12

10/29/2004 5:59:00 PM

TO BILL WHO?

10/29/2004 6:08:36 PM

Yes...it's true...I slept with Bill.....best sex I ever had.

10/29/2004 6:22:45 PM

then it must be hard to type
Ol Brasky told me one time that he always eats the fingers of women who bring him pleasure

Thats how I knew he had been with my mother

10/29/2004 7:09:36 PM

.

[Edited on October 29, 2004 at 7:14 PM. Reason : .]

10/29/2004 7:14:17 PM

^^Yeah, my mother is missing the fingers of her right hand, and all of her left arm. She said it was a donation of love when I was growing up, but now that I think about it, every time Brasky's name was brought up at the supper table, my father would reach over hand hold my mother's gnarled stump and they both would brandish a warm, nostalgic smile. I think it was great for both of them.

10/29/2004 7:15:08 PM

Yes.....this is true...except that Brasky was so in love with me that the thought of there being less of me was reason enough to leave me with all my fingers (and the rest of my body for that matter)

10/29/2004 7:20:34 PM

bill brasky sent me an email that said your two cents wouldnt buy a penny

10/29/2004 8:55:01 PM

brasky stories should never span the length of more than one post n00b.

get it right.

of face brasky.

10/29/2004 9:03:00 PM

brasky broke every one of my vertebrae in my spine for typing "of" instead of "or"

10/29/2004 10:33:31 PM

Quote :

"Bill Brasky picked on Hitler on the playground at their primary school. Hitler's shame led to genocide, which was stopped by Brasky transforming into Eva Braun, getting Hitler to fall in love with him, and led him to a bunker, where he revealed himself. Brasky raped Hitler, yelling "Mein Bitch" for all 38 minutes. Hitler swore the rape was beauty personified. He died of a broken heart, as well as a punctured colon, bruised kidney, and internal bleeding."

p.s.

that was awful.

10/29/2004 10:37:07 PM

Has any one noticed, there's 12 pages of this stuff! LOL

10/29/2004 10:42:58 PM

LOL, LOL yeah one more and it will be a bakers dozen LOL

10/29/2004 10:44:28 PM

i need to re-read all of this

10/29/2004 10:56:33 PM

Wow, this thread has gone downhill on page 12. We need poopface to revitalize it with one if his epic Brasky tales...

10/30/2004 2:26:37 AM

i spread the word of brasky today at work.

10/30/2004 2:30:21 AM

Did I ever tell you that Brasky was executive producer on GoldenEye? Anyway, Brasky got that position by threatening to beat the other filmmakers up. His first order was that his son do the 'jumping off the dam' stunt. Before the shot Brasky pulled his son aside and, with tears in his eyes, said "Son, I just want you to know I'm proud of you." Well the kid jumps off the dam and when his bungee pulls tight he slams right into the side of the dam. Sure enough he was dead and Brasky leans over the edge and yells "That's what happens to little boys who don't eat their vegetables!"

10/30/2004 2:32:53 AM

hahahahahhahahahahaha

he didnt even ask me for help with that one!!!

10/30/2004 2:34:06 AM

nigga plz

10/30/2004 2:34:34 AM

and it is saved

10/30/2004 2:34:39 AM

Brasky once ate an entire Girl Scout troop after they knocked on his door to sell him cookies while he was having sex with my wife. He gave all the dead Girl Scout's cookies to charity, except for Tagalongs, because he really likes those.

10/30/2004 2:42:45 AM

So Brasky and me were drinking heavily as usual and watching tv when Pretty Woman came on. So we watched it, we laughed, we cried, we saw it again. Anyways, afterwards, Brasky and me head out to the downtown looking for a little action. Brasky walks up to the first hooker he finds and punches his fist into her chest and pulls out her still beating heart. He looked at it, threw it away and said "Nope. Not gold." So we spent the entire evening like that, randomly killing prostitutes. By the end of the evening, Brasky had managed to amass a collection of no less than 3 solid gold hooker hearts.

10/30/2004 2:44:35 AM

So last night Brasky was at home and the trick-or-treaters would come by. Instead of giving out candy though, he would kick the kids in the stomach. Then he would rape their fathers and mothers. People were lined up to go trick-or-treating at Brasky's. His neighborhood even declared that next year people will go "kick-or-raping" instead of trick-or-treating.

11/1/2004 5:23:01 PM

Bill Brasky built a time machine, went back in time, and impregnated Mary while Joseph was at work.

