/what's your favorite?

8/15/2013 2:38:14 PM

Here's to nipples, because without them, breasts would have no point.

8/15/2013 2:40:21 PM

^^have some friends to impress this weekend?

8/15/2013 2:59:47 PM

all you need to know about toast:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toast

8/15/2013 3:05:17 PM

^^ nawww just trying to be a renaissance man, yadig?

8/15/2013 3:46:55 PM

My best friend's favorite:

Here's to you
And here's to me
The best of friends that we may be
If ever we should disagree
Then f**k you
And here's to me

8/16/2013 12:46:49 AM

I like a fluffy but thick french toast with blueberries and maple syrup on the side. buy all of the ingredients organic and use sliced baguette. serve with unsalted butter,uncured applewood smoked bacon and fresh squeezed organic orange juice.

8/16/2013 12:50:13 AM

Some hae meat and canna eat,
And some wad eat that want it;
But we hae meat, and we can eat,
And sae let the Lord be thankit.

8/16/2013 2:54:00 AM

8/16/2013 7:47:04 AM

here's to you
here's to me
best of friends we'll forever be
if you and me should disagree
well fuck you, here's to me

8/16/2013 9:24:21 AM

^ that's the way I've always heard that toast. the italics made the difference

8/16/2013 10:00:33 AM

Texas is ok if you don't mind the all the carbs.

8/16/2013 10:47:05 AM

If you're not going to speak extemporaneously when you toast like an actual, interesting human being, you might as well just trot out this old chestnut:

CHAMPAGNE TO MY REAL FRIENDS

AND REAL PAIN TO MY SHAM FRIENDS

Because no matter what you say, it's going to fall out of your mouth and hit the table like a turd, so what's the fucking point?

8/16/2013 1:32:26 PM

If you say these toasts out loud you're an idiot.

8/16/2013 8:12:46 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fq6R39wWXGM

8/16/2013 9:20:58 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1W2FIaCDT8

8/16/2013 9:28:27 PM

Quote :

"JERRY: Well, well, look at you. Its a little skimpy there isn't it? GEORGE: Do you know the last time I wore this thing? Six years ago, when I made that toast at Bobby Leighton's wedding. JERRY: Ooo, that was a bad toast. GEORGE: It wasn't that bad. JERRY: I never heard anybody curse in a toast. GEORGE: I was trying to loosen 'em up a little bit. JERRY: There were old people there, all the relatives. You were like a Red Fox record. I mean, at the end of the toast nobody even drank. They were just standing there, they were just frozen! That might have been one of the worst all time toasts. GEORGE: Alright, still her father didn't have to throw me out like that, he could have just asked me to leave. "

8/17/2013 2:52:59 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JvInV--7s7s

8/19/2013 12:04:38 AM

True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...

8/19/2013 6:39:14 AM

i've had to do this a few times. generally speaking, i think it's good to have an outline in your head of what you're going to say, as opposed to using note cards. using the former method, you are organized in what you say but it still comes off as spontaneous. also, we always underestimate the time we spend speaking, so brevity is key.

i don't have anything to share to be recited word-for-word, nor do i think one should take that route, but those things have helped me in the past if you have to make one.

8/19/2013 8:16:25 PM

^ agree. have something of an outline planned, but don't memorize what you're gonna say word for word. it doesn't come off as genuine IMO.

8/19/2013 9:55:09 PM

Watch Cocktail.
Quote their toasts.
Profit.

8/20/2013 12:25:05 PM

Started going down a wikipedia hole and got to the buttered cat paradox entry:

Quote :

"In reality, cats do possess the ability to turn themselves right side up in mid-air if they should fall upside-down, known as the cat righting reflex, which enables them to land on their feet if dropped from sufficient height (about 30 cm (12 in)).[13] Toast, however, lacks both the ability and the desire to right itself."

[Edited on August 20, 2013 at 12:53 PM. Reason : end tag]

8/20/2013 12:52:59 PM

my wife always says...

"cheers...to hot sex and no babies!!"

i like...

"cheers big ears"

those aren't really toasts though

oh i just remembered this one...

"here's to honor...if you can't cum in 'er, cum honor"


[Edited on August 20, 2013 at 1:31 PM. Reason : ']

8/20/2013 1:25:09 PM

heres a circle heres a dot
now youve got your cootie shot

8/20/2013 6:04:57 PM