If you gotta poop, go poop!

10/13/2011 9:23:54 AM

You are a jerk

10/13/2011 9:25:05 AM

asshole

[Edited on October 13, 2011 at 9:25 AM. Reason : i say that to the dog]

10/13/2011 9:25:30 AM

SHUT UP

10/13/2011 9:26:49 AM

Noooo.... Noooo... I see you! Stop that!

10/13/2011 9:27:32 AM

"What's that? You want mama to take you out?"

10/13/2011 9:30:08 AM

Quote :

"Come sit in daddy's lap"

10/13/2011 9:30:42 AM

Quote :

"yes....yes.... Thats it. Lick up all the peanut butter..."

10/13/2011 9:33:17 AM

"I'm going to beat you to death!"

"FATTIE!"

"Get a job!"

"SHUT...THE FUCK...UP!"


I'm very verbally abusive to my dog...

10/13/2011 9:34:15 AM

Quote :

""I'm going to beat you to death!" "FATTIE!""

hahahahhaa, both of these things were yelled at one of my dogs, verbatim, this morning.

10/13/2011 9:36:54 AM

ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS!?!?!?!?!

10/13/2011 9:37:18 AM

Quote :

"BELLA, WHY DID YOU DO THAT? HUH? WHY! "

Quote :

"You wanna go out?"

Quote :

"No! Stop it!"

10/13/2011 10:21:26 AM

Quote :

"You gonna eat? Cece, eat! No? Fine then, fuck you, I don't give a shit."

10/13/2011 10:22:05 AM

Quote :

"HOLY CRAP! IT'S A DOG"

or

Quote :

"OMG! YOU'RE A DOG"

10/13/2011 10:24:31 AM

Cat: Meow
Me: Meow
Cat: Meooooooooooooooooow
Me: Meooooooooooooooooow
Cat: MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW
Me: GODDAMMIT WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!?!?!?!

10/13/2011 10:25:13 AM

^ this

10/13/2011 10:28:13 AM

WHY DO YOU WAIT UNTIL I GET HOME, from a very long day at work, TO POOP! and then make me cover it for you?!?!





he's my little stinker

10/13/2011 10:31:19 AM

STOP TALKING TO ME. ITS 4AM. I'LL SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT INSIDE IN THE MORNING!



and its usually a headless bird or rabbit with the head a couple feet away from the animal.

10/13/2011 10:31:49 AM

Wanna come snuggles with mama?



*finds out later it's a raccoon and not my cat*

10/13/2011 10:32:23 AM

Cat: Meow
Me: Fuck you.
Cat: Meow
Me: Shut up.
Cat: Meow?
Me: Alright fine. *lets cat outside*

10/13/2011 10:33:12 AM

^ haha, poor biscuit.

10/13/2011 10:34:37 AM

i've recently gotten into the habit of every time i have to go to the bathroom i will go find my dog and yell at the top of my lungs...


"SAAAAMMMM....I HAVE TO GO PEE!!! I REALLY NEED TO PEE! COME WITH ME WHILE I PEE! THIS IS WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE YELLED AT EVERY FUCKING TIME YOU HAVE TO PEE!!!!!!!!"

10/13/2011 10:35:28 AM

lol we taught our dog to ring a bell when she needs to pee, but now she just rings it whenever she wants to go outside

10/13/2011 10:36:38 AM

The following are all pretty common on my house:

"HEY!!!"
"WTF are you doing weirdo"
"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha"
"*whistle* c'mere"
"GET OFF THE TABLE YOU FUCKING WHORE"
"You're lucky you're cute"
"I'm about to beat the shit out of you"
"GET. THE FUCK. OFF. THE. TABLE."
"Aahahahawwwwwwwww"

I hate that she knows exactly how to diffuse me when I'm pissed off at her...hard to stay mad when she chirps all cute and shit then leaps up onto a high surface so she can stretch out and headbutt my face.

[Edited on October 13, 2011 at 10:55 AM. Reason : oh for some reason i thought this thread was about girlfriends. i dont really say much to my cat]

10/13/2011 10:54:12 AM

Do it again and I'll make you into a hat

10/13/2011 10:59:16 AM

Cat: Meow
Me: Quit it
Cat: Meow
Me: Quit it
Cat: Meow?
Me: OK, I'll pet you

(Cat climbs on top of keyboard)

10/13/2011 11:00:40 AM

awwwwwwwwww now I miss my kitty and I want to go home early and nap with him

10/13/2011 11:07:58 AM

Stop squirming, I will be done in a minute.

10/13/2011 11:09:45 AM

Don't look at me like that

10/13/2011 11:09:51 AM

STOP SMACKING!!!!

