Dad told me today his brother called him to say that his youngest son went missing 3 days ago and today they received a call from the kidnappers who have taken him several hundred miles away.

This is what they demanded:

~ USD 200,000 (they asked for 20 million in the local currency)
5 gold rings
5 original Rayban sunglasses

So apparently, as in any Asian shithole country, most of the designer good are copies and so, original Raybans are very hard to come by.

5/31/2013 3:17:49 PM

Ill throw in $10

Im Krallum and I approved this message

5/31/2013 3:19:10 PM

local currency = raghead monopoly money, just print some out on an inkjet
5 gold rings = persian "blinged" out fat guys, get 5 rings from qvc
5 original rayban = theyve never seen real ones before, get fakes

this whole thing can be cleared up for about 20 USD

5/31/2013 3:28:53 PM

5/31/2013 3:30:47 PM

I don't carry cash but I'll buy you a combo meal

5/31/2013 3:31:35 PM

I'm gonna need some kind of satisfaction guarantee though.

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

5/31/2013 3:32:31 PM

Did you offer to smell their underwear in exchange?

I'm just going on the record as saying I don't believe you in the slightest.

5/31/2013 3:37:28 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgSe_gzyM1c

5/31/2013 4:32:43 PM

is he supposed to be a sex slave or something?

5/31/2013 4:33:46 PM

Krallum, I will convey your offer to my dad and have him convey it to his brother. I don't know about any guarantees... what do you have in mind?

Jeepxj420, I don't get it.

Forte FTW

^ Who, the son? I don't understand why you would say that. He is being held for ransom by militants/dacoits/gangsters/terrorists/whatever. If they are also assaulting him (sexually or otherwise) while they are holding him, no one knows, at least not now. But I wouldn't be surprised if they do, seeing as how that's what a lot of those gangsters do.

The son is 22, poor thing just graduated with an engineering degree 3 months ago. Don't know if the family has that kind of money or not, but his 2 older brothers are both working (one is an MBA, one in IT), and I am sure they have land they can sell.

Just thought about it for a bit. So I guess there are 5 of them, and they want the gold rings for their wives and the Raybans for themselves to look cool as they go around kidnapping people. Fucking animals... hope a meteor hits their homes.

5/31/2013 5:43:39 PM

Quote :

"hope a meteor hits their homes."

after your cousin gets out right?

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

5/31/2013 5:47:49 PM

Five golden rings

5/31/2013 5:47:53 PM

raybans with tracking devices yo

5/31/2013 6:00:27 PM

if i was about to get kidnapped, i'd probably tell the kidnappers that my whole family was dead

5/31/2013 6:03:02 PM

Yeah they'd definitely just let you go then

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

5/31/2013 6:04:17 PM

you sound very concerned

5/31/2013 7:08:19 PM

^ perhaps i should be... but unfortunately, he is a stranger to me. i haven't been to my homeland for 27 years, and so that's the last time i saw him. damn, he wasn't even born last time i went to my homeland, so i have never seen him, and haven't seen (or spoken to) his parents/siblings for 27 years.

i feel bad for my dad though. he hasn't seen them for a long time as well, like 20 or so years, but he has kept in touch via phone. can't be a good feeling to know your nephew has been kidnapped.

may the great obama obliterate the kidnappers with a drone strike... after my cousin escapes somehow.

5/31/2013 8:56:04 PM

5/31/2013 9:07:08 PM

Damn, that sucks. Hope everything buffs out for him.

5/31/2013 10:07:47 PM

Did you offer to smell their underwear in exchange?

I'm just going on the record as saying I don't believe you in the slightest.

6/1/2013 7:45:34 AM

Did you offer to smell their underwear in exchange?

I'm just going on the record as saying I don't believe you in the slightest.

6/1/2013 7:51:07 AM

Send them a letter back merely thanking them for taking your cousin as he was a burden the family could not support and an accident in the first place and see what happens.

Or send them 5 ring pops, some fauxkleys, and the entire game of monopoly.

I guess my position is, call their bluff.

6/1/2013 8:07:12 AM

On the 5th day of my kidnapping, these ragheads ransomed me, for FIVE GOLDEN RINGS!

