If you can get drunk and not cause any problems, more power to you. If you get drunk and need to break things, steal things, fight, or even just scream and make a lot of noise for no apparent reason(ladies), you need to quit drinking, because alcohol makes you a Giant Fucking Douche. Thank you. Now, if you will excuse me, I will return to my cave and continue my TWW lurking properly.

2/18/2011 12:04:58 AM

i resent this thread

[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 12:07 AM. Reason : i am, also, currently a little drunk]

2/18/2011 12:07:09 AM

I agree wholeheartedly with the above statements.

GrumpyGOP loves to drink. This is not a secret. However, I have not once broken things (at least intentionally -- and rarely unintentionally), started a fight, stolen anything, or screamed. I abhor people who do. They give normal drinkers a bad name.

My parents always had a saying along the lines of, "When you drink, you show who you really are." The people I associate with are really chill and, at worst, overly talkative. But we have all witnessed others who can't help but start some variation of shit. They are not to be abided.

2/18/2011 12:09:01 AM

Workin on it

2/18/2011 12:16:37 AM

dsheif

2/18/2011 12:21:42 AM

I concur.

2/18/2011 12:30:24 AM

you rang???

2/18/2011 12:30:38 AM

A+++ advice thread

2/18/2011 12:32:34 AM

fracksunickel

2/18/2011 12:39:32 AM

Once in college I broke a coffee table while drunk.

The next day I went to the store and bought Steve a new one. Restitution was a success and it has not happened since.

2/18/2011 12:43:36 AM

when i get drunk i usually set fire to the neighbors goats.

2/18/2011 1:08:45 AM

i'm a pretty mellow drunk

2/18/2011 1:10:10 AM

LP78 is an entertaining drunk


not as entertaining as the rectangle however

[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 1:15 AM. Reason : rectangle ]

2/18/2011 1:14:40 AM

Quote :

"GrumpyGOP: My parents always had a saying along the lines of, "When you drink, you show who you really are." The people I associate with are really chill and, at worst, overly talkative. But we have all witnessed others who can't help but start some variation of shit. They are not to be abided."

1. This is wrong.
2. What a strange thing to teach to your kid.
3. Seriously, very strange. Did your parents hang out in bars a lot? Spend a lot of time with drunks?
4. You're a total asshole even when you're sober. But congrats on not breaking things or being loud when you're drunk...

[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 1:28 AM. Reason : ]

2/18/2011 1:24:21 AM

ITT bridget gets uppity about someone elses childhood.

2/18/2011 1:28:00 AM

so, have BridgetSPK and GrumpyGOP slept together/ dated? It would certainly appear that way

2/18/2011 1:28:41 AM

^^Fine. We'll just leave it to number 4.

2/18/2011 1:29:06 AM

Quote :

"My parents always had a saying along the lines of, "When you drink, you show who you really are.""

Lessons from the Charlie Sheen school of parenting.

2/18/2011 1:29:44 AM

damn some judgemental puritans ITT.

i think it's a pretty accurate observation. and could be entirely appropriate to tell a older child or teenager depending on context..

perhaps there was someone in their neighborhood who was a chronic drunk who became a violent asshole. and then young Grumps has to compare and contrast the drunken bastard to his sweet grandma who passed out on her third glass of sherry every night

so it could be a totally appropriate thing to tell a kid. i think i'll tell the same thing to my kid.

2/18/2011 1:36:34 AM

I feel like I can't say anything on TWW anymore without looking like I'm crazy or obsessed.

So I take it back. GrumpyGOP, I never should have suggested that you have behavioral problems even when you're sober. Your post was a spot on appraisal of drunks and drunkenness. When it comes to social norms and etiquette, you are clearly a voice of authority on TWW.

2/18/2011 1:38:50 AM

you are forgiven.

now, bow and back out slowly towards the door. do not turn around until you have completely exited.

2/18/2011 1:42:11 AM

Quote :

"damn some judgemental puritans ITT"

pot meet kettle, at least in respect to the judgmental part

and yes, saying "when you drink, you show who you really are" to a child is a terrible idea regardless of your opinion on alcohol consumption.

2/18/2011 1:47:28 AM

so you can tell your kids that being drunk is an acceptable excuse for acting like a shit head ... or... maybe you can just pretend alcohol doesnt exist and therefore there are no problems relating to its overuse.

i'm sure you'll be a brilliant parent.

2/18/2011 1:59:22 AM

yeah that's totally what I said, neither of those are straw men

2/18/2011 2:02:27 AM

during my entire childhood my parents told me that no son of theirs would ever be a "two beer queer" and i turned out fine.

