she looks like she maybe 105 pounds, if she gained 40 pounds some seroius shit would be wrong.

5/25/2006 9:55:14 PM

If I gained 40 pounds I'd hope that my husband/boyfriend/whatever would point it out to me. Because seriously, to gain that much and not care enough to stop it would mean having some kind of problem.

5/25/2006 9:59:12 PM

Quote :

""as far as marriage goes, looks should be the last thing to do with the relationship.""

um...what kind of a marriage would I have if I'm not attracted to my wife?! If that's the case...then super models should have no problem marrying me!!

5/25/2006 10:01:12 PM

^yeah, thats idealistic bullshit spewed by a naif.

^^Its not that most women "don't care", it's that they don't have the willpower/self control to counter the forces that cause them to gain weight as they get older.

[Edited on May 25, 2006 at 10:02 PM. Reason : 2]

5/25/2006 10:01:34 PM

Opperative term = Love

I don't think it should matter.... I'm not saying I'd wish for it to happen, but in the scheme of how you feel about the person, it shouldn't make a difference

From the opposite end of the spectrum(female to male), I've been with someone who gained 60 pounds while I was with them. And also someone who gained 30ish.... It never made the slightest difference in how I felt about them, nor how turned on I was by them. Maybe I just need to cook a little more on the healthy side?!?

5/25/2006 10:07:13 PM

Didn't read the thread, but

What would you have to do with her weight? In my eyes a woman who stays thin to bag a man is the type who will gain a ton of weight after they have one. I'm not talking about the gradual weight you put on with age, but rapid weight gain. I know personally that I like to look good for me, first and foremost. Having my spouse/significant other find me attractive is the fringe benefit. I think gaining a lot of weight usually signifies a deeper problem, like depression.

5/25/2006 10:09:32 PM

Quote :

"but in the scheme of how you feel about the person, it shouldn't make a difference"

operative term = shouldn't.


And women are different from men. Fat guys who are really rich or funny can score a hot chick. But it doesn't work in reverse. Men are visually stimulated. Thats just reality.

5/25/2006 10:11:29 PM

Quote :

"Her mom has a great figure...and HOT...if I know she'll end up looking half as good as her, I'd start saving up money for the ring right now. "

Marriage is about a lot more than how a person looks... If you really love her for who she is, not what she looks like now, you would start saving up money to buy her a ring.

And who's to say that you're not the one that will become "unattractive"?

5/25/2006 10:18:49 PM

I get it now....

visually stimulated= shallow

5/25/2006 10:28:49 PM

Does this surprise you at all?

Or did you really think that all the guys who have been chasing you for the last 10 or 15 years were in love with your charming personality?

Honestly, how could this possibly be breaking news?

5/25/2006 10:32:51 PM

It's not initial attraction, but after you care for the person (not just their physical appearance) I would think things drastically change for both sexes.

5/25/2006 10:36:15 PM

^indeed


Claire!!!!!

5/25/2006 10:38:25 PM

girl + 40 lbs = LJBF

Quote :

"If I am not attracted to you, but enjoy talking with you, eating dinner and all, but no sex, then we are friends."

5/25/2006 10:55:29 PM

What if instead of 40,...she said 20, and I gave the same reply.?

[Edited on May 25, 2006 at 10:57 PM. Reason : .]

5/25/2006 10:57:29 PM

still a lot

5/25/2006 11:04:59 PM

what matters is whether or not it bothers YOU
it doesn't matter if its socially acceptable to feel that way
if it bothers you then its going to cause problems in the relationship, whether its shallow for you to feel that way or not.

5/25/2006 11:10:03 PM

^really like your answer

5/25/2006 11:34:40 PM

breastfeeding women generally will lose some weight after pregnancy

but tabbycat is right, you should NOT diet for a while after pregnancy if you are breastfeeding, in fact you are supposed to eat 500 extra calories each day while lactating.


if you have a c section it can take a long damn time for things to rearrange themselves as they should be, and anykind of exercise for several weeks is a no no. you cant even really take the stairs for 2 weeks post c-section.

5/26/2006 3:58:21 AM

^ one might also add, when the hell do you think any new mom is going to *find* time to exercise for the first couple of weeks anyways?

