As stolen from SA.

What do you do that could be considered bachelor as fuck?

I just introduced another tdubber to the concept of the showerbeer, which is a religious experience involving a hot shower and an ice cold beer.

As far as living in bachelor squalor goes (I'm a pro at this), I've got something of an ant problem. I regularly toss some french bread pizzas into the toaster oven just to kill off all the little fuckers that are swarming on whatever crumbs they can find in the bottom of the thing. The other counters are clean and so on, I figure this is just like a dual purpose food-making ant trap.

9/15/2011 6:52:05 PM

bike mounted on the living room wall

only put clothes away when it is very very necessary (never)

eat over the sink

...

9/15/2011 6:55:51 PM

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/foul-bachelor-frog

9/15/2011 6:59:06 PM

-recliner in front of 60" HDTV

-bottom dresser drawer next to bed just for condoms and video camera remote

-hidden video camera in the closet pointed at the bed

-xbox360 remote, wii remote, PS3 remote, TV remote, receiver remote, cable remote....all on the coffee table in front of the couch

9/15/2011 7:00:54 PM

you need dat harmony son


I got busted by chick Y when she saw chick Xs earings on the windowsill by the bed the next morning. Does that count?

[Edited on September 15, 2011 at 7:11 PM. Reason : .]

[Edited on September 15, 2011 at 7:15 PM. Reason : .]

9/15/2011 7:11:07 PM

Mindstorm Insight Pest Solutions.

Also, "Wine from the bottle with no a/c or pants on."

9/15/2011 7:13:45 PM

I wash all my panties and bras in the bathroom sink and hang them on the shower curtain rail, I leave them up for days or until I wear them

9/15/2011 7:21:10 PM

ethernet cables precariously stretched across floors

9/15/2011 7:21:52 PM

laptop permanently stationed on coffee table next to various remotes

tv and ps3 on old coffee table

my 3 bedrooms:
#1 has a bed in it and clean clothes on the floor
#2 has a desk and a bunch of shit in it
#3 has my spare set of wheels, hard top, tools, extra tv, and a bunch of shit in it

9/15/2011 7:37:34 PM

I'm completely satisfied with a meal consisting of ham and swiss doobies dunked in mayo

9/15/2011 8:36:03 PM

The crusty butt ends of hotpockets that never cook right in the microwave left on paper plates on the coffee table next to the xobox controller.

9/15/2011 9:04:20 PM

Dishes go from dishwasher to use to sink to dishwasher and repeat. Same concept for clothes.

9/15/2011 9:05:52 PM

Most meals are eaten either on the couch or over the sink.

9/15/2011 9:09:14 PM

Quote :

"only put clothes away when it is very very necessary (never) eat over the sink "

i do this. does that make me a single dude?

fuck folding clothes and using plates though. wtf is the point. i also never make my bed. i just sleep on top of the comforter or if i bother getting under it (maybe in the winter) it stays crumpled up all over the bed until it comes time to wash it

9/15/2011 9:36:55 PM

rooms in my house that had nothing in them, so i just kept the doors shut

at one point, my garage and driveway contained: Honda S2000, Corvette Z06, Dodge Ram, BMW R100RT and Suzuki SV650 motorcycles, and GP1300R Waverunner.

When I first bought my last house, the stove was jetted for natural gas, but the house had propane. It created a giant, smelly inferno if you turned it on. I didn't bother to get it fixed for over a year, hahaha. i eventually wanted to be able to cook frozen pizzas..

i had a huge bonus room in my house with nothing in it but guitars, amplifiers, and a pile of issued combat gear

9/15/2011 10:26:54 PM

I'm a big goddamn fan of weekends where I just cook lazy meals (eggs/PB&J/frozen pizza/mac & cheese) and never have to go outside of the house or put pants on or anything. Beer and videogames and food for company.

9/15/2011 10:36:56 PM

^Those are the best days.

And I also do the shower beer...it's not quite a "religious experience" for me though.

9/15/2011 10:39:32 PM

No more clean socks? Buy more socks.

Same concept for underwear, dishes, etc.

I've thrown away more clothing than most people own.

9/15/2011 10:44:57 PM

^^ It really only approaches "religious experience" territory when you seriously need a shower and are thirsty as shit. The combination just satisfies all your needs at once and results in instant happiness.