2/18/2011 2:05:34 AM

Quote :

"not as entertaining as the rectangle however "

*snort*

i hope that is referencing who i think it is

2/18/2011 2:15:22 AM

When I was a kid my grandfather told me I would be a Scotch drinker, because:

"Scotch drinkers never get drunk. People think they must, but they don't. A true scotch drinker knows how to work a glass. He moves about the room (grandpa must have been a party machine), he mingles, he talks, and all the while he's sipping from his glass--but that is his glass. It stays in his hand. He doesn't empty it. He respects the Scotch. You will be a Scotch drinker."

And goddamnit I'm... not yet a scotch drinker fuck. I'm letting my grandpa down.






*also my parents didn't really drink.

Except on Christmas morning.

Because nothing says the birth of Jesus our Lord and savior like a Bloody Mary.

2/18/2011 2:21:22 AM

Look, I don't have a problem with people drinking at all (I'm drinking a beer right now) but telling a child "when you drink, you show who you really are" is basically telling them "you can't be who you really are unless you're drinking" which is textbook alcoholism/addiction.

[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 2:28 AM. Reason : .]

2/18/2011 2:27:20 AM

I am drunk.

2/18/2011 5:06:53 AM

my mom taught me something similar
"a drunk mans words are a sober man's thoughts"




and i wanna be a scotch drinker too netstorm, im working on it


[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 7:37 AM. Reason : -->

2/18/2011 7:33:59 AM

i too, was 18 once

2/18/2011 7:59:54 AM

^^ i wanna do that cept with barely wines

I only drink scotch when i'm with a VP, President or CEO that also does.


and real scotch drinkers are drunk all the time they just know how to handle themselves.


[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 8:05 AM. Reason : .]

2/18/2011 8:05:17 AM

Quote :

"and yes, saying "when you drink, you show who you really are" to a child is a terrible idea regardless of your opinion on alcohol consumption."

god damn ya'll are some assuming pricks. what part of Grumpy's post does he say his parents told him that when he was a child. i don't know about you all, but my parents had very candid conversations with me about drinking, drugs and sex when i was of the appropriate age. its not like they taught Grumpy lessons on drinking when he was 6....FUCK!

2/18/2011 8:15:58 AM

My mom and stepdad basically taught me the same thing as GrumpyGOP and Joie - alcohol is truth serum, a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts, drinking will bring out someone's true colors, etc....

Then again, they worked with drunk people almost every night, and I think they were trying to get the point across that you can't blame drinking on your bad manners or situations.

2/18/2011 8:46:22 AM

I'm a pretty chill drunk. I usually just get uber excited about the game I'm playing or book(s) I'm reading and want to talk about those all night. Plus I prefer to get wasted at a house/domicile than out at a bar

2/18/2011 8:57:59 AM

but we all went fucking insane when we drank 4lokos

2/18/2011 9:01:56 AM

i don't ever recall my parents having a discussion with me regarding the effects of alcohol. the physical and legal consequences, yeah sure. but i don't think they ever tried to relay how it can make you act. I think those things were learned by trial and error and I consider myself a well managed drunk.

2/18/2011 9:07:50 AM

Quote :

"telling a child "when you drink, you show who you really are" is basically telling them "you can't be who you really are unless you're drinking" which is textbook alcoholism/addiction."

goddamn.... really? that's what you think? are you that incompetent?

naw, wait a minute.... i get it. you just in here clowning, ain't ya?







[Edited on February 18, 2011 at 10:44 AM. Reason : ]

2/18/2011 10:41:56 AM

i'm not just saying this cause i'm drunk

2/18/2011 10:42:03 AM

Quote :

""telling a child "when you drink, you show who you really are" is basically telling them "you can't be who you really are unless you're drinking" which is textbook alcoholism/addiction.""

its not alcoholism/addiction. it's called knocking down the many social barriers that exist today that prevent you from divulging certain information to certain personnel.

2/18/2011 10:51:44 AM

Quote :

"I hate drunk people and I hate sober people and I hate all people today And I hate short people And I hate tall people And I hate all people today Cuz I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day I hate horny people And I hate corny people And I hate all people today And I hate dumb people and I hate smart people and I hate all people today And I hate my boss BBQ sauce I just toss them all away Cuz I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day Like a child being chased by a monster I will never go away I close my eyes and hope for bright tomorrow I wanna be alone, I wanna be alone Cuz I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Cuz I'm havin' a bad day I'm havin' a bad day Havin' a bad day get out of my way Yeah get out of my way"

2/18/2011 12:00:59 PM

Quote :

"telling a child "when you drink, you show who you really are" is basically telling them "you can't be who you really are unless you're drinking" which is textbook alcoholism/addiction."

This is one of the dumbest things that I've ever read.

2/18/2011 3:59:28 PM