Last I checked, they're gonna be seriously BUSY

Now after that, this doesnt hold, but i'm just sayin.

That and c'mon, if I could have kids, and had one, I wouldnt leave a 1 week old newborn to go to the gym!


[Edited on May 26, 2006 at 9:35 AM. Reason : .]

5/26/2006 9:33:24 AM

I'd have to have a girl, to answer this question.

5/26/2006 9:45:38 AM

don't worry, asian girls don't gain 40 lbs.

5/26/2006 10:01:56 AM

I don't know, some of the ones I've seen around here have been pretty chunky (not that thats a bad thing IF she stays at that exact size, but we all know that won't happen). Guess, I'll have to go out of the country to satisfy my hot Asian girl needs.

5/26/2006 10:06:10 AM

As long as she doesn't get this big--
http://www.guardian.co.uk/russia/article/0,,1783637,00.html

5/26/2006 10:17:51 AM

Coming from a married man, if my wife gained 40lbs in weight, I'd definately lose a lot of physical attraction for her. But, I think my wife knows me well enough to knows when to draw the line. Therefore she tries really hard to watch her weight and eat healthy, though she hates working out.

Personally, I've gained about 15 lbs since being married. I'm about 170 now. And though I'm not grotesquely fat, I do have a nice pudgy belly now and even my wife jokes and makes fun of my ever expanding belly. I take that as, "I know you don't have a six pack anymore, yet I still love you and think your sexy, but don't push it buddy ." So, I know where I need to draw the line as well.

5/26/2006 10:23:57 AM

your fatass should work just as hard to look good for her as she does for you

5/26/2006 10:26:08 AM

^that's a funny comment, because actually my fatarse ran three miles last night for the first time since I've been married... and my fatarse is also super sore this morning

Looking good is hard work ... I hate you Bojangles!!! *waves fist*

5/26/2006 10:32:21 AM

how on earth do you have a belly at 170, im 210 and i have love handles, but no belly

must be short?

5/26/2006 10:34:22 AM

How about this for a change of opinion.

I have been with a few women who have gained 10-15 pounds whole we dated.

I noticed a DEFINITE CHANGE in thier personality and confidence. I venture that gaining weight can also change a persons outlook and personality. My ex would not wear the same clothes, not act in the same way, and then say people could tell she was fat because she was getting treated differently. But is was partially self fullfilling, in that che changed her actions with the weight gain.

I still think that attraction(for men especially) has a lot to do with appearance. If she gains weight and you are not attracted, then you are not.

And I agree with xvang, you have to keep yourself in shape to or face the music when this topic comes up regarding you.

5/26/2006 11:06:51 AM

gaining 20 might be ok if she looks like this now

5/26/2006 11:22:30 AM

Quote :

"i pretty much agree with what you said"

Quote :

"why would you answer a question like that? women ask stupid trick questions like this all the time just dont answer"

no, that's just running from her. shoot straight with her--in addition to other benefits, it'll teach her not to try to trap you with stupid questions that have no right answer.

Quote :

"a 150 lb woman is not going to have weight-related health problems"

dude, unless she's pretty tall, 150 lbs is probably fat. on a lot of girls, that would be really fat.

Quote :

" So, you're giving her between 2-4 weeks to lose 15-35 pounds"

half or more of that weight is baby and fluid retention, which is shed pretty much immediately at birth. still, getting back into shape within 2 months would be a strain at best, i'd think.

5/26/2006 11:33:27 AM

Quote :

"How about this for a change of opinion. I have been with a few women who have gained 10-15 pounds whole we dated. I noticed a DEFINITE CHANGE in thier personality and confidence. I venture that gaining weight can also change a persons outlook and personality. My ex would not wear the same clothes, not act in the same way, and then say people could tell she was fat because she was getting treated differently. But is was partially self fullfilling, in that che changed her actions with the weight gain. "

Seconded.

When your partner is not happy/secure with the way they look it can take a psychological toll on them that will eventually effect you and the relationship as a whole.

