It happens when you go to give a normal handshake and your friend tries to give you a "bro" handshake and what results is just flat out uncomfortable.

4/11/2012 12:34:48 PM

where's that gif from the hockey game



[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 12:35 PM. Reason : .]

4/11/2012 12:35:19 PM

there it is

[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 12:37 PM. Reason : .]

4/11/2012 12:35:45 PM

4/11/2012 12:36:49 PM

or when someone clenches too soon and gets just the fingers

4/11/2012 12:37:13 PM

or inadvertently crushes the other person's hand

4/11/2012 12:38:00 PM

Is this when you go to give a normal shake, and the other person desperate to "outsqueeze" you, grips too soon - causing them to uncomfortably squeeze your bunched up fingers?

4/11/2012 12:38:25 PM

the awkward ones (or just plain creepy/uncomfortable/wtf) ones i don't like are:

the bonecrusher (seriously, why do men do this to me??!)

the sweaty limp-noodle (eeeehhhhh)

the fag-i-can-see-through-your-repressed-faggotry handshake (kind of like a debutante offering her hand or something, i've gotten it on several occasions)

4/11/2012 12:39:09 PM

grip on a dead fish

4/11/2012 12:39:27 PM

Quote :

"or when someone clenches too soon and gets just the fingers"

fuckin' hate when people do that

4/11/2012 12:39:33 PM

ahahaha, i also have done the 'bro' handshake when someone wasnt going for it, which resulted in me tripping and falling into their torso instead of shoulder bumping

4/11/2012 12:40:02 PM

I always address a bad handshake and then re-initiate a good one.

Not sure if a lot of people are like me when it comes to this, but I substantially evaluate someone based upon their handshake and initial presentation.

4/11/2012 12:40:45 PM

yeah the limp, faggy handshakes are the worst.

4/11/2012 12:42:18 PM

yeah, i have no reservations about calling out a bad handshake (like when we miss or something) and making them re-do it. or give me a hug. i love hugs.

4/11/2012 12:44:09 PM

i call people out on retard-strength handshakes

save it for the games, big guy

4/11/2012 12:46:45 PM

i wonder if men laugh when i counter their bone-crushers with my weak attempt at squeezing back. i've gotten pretty good at realizing just before they try to crumble my hand to ashes and squeezing back with all my might so that they can't get the knuckles to touch. mother fuckers.

4/11/2012 12:48:26 PM

Those gifs do make me feel awkward.

4/11/2012 12:51:46 PM

the retard strength handshakes annoy me the most.

4/11/2012 12:53:05 PM

i usually spit in my hand before shaking.

4/11/2012 12:53:20 PM

4/11/2012 12:53:50 PM

i either give a firm, manly handshake, and/or "bro" it up when appropriate

but when i want to fuck with people, my two favorites are:

1. reach out for a regular handshake...just as your hands are touching, use your index finger to quickly tickle the palm of the person whose hand you're shaking
2. reach out for a regular handshake...begin to shake the person's hand in a firm, respectful way...quickly yank their hand into your genitals

4/11/2012 12:54:05 PM

i usually go for the extend hand/pull back and run fingers through hair routine.

4/11/2012 12:55:07 PM

bro it up- you talkin hand bait into a hug catch?

4/11/2012 12:55:24 PM

wait that was you? MOTHERFUCKER

4/11/2012 12:55:25 PM

idk if this is gonna work but it deserves to be in here even though it was not a handshake

4/11/2012 12:59:42 PM

Quote :

"retard-strength"

can someone clarify this point

4/11/2012 1:02:47 PM

using an extreme and unnecessary amount of strength in a handshake

4/11/2012 1:04:46 PM

this thread makes bob dole cry

4/11/2012 1:07:03 PM

Quote :

""or when someone clenches too soon and gets just the fingers""

the worst.


that's why i make a point to really get my hand in there.

4/11/2012 1:08:24 PM

When someone's shake is so weak it's like they aren't making any effort to actually grip my hand, it makes me rage a little bit.

4/11/2012 1:19:49 PM

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/handshakes




ahahahahahaahahha

[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 1:21 PM. Reason : ..]

4/11/2012 1:20:31 PM

One of the Judges I've been in front of has a dead fish handshake. I thought that was forbidden in males over 50.

4/11/2012 1:21:54 PM

happens to me all the time on the tennis court. i've started to move towards slapping rackets....can't screw that up.

4/11/2012 1:37:28 PM

^^fwiw, some guys will hold back their handshakes when shaking a woman's hand...i don't dead fish it, but i don't squeeze with the same strength as i would another man either

4/11/2012 1:40:03 PM

He only offers his middle three fingers with a slightly cupped palm.

[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 1:41 PM. Reason : like a freaking dignitary or something.]

4/11/2012 1:41:02 PM

gross.

the only thing worse are "captain handshake" guys who try to show dominance by gripping your hand too early making it seem like you are the one with the dead fish handshake. you can usually tell who these guys are and when they're going for that move. i always shove my hand into that thumb/index finger socket to get the upper hand

4/11/2012 1:45:42 PM

I dare someone to do the forearm pull into the crotch move.....at a job interview

4/11/2012 1:49:20 PM

In a group setting, I enjoy fucking with folks like this





[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 1:56 PM. Reason : x]

4/11/2012 1:55:54 PM

It's not a bad way of blackmailing yourself into a job.

Look if you don't give me this job, I'm going to tell everyone you tried to grab my junk.

4/11/2012 1:56:41 PM

preponderance of awkward gifs itt

4/11/2012 1:59:31 PM

4/21/2012 5:01:37 PM

mike glennon receding hairline exposed?

4/21/2012 5:04:47 PM

I had no idea RW got married.

4/21/2012 5:05:37 PM

^ U MAD?

4/21/2012 5:08:53 PM

Livid that I missed that piece of news. But it's okay, I already found the pictures. I approve.

4/21/2012 5:10:09 PM

hahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha

4/21/2012 5:10:13 PM

4/21/2012 5:22:43 PM

would be resolved if everyone just gave a fucking normal handshake like a real man

/thread

4/21/2012 5:24:18 PM

and so we meet again...

4/21/2012 5:24:40 PM

FWIW, if you shake someone's hand with your pointer finger extended so that it runs parallel with their arm, douchenuggets can try to alpha-squeeze you all they want and you can just sit there and laugh.

4/21/2012 5:31:24 PM