Here is a very rough cut of part of a short film my buddies are making back in NC. The audio is not perfect yet, and this is not a finished film yet nor is it finished being edited yet, but I figured Id see what TWW thought of it. The production values are actually pretty decent.

The premise is that its a dark comedy about an insane cops first day on the job. He is basically insane and obsessed with fighting crime and corruption, no matter how petty.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yt218P7awTI&feature=youtu.be

6/7/2011 6:27:06 AM

I think its pretty awful.

6/7/2011 7:10:26 AM

I am an audio post production mixer and sound designer

perhaps he would like to enlist my services?

6/7/2011 7:43:26 AM

It's a cool first effort. The camara work needs a lot of work. Very little of an actual story...

The lowest point is the acting of the main actor, which is just terrible and silly.

High point is the acting of the partner which shows a lot of promise. Some of the pacing was surprisingly good.

...

also, the production quality is surprisingly high... that's awesome and a testament to the technology being cheaply and easily available today

[Edited on June 7, 2011 at 11:18 AM. Reason : .]

6/7/2011 11:11:10 AM

not the audio production quality - a LOT of the dialog is off mic

and the VO narration sounds like it was recorded with an omni-directional mic near an indoor swimming pool

I'm guessing that this was shot using ONLY a camera mounted mic - maybe the built-in stereo mic on some of the Panasonic cameras or the onboard sound on a Canon 7D

^ why haven't we worked together?

6/7/2011 1:30:37 PM

Quote :

"The lowest point is the acting of the main actor, which is just terrible and silly."

I think he was going for an over the top Clint Eastwoodesque performance.

6/7/2011 5:33:08 PM

and I think it was terrible.

6/7/2011 9:52:12 PM

fair enough

6/7/2011 9:54:27 PM

wow, the main acting is pretty fucking terrible. the partner has a lot of potential though.

6/7/2011 9:56:11 PM

Quote :

"^ why haven't we worked together?"

I don't really do this kind of stuff. I just like movies. You don't really have to do a thing to critique it... that's the nastiness of it.

6/7/2011 10:04:14 PM

had to stop it at like 30 secs. hopefully audio will get fixed. but didn't like the shaking of the camera nor the color...

6/7/2011 11:03:32 PM

I like how you can see they're just sitting there in the dude's raybans

sweet green shirt, camera guy!

6/7/2011 11:10:14 PM

That was a pretty good first try, but it definitely needs work. The camera work is okay, the cameraman reflection isn't a huge deal. The main character's overacting isn't a huge deal either, as it's very obviously intentional. The single biggest spot-repair that could be done is the audio. The audio quality deteriorates a lot throughout the film, especially in the convenience store.

6/7/2011 11:21:13 PM

The main character's overacting is one of the biggest problems here. In fact, I'm not even sure it's the acting ability (which probably still is not so great) but the way the character is portrayed. I think they should have went with insane stoicism punctuated by outburst. Instead, they went with wide-eyed quivering nonsense.

Another big problem is that it's so short... with very little story. I mean what exactly is happening? Exposition, man. Maybe these three or so scenes (in under seven minutes?) can be expanded or elaborated on.

...

You need to tell your friends to keep it up. The fact that we're talking about it, that we give a shit enough to sit here and discuss it, is big kudos on them.

[Edited on June 7, 2011 at 11:51 PM. Reason : .]

6/7/2011 11:35:15 PM

Overacting, Like a Boss!

6/7/2011 11:50:35 PM

That main character keeps making his lips look like Kevin from the office. I keep expecting to hear his voice.

Main characheter awful. His partner, worked for me.

Also how do you just borrow an rpd cruiser? I want to do that

6/7/2011 11:52:07 PM

Yeah, everyone is crushing on the partner, man.

Is he a professional actor?

6/7/2011 11:53:17 PM

Also, duck face.

6/7/2011 11:55:33 PM

best part.

"Fringe benefits man"
"no, its CORRUPTION"

6/7/2011 11:56:18 PM

The main character sounds like the Soviet Apocalypse Tank driver in RA2.

6/7/2011 11:57:26 PM

Quote :

"Another big problem is that it's so short... with very little story. I mean what exactly is happening? Exposition, man. Maybe these three or so scenes (in under seven minutes?) can be expanded or elaborated on."

That was my biggest problem too. This isnt the final film according to my buddy, and he said they shot a lot more film for exposition, but the editing wasnt done well at all.

6/8/2011 12:19:34 AM

there was a lot more shot for this, and I believe all of it was done on a 5D

I'm the hippy in the back of a patrol car. And we didn't get an RPD cruiser, but we did get a police vehicle, but I can't say what.

The main character is a rad dude, this was all shot very quickly and I think maybe we could have made a few different character choices. Partner is a super nice and funny guy, he does comedy around the area, if people are crushing on him, his group does an improvised musical once or twice a month.

6/8/2011 11:21:31 AM

Quote :

"The fact that we're talking about it, that we give a shit enough to sit here and discuss it, is big kudos on them."

Yeah, don't let the critique be mistaken as hate.
It is better than my first attempt.

I can give great advice on professional audio techniques (for free) and suggest useful books if they would like... the kind of audio that I heard in this short really can't be fixed satisfactorily in post-production - proper technique should be employed during production to ensure the best quality recording and audio post should be used to touch up vox and wild track, create atmosphere, add foley effects, score, etc.

6/8/2011 11:48:20 AM

Why did they remove the video?

If you're going to be making films you can't go get butt hurt about every little thing. Hater's gonna hate - that's for sure.

If you don't want it public I suggest putting a password on it.

6/8/2011 11:50:45 AM

I don't think it was removed due to butthurt.

I'd expect another version up soon, I think. These guys don't give a shit about getting notes and criticism.

6/8/2011 12:01:01 PM

its cool that they don't get butt hurt - takes a thick skin to put yourself out there as an artist

but they're not interested in getting notes?
that's just foolish

6/8/2011 12:25:29 PM

No, I mean they don't get offended when notes aren't sunshine and rainbows. Of course notes are valuable.

Video will be on vimeo shortly

6/8/2011 12:40:09 PM

word

well I live in Raleigh and I'd be glad to show them what I know

6/8/2011 12:46:43 PM

Quote :

"Partner is a super nice and funny guy, he does comedy around the area, if people are crushing on him, his group does an improvised musical once or twice a month."

He should think about doing something a bit more serious. Like moving to LA and trying to get an agent or start going to casting calls.

6/8/2011 12:53:23 PM

Corruption

6/8/2011 2:46:01 PM

I think it turned out very well. Minus the rough editing and sound.

6/8/2011 3:06:12 PM

^ I think that's what we call a discussion ending sentence. You need to ball up and critique your friends' work, man.

That is they need to re-shoot with thought about how to portray the main character correctly and correct their audio situation, at the very least.

[Edited on June 9, 2011 at 12:53 AM. Reason : .]

6/9/2011 12:53:31 AM

There was a very cool scene where he graduated from the academy that was written initially, but didn't end up getting shot. It definitely could be refined into the exposition folks are looking for.

tww being openminded itt

6/9/2011 1:39:46 AM