I stupidly woke up and actually answered the door wiithout thinking. Took me 20 mins to get rid of those fags. Now they will be back Tuesday. Good thing I have class.

Post your mormon moron stories ITT

9/4/2011 5:56:29 PM

Let them in, act interested give the girl the eyes then bang her 2 days later.

I'm Krallum and I approved this message

9/4/2011 6:01:39 PM

why didn't you just like... close the door

9/4/2011 6:04:00 PM

This one time I was going to get married in California, where I had plans all set up, a free place to stay, and everything. Then the mormon church put a whole lot of money into overturning the law that allowed that. Ended up having to change plans on the fly and get married in Boston instead. LOL, those mormons!

9/4/2011 6:04:31 PM

I give these kids a weird look and then politely told them god is not real.

Didn't work! I think they want to save me.

I gave him the wrong number and a bad time. Now I hope they wreck on the way back. When did churches started targeting student apt complexes? That shit is annoying!

[Edited on September 4, 2011 at 6:08 PM. Reason : ...]

9/4/2011 6:04:58 PM

i had a similar situation happen once

i was in the middle of streaming creampie pornography to my samsung television when i heard my doorbell. i answered the call of the mormon and invited them in to participate in group sex.

they were cool with it

9/4/2011 6:08:53 PM

i, too, wake up at 5:56pm on Sundays

9/4/2011 6:13:37 PM

Quote :

"BlackJesus (5:54) : so some mormon morons just woke me up"

took me 2 mins to collect my thoughts

9/4/2011 6:14:48 PM

I don't mind talking with the mormons, at least they (normally) have a bit of knowledge of the gospel.

Though their argument for the book of Mormon is very thin.

9/4/2011 7:03:29 PM

I don't want to talk to any religious nut jobs. I like to waste their time and give em the wrong numberr

9/4/2011 7:12:14 PM

I'll tell them they are going to hell for worshipping a false god.

9/4/2011 7:36:10 PM

I dated a mormon once

and took his virginity

9/4/2011 7:41:19 PM

I bet that was the worst dick you ever got

9/4/2011 7:42:26 PM

we parted ways on mutual terms after maintaining a relationship his parents were against from the start

he made up for it later

9/4/2011 7:44:57 PM

Solution: Say "fuck off" and slam the door. Easy as pie.

9/4/2011 7:46:17 PM

Well the basis for their argument is that Christ gave the apostles a specific command and authority, which could not be exercised with Apostolic succession (similar to Catholics). However, the Mormons think that Paul, Peter and John came down and spoke to Joseph Smith (as angels, which makes no sense), and gave him apostolic authority.

However, their failure is taking a faith based salvation and attempting to make it a works based salvation. After all, how can a religious group get power unless the individual needs to rely on them for salvation?

9/4/2011 7:51:23 PM

Quote :

"Dum, dum, dum, dum, dum"

9/4/2011 7:52:45 PM

^His parents were against him sleeping with a slut? Who would of thought!

9/4/2011 8:07:35 PM

actually, our relationship lasted ~2 years

old school mormons do not approve of relationships outside of the mormon religion

I was referencing my opinion on his religious standings (I am catholic)

9/4/2011 8:12:15 PM

Mormon fucker!

9/4/2011 8:17:02 PM

Once these morman high school boys came to our apartment to talk and I started hitting on them. Then my roommate came to the door without any pants on for some reason. When I told them I was content with my current religious beliefs, they left without hesitation. They were pretty cute too all dressed up in their suits.

9/4/2011 8:20:05 PM

how was your response not

oh, you're mormons? good luck with that... not for me... laters

9/4/2011 10:39:59 PM

i didnt read much in this thread but the mormons did kill my friends dog

they rang the door bell when the dog was up stairs and the dog jumped down the entire flight of stairs at them and it broke its neck

he blames the mormons and hates them more than the average mormon hater

9/4/2011 10:49:53 PM

My father once let a group of mormons in and talked to them for 2 hours

9/4/2011 10:58:49 PM

I try to be nice to people that show up at my door. And since they woke me up and wasted 10 mins of my time I will waste their time when they try to come back.

Fucking religious nut jobs. I like sex therefore I cannot be mormon

9/4/2011 11:06:48 PM

Mormons believe that Native Americans are God's chosen people and that they somehow arrived here from Israel.......

9/4/2011 11:44:36 PM

is it more crazy than everything else?

[Edited on September 4, 2011 at 11:56 PM. Reason : < > all the same]

9/4/2011 11:54:40 PM

^nope

9/5/2011 12:20:42 AM

lately i keep getting guys coming up asking if i need lawn care done or if they can take away the gutters that are laying in the yard.

gutter story: our landlord had almost all the gutters removed and so they just sit over by a fence out of view. two seperate men have come asking if they can have it to take away to the dump.

9/5/2011 1:44:33 AM

sounds like you're "that house" that blights the neighborhood.

9/5/2011 9:37:59 AM

I have convinced myself that all religious people are crazy. The one thing I remember from my mormon encounter is that they told me the earth was 2000 years old.

Do people really believe this shit?

9/5/2011 10:54:05 AM

If you live in a student apartment, getting rid of these people should have been as easy as having beer cans strewn about. And, ideally, a cigarette dangling from your mouth. I light up every time I see those weirdos approaching, it's worked so far.

9/5/2011 11:38:26 AM

Quote :

"Well the basis for their argument is that Christ gave the apostles a specific command and authority, which could not be exercised with Apostolic succession (similar to Catholics). However, the Mormons think that Paul, Peter and John came down and spoke to Joseph Smith (as angels, which makes no sense), and gave him apostolic authority. "

Where do you get off saying that Mormon's beliefs don't make sense, when in the very previous sentence you're referring to a religion that believes a god and angels exist, yet in the next sentence you criticize another "sect" for believing angels came down and spoke to some guy and gave him authority? God damn, how many times did angels and shit come down and talk to moses?

9/5/2011 11:54:08 AM

i'll take the mormons over those kids selling magazines.

9/5/2011 11:55:56 AM

More room in heaven for us, boys.

9/5/2011 12:06:01 PM

Quote :

"Where do you get off saying that Mormon's beliefs don't make sense, when in the very previous sentence you're referring to a religion that believes a god and angels exist, yet in the next sentence you criticize another "sect" for believing angels came down and spoke to some guy and gave him authority?"

Problem is Mormons believe in scripture absolutely, I've talked with them before and they have a pretty good understanding. The idea that angels can be people is completely false within scripture. By their own views this does not make sense. Angels are a different type of creature and set in their own hierarchy apart from man. Man does not die and become an angel.

9/5/2011 1:45:10 PM

I used to live in a 'mormon training neighborhood' and dealt with these fine individuals a number of times...My best time for rebuffing them is 15 seconds. Answer the door with no shirt, slayer blasting, and chicken blood on your hands, chest, and face.

9/5/2011 2:18:34 PM