If asses have their own language, mine just said
WHARGBLBLBLNLVVBBM'LMNFEFfffffff!dripdrip

2/17/2014 10:07:37 PM

I'm aroused...

2/17/2014 10:13:06 PM

you throwing up yet or just shitting

2/17/2014 10:21:10 PM

Been there..done that....it sucks man. Damn near was hospitalized from dehydration...

2/18/2014 8:38:09 AM

I started puking Sunday night, that was the first thing. I just found it too difficult to post to TWW at the same time.

2/18/2014 8:42:58 AM

Smoke a fat blunt. It will help with the nausea.


Seriously.

2/18/2014 8:54:13 AM

This is the worst sickness I ever had.

2/18/2014 8:58:32 AM

Agreed sitting on the can with a trash can in front of you is the worst feeling ever

2/18/2014 9:02:03 AM

Norodiet: instant results

2/18/2014 9:28:08 AM

I feel for ya. Had it back in Oct. 2011 when it kicked in the night after I had a four hour root canal earlier that day Off and on vomiting for 14 hours, then 24 hours later loss of bowel control. When you feel like death incarnate and are faced with having to wash sheets (and yo ass) it is not the best of times.

2/18/2014 7:07:39 PM

This thread sure is pleasant!

2/18/2014 7:08:24 PM

Norodiet is legit, but I'm on the South Bronx Parasite diet now.

2/18/2014 7:09:12 PM

gotta love the 1PR (push release)

2/18/2014 8:08:21 PM

I had it one year in college, over winter break I think. Affectionately called, the puking virus, it was a living hell.

There's nothing quite like demonstrating to your girlfriend that you are not in control of your own asshole.

2/18/2014 8:13:42 PM

Oh God the smell....not the smell from tearing up the bathroom... just the smell of the Norovirus sickness...the smell of contamination...for four days...ugh...never ever want to go through that again...never ever...

2/19/2014 11:08:42 AM

Dec 2013...I will rebuild.

Most terrible 3 days of my life.

2/19/2014 12:22:26 PM

Quote :

"There's nothing quite like demonstrating to your girlfriend that you are not in control of your own asshole."

I got a good laugh from this. Thanks.

2/19/2014 8:22:20 PM

I had this 2 years ago. At one point I just laid in my shower, buck naked, with the water running because there was no point in even trying to contain the uncontrollable eruptions that were coming out both ends of me at random intervals.

2/19/2014 9:41:06 PM

missed a week of work from this shit last year. vomiting the first day, followed by 3-4 days of nothing but explosive liquid from my ass

2/19/2014 9:41:22 PM

Feb 2012 for me.

Me and my gf unaffectionately call it "the black waters" because, well, you know.


Don't drink sugary drinks, folks. Gatorade doesn't help, it only makes it worse.

2/19/2014 9:48:25 PM

cool

2/19/2014 9:51:24 PM

^^^^^

2/19/2014 9:52:39 PM

It wasn't funny though.

LOL

2/19/2014 11:01:04 PM

Bttt for possible.

I did not think I'd be peeing out of my butt right now...

2/24/2014 12:25:14 AM

Started coming out of both ends a couple hours ago. Oh, the huge manatee!

[Edited on February 24, 2014 at 3:57 AM. Reason : Also, body aches and uncontrollable shivering at points]

2/24/2014 3:57:21 AM

Dude, I really hope for your sake that you don't have it.

If you do, send Skwinkle away (out of the house) or it's pretty much 100% guaranteed that she'll get it too.

I remember having it in the spring of 2003. I went to bed feeling fine, and overnight I started oscillating between puking and violent anal explosions, with those two occasionally coinciding and not always in time for me to get to the shitter.

Come morning, I remember being too weak to drive myself to my parents house. While waiting at the curb for my parents to come pick me up from my apartment at the Summit, I was so weak that I couldn't make it back down to my apartment so I threw myself over a retaining wall and shit all over the base of a pine tree in front of my building. To this day I'm still really really thankful none of my neighbors came outside at that particular moment in time.

A day and a visit to the doctor later, I was recovering in bed at my parents house. I remember thinking "Hmm, I have to fart," squeezing slightly, and promptly shitting myself and the bed. I think I just rolled over and went back to sleep b/c I that point I didn't have the energy to care.

This is seriously the worst pestilence inflicted on the human race.

But it makes for some good stories later.

2/24/2014 7:12:09 AM

can you have a norovirus without the puking part? this is sounding close to what i had, which i thought was the flu

2/24/2014 7:52:59 AM

Jesus Christ....I hope I never get this.

2/24/2014 8:34:02 AM

I think it's just food poisoning. Have managed a single bought of diarrhea this morning which I think is due to the fact that I have had no food for 12 hours. Kind of afraid to eat before I get home.

2/24/2014 8:44:21 AM

good

you do not want this

you will also not have to question whether or not you have it, you will know

2/24/2014 10:03:40 AM

[NO]rovirus

2/24/2014 10:17:37 AM

@Fareako- Rarely does someone get food poisoning (at least in Murica).

Most of the time it's some type of bug. I've had Norovirus a couple times... with 2 kids at daycare, it's guaranteed you'll get it at least once a year.

2/24/2014 10:47:19 AM

His doc thinks it was staph from a hamburger he ate yesterday. Anal urination seems to have stopped.

2/24/2014 10:50:58 AM

I had this in 2004 or 2005.

And I gave it to like half of TWW.


pilgrimshoes still doesn't talk to me because of norovirus.

2/24/2014 12:31:29 PM

this thread makes me feel all

2/26/2014 8:05:33 PM

lol

2/26/2014 8:17:31 PM

Well... you guys have done it. You have given me another thing to be horrified about contracting, along with the red meat allergy and brain eating parasite from the lakes

2/27/2014 8:26:50 AM

you should be terrified

I once had a 104.3 degree temperature. I'd take that over Norovirus.

Every. Fucking. Time.

2/27/2014 8:50:42 AM

^ A fucking men to that.

I got norovirus earlier this year and it laid me flat for 7 days.

Between the violent diarrhea, awful nausea and horrible shooting pains in my gut for 3 of those 7 days, it was an overall horrible experience.

2/27/2014 1:31:46 PM

^^^not something you can contract, but you can add kidney stones to the list after reading that thread

2/27/2014 2:06:45 PM