older/younger is your SO?

Did you have a limit in mind and ignored it?

The reason I ask is that my SO is 3 years older, yet is compatible with me in most ways and we can meet in the middle for the rest of them.

I always thought that I'd meet someone my age or younger (my personality leans towards that), but that's been thrown out the window. I don't even think about it. My parents on the other had, do/did.

6/9/2009 12:49:39 PM

NO SO

6/9/2009 12:51:26 PM

If you call her your "SO," it means you're actually not attracted to women.

6/9/2009 12:53:55 PM

^ haha

my wife (THAT MEANS I"M A REAL MAN) is about 6 months older than i am

6/9/2009 1:01:24 PM

i see someone doesn't believe in caps lock

SHIFT KEYS FOR LIFE

6/9/2009 1:07:53 PM

you know it dawg. i don't give a what about apostrophes

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 1:09 PM. Reason : can i move this to chit chat yet?]

6/9/2009 1:09:04 PM

he's 4 years and 4 months older than i am

although he acts like he's 5

(haha i did my math the wrong way)

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 1:13 PM. Reason : .]

6/9/2009 1:11:12 PM

my SO / BF / WHATEV

is like 9 months younger than me. rawr.

6/9/2009 1:11:40 PM

I'm currently having trouble dating a girl 4 years younger than me (she's 22, I'm about to turn 26). I've always dated girls my age or older (usually a couple years older, but sometimes up to 9 years older). I enjoy dating older women, and only find problems when they don't think its possible to have a serious relationship with a guy who's that much younger than them. Most of the times they get over it, but sometimes they don't.

As for my problems with the current younger lady...it probably all boils down to the immaturity level. Our conversation is just limited. I don't want to talk about politics and religion all the time...but sometimes I like having a conversation on a higher level intellectually. I can solve this by just talking to my other friends who are my age or older...but would like to have this option with the girl I'm dating. Its basically coming down to whether or not I want to wait for her to grow up and become an adult...or if I think she has a low ceiling when it comes to the intellectual level I desire in a girlfriend and if I think hers is too low. That sounds bad when I read it...but I feel like having someone you can talk to on a similar level is extremely important in a relationship.

6/9/2009 1:15:47 PM

We're born in the same year. Didn't plan on being with someone particularly older or younger, but I didn't want to be like my parents - dad's 14 years older than mom.

6/9/2009 1:16:03 PM

^^ i feel like 22 is like on the cusp of being your "same" age. what i mean is that when you are in your mid 20s, i feel like age gaps shrink. like i don't feel like my 28 and 29 year old cousins and friends are 4 and 5 years older than me. when they were 25 and i was 20 i noticed the age difference A LOT more. they were "old"

so i feel like 22 to 26 is ALMOST bridging the age gap, but i think 21/22 is still a little young. but like you say in a year or two when you are 28 and she is 24, i don't think the age difference will seem as large at all. i don't know, this was probably really confusing i can't really figure out how to articulate what i mean! but i understand what you are saying completely haha.

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 1:25 PM. Reason : .]

6/9/2009 1:24:57 PM

she's 2 years older. met when i was a junior in HS and she was a freshman in college. been together 4 yrs.

i never thought about a limit. just knew i was mature for my age and got along w/ slightly older folks better back then.

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 1:28 PM. Reason : ]

6/9/2009 1:26:27 PM

one month younger

6/9/2009 1:31:56 PM

My girlfriend is 7 years younger than I am. She's 26 and everything is fantastic. My lower limit was 23-24 or so and they must have a job or be in grad school. She is not particularly into older guys but we're perfect for each other so nothing else seems to matter.

6/9/2009 1:32:18 PM

Quote :

"i feel like 22 is like on the cusp of being your "same" age. what i mean is that when you are in your mid 20s, i feel like age gaps shrink. like i don't feel like my 28 and 29 year old cousins and friends are 4 and 5 years older than me. when they were 25 and i was 20 i noticed the age difference A LOT more. they were "old" so i feel like 22 to 26 is ALMOST bridging the age gap, but i think 21/22 is still a little young. but like you say in a year or two when you are 28 and she is 24, i don't think the age difference will seem as large at all. i don't know, this was probably really confusing i can't really figure out how to articulate what i mean! but i understand what you are saying completely haha."

