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 Message Boards » » Possibly quitting job, need to address insecurity. Page [1] 2, Next  
cddweller
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Because we are an employee-owned company, my current employer has conducted a family/team atmosphere where we are encouraged to have a strong connective work ethic. The way they act, quitting wouldn't just be rude, it would be a personal attack on HR and management. I am applying for several jobs and will wait for one to "come through" before giving two weeks notice, but am worried about the way they will take the news. As we work in a team-intensive environment, it has been a major milestone in my life to socialize myself with the coworkers and bosses, and to undo all of the "bonding" as part of the business world I'll have to overcome another boundary: stepping up and being bold, looking out for myself.

Reasons for leaving: My hours are irregular, the pay does not compensate fully for the amount of productivity and sacrifices the employees provide, and the excessive wear-and-tear on my vehicle (averaging 200-500 miles of driving per week during the busy season). There are plenty of others, but these are the big ones.

A previous thread was made and closed about a year ago on this topic, but the OP and repliers didn't address this issue of emotional insecurity. We see ourselves as an elite few that can rough out the in-between-season dead spells, the insane drive times, and other peculiarities that the job entails (acting as a school photographer, we are a clown, a shrink, an artist, company representative, and salesmen). The problem here is that I have come to see my employers as these tyrants that own my life. They pat me on the back, and I splooge my pants. I'm a pretty insecure person and have spent the past few years developing a keen sense of professional spine, and this will be my first exposure to quitting (as this was my first real job). The job has become a lifestyle and a source of satisfaction, never wrong for anyone, but it should not be a crutch or impediment to my career, and I see no sense in climbing this company's ladder (the management, admin and HR are all underpaid).

Any advice?

5/7/2009 5:35:52 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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If your reasons for leaving are rational, which it sounds like they are, you should be comfortable with the fact you're making a rational decision. Of course there is a good chance your employers will be jerks about you leaving, but there is nothing you can do about it. You just have to tell yourself, "This is what's best for me," and don't let them guilt trip you over quitting. People quit all the time and I'm sure you're not the first person to quit this company.

5/7/2009 5:51:56 AM

cddweller
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I've seen them quit, actually. A lot of them. Thing is, our photo manager made life miserable for them, to the point where they wish they had just walked out instead of giving 2 weeks notice. One girl was so stressed on her last day she had trouble getting her key off the ring.

5/7/2009 5:56:57 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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At least you know what you're in for

In all seriousness, you know that behavior is unwarranted and unprofessional. Just find your happy place for the two weeks after you give notice and let it roll off your back as best you can.

5/7/2009 6:02:44 AM

wdprice3
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Quote :
"Thing is, our photo manager made life miserable for them, to the point where they wish they had just walked out instead of giving 2 weeks notice. One girl was so stressed on her last day she had trouble getting her key off the ring."


Quote :
"Because we are an employee-owned company, my current employer has conducted a family/team atmosphere where we are encouraged to have a strong connective work ethic."


DOES NOT COMPUTE

This is not a family/friendly workplace if you have this big of an asshole running things. It's a business and the manager/owner/etc should understand business - if you aren't happy with your current status and have the opportunity to change that, then that's just business. In all fairness have you asked for your work status to be improved?

5/7/2009 7:45:51 AM

Hurley
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Quote :
"In all seriousness, you know that behavior is unwarranted and unprofessional."



How did you synthesize that?

5/7/2009 7:47:27 AM

se7entythree
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i'm not trying to pick, but aren't irregular hours pretty common in photography?

5/7/2009 7:49:44 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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^^
Quote :
"our photo manager made life miserable for them, to the point where they wish they had just walked out instead of giving 2 weeks notice. One girl was so stressed on her last day she had trouble getting her key off the ring."


How is that not unwarranted or unprofessional?