10/13/2011 11:22:35 AM

not proud but...

Quote :

" can i has kisses?? Oh! Thank you for mah kisses! "

hahahahaha ive taught my dogs to give me kisses on the cheek in the car

10/13/2011 11:31:11 AM

Quote :

""I'm going to beat you to death!" "FATTIE!" "Get a job!" "SHUT...THE FUCK...UP!" I'm very verbally abusive to my dog... "

You forgot

"QUIT LICKING"

"QUIT DRINKING OUT OF THE TOILET"

"EAT YOUR OWN DAMN FOOD"

10/13/2011 11:32:29 AM

Quote :

"oh for some reason i thought this thread was about girlfriends. i dont really say much to my cat"

10/13/2011 11:36:41 AM

Quote :

"No? Fine then, fuck you, I don't give a shit."

Could be said about anything you talk to

10/13/2011 11:38:50 AM

oh, i forgot about my cat...

Quote :

"I hate you cat RAAAAOOOWW! Fro-doh-doh head"

10/13/2011 11:40:18 AM

dang ya'll are mean

im a big cheese ball with my cat

all i do is cuddle her, pick her up, give her treats (& food of course) and brush her and talk sweetly to her

unless shes meowing while i sleep then i lock that bitch out

10/13/2011 12:01:21 PM

Quote :

"Cat: Meow Me: Meow Cat: Meooooooooooooooooow Me: Meooooooooooooooooow Cat: MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW Me: GODDAMMIT WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!?!?!?! "

MOTHER FUCKER I ONLY SPEAK ENGLISH!!!

10/13/2011 12:14:06 PM

Quote :

"Could be said about anything you talk to"

10/13/2011 12:15:34 PM

"THERE IS NO ONE AT THE DOOR! THAT WAS THE DAMN TV!"

10/13/2011 12:29:24 PM

to add to ^

"OH. MY. GOD. THAT DOG IS ON THE TV...ITS NOT REAL!!!"

10/13/2011 12:32:42 PM

if i'm angry with them:

"YOU'RE ADOPTED!"

10/13/2011 1:01:46 PM

"What are you going to do about it, huh?" when I'm talking shit to him during our wrestling matches

10/13/2011 1:02:14 PM

Quote :

"You are a jerk"

Quote :

"Rew, you look like a mop dog."

To Maggie-

Quote :

"Dobby dog!"

Smack Maggie on the hind-

Quote :

"I got that butt!"

Quote :

"Ark bark!"

Quote :

"Maggie, you are a sneaky snake!"

10/13/2011 1:06:54 PM

Quote :

"Tanuk, you are a dick"

10/13/2011 3:14:43 PM

me: "rawr"
dog Shep: *snort*
me: "raawwwrrr"
Shep: *SSNOOORRTTTT*
me: "RRAAAWWWRRRRR!"
Shep: *FOOT STOMP* *CREEPY, UPSIDE DOWN, SILENT OPEN-MOUTH OPOSSUM FACE*

Kitty: *muffled* "MMRRROOWWWW??" X 8
me: what! I'm right here!
Kitty: *drops bedroom shoe* "bbrrrrrrrooowwww?" "mau" :3
me: "ugh"

I used to talk to my bird, she loved to say her name.
Maggie: "Maggie?"
me: "Maggie"
Maggie: "Maggie!"
me: "Maggie!"
Maggie: *whispers* "maggie"

10/13/2011 3:37:45 PM

Cat: Meow
Me: Meow
Cat: Meooooooooooooooooow
Me: Meooooooooooooooooow
Cat: MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW
Me: GODDAMMIT WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!?!?!?!

leads to:

Cat: Meow
Me: Quit it
Cat: Meow
Me: Quit it
Cat: Meow?
Me: OK, I'll pet you

Daily. Anybody want a cat?

10/13/2011 4:05:45 PM

Me: 'hey Ares want to do car work/dog walk/ not jack shit tonight?'
Ares: 'no response'
Me: 'alright glad you agree let's get to it'

10/13/2011 4:12:31 PM

I call the dog my supervisor because he has to be over my shoulder at all times scoping out what I am doing. He also likes to follow everyone around. And he exercises with me

When I work from home I talk to him and the cat about annoying things people do via email.

10/13/2011 4:13:12 PM

"And you, you little shit-head. You're staying here."

10/13/2011 5:26:02 PM

I inventnew pet names for my dog every few days, I thought about making a thread just to list the new pet names I come up with. some of the most used phrases are:

"stella, CALM DOWN"

"what do you want you big dummy"

"stella, you grimey bitch"

10/13/2011 5:32:31 PM