9/15/2011 10:46:50 PM

hahaha, I remember back in college....

my girlfriend at the time brought her best friend over because we were going to go to a party later that night. I'm sitting on the futon in my room, watching TV.... the girls are in my bathroom doing their makeup. The best friend spots an empty beer bottle sitting on the sink counter, and I hear her say "ugh...what is that even doing in here?!?!?!"



BECAUSE I WAS DRINKING A BEER, AND NEEDED TO TAKE A SHIT! SO... I ENDED UP TAKING A SHIT WHILE DRINKING A BEER! DUH!



[Edited on September 15, 2011 at 10:57 PM. Reason : s]

9/15/2011 10:51:49 PM

^haha, I've done the same. My bathroom trashcan frequently has a beer can/bottle in it.

9/15/2011 10:54:33 PM

^ Or not wanting to put down the beer while taking a piss.

Happens more often than not for me.

9/15/2011 10:54:36 PM

Quote :

"No more clean socks? Buy more socks. Same concept for underwear, dishes, etc. I've thrown away more clothing than most people own."

OMG YES....I know I'm not a dude, but I do some bachelor shit all the time

I have thrown away so many food containers because I don't feel like cleaning them out/left them in the fridge too long

I have some baking sheets in my sink right now that need to be washed, and I keep asking myself if I should throw them away since I have 3 more in my cabinets

I'm so tempted

9/15/2011 11:01:32 PM

About once every 6 months I throw away a garbage bag of clothing. I have probably 30 white and light blue dress shirts because I don't like doing laundry, I should probably get rid of some of them now that I don't have to wear them to work anymore. Ditto for ties.

9/15/2011 11:04:46 PM

lol nice

9/15/2011 11:17:18 PM

I don't have curtains in my room...just a dark sheet pinned up with thumb tacks. It started as something I did on the weekends since it gets so bright in my room in the morning. But then I just got lazy and now it stays up all the time. It's pitch dark in my room at night always...I love it.

[Edited on September 15, 2011 at 11:31 PM. Reason : ]

9/15/2011 11:24:11 PM

Quote :

"It's pitch dark in my room at night"

unless you're in like Alaska...I'd hope this is true without the sheet lol

9/15/2011 11:25:58 PM

^street lights FTL

9/15/2011 11:28:16 PM

Quote :

"No more clean socks? Buy more socks. Same concept for underwear, dishes, etc."

LMFAO......I always do that, t-shirts too.

this thread is full of bachelor awesomeness. if and when i grow out of this (in my 50s perhaps) then maybe ill get married. freedom is way better than a honey-fucking-do list.

9/15/2011 11:30:44 PM

Quote :

"unless you're in like Alaska...I'd hope this is true without the sheet lol"

Haha, I changed it...I meant it's always pitch dark in my room.

And ^^, yes, street lights suck

9/15/2011 11:32:27 PM

chair close to the front door has clothes tossed all over it from when I walk into the apartment and strip down to get comfortable.

Just being able to walk around naked

Cooking whatever the fuck I want to eat and eating it on whatever (if anything) I want.

9/16/2011 7:55:45 AM

Odd combinations of food based upon what you have left in the cupboards/fridge and you are too lazy to go get something more appropriate. One time I was gonna make sloppy joes but I couldn't find any mix so I just threw a bunch of leftover teriyaki marinade on some ground beef. My burger buns ended up having mold on them so I put it in hot dog buns and had it with a side of pita bread and hummus, hahaha.


Also, I can't remember what comedian I heard say this but he said at one point all his dishes were dirty so he was eating cereal off of a plate with a spatula.

9/16/2011 9:05:01 AM

Quote :

"BACHELOR AS FUCK"

9/16/2011 9:14:08 AM

Quote :

"chair close to the front door has clothes tossed all over it from when I walk into the apartment and strip down to get comfortable."

Everyday when I get home, I immediately take off my tie and dress shirt and hang them over the recliner or on the banister.

9/16/2011 9:16:07 AM

i just buy shit and drop the shopping bags in the living room until I feel like I need to see what's inside

it's like my fucking birthday sometimes when I discover what i bought 3 months ago

9/16/2011 9:18:52 AM

Like most of you, I hate folding clothes. So after a load of laundry I just keep the laundry basket of clean clothes in the middle of the floor until I finally decide to fold it. At which point I'll dump the clean clothes on my bed, forcing me to actually try to fold them (st a later time, of course). Then at night I'll just push the pile off my bed onto the floor and the vicious cycle continues.