Definitely understand what you're saying. Don't think she quite falls into my category just because of our situations. She just graduated college and her life goes like this: "wait tables a couple days a week, go to beach as much as possible, go out as much as possible, go backpacking in Europe in September, bitch about my parents bugging me about a job." I actually don't disagree with her at all. She was a Comm. major and there is no job market for anything that she has done in Charleston. I also encourage travel at a young age when you can do it. But right now I'm all about saving money, working as much as possible, paying back my law school loans, and trying to figure out what I'm doing with my life/degree. I try to keep up with her to a certain extent when it comes to going out and partying...and it's not so much that I can't do it, its that I don't want to do it all the time and its kind of holding me back.

So you can definitely put people in the same category if they are different ages (and I would normally agree with 22-26)...but the bottom line is that we're just at different points in our life.

6/9/2009 1:34:00 PM

My girlfriend is 7 years younger than I am. She's 26 and everything is fantastic. My lower limit was 23-24 or so and they must have a job or be in grad school. She is not particularly into older guys but we're perfect for each other so nothing else seems to matter.

6/9/2009 1:34:30 PM

my wife is almost exactly 3 years younger than me

6/9/2009 1:42:29 PM

not dating but 21 is my limit because of the under 21 impasse

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 1:45 PM. Reason : 24 now, 25 in dec]

6/9/2009 1:45:15 PM

My wife is 8 months older than I am.

6/9/2009 1:59:19 PM

^^^^^She sounds like a one of "those" girls... the hot sorority girl with no brain. I guess tho, since you're a lawyer, that's what you aim for, like she was probably aiming for an older guy with moneys.

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 2:10 PM. Reason : meh]

6/9/2009 2:09:48 PM

We are 4 months apart, married, and everything is great. Back when dating I never had any strict age cut offs, all that mattered was personality & similar maturity level, but I think I never dated anyone more than 3 years older or younger in either direction.

6/9/2009 2:10:10 PM

My girlfriend is 7 months younger than me. But, like several others, that was not by design at all, just by chance (met through respective friends who were dating). I didn't ever really have a hard limit, just what seems reasonable, and that of course changes with age. i.e. at 25, I probably wouldn't have dated under 21 or over 28-29...for someone who's single at 30 or 35, the range would probably widen to expand a bit more than -4/+3.

Though I'm sure they do bring on some challenges, relationships can still work with a large age gap. My grandparents on my dad's side were 11 years apart; when they got married my grandfather was 22 and my grandmother 33. They were happily married for 42 years.

6/9/2009 2:11:20 PM

My ex was just a few months difference. I've dated 4 years younger, but I don't think it could have be long term serious. I don't think I would date anyone that much younger again, but I probably would date someone that was 4-5 years older. I guess being in the mid twenties, I have more in common with someone around 30 than someone around 20.

6/9/2009 2:31:17 PM

Quote :

"She sounds like a one of "those" girls... the hot sorority girl with no brain. I guess tho, since you're a lawyer, that's what you aim for, like she was probably aiming for an older guy with moneys."

Not at all actually...except for maybe the "hot" part because I think she's absolutely beautiful. She's an extremely sweet girl that did well in college (and wasn't in a sorority). Due to my own personal situations, I had to grow up at a young age. I can't help the fact that this girl has a stable family and she hasn't had to hold down full time jobs since she was 18. Hopefully I can make life easy for my kids the way her parents did for her. I'm not going to hold it against someone that they haven't had to go through a lot and are still at a young age.

And I usually aim for the exact opposite of what you described (except maybe for the "hot" part again), but nice try on the generalization. Don't take your insecurities out on me.

6/9/2009 2:35:35 PM

Don't ever date someone born on the same day as you. It's mega trouble if you forget their birthday.

6/9/2009 2:36:03 PM

her:23
me:25

younger is the only way to go

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 2:41 PM. Reason : .]

6/9/2009 2:40:59 PM

wife is 10 mths younger....

on 105.1 they had a lady call in who said her low 50 year old father married an 18 year old... I remember thinking, wow... 3x her age.

what was the Chinese rule on this, "half your age + 7"?

6/9/2009 2:45:29 PM

My husband is just shy of 3 years older than me. It hasn't been an issue at all.

6/9/2009 3:08:49 PM

My girlfriend is almost 5 years older than me. It caused a few awkward moments at first, but it hardly ever crosses my mind anymore. I would say we are at similar places in life.

6/9/2009 3:12:16 PM

i'm 3 years older than the wife.

6/9/2009 3:42:37 PM

I'm about a year and a half older than my boo.

6/9/2009 3:52:48 PM

Quote :

"I'm about a year and a half older younger than my boo."

