid to move away from what they know. i'm just not the type of person who can be the same place forever

9/30/2007 7:10:15 PM