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10/24/2007 12:54:14 AM

about the dirtiest thing I got hit with at the final hearing was having to pay $1700 in back child support and medical expenses...it was dirty because the child support was money that she hadn't needed (by her own admission, off the record), and the medical bills were from a couple of doctors visits when she'd stubbornly taken our daughter to be seen at a civilian doctor that wasn't approved (instead of to the completely free Navy hospital).

Basically, it was her way of getting me to help her pay for legal expenses that she couldn't really afford, but without calling it that (because I flatly told both of our lawyers and the mediator that I'd never voluntarily pay her fuckhead lawyer a single cent. She'd have to take me back to the judge for another court hearing and get it awarded, and even then, I'd probably make her go through the trouble of having it garnished from my pay if I could do so without it costing me my security clearance).

However, I knew that I didn't have any chance at all of preventing the back child support from being awarded in court, so I agreed to pay it as a bargaining chip to get her to agree to something else. However, my lawyer and I decided to have it specifically written into the order that I would deliver this payment in person the next day (which happened to be my last day in FL before moving to WA) when I went to her house to pick up my daughter for the day (as up until that point, she'd always found some way to prevent me from having my daughter during the times ordered by the court...wednesday nights, every other weekend, and anytime during the day when she was at work anyway). Well, sure enough, neither my daughter nor her mother (nor her grandmother) were anywhere to be found when I showed up the next day. They wouldn't answer their phones. I dropped off the check anyway, because I've always made it a point to do EVERYTHING by the book so nobody can find even a speck of dirt to bring up on me.

To make a long story short, I finally found my daughter being babysat at a neighbor's house. I called my lawyer to have baby's mom charged with contempt of court, but since the judge hadn't signed the order yet, she hadn't technically done anything illegal.

I did call my bank (USAA) to cancel that $1700 check, though. I figured that (a) we'd had the order written that way for this specific reason, and (b) in addition to being OK legally by stopping payment on the check, I knew she couldn't very well go stir shit up in court about it, because she wouldn't want to explain to the judge about how she'd violated the agreement and HID MY DAUGHTER from me on my last day in town before I moved 3000 miles away--not to mention a bunch of other occassions.


The bad part is that my daughter just turned ONE YEAR OLD, and I have only ONCE gotten to keep her by myself, and that was for about a single 2 hour period.

[Edited on October 24, 2007 at 1:04 AM. Reason : asdfasd]




I thought I knew what hatred was, but I had no idea until I met her lawyer. Even other lawyers consider him despicable. I mean EVERY lawyer (to include the "impartial" mediator we had) hates him and has no respect for him. I am dead serious when I say that if I found out he died, I would take leave and fly to FL for his funeral so I could spit on his corpse at his wake, then take a shit on his grave.

[Edited on October 24, 2007 at 1:10 AM. Reason : asfasd]

10/24/2007 1:04:10 AM

Quote :

"skokiaan: ^yep, if anyone deserves money from the state, it's the guy who was wrongfully accused. Hell, he deserves some money from the bitch who wrongfully accused him."

Suing the state makes so much sense, not suing the child accuser who is now a woman. I bet she is pretty fucking pissed, too, to find out the man who raped her hasn't served a day for it, and she probably feels pretty bad even though she was just a child...

But it's not clear Dail has a case against the state. Unless the prosecution or the investigators did something unethical or illegal....

It looks like a few similar hairs and an ID from the victim was enough to convict. The guy probably wasn't a model citizen (like anybody is ), and the jury thought he was guilty--beyond a reasonable doubt. I mean, the victim IDed him. Is that the state's fault? And it's not necessarily the state's fault that Dail couldn't afford a super good lawyer to defend him to the max. This is the best justice we've been able to come up with. Sure, shit happens to the innocent (mostly the poor innocent), but we still maintain the ability to nail the guilty.

Wrongful convictions are inevitable. To eliminate the possibility of wrongful convictions would require reducing our justice system to an even more laughable, ineffective institution. There are steps we can take to decrease the possibility of wrongful convictions though, and I'll let the lawyers talk on that.

Anyway, since wrongful convictions are inevitable, we need to be prepared to shell out the cash. A lot more than $20,000/year. Now I don't like the idea of putting a young person in prison for twenty years, and then handing them a wad of cash and sending them on their way...but there's no fair alternative.

And this little game the state/city play--offering a small sum and hoping they won't get sued--is ridiculous... But if the state offered a fair amount up front, the victims couldn't justify a suit, and the attorneys couldn't get rich representing them...and then who would donate to the lawmakers' political campaigns?

[Edited on October 24, 2007 at 1:48 AM. Reason : sss]

10/24/2007 1:38:03 AM

Have you ever noticed that Congress has something like a ~20% approval rating...

but you don't hear jokes about a million Congressmen at the bottom of the ocean?

10/24/2007 1:40:43 AM

^^^That's some fucked up shit. I'd hate the girl for hiding the daughter as a way to get back at you.

I thought you got to see your daughter for a week though.