9/16/2011 9:23:38 AM

-Eat every meal off the coffee table
-bedroom floor has dirty clothes all over the place
-video game stuff (rock band instruments, racing game steering wheel/pedals) scattered about the bedroom
-walls lined with boxes, some of those boxes used for furniture

9/16/2011 9:28:16 AM

Quote :

"I have some baking sheets in my sink right now that need to be washed, and I keep asking myself if I should throw them away since I have 3 more in my cabinets"

lulz I just end up putting tin foil on top of it and then cooking on that. After baking/cooking, remove tin foil and store in the oven until needed again.

9/16/2011 9:29:36 AM

i do not own a couch or a tv

come to my place and you can relax on an ab ball, inversion table or incline bench, all of which take up the living room space around the shopping bags!

9/16/2011 9:30:04 AM

Ah, bygone days for me...but at the time (4 years ago now) I would do several of these regularly. Particularly the never putting clothes away part--I had a dirty pile and a clean pile. The sink would continually be full of dirty dishes and I didn't have a dishwasher--so sometimes what I cooked would be determined by what I could make without having to wash a pan/utensil/dish.

I'd eat on the couch pretty much exclusively (as I had no room for a kitchen or dining room table) but I wasn't down with eating over the sink. I want to be seated and enjoy my meal/snack, not stand over a sink. If there were no clean plates I'd hold my snack/sandwich/whatever on a paper towel or two.

9/16/2011 9:34:50 AM

- not having cable or a digital antenna because I only used my TV for gaming and watched all my shows on Hulu

- leaving clean clothes in the hamper until I've worn every item of clothing except for one or two and then folding those

- hardly ever cleaning/organizing my papers, clothes, and books because I had a one bedroom off Falls of Neuse and everyone I knew lived in central raleigh and didn't want to drive out to see me

9/16/2011 9:35:12 AM

Quote :

"Like most of you, I hate folding clothes. So after a load of laundry I just keep the laundry basket of clean clothes in the middle of the floor until I finally decide to fold it. At which point I'll dump the clean clothes on my bed, forcing me to actually try to fold them (st a later time, of course). Then at night I'll just push the pile off my bed onto the floor and the vicious cycle continues."

it's like you read my mind. except my clothes usually go straight from the dryer to the top of my bed, and then the floor that same night where they will ultimately end up staying because there's no chance in hell they are getting folded.

another TBM (total bachelor move): fuck an iron, just put clothes in the dryer to remove wrinkles

9/16/2011 11:33:23 AM

If my girlfriend wasn't living with me, I can guarantee you that the bed would never be made

9/16/2011 11:36:00 AM

foul bachelor frog is hilarious

9/16/2011 11:52:06 AM

Quote :

"fuck an iron, just put clothes in the dryer to remove wrinkles"

haha, definitely.

9/16/2011 11:57:00 AM

i do all of this shit and have a live in gf

yall just need to up your game

[Edited on September 16, 2011 at 12:01 PM. Reason : except for you filthy people with ants and mold]

9/16/2011 12:01:18 PM

shit, i think my live in gf is more of a bachelor than i am.

9/16/2011 12:03:31 PM

ikr, same boat

9/16/2011 12:04:11 PM

i think you guys are liars and pussies, dnl

9/16/2011 12:06:01 PM

last night she watched football, on the couch, looking at one of the two computers on the coffee table (that haven't left in months), while eating chicken wings and drinking beer from a can. she had been doing some laundry, and piled it on the unmade bed. so when it was bed time she just threw it all that shit onto the dresser. my 62" tv's entertainment center broke when i moved, she bought a new one from ikea and it's sat in the box in front of the tv (that's sitting on the ground) for over a week. (not one of those passive aggressive moves to get me to put it together, but more of a "fuck it" type move).

made multiple facebook posts about the joys of an outdoor shower beer at the beach.

basically everything in this thread except for the uncleanliness parts are par for the course in my abode.

[Edited on September 16, 2011 at 12:10 PM. Reason : e ]

9/16/2011 12:09:32 PM