[Edited on May 7, 2009 at 8:39 AM. Reason : m]

5/7/2009 8:39:05 AM

69
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ask for a two week vacation, then give them your notice before you leave, its what everyone here does

5/7/2009 8:45:51 AM

krs3g
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They sound like a group of manipulative bastards. They'd do well for themselves to develop a moral retention policy for good employees, starting first with decent compensation. At they end of the day they don't have your best interest at heart, despite whatever family vibe you guys have in the office. They're looking out for themselves and you're certainly making the right move by doing the same. You've given them a few years of good service, you owe them nothing. Go elsewhere and get what you're worth.

5/7/2009 9:54:16 AM

simonn
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what in the fuck is going on here? just quit.

5/7/2009 10:13:41 AM

mcfluffle
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what in the fuck is going on here? just quit.

5/7/2009 11:10:55 AM

radu
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While there's something to be said for the personal ambition of an owner, as a manager, there should really be 2 goals: customer success, and employee success. A good manager will support their employees leaving if there's a better opportunity, or look into finding a way to entice the employee to stay. Otherwise they are a bad manager, and a bad manager isn't really worth working for in the long term.

Or a simpler way to rationalize is to just take the Godfather philosophy when it comes to business.

5/7/2009 11:16:28 AM

Ernie
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Dear Wolfweb,

How do I wipe?

-- Mudbutt in Raleigh

5/7/2009 11:24:04 AM

radu
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this is terrible, but I have the answer to your question Ernie:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZOOSs9I5NY

5/7/2009 11:32:58 AM

Kiwi
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Pretty good answers ITT. After you quit your first job it gets a lot easier with your second and third and fourth....

5/7/2009 1:32:50 PM

Stimwalt
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I don't suggest leaving the company by taking a two week vacation and then giving your two week notice. That is bad form, and could come back to haunt you. What you want to do is to leave the company as you entered, in high regard. If you feel like you have developed a professional spine, prove it to them and yourself. Face the music, once the dust has settled, you will gained more from the experience than any boss could possibly dream of taking away.

5/7/2009 1:47:44 PM

stevedude
hello
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hah.. i knew 2 chicks who worked there and ended up quitting too....

5/7/2009 2:41:21 PM

Supplanter
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As someone who has worked for a small business (about 18 employees) with a sort of “family feel” for 3 years & who is quitting to go to grad school at NCSU in August, I can share my experience.

Just as with a real family I’ve experienced both close connections
(socializing together outside of work, hugging your boss when they are crying, getting asked to attend a coworkers family member's funeral, visiting a coworker's bedside after an attempted suicide, having them throw me a wedding shower, consoling a coworker after a surprise pregnancy, celebrating birthdays & other holidays together, pitching in to help out with other peoples duties, staying late regularly to finish special projects, working from home off the clock to help boost our finances during a bad economy, & grabbing a drink next door after work)

& disappointments
(irregular hours, not getting raises on time, getting blamed for coworkers mistakes, having to pick up others slack, watching someone you trusted get fired for stealing & so on).

And vet clinics create certain bonds when you know your work & team work is often crucial in the emergencies that come in on almost a daily basis & in life & death situations where emotions can run high.

A real family will support you if you present it as an attempt to make something better of yourself. I was as upfront as possible. I joked with my manager about giving a 5 months’ notice instead of a 2 weeks’ notice (although she already had an idea that I might get in to grad school since I had asked her to write one of my letters of recommendation well before that)

So the short version of my advice is if you care about them but you think you can achieve something better, be as upfront as possible, but work so hard right up until the day you leave that they will be glad to have had you for the time that they could.

5/7/2009 4:04:19 PM

cddweller
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^I love it, thanks. I'll re-read this before the Big Talk (takes deep breath, lol).
Quote :
"In all fairness have you asked for your work status to be improved?"
Yes.
Quote :
"I'm not trying to pick, but aren't irregular hours pretty common in photography?"
They are, but I have found several opportunities I'm interviewing for that do have regular hours.
Quote :
"hah.. i knew 2 chicks who worked there and ended up quitting too...."
You... know where I work...?

5/7/2009 7:53:52 PM

Ernie
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You've mentioned it several times.

You know we can see your posts, right?

5/7/2009 7:59:38 PM

stevedude
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^^
Quote :
"You've mentioned it several times.

You know we can see your posts, right?"

