Ain't It Grand???

Quote :

"Man Gets Five Years Probation for Stealing $460,000 in Quarters"

http://gawker.com/man-gets-five-years-probation-for-stealing-460-000-in-1602715693

7/9/2014 10:34:14 PM

Is much better now since it is Crank Arm Brewing

7/9/2014 10:42:01 PM

is this about Crank Arm Brewing?

7/9/2014 10:42:34 PM

It's not too late to make the Crank Arm joke is it?

7/9/2014 10:46:56 PM

one year anniversary party Aug. 9th. I'll probably be there.

7/10/2014 8:19:27 AM

who the hell wants to lug around damn near 1.84 million quarters. THAT WEIGHS 23000 POUNDS

7/10/2014 8:43:03 AM

He just could never get that stuffed animal out of the claw machine

7/10/2014 9:29:36 AM

I haven't been to Crank Arm in awhile, I'll have to fix that.

7/10/2014 9:31:25 AM

They already made a movie about this



[Edited on July 10, 2014 at 9:46 AM. Reason : ]

7/10/2014 9:45:54 AM

i hope he has a money bin

7/10/2014 9:47:57 AM

I feel like he would've gotten actual time if he had stolen, you know, half a million in 100 dollar bills.

7/10/2014 2:20:02 PM

Quote :

"who the hell wants to lug around damn near 1.84 million quarters. THAT WEIGHS 23000 POUNDS "

did not believe
did the math


yup, 11.5 tons.

7/10/2014 2:39:11 PM

I hope he got to do this at least once

7/10/2014 3:10:56 PM

i hope he carried it all around in sacks with big dollar signs painted on them

7/10/2014 3:14:06 PM

^^^haha yes. i did a quick google search on how much a quarter weighs. THEN DID THE MATHS

well actually i let google do the maths for me.

but anyways. that's a lot of quarters. he must be pretty strong.

7/10/2014 4:41:41 PM

It's a curious Americanism that even 5 years isn't considered "actual time"

7/10/2014 4:47:53 PM

Where is probation considered actual time?

7/10/2014 5:02:35 PM

they couldnt put him in prison, its already full with drug addicts

7/11/2014 6:56:15 AM

That is a lot of

7/11/2014 10:13:43 AM

That is a lot of

7/11/2014 10:29:49 AM

Hey guys. I got really into this... sorry

So the DA says that he moved this over a period of about two years, so that means on average he walked away with a bucket of 31.5 lbs of quarters each day, and that would be if he did it 7 days a week..... so he stole a bucket a day or so


So Penny "P" = 0.0055 lbs; Nickel "N" = 0.011 lbs; Dime "D" = 0.005 lbs; Quarter "Q" = 0.012 lbs

Where Coinage = P, N, D, or Q
Where $ = Total Dollars Stolen
X = quantity of coinage to reach dollar: (if Coinage = P then X = 100; if Coinage = Q then X =4...)

buckets daily in pounds = (($ * (coinage * X)) / 720)

As it would turn out, quarters were the best candidate for asportation.

Which actually led me to think of the artificial precious metal index the US Mint has created...
and what I mean is
in penniage, it takes about a half pound to make a dollar
in nickelage, it takes about a fifth of a pound to make a dollar
in dimage, it takes about 0.05 a pound to make a dollar
in quarterage, it takes about 0.048 a pound to make a dollar
with a half dollar, it takes 0.05 a pound to make a dollar
with the presidential coins it takes about 0.025 pounds to make a dollar

So oddly, it looks like dimes have a connection to half dollars in the same way that quarters have a connection to dollar coins.
What do I mean? The same weight in either dimes or half-dollars would make a dollar. This means that the mint has "artificially" created a value of the cupro-nickel in that denomination saying that, at least in theory, the metallic component of the dime or half dollar will equal a dollar if you get that gross weight.

They seem to follow that same trend by extrapolating the precious component and saying that the metal in the dollar coin is theoretically twice as valuable as that used in the half dollar, requiring only half that weight to make a dollar. And the quarter? Theoretical mint value based on weight is between half dollar and dollar.

As a side note, all paper tender weighs exactly one gram, whether a single dollar bill, a five, or a benjy....try it on a digi-scale.

Note we follow the customary system in the country but our preferred mode of demarcating the dimensions of our currency is in the metric system.


But he has the greatest comeback of all time if anyone ever calls him a jackass.
He can simply respond he is...a quarter-horse.
ha

7/11/2014 11:36:43 PM