5/26/2006 11:52:16 AM

Quote :

"visually stimulated= shallow"

YEAH THAT'S EXACTLY IT YOU FIGURED IT OUT

jesus christ is it possible to make it to 26 and still be this fucking stupid and naive?

It's not that fucking hard to get up and do a bare fucking minimum of physical activity for like 15-20 minutes a day. Everybody can find the time to do this, I don't care who you are... unless you're physically disabled, you can find this time and do it. Whether its some pushups, or some sit ups, or some stretches, some leg lifts... WHATEVER, you can easily find the time.

People who lack the time management, willpower, mental strength, and care to maintain their appearance for their lover are not considerate enough for a mature relationship.

[Edited on May 26, 2006 at 12:10 PM. Reason : .]

5/26/2006 12:09:57 PM

Well, if shes Latino that might be alright. I've seen alot of thick Latino girls who have been smoking. Trick is keeping them at that weight. the first baby and............... In fact a little weight doesn't look bad on alot of girls, IMO. I've seen nice thick white girls, Latino girls, Asian girls, and even a few hot black ones.

5/26/2006 1:55:53 PM

she's chinese:


and yes..i do love showing her off

5/26/2006 2:10:07 PM

azn's dont get fat

5/26/2006 2:11:17 PM

5/26/2006 2:19:38 PM

^^ orly?

5/26/2006 2:47:08 PM

therealramet

gotta say your GF is a total babe.

5/26/2006 2:55:43 PM

saying azns don't get fat is like saying black people don't steal bikes

5/26/2006 3:04:54 PM

As long as your gf understands that's all that matters. My husband is probably around 15lbs overweight and he definitely feels it physically, much less 40lbs.

I've gained 20 lbs since entering college, and people can't believe I weigh 130-ish so I can't imagine how small I looked when I was 111. So yes, gaining some weight is good for some people. Not that I was unhealthy then, only much leaner. I've basically just filled out. But I can definitely tell when I'm approaching 135+ because I can feel the physical effects just at that small of a weight gain. So I couldn't imagine how miserable it'd be like with 40 more lbs. I can imagine your gf would feel the same way.

5/26/2006 7:08:20 PM

Quote :

"half or more of that weight is baby and fluid retention, which is shed pretty much immediately at birth. "

I subtracted from that. Assuming your female is of average weight and size, she is going to probably gain anywhere from 20-35 pounds...if she swells a lot or has some problem (like preeclampsia) she could gain up to 50 pounds or more. Some women actually don't lose that much weight after giving birth, whereas some women do. It all depends on how much you swell and how big your baby is. You can exercise after your 6-week check up and the doctor gives you the thumbs up, but really you aren't supossed to exercise until your follow-up appointment. Plus, ncsutiger is right...when do new moms have time to exercise? Newborns typically sleep around 2-3 hours at a time around the clock and most moms use that time to recooperate, sleep, or to clean the house and get stuff ready for when the baby wakes up again.

[Edited on May 26, 2006 at 7:32 PM. Reason : a]

[Edited on May 26, 2006 at 7:33 PM. Reason : b]

5/26/2006 7:32:29 PM

Quote :

"The majority of marital problems stem from sexual dissatisfaction. And no, I didn't pull that out of my ass."

but did you pull out of her ass?

girls dont like cum in their ass

5/26/2006 9:53:30 PM

If you marry her she will gain 40 pounds at some point down the road, and you will too, and then you both will die.

Mike

5/26/2006 10:23:01 PM

your gf is asian...everyone knows asian women stay skinny

5/26/2006 10:23:16 PM

i dont know man....im really afriad that once we get married, she's just gonna not care and blow up. She knows I'm not even gonna think about a divorce until all hell breaks loose.

5/27/2006 1:36:29 PM

gonna be big trouble with little china (girl)

5/27/2006 1:42:01 PM

dude man, all girls get mom-butt sooner or later.

5/27/2006 4:41:04 PM

bought that for my mom last christmas

[Edited on May 27, 2006 at 4:47 PM. Reason : 1600 w00t]

5/27/2006 4:46:50 PM

Forty pounds of fat is nothing next to forty years of aging.

5/27/2006 4:47:32 PM

set em up

5/27/2006 5:05:43 PM