5/7/2009 8:08:30 PM

wolfpackgrrr
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And never mind the fact there's only what, two companies that do school photography in the area?

5/7/2009 8:50:34 PM

cddweller
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Yeah, I guess. Strawbridge too. We pass their shit around at the office and just laugh sometimes.

5/7/2009 10:04:25 PM

Master_Yoda
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From what it sounds like, RUN! RUN VERY FAST. But yes, they are bastards and id get away as fast as possible.

5/7/2009 10:32:09 PM

erice85
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always good to get insight about the company that usually totally fucked up our school pictures

thanks lifetouch

ps. your office is in a weird fucking place

5/7/2009 11:31:40 PM

cddweller
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How to follow up with an interview if I am working full-time already? Would asking for an interview in the evening be unprofessional?

5/8/2009 2:54:30 PM

krs3g
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^Very much so, I can't imagine very many employers would be willing to stay after business hours just to meet with a prospect, especially a larger corporation since their screening process may require interviews with more than one person. You're going to need to figure out a way to be available during business hours. Long lunch, half day, or fake an illness that requires several visits to a physician over a relatively short period of time.

5/8/2009 3:11:54 PM

Stimwalt
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This is when you fake an illness. If you ask for time off and they don't grant it, then faking an illness will be obvious. Don't give them the option to deny you, lie.

5/8/2009 3:19:26 PM

cddweller
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5/8/2009 3:25:37 PM

Jax883
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If the deception is necessary, then so be it

5/8/2009 3:53:37 PM

Arab13
Art Vandelay
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sounds like your employer's have found the perfect mix to get the most out of you, make you unwilling to leave, and not pay you as well as they should all while making it seem like it's your fault

5/8/2009 4:02:47 PM

roddy
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Just send them the link to this thread and you dont have to talk to them.

[Edited on May 10, 2009 at 2:50 PM. Reason : w]

5/10/2009 2:47:51 PM

9one9
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Hey cddweller, here's a little life lesson for you.

Companies dont give a fuck about you or what you want.

Quit your fucking job and stop acting like you're giving a child up for adoption.

5/10/2009 10:39:37 PM

Lionheart
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I've always thought the day to day approach in business should be more professional, that way shit like this doesn't come up.

Employers, even the best, will all eventually do something as a business decision solely and employees should be able to do the same without being made to feel like douches

As personal policy goes I try to strictly avoid mixing business and personal life, you're not gonna see me spending time outside of work with coworkers. I'm not paid to talk shop or manage my work relationships outside of work and if you get attached and then somebody fucks you over etc.

This sort of thing may hurt your view with the company but if your work is good and valuable you can get by it as long as you're pleasant and easy to get along with. Admittedly this is easier in a scientific or technical field.

Long story short, the company could fire you tomorrow and you could quit tomorrow just as easily and as long as everyone is just professional it shouldn't be seen as anything other than a business decision, unfortunately that doesn't sound like your company sees it that way.

[Edited on May 10, 2009 at 11:50 PM. Reason : words]

5/10/2009 11:44:09 PM

roddy
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^I agree totally, I had this one female coworker that I basically told her that we are friends and "lunch buddies" but that is all it will ever be. She asked for my number and I told her no....you cant play mind games! She knows exactly where I stand, no ifs, ands, or buts about it!

5/11/2009 1:06:15 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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Quote :
"As personal policy goes I try to strictly avoid mixing business and personal life, you're not gonna see me spending time outside of work with coworkers. I'm not paid to talk shop or manage my work relationships outside of work and if you get attached and then somebody fucks you over etc."


I don't think there's anything wrong with talking shop or whatever, but it's good to set boundaries for yourself. I tend to only talk about dumb superficial shit with coworkers. It gives you the advantage of looking personable without really talking about anything personal at all.

5/11/2009 1:14:16 AM

Mindstorm
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I don't see anything wrong with being friends with people at work and meeting up outside of work for things. I will not play the politics game, though. At every job where I've found my coworkers to be tolerable, I've made some effort to be friends with all of them, within reason.