11/1/2004 5:29:03 PM

bill brasky is the electoral process.

11/1/2004 5:34:58 PM

so did that one suck?

or you all were too lazy to keep it going.

DO I NEED TO STEP UP MY BRASKY GAME

11/1/2004 11:52:27 PM

nah it was good, but would have been bad say a year ago or a year from now.

Here's one I bet you didn't know:

The saying "An apple a day keeps the doctor away" can be attributed to Brasky...except instead of apple he meant ass raping and instead of doctor he meant any man.

11/2/2004 11:37:46 AM

Bill Brasky sleeps on a bed made of cadavers, once a week he has fresh dead people brought in to fluff the spots that are slipping

well one night, Brasky got drunk and made me spoon with him, and i'll tell you; it is amazing unless you wind up laying on a face that has started decomposing and you can feel the teeth; there are few king size beds that offer that much comfort

[Edited on November 2, 2004 at 11:45 AM. Reason : TO BILL BRASKY]

11/2/2004 11:44:47 AM

I can still recall ol Brasky, getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to that old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped, he'd yell, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy, Brasky told us we had some growing up to do.

11/2/2004 11:48:07 AM

We used to laugh at ol Brasky, when he'd wake up at the ass-crack of dawn, pound a gallon of Jack Daniels and go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening, when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town. We were instructed by Brasky that to pick up a quality whore, one must use zebra urine and a plate of enchiladas.

11/2/2004 12:18:16 PM

are you making this up? i dont remember half of this crap, and i think i have all the bill brasky videos on my computer

11/2/2004 12:19:42 PM

yes


and that Phil Collins was a real son of bitch too, Johnny

11/2/2004 12:20:52 PM

Bill Brasky invented celebrex in his basement, using only the soul of al roker, a bathtub full of petroleum jelly, and eleven gallons of sweat

he got those gallons of sweat by repeatedly wringing the necks of small philipino boys

ah, Brasky and his phillipinos

11/2/2004 12:21:03 PM

I had actually never seen a Phillipino until Brasky cooked me up one for dinner a couple months ago. He was a tender, succulant little thing...

11/2/2004 3:12:55 PM

Brasky and I were having a few beers with some of Braskys friends. That night Brasky was unusually talkative. Brasky's buddy Dill asked him what was up with the motormouth. Sure enough brasky opened his mouth and inside was purring a 5.0l hemi engine.

11/4/2004 10:56:50 AM

I am a real son of a bitch!

11/4/2004 11:02:44 AM

It is said that if Brasky were to ever need a pacemaker, it would have to be powered by nuclear fission and would put out enough power to reverse the flow of Niagra Falls. Even then he would be limited to raping only 3 men per day.

11/4/2004 12:02:52 PM

Quote :

"5.0l hemi"

no such thing

11/4/2004 12:26:51 PM

exactly

11/4/2004 12:27:13 PM

wow that brasky gets me again

11/4/2004 1:07:23 PM

Quote :

"I can still recall ol Brasky, getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to that old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped, he'd yell, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy, Brasky told us we had some growing up to do."

oh now youre just quoting jack handy.


TO BRASKY

11/4/2004 2:24:42 PM

ahhh, but Bill Brasky is Jack Handy!

11/4/2004 10:00:33 PM

Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky met the President? He met Reagan over 80 times. Turns out it was the repeated exposure to Brasky's handshake that caused Reagan's Alzheimer’s.

11/7/2004 10:10:47 PM

Bill Brasky once had a seat on the Jewish Sanhedrin but was removed after the imfamous Buttsex of Arimethea occurance

11/9/2004 4:46:29 PM

Brasky installed a trailer hitch on his tailbone so he could pull his travel trailer. His fuel economy is much improved as he gets about 40 miles to the gallon (of scotch)

11/9/2004 4:50:03 PM

The Pope told Brasky it was okay for him to have a mistress

11/9/2004 4:51:18 PM

oh shit, sis is gettin in on the Brasky, it must be in the bloodline

11/9/2004 4:52:16 PM

Bill Brasky founded the Mayan civilization when Ancient Europe ran out of scotch

11/9/2004 5:15:33 PM

Brasky had a bit part in Iron Eagle 4: Back on Attack. He did it as a favor to Lou Gossett Jr.

11/9/2004 5:25:04 PM

I heard he can tread water for 3 days, and he only sleeps once a week

11/9/2004 5:26:29 PM