You're 37. You're not in a sorority. You're not in college. You didn't even go to college.

So please fold the collar of your green polo shirt down, remove the bug-eye sunglasses that are secured with croakies, and stop wearing those ugly furry snowboots with your khaki skirt. Some girls can pull off the look, but your legs are too big and thick to even think about looking cute.

Also, stop calling all of your coworkers to make sure they survived the tornado that touched down last Friday night. Yes, the office building had minimal damage, but no, no one was here when it happened. You live 45 minutes away from here and you probably didn't have any rain, so stop telling people you were scared for your life.

Thanks,
Joe

PS - I blame you for making me accidentally post this in The Lounge


[Edited on March 17, 2008 at 7:42 AM. Reason : .]

3/17/2008 7:41:25 AM

I hate those furry boots. The worst is furry boots and skirts. It's like the person is having a giant weather identity crisis with their wardrobe.

3/17/2008 7:44:07 AM

I saw high heeled UGGs yesterday at the zoo. And not in a cage!





ok, that was a really bad joke, but I really saw them and we really were

3/17/2008 7:47:02 AM

im glad you are ok joe
i actually thought about you [no homo]

3/17/2008 7:47:10 AM

yeah i did too

i thought about making a

"did joen00mbers get blown....




away in the storm"

thread

but i didnt

3/17/2008 7:48:43 AM

this picture makes me say.. uggs are ok


[Edited on March 17, 2008 at 7:58 AM. Reason : ]

3/17/2008 7:57:11 AM

^ fail

3/17/2008 7:58:24 AM

See that girl is hot and all, but she would be hotter if she were wearing flip flops instead of stupid fucking boots

3/17/2008 8:28:06 AM

true

3/17/2008 8:39:16 AM

i'd hit it


and i too thought of a joenoombers tornado thread and i was nowhere near a computer

3/17/2008 8:50:08 AM

useless without pics (joe #'s)

3/17/2008 9:09:58 AM

thats sad

there was a thread a long time ago about having the collar up on a green shirt and if you fold it down, you had to do whatever the other person wanted sexually

maybe she wants you to fuck her

3/17/2008 9:23:03 AM

Yea, I probably wouldn't touch that even if I didn't have a girlfriend.

3/17/2008 9:44:35 AM

Quote :

"im glad you are ok joe i actually thought about you [no hetero]"

3/17/2008 10:32:04 AM

my gosh, is there anything more contemptible and pathetic than a middle-aged woman trying to dress like a schoolgirl

3/17/2008 10:34:02 AM

i would be very annoyed by this as well.

3/17/2008 10:41:41 AM

Quote :

"Yea, I probably wouldn't touch that even if I didn't have a girlfriend."

i was hoping that she would have at least been hot

that would make it manageable

3/17/2008 10:48:44 AM

i had a old lady (lifelong education) in one of my classes last semester that dressed as such

i hated when she wore her short skirts

3/17/2008 10:50:44 AM

If she turned you down for sex just call her a lesbian

3/17/2008 10:52:16 AM

Quote :

"If she turned you down for sex just call her a lesbian "

sounds like you have experience with this quote

3/17/2008 10:57:27 AM

the look might be cute if, when sitting down, your fat rolls don't stretch your shirt to its limit. unfortunately for my secretary, this isn't the case.

3/18/2008 8:53:59 AM

haha ok
so i have a pair of fake uggs
but they're not really THAT fake

they're rainbow brand
which makes them all the better

i swear i rock them and love them more because of it


oh, and they are light pink


jeeeebus i need to go get those from the house

3/18/2008 8:56:04 AM

no fat rolls though.

3/18/2008 8:57:01 AM

APPLE BOTTOM JEANS


BOOTS WITH THE FUR


SHE GOT THE WHOLE OFFICE LOOKIN AT HER

3/18/2008 8:58:03 AM

I like boots

just putting that out there

can't go wrong with a boot

3/18/2008 8:58:17 AM

^^^^ pics?

^^ also, i get that damn song stuck in my head at least 3 times a day.

[Edited on March 18, 2008 at 8:59 AM. Reason : ]

3/18/2008 8:58:31 AM

at least think of the travis barker remix.

3/18/2008 9:00:52 AM

Quote :

"^^^^ pics?"

none now
but i will be going home soon to pick them up damnit

and im adding this to my topics so i can post one

3/18/2008 9:04:40 AM

^ Awesome. I'll be adding this to My Topics to await them.

^^ I really enjoyed that actually. Dude must go through a fortune in sticks and cymbals though. Good thing he's rich.

3/18/2008 9:08:04 AM

Quote :

"Yea, I probably wouldn't touch that even if I didn't have a girlfriend."

aha, but you might.

3/18/2008 9:08:20 AM

i think i speak for most of us when i say just wear the boots and nothing else
thanks,

3/18/2008 9:08:44 AM

3/18/2008 9:11:05 AM

i'll get right on that.

3/18/2008 9:11:07 AM

i wish i played the drums.

3/18/2008 9:14:10 AM

joe I'm betting your secretary DID go to college

2 years at Berry and she dropped out

3/18/2008 9:31:04 AM

this thread is worse than blink182.

except for the discussion in broads in uggs.

3/18/2008 11:48:17 AM