I definitely would never get into a relationship with somebody at work unless it was something like where you work at a huge ass company in completely different parts of the office (I'm talking like an office with a thousand people at it).

5/11/2009 1:37:13 AM

Lionheart
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Not saying you can't manage it both ways,just my past experiences lead me to this sort of decision for myself. For instance I really burned some bridges when I wouldn't do some computer maintinence for free even though it was for the "good of everybody at the company" back when I was on contract work.

5/11/2009 4:44:40 PM

cddweller
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^^I've become an ear to most of the ladies, but when it comes to "talking shop" and "sharing" I fall short because of my antisocial self, fortunately. The younger employees in my age group all have their little clique, where they know who's dating whom (in and out of the company, yes, they do get involved, and most of the time they keep it out of the office), hanging out at bars and such, inviting each other over for celebrations and stuff. I'm more or less referring to the "family" bond that the management forges with the younger staff in hopes of sucking us up and keeping us as indentured servants.

I dropped the c-word when I applied - I love photography and thought it would be impossible to find a job with constant hours in the field. This was as close as it came to such a job at the time (although I'm finding these positions more and more often as second-shooters and album designers), so I mentioned to HR that I saw this as a career path. She instantly got the spark in her eye, and after hiring and training, confided in me that they are more interested in photogs who will stay with the company for life.

[Edited on May 12, 2009 at 7:25 AM. Reason : .]

5/12/2009 7:23:49 AM

cddweller
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Quick question - didn't want to create a new thread for this.

If we're really slow because we depend on seasonal work, and get the hint from our boss we'll be out another two weeks (he said it would only be two weeks a month ago), should I even bother giving my two-weeks notice? A job has popped up that might need me sooner, and during the phone interview next week I plan on mentioning that I'll need to give them 2-weeks notice, but I don't see the need. They sure as hell won't need me.

5/29/2009 6:36:36 AM

KeB
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I think that his offering of employment to you is so hit and miss right now that you approaching him professionally and just explaining the fact that you are moving to a more permanent postion(whether this is the case or not) should be sufficient. With the way things are now with employment you have to respect that.

5/29/2009 7:00:47 AM

cddweller
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So... no two weeks notice, just walk out?

Last dude who did that, they talked garbage about him for weeks after. Problem is, he left during the middle of the busy season - just rolled his equipment in, tacked a note on the wall over it, and disappeared even though he had a week of work scheduled down the road. I'd do the same thing because there is no work, but I'm worried that the boss might give me grief because there might be one or two days he HAS scheduled me to work (of course, we don't find out our work schedule for the next week until Friday, so you have 3 days warning).

5/29/2009 7:15:25 AM

Stimwalt
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Listen, you need to let go. If you need to move on for the sake of your career, do it. No company really cares about any of their employees that much, you need to seize the day. What your old boss says or thinks doesn't matter, it's your life, live it.

5/29/2009 8:25:35 AM

Amsterdam718
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is this a cult? it sounds like a cult. save yourself cddweller. RUN!

5/29/2009 9:33:33 AM

gunzz
IS NÚMERO UNO
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Quote :
"should I even bother giving my two-weeks notice"

you should always give a 2 week notice unless you are being fired
or unless you dont want to use this job as a reference on your resume.

if your boss doesnt let you work the remainder of the 2 weeks then there is nothing you can do
but you will have the satisfaction of handling your situation in a professional manner.

5/29/2009 10:02:30 AM

cddweller
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That's what I thought...

5/29/2009 10:42:07 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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^^ This.

5/31/2009 1:44:39 AM

vinylbandit
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Quote :
"Last dude who did that, they talked garbage about him for weeks after."


So? Why do they have to like you?

5/31/2009 7:46:59 AM

wolfpackgrrr
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^ Exactly. I recently found out from a friend that a manager that I used to work for yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeears ago was apparently PMSing and started bitching about all these people who used to work for her, myself included. At first I was a little upset, then a little pissed, then I said, "wtf, why am I even worried about this? She pulled that same sort of crap when I worked there!" and realized I shouldn't take it personally at all, especially since I stopped working there ages ago now.

5/31/2009 9:00:50 AM

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