4 ray ban sunglasses

3 Fizzy bubblech

2 tons of cheap cologne

And a shit load of fake currency

6/1/2013 8:35:57 AM

^hah

6/1/2013 10:26:45 AM

I probably laughed too hard at OopsPowSrprs' post.

6/1/2013 10:34:48 AM

Damn, that sucks. Hope everything buffs out for him.

[Edited on June 1, 2013 at 11:57 AM. Reason : i don't know what buff means but it sounds sincere]

6/1/2013 11:57:40 AM

serious thread is serious

6/1/2013 1:53:41 PM

Where was the son originally, and where is he now, do they know?
D: Good luck. What actions have been taken?

6/1/2013 4:35:17 PM

thanks qntm.

^ they have taken him to another city which is in another province/state. at least that's where the kidnappers said they were calling from. pretty much the whole country is lawless, but the province they have taken him to is quite notoriously lawless.

no actions taken afaik. spoke to my father today but he didn't have any update from his brother.

6/1/2013 5:22:05 PM

any updates?

6/13/2013 5:26:04 PM

rip lil fella

6/13/2013 5:28:09 PM

Good think you have a second cousin, right?

/chitchat

That's unfortunate to hear. Hopefully it gets figured out.

6/13/2013 6:43:38 PM

IBTNavySeals

[Edited on June 13, 2013 at 6:52 PM. Reason : .]

6/13/2013 6:51:36 PM

dude what happened

7/25/2013 11:01:55 PM

Sorry man. I hope it works out

7/25/2013 11:04:47 PM

:-\ good luck

that shit is lame

people that do this kind of stuff are the reason we're probably gonna be 100% government monitored in 100 or 200 years

just because of dumb pricks that do this kind of crap

7/25/2013 11:05:00 PM

aha, how very bad of me to forget my cousin!

my dad sent me this email on July 11

Quote :

"Dear All, Assalamu alaikum. [X]'s son who was kidnapped for ransom on 18 May reached home early this morning after 53 days of captivity without any harm and without payment of any money. He was recovered by Police."

thanks for asking. ^, ^^, ^^^


[Edited on July 25, 2013 at 11:07 PM. Reason : ]

7/25/2013 11:05:28 PM

that's very good to hear

7/25/2013 11:10:14 PM

wow, that is good news! no harm and no money? nice

7/25/2013 11:39:33 PM

thanks guys. i know, no harm, no ransom.

that's like the 12th time ever the police has done their job in the last 65+ years since the country was founded

7/26/2013 12:05:07 AM

Oh damn 53 days? What was it like? Have you talked to him any?

7/26/2013 12:49:39 AM

Quote :

"no harm and no money?"

no harm no foul

mo' money mo' problems

7/26/2013 12:53:00 AM

no i havent talked to him. i have never seen him or spoken to him, actually. i will quote myself:

Quote :

"^ perhaps i should be [more concerned]... but unfortunately, he is a stranger to me. i haven't been to my homeland for 27 years, and so that's the last time i saw him. damn, he wasn't even born last time i went to my homeland, so i have never seen him, and haven't seen (or spoken to) his parents/siblings for 27 years."

but i have been meaning to speak to my dad about it, just haven't had a chance. i will ask him if he knows any more details that he got from his brother (my uncle).

thanks for asking.

7/26/2013 12:53:10 AM

Glad he's back unharmed!!!

But out of curiosity why are you intentionally not telling us which country this all went down in?

7/26/2013 9:06:51 AM

Come on. We all know this shit was made up

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/26/2013 10:48:30 AM

time for someone to paint their masterpiece

7/26/2013 11:35:39 AM

^^^

Pakistan

7/26/2013 6:16:38 PM

I thought you were Saudi.

Did they off any of those motherfuckers in the recovery? One can only hope. If not, maybe they'll eventually suck up a Hellfire.

7/27/2013 1:17:41 AM

I am not saudi, and don't insult me by calling me one

I don't know the details, I hope they did. Talking to my dad later today to see if he has any details of the rescue and captivity.

7/27/2013 1:56:09 AM

he's a paki

7/27/2013 3:01:02 AM