WORK WORK WORK

DERP DERP DERP

They rhyme. Coincidence?

8/8/2010 6:58:25 PM

FUCK.

8/8/2010 7:00:53 PM

i would kill for some boneless wings & a pint of ice cream. but i already ate a bunch of crap today.



[Edited on August 8, 2010 at 7:07 PM. Reason : ]

8/8/2010 7:02:37 PM

lololol this video of me on Facebook brings back memories.

8/8/2010 7:36:27 PM

*scowls*

I do not want to go to the store to buy cat food. I told my damned husband that he would need to buy some while I was gone this weekend, but did he? NO.

8/8/2010 7:37:32 PM

sooooooooooo hungry

8/8/2010 7:38:13 PM

My outside running shoes are wet. So I either have to wear my shitty old old falling apart shoes or my white ones that are still nice and clean. Decisions.

8/8/2010 7:44:47 PM

Obviously, you were not meant to run today.

8/8/2010 7:45:25 PM

Life is so hard!

Imma wear my old ones.

Also for some reason I typed fire instead of life when I was writing that. Odd.

Also why the fuck does Gus seem hell bent on getting on top of the liquor cabinet?

8/8/2010 7:49:06 PM

^ He wants to get crunk, obviously!

8/8/2010 7:53:29 PM

where the hell are my nail clippers

8/8/2010 8:04:33 PM

haha, wtf, Xibit is on extreme makeover home edition

8/8/2010 8:15:26 PM

Free sex for everyone!

8/8/2010 8:16:01 PM

Totally hate my husband 2nite.

8/8/2010 8:40:31 PM

^ what's wrong, friend? Talk to me.

8/8/2010 8:41:13 PM

Conversation:

Erica: "Did anyone call while I was gone?"
Josh: *silence*
Erica: "Well...?"
Josh: "I SAID NO."
Erica: "Your mouth didn't even move!"

This happens all the damned time. He's constantly claiming that he answers my questions, but I don't see or hear a peep out of him. Then he gets mad because he says that I just don't pay attention. Well, he's either a ventriloquist or a dummy. I vote for dummy.

8/8/2010 8:45:59 PM

KICK HIM IN THE FACE

8/8/2010 8:46:32 PM

With the number of ticks I've been around today I probably should have taken a shower before touching my cats. Oops.

8/8/2010 8:48:25 PM

I SO WANT TO


I'm actually starting to wonder if he's typing his responses on the computer and thinks that he said them out loud.

8/8/2010 8:48:47 PM

i've done that before.

8/8/2010 8:50:09 PM

Just calm down. Be patient. I know what he did was rude... but at the end of the day, it's not so important, right?


After calming down, I would advise talking to him and letting him know that your messages are important to you, and that you aren't some psychic that can read his mind. Yes, that means that he actually has to talk to his wife.

Then, suck his dick. All men like having their dick sucked.

8/8/2010 8:52:12 PM

^ holy shit. This guy is awesome.

8/8/2010 8:53:30 PM

My husband included, but NOT when he's playing on the computer.
Trust me.

8/8/2010 8:58:44 PM

I think that you've mentioned that before.

And I believe you.

But I do find it very hard to believe. I mean, goddamn...even if I was playing the most awesome video game ever, and my wife came up to me and said:

"Hey baby.... I've been thinking.... and I've realized that I just haven't been sucking your dick enough. SOOOO, I'm turning over a new leaf right now. Drop 'em"

The absolute LAST thing that I would say would be "JESUS CHRIST WOMAN, WTF?! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I'M PLAYING A GAME HERE? OMG, I WISH I HAD NEVER MARRIED YOU!!1 "

8/8/2010 9:03:05 PM

new true blood!!

but holy actual shit this medicine wrecks my tummy.

8/8/2010 9:03:42 PM

Well, it's not like the blow job fairy makes herself scarce in this relationship.

8/8/2010 9:04:25 PM

I do not doubt that, and that's how I know that you're a very loving, compassionate, dedicated, and caring wife.

I've....I've debated on stealing you away and keeping you for myself. I haven't quite come up with the plan to seduce you though....

8/8/2010 9:05:51 PM

Get in line, buddy.

8/8/2010 9:06:25 PM

blowjobs

8/8/2010 9:06:45 PM

^^ I've skipped in line, thx

8/8/2010 9:10:46 PM

Young lady, you'll never keep a man with that attitude.

8/8/2010 9:11:26 PM

I told her that!

then she bit me

8/8/2010 9:12:00 PM

Owie!

8/8/2010 9:12:50 PM

i've received plenty of pms from males who think they can convince me i like it

8/8/2010 9:13:24 PM

Prepare to fire giant boob nipple gun!

8/8/2010 9:13:37 PM

Blowjobs is not what keeps me with a woman. It's their eyes and the kindness... A woman needs not give a real man blowjobs to have and hold him.

8/8/2010 9:14:11 PM

8/8/2010 9:15:30 PM

Ok. Stephen, you're officially gay.

Twoozles, just slob that knob with some flavored lube, close your eyes, and go to town.

8/8/2010 9:16:13 PM

Quote :

"Ok. Stephen, you're officially gay."

So if I had said, "Oh, if a woman wants to keep a man, she better learn how to live out of a kitchen because no man is going to stay with a woman who doesn't stay in the kitchen and make sandwhiches, muffins, and pancakes..." would this redeem my lost man points?

8/8/2010 9:18:50 PM

flavored lube?

8/8/2010 9:19:44 PM

With a statement like that, you might be able to recoup 1/2 of your losses.

Who honestly stays with someone because of their eyes?
Girls, that's who.

^^ Yes, flavored lube. Or honey, or chocolate, or fuckin' ketchup if that's your bag, lady.

[Edited on August 8, 2010 at 9:22 PM. Reason : .]

8/8/2010 9:21:06 PM

I wish I had more cortizone cream...6 mosquito bites from last night and 5 are on one leg...

also why would somebody decide to leave a broken bottle in the middle of the sidewalk????

8/8/2010 9:21:17 PM

[Edited on August 8, 2010 at 9:22 PM. Reason : .]

8/8/2010 9:22:09 PM

oh snap. stephen got called out.

8/8/2010 9:22:59 PM

KETCHUP!?!

8/8/2010 9:24:24 PM

these noises

8/8/2010 9:24:43 PM

lol

8/8/2010 9:24:43 PM

Look I said kindness too. I know it's the internet, but folks, lets try not to take this too seriously lol.

8/8/2010 9:25:02 PM

Hey, you're the one who as making faces at flavored lube. I figured that maybe you didn't like sweet things.



I just know that if I was with a guy who thought: Eating pussy? That I would think twice about being with that guy. If you love someone, you like doing things that make them happy.

[Edited on August 8, 2010 at 9:26 PM. Reason : .]

8/8/2010 9:25:17 PM

Ketchup. hahaha. Remember when they were making that stuff in different colors, like green and yellow? lol... I don't see those on store shelves anymore... Oh the things kids these days are missing out on...

^

Quote :

"Eating pussy? "

>_> yeaaahhh... Call it a guilty pleasure, if you want, but I enjoy it...

[Edited on August 8, 2010 at 9:27 PM. Reason : .]

8/8/2010 9:26:40 PM