6/9/2009 4:03:15 PM

I am in almost the exact opposite situation as JT3buttfuck

I'm 24 and she's 19/20 (however old you are between sophmore/junior year) and she is 10 times more mature than me

Always wants to talk about politics and injustice in 3rd world countires when I want to talk about Subway vs Quizzno's and how overrated Paul Rudd is

Kinda weird, but its a summer thing, nothing more, and these type of situations have a way of working themselves out

6/9/2009 4:08:05 PM

Quote :

"go to beach as much as possible, go out as much as possible,"

Quote :

"Our conversation is just limited. I don't want to talk about politics and religion all the time...but sometimes I like having a conversation on a higher level intellectually."

sorry, but you made it sound like she doesn't have much of a higher level intellect.

and having a stable family doesn't mean you can't be interesting.

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 4:30 PM. Reason : dsdf]

6/9/2009 4:29:05 PM

my wife is 3 years and some change younger than me. (she would have been a freshman when i was a senior)

6/9/2009 4:30:01 PM

my friend is 29 and engaged to a 21 year old. it works out very well for them.

6/9/2009 4:30:45 PM

My girlfriend and I have the same exact birthday. She is just two years younger. Easy to remember but fucking lame to have to share your birthday.

6/9/2009 4:35:33 PM

Quote :

"sorry, but you made it sound like she doesn't have much of a higher level intellect. and having a stable family doesn't mean you can't be interesting. "

She's just trying to have "a year off" before she gets to the grind of trying to find a 9-5. Something I wish I had done. So can't fault her for that.

I used the stable family as a reason why I had to grow up faster than normal...an example of maybe why I'm a little bit more mature. I didn't say anything about her not being interesting. The girl I dated before her was 32 and had lived in Mexico, Chicago, Seattle, and San Diego...and has held jobs that range from being a marketing analyst to a wine rep. So of course she has more to talk about and might be more "interesting" than a 22 year old fresh out of a college. It has a lot more to do with your experience than your age...but your age and how you grew up can affect that.

6/9/2009 4:39:59 PM

The girl i'm seeing is 19 while i'm 24 (5 yr difference).

After graduating I did not think i'd date someone that much younger than me but it really has worked out good. Really has not been issue with a "maturity gap" only what i'd call an "experience gap." She drinks and goes out to parties but does not have that omg we are in college we gotta go out every night, get drunk all the time, and gossip post-high school mindset a lot of chicks have (especially sorostitutes).
Only real thing problem with her age is that she can't go to the bars which is what being 21+ all my friends go. So its usually one or the other on a given weekend night.

Seems like most girls my age down here in Wilmington are sluts, tourists, or are looking for the ring if not already married. Dating someone younger keeps me in the college loop and does not carry the same 'expectations' an older chick would have about serious shit.

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 7:08 PM. Reason : k]

6/9/2009 6:59:20 PM

My current GF is 6 years older than me. She is 36 and I am 30

She is the first girl I have ever dated that was older than me though. Before her, I dated chicks that were typically 4 years younger.

And trust me, I wish I had started dating older chicks sooner. It is fucking fantastic.

6/9/2009 7:06:45 PM

^why is it fantastic?

6/9/2009 7:10:09 PM

mainly because of her maturity and independence, qualities I have never had in a significant other up until this point.

oh yeah, and the sex is phenomenal.

6/9/2009 7:11:37 PM

Yeah, my guy is 8 years older than me and I will never date someone my age again, older men FTW.

6/9/2009 7:12:21 PM

so you are already planning for the break-up?

6/9/2009 7:13:55 PM

My SO is four days younger than me

[Edited on June 9, 2009 at 7:19 PM. Reason : can't do math]

6/9/2009 7:18:46 PM

the youngest i've ever dated was eight hours older than me

6/9/2009 7:34:30 PM

haha of course not but thinking of my dating history made me realize the benefits of dating an older man and they far outweigh dating someone my age. I'll be pretty shocked if we break up actually.

6/9/2009 7:39:54 PM

I always thought I would marry someone younger than I am, even though I don't care about age.

My ex-gf (only true gf) was 4 yrs and 9 months younger.

My wife is 3 yrs, 3 months, and 3 days older than I.

6/9/2009 8:04:24 PM

1 month 1 day younger. Makes remembering birthdays much easier.

6/9/2009 8:22:25 PM

He's 4 years and about 3 months older than me

<3 older men

They have their shit together.

6/9/2009 8:30:48 PM