10/24/2007 9:45:06 AM

$20,000 a year seems pretty fair. he got to live/eat for free, so that has to factor in somewhere. not saying it was $10 meals, but i bet he wasn't suffering. someone said he was only making 3.50/hour...well, add in the free living expenses and hes doing alright. 40 years old and he shouldn't have to work anymore if he plays his cards right. man has never had to really work his entire life.

though, given the chance to follow his road, or mine where i'll be working in my 60's, i'd probably still choose mine.

10/24/2007 10:04:23 AM

Quote :

"40 years old and he shouldn't have to work anymore if he plays his cards right."

By "Play your cards right" do you mean live in a box, eat ramen noodles, and don't pay your taxes for the rest of your life?

10/24/2007 10:06:56 AM

um, no....i'm pretty sure i could make 360k work for me

10/24/2007 10:08:44 AM

10/24/2007 3:02:19 PM

I'm all for women getting child support. Heck, I'm still trying to get mine.

But if she wanted money, she should've gone to court while he was in prison. Most states have programs set up to allow prisoners to work to pay for child support. Doing so now just makes her look like a greedy bitch.

10/24/2007 3:45:20 PM

Not sure if this has been mentioned already but I think she's mad at him and his son. The son went to live with the Dad now that he's out of jail.

10/24/2007 3:53:03 PM

Quote :

"but i bet he wasn't suffering"

i've heard that being an accused rapist in jail isn't easy

10/24/2007 5:42:44 PM

Did she get any government money (AFDC, etc) while he was in prison?

If so, should she have to pay it back if he pays her back child support?

10/24/2007 5:55:47 PM

Quote :

"The bad part is that my daughter just turned ONE YEAR OLD, and I have only ONCE gotten to keep her by myself, and that was for about a single 2 hour period."

Damn

10/24/2007 8:14:43 PM

TheDuke866's story ought to be required reading if we are going to stick to abstinence only education!

10/24/2007 8:28:18 PM

I say the state should give her child support....not his fault he was wrongly convicted

10/24/2007 8:31:51 PM

Women who falsely accuse a man of rape should have to repay all damages that they suffer as a result of the accusation. They should pay even if they are a minor and even if they are mistaken. I think a woman should have to be pretty damn sure before she cries rape against someone.

You can't give someone 18 years of their life back.

10/24/2007 9:00:55 PM

Quote :

"I'd hate the girl for hiding the daughter as a way to get back at you. I thought you got to see your daughter for a week though. "

She wasn't hiding my daughter to get back at me for anything.

I don't exactly know what her reason is for trying to prevent my access to our daughter (unless she's around). I thought for a while it was just overprotective new mother syndrome, but I don't know.

and I get 2 weeks of visitation every other month until I get to NC, then I get 1 week per month...I just haven't done it yet for a variety of reasons, the biggest being that the final order is just now being completed (her fucking lawyer sat on it for a couple months and wouldn't return phone calls to my lawyer).

Quote :

"40 years old and he shouldn't have to work anymore if he plays his cards right. man has never had to really work his entire life. though, given the chance to follow his road, or mine where i'll be working in my 60's, i'd probably still choose mine. "

Are you kidding? $360,000 is not enough to retire on at 40 years old. Not unless you consider living in a tent, eating cat food, and/or dying very young to be "playing your cards right."

Quote :

"um, no....i'm pretty sure i could make 360k work for me "

I'm pretty sure you have no idea what you're talking about and haven't done the math.

Quote :

"TheDuke866's story ought to be required reading if we are going to stick to abstinence only education! "

Dude, i've heard plenty of stories more fucked up than mine. The family law system is a fucking abomination.

10/24/2007 9:54:44 PM

^alright, so i was a little off on my math. however, invested the right way, it will definitely be a nice supplemental check to a full or part time job. you have to give me that?!?

10/25/2007 8:24:06 AM

Quote :

"they should have a special ceremony, with all the pomp and circumstance of an event such as a ribbon-cutting, at which he gets to flat out punch her in the face with everything he has"

10/25/2007 8:32:47 AM

that bit tho on tv of him is funny shit...

10/25/2007 8:33:12 AM

this shouldn't be a big deal

if i were him, i'd sue the state for WAY more than 360,000 and be more than happy to pay moms for back child support

10/25/2007 8:40:17 AM

^^^^ oh, for sure (although, without crunching the numbers, i'd say he'll need a full time job and still a fair rate of saving in order to accumulate enough wealth to comfortably retire at a normal age).

^ true, but then she'll just sue him for more money.

[Edited on October 25, 2007 at 9:51 AM. Reason : asdf]

10/25/2007 9:50:46 AM

I was a little confused by the article......is his son a pre-"rape" kid or the result of the "rape"?

10/25/2007 10:19:22 AM

if he was on child support before he went to prison he would have to pay a REARAGE, but you can't be liable for child support payments for past time if you were not on child support.

Quote :

"this shouldn't be a big deal if i were him, i'd sue the state for WAY more than 360,000 and be more than happy to pay moms for back child support"

it a law to get on 20k a year you exonerated prison time. he can make a separate law suit however for punitive damages.

