Really don't need you anymore. We have medicine now.

This has been a Krallum presentation.

3/13/2013 3:28:35 PM

Period

3/13/2013 3:29:20 PM

You don't believe in god... GOD forgives you, he blessed you with a computer and the name krallum

3/13/2013 3:29:45 PM

Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son ?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, you believe in GOD ?

Student : Absolutely, sir.

Professor : Is GOD good ?

Student : Sure.

Professor: Is GOD all powerful ?

Student : Yes.

Professor: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn’t. How is this GOD good then? Hmm?

(Student was silent.)

Professor: You can’t answer, can you ? Let’s start again, young fella. Is GOD good?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Is satan good ?

Student : No.

Professor: Where does satan come from ?

Student : From … GOD …

Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it ? And GOD did make everything. Correct?

Student : Yes.

Professor: So who created evil ?

(Student did not answer.)

Professor: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, who created them ?

(Student had no answer.)

Professor: Science says you have 5 Senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son, have you ever seen GOD?

Student : No, sir.

Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD?

Student : No , sir.

Professor: Have you ever felt your GOD, tasted your GOD, smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any sensory perception of GOD for that matter?

Student : No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.

Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student : Yes.

Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.

Professor: Yes, faith. And that is the problem Science has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Professor: Yes.

Student : And is there such a thing as cold?

Professor: Yes.

Student : No, sir. There isn’t.

(The lecture theater became very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There was pin-drop silence in the lecture theater.)

Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?

Student : You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light. But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and its called darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, well you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?

Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man ?

Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Professor: Flawed ? Can you explain how?

Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good GOD and a bad GOD. You are viewing the concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.

Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Professor: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going.)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor. Are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class was in uproar.)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?

(The class broke out into laughter. )

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on faith, son.

Student : That is it sir … Exactly ! The link between man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that keeps things alive and moving.

P.S.

I believe you have enjoyed the conversation. And if so, you’ll probably want your friends / colleagues to enjoy the same, won’t you?

Forward this to increase their knowledge … or FAITH.

By the way, that student was EINSTEIN.

3/13/2013 3:32:21 PM

My favorite thing about that joke, is that I have only ever read like the first 4 and the last lines and it makes me smirk.

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:33:22 PM

Half way through that I couldn't help but think of

3/13/2013 3:37:37 PM

God damn that story is chuck full of gold

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

[Edited on March 13, 2013 at 3:42 PM. Reason : and in my opinion we don't really need medicine. ]

3/13/2013 3:40:44 PM

I remember all of those professors teaching us atheism at the university.

3/13/2013 3:42:44 PM

good troll good troll

i'm mistergreen and i approved this message

3/13/2013 3:43:31 PM

More like

Quote :

"Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son ? Student : Yes, Dr Turbo. Professor : Naww son naaww. "

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:43:50 PM

You mean, religion, not exclusively christianity. They all suck.

3/13/2013 3:46:08 PM

Christians are the only ones who are pompous but don't care enough to get violent over it. They just like their good feelies and keeping me from having my good feelies.

Like I'm not saying Christianity is wrong. They're all wrong. I'm saying it sucks the most.



Buddhism sucks? Really?

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:48:13 PM

Krallum, you should be more tolerant of others

I'm Krallum and I approved this message

3/13/2013 3:50:27 PM

I should be more tolerant of intolerance?

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:51:56 PM

I mean, buddhism is cooler than a lot of religions, but believing in make-believe things like reincarnation and nirvana is still silly.

3/13/2013 3:52:05 PM

Krallum try being the bigger person

3/13/2013 3:52:47 PM

I am not talking about logic or anything. I am talking about how much of a tax it is on society. Let it go please.

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:53:07 PM

On american society?

3/13/2013 3:53:57 PM

buddhism is actually pretty taxing on those that actually practice it.

3/13/2013 3:55:03 PM

Quote :

"buddhism is actually pretty taxing on those that actually practice it."

Right. Not the rest of society

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/13/2013 3:55:41 PM

Uh-oh

GZ called and wants his every thread ever back

3/13/2013 3:58:51 PM

Yes, Christianity sucks because it asks you to not do things you like. Not do thinks like pre-marital sex...because that always works out OH SO WELL! Not to over-indulge, because why drink alcohol unless you can't remember what you did. Not to kill, because killing is fun. Not to steal, because if I can't get it the right why, then I'm gonna take what someone worked hard for. These are just a few examples, but examples none the less. Now exactly what is it that Christianity asks you not to do, that you like to do, that works out better in the end by doing it?

3/13/2013 5:58:42 PM

popcorn.gif

3/13/2013 6:04:32 PM

^^you need to try harder, the Einstein joke is better than that!

3/13/2013 6:18:14 PM

I'm not trying to try hard. I'm just asking a simple question. What is it that Christianity asks you not to do, that you like to do, that works out better in the end by doing it? I'm hoping for a reasonable response.

3/13/2013 6:21:21 PM

Quote :

"What is it that Christianity asks you not to do, that you like to do, that works out better in the end by doing it?"

treat gays like human beings

3/13/2013 6:23:24 PM

FroshKiller is someone you should meet.

BTW, according to snopes the professor vs einstein bit is bullshit.

3/13/2013 6:23:49 PM

did you really need snopes to figure that out?

3/13/2013 6:24:46 PM

^^^^Honestly, that's a very silly question. Religion doesn't just suck because it doesn't allow you do stuff (is that how you see it?). My main complaint with religion is it is used to control societies with make believe stories and false hope. It's used by politicians to pass laws that are harmful and ignore science. I could keep going, but that's enough.

btw, plenty of people who are christians don't do the things you speak of, you know? you don't need to be a christian to know it's wrong to kill people. Do you not kill people just because you're a christian? Do you drink some, but not too much, because you're a christian? Come on man..

[Edited on March 13, 2013 at 6:28 PM. Reason : ]

3/13/2013 6:26:06 PM

all you heathens are going straight to hell

3/13/2013 6:36:46 PM

Quote :

"FroshKiller is someone you should meet. "

Skip the middleman and go straight to the person he ripped off.

3/13/2013 6:39:53 PM

Quote :

"What is it that Christianity asks you not to do, that you like to do, that works out better in the end by doing it?"

that isn't a good reason for RELIGIOUS law

that's a good reason for COMMON SENSE THINGS that are part of secular law

it's better society for everyone if you don't murder people, steal things, etc

it's not like that wouldn't occur to anyone if it weren't in the Bible

Quote :

"btw, plenty of people who are christians don't do the things you speak of, you know? you don't need to be a christian to know it's wrong to kill people. Do you not kill people just because you're a christian? Do you drink some, but not too much, because you're a christian? Come on man"

this

[Edited on March 13, 2013 at 6:50 PM. Reason : .]

3/13/2013 6:48:32 PM

Quote :

"St Paul’s advice about whether women are allowed to teach men in church: “I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent.” (1 Timothy 2:12) "

Do I need to start picking apart the bible in this thread?

3/13/2013 6:52:09 PM

Quote :

"believing in make-believe things like reincarnation and nirvana is still silly"

nirvana is a real thing, and only certain types of buddhists believe in reincarnation

3/13/2013 6:52:46 PM

Quote :

"“Slaves, submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the cruel.” (1 Peter 2:18)"

My personal favorite, God liked slaves he says so in the bible.

3/13/2013 6:53:43 PM

ibtcriesaboutcontext

3/13/2013 6:58:04 PM