[Edited on October 25, 2007 at 10:22 AM. Reason : asdf]

10/25/2007 10:21:36 AM

Quote :

"Are you kidding? $360,000 is not enough to retire on at 40 years old. Not unless you consider living in a tent, eating cat food, and/or dying very young to be "playing your cards right." "

If he invested the 360k and got 10% a year back, he would make 36k per year. It's not a lot of money, but people make it work. It all depends on what lifestyle you are willing to live with.

I personally would invest all of it, and keep a job for a while. The 36k per year would be a pretty good supplimental income.

10/25/2007 10:23:02 AM

Quote :

"No, I'm not. Shitty timing, but I'm sure she footed the bill for years without his help: that's some bullshit, too. I feel bad for the guy, but that shouldn't let him shirk his financial responsibility to his kid."

she should sue the state for wrongfully convicted her child's father and he couldn't help her take care fo the child. its the state's fault and they should pay. she is a fucking idiot btw.

10/25/2007 10:24:39 AM

Quote :

"If he invested the 360k and got 10% a year back, he would make 36k per year. "

Actually most professionals advise you withdraw 4 maybe 5 percent at most when depending upon a nest egg for income. That way you can handle the market swings.

10/25/2007 10:27:14 AM

invest this money my ass

i would buy me a 140k house, and brand car and get me a decent job. no mortgage payment or car payment is an investment within itself. screw all of this other stuff. unless you can handle this money on your own there is no need to invest or let someone invest for you.

[Edited on October 25, 2007 at 10:29 AM. Reason : sdfg]

10/25/2007 10:28:35 AM

Quote :

"I was a little confused by the article......is his son a pre-"rape" kid or the result of the "rape"?"

pre-"rape" kid

10/25/2007 10:29:09 AM

Quote :

"invest this money my ass i would buy me a 140k house"

Why would you pay off the entire house when you can get a tax deductible loan for the house at 6% and easily make more than that in the market?

10/25/2007 10:30:41 AM

because its easier and i don't care about having all this money and being greedy.

10/25/2007 10:31:15 AM

How is that being greedy?

10/25/2007 10:31:44 AM

haha, thanks elkay........ I felt invisible




PS- Finally at 100

10/25/2007 10:31:54 AM

its greedy because you don't need all of that to live comfortable, and probably more or a headache than help. and too why risk defaulting when you can just pay for the shit. in HIS situation i would not think about investing one penny.

[Edited on October 25, 2007 at 10:34 AM. Reason : sfth]

10/25/2007 10:33:02 AM

How can you live comfortable off of 18K a year?

10/25/2007 10:34:08 AM

no mortgage payment or car payment, and making 20k a year would be fine to me and many others. if you don't believe me, give it to me

[Edited on October 25, 2007 at 10:36 AM. Reason : dh]

10/25/2007 10:35:03 AM

Where would that 20K come from?

10/25/2007 10:36:54 AM

he can get a job somewhere. places like perdue farms hire people like this all day everyday.

10/25/2007 10:38:10 AM

Having a job doesn't sound very comfortable to me.

10/25/2007 10:41:19 AM

well maybe not for you, and i can understand that. but for normal people like me having a job is cool.

10/25/2007 10:42:42 AM

Heh "normal people"

10/25/2007 10:44:11 AM

normal is realtive. an idiot is smart to a bigger idiot, so the idiot is normal to the bigger idiot.

10/25/2007 10:45:00 AM

Did you just cal yourself an idiot?

10/25/2007 10:46:20 AM

yeah and i called you the bigger idiot

10/25/2007 10:46:49 AM

Quote :

"$20,000 a year seems pretty fair. he got to live/eat for free, so that has to factor in somewhere. not saying it was $10 meals, but i bet he wasn't suffering. someone said he was only making 3.50/hour...well, add in the free living expenses and hes doing alright. 40 years old and he shouldn't have to work anymore if he plays his cards right. man has never had to really work his entire life. "

dumbest thing i have ever read on TWW

seedless

liquid cash is the most valuable thing you can have and it would likely earn a hell of a lot more in investments than appreciation on the property. you would essentially be giving money away.

10/25/2007 10:47:05 AM

^ i understand all that jazz but do you really think it a good idea for THIS guy to invest? i don't, say me or you yeah.

10/25/2007 10:48:34 AM

this woman does deserve what is owed for child support

I'm not sure that $360,000 is the right amount, however

what I don't understand is how the child is still a minor if he's been in jail for 18 years
did he mail her a sandwich baggy of sperm?

10/25/2007 10:48:57 AM

he deserve to be paid by the state man. its not like he actually did a crime to go to prison. the state fucked up and they should be sued for it. anyway, this suit won't walk a mile.

10/25/2007 10:51:32 AM

Quote :

"^ i understand all that jazz but do you really think it a good idea for THIS guy to invest? i don't, say me or you yeah."

i dont understand why he should be incapable of being a good investor...because he went to jail? im sure he would hire someone to consult him on what to do.

i agree that this lady is owed something but i dont think she is owed it by the wrongfully imprisoned man. the state should compensate her on the child support because they are the ones the deprived her of it by incarcerating the innocent man.

10/25/2007 10:52:18 AM