Catch 22 Veteran 204 Posts user info edit post |
2girls1cup
^^^^uh. not really. i'd say the gross oversimplification would be to reduce me as a person solely to my sexuality. but its understandable from someone who hasnt really spent time examining these things. i, myself, have only recently begun to thoroughly examine gender which is an extremely broad classification more than just male/female which encompasses pretty much everything we do, although it seems to be changing to a certain extent.
its really hard to describe, but basically in social interactions and the way i feel inside i should have been a girl. ive never felt right. i hesitate to use the term "born in the wrong body" because i never felt like it wasnt my body, but i can see where that term comes from. ive read though that gender dysphoria is a brain condition where the brain doesnt match the body for any number of unknown reasons. but its 99% easier to change the body than it is to change the brain. unfortunately, many trans people have trouble coming to terms with this and thats why the suicide rate is so much higher than almost any other group of people. i know i have and continue to struggle with it.
all of this has no bearing on sexual orientation however and i still love girls. i suppose looking back my attraction has always been more of an emotional attraction and less of a physical one than typical males. im sure there are plenty of girls that would take me as i am now, but ive never really felt comfortable enough with myself
Quote : | "If you could change society, instead of changing yourself, how would you change it?" |
i suppose i would make people more accepting first of all. after that, it would be nice if people realized gender is a spectrum and not a black and white male/female deal. it's hard to say what i would change though to be honest because one thing i think about, and i assume other trans people also think about, is whether it would be easier to accept ourselves if we could lay ourselves out there completely without fear of our personal safety or if our desire to change our bodies to match our minds is totally independent of that fact. sometimes it feels like its a battle between who i want to be and what society will accept me as and im forced to make a compromise somewhere in the middle. as you can probably imagine its terribly confusing and takes up much more of my day than it should
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:10 AM. Reason : ]11/15/2010 5:01:52 AM |
FAI756843 All American 908 Posts user info edit post |
you truly are a catch 22...
good luck on your endeavors 11/15/2010 5:07:32 AM |
Supplanter supple anteater 21831 Posts user info edit post |
physical sex: female - intersex - male
gender identity: female - male
alignment of sex/gender: transgender (meaning your sex & gender don't start out aligned) - cisgender (meaning your sex & gender you were born w/ line up)
sexual orientation: straight - bi - gay
Not sure if that is the best description, but there are a number of continuums on which traits related to sex, gender, and orientation can fall, that are often easily confused in everyday language, and there are a wide variety of options... and where you fall on orientation has nothing to do with gender.
Quote : | "If you could change society, instead of changing yourself, how would you change it?" |
I think asking a transgender person that is a bit like asking (probably not the best metaphor, just a quick one off the top of my head) a conjoined twin, instead of separating, how would you change society instead? Its not about societal pressures, if that makes sense? Its about whats right for the person in question.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:17 AM. Reason : .]11/15/2010 5:08:09 AM |
FAI756843 All American 908 Posts user info edit post |
so, you as a guy (as of now) receive pleasure from girls without your dick ?
usually, a guy derives pleasure with this.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:11 AM. Reason : x] 11/15/2010 5:10:12 AM |
BigEgo Not suspended 24374 Posts user info edit post |
I will never understand the concept of being a guy that likes girls and wants to be a girl. Trannies in general don't make much sense to me. 11/15/2010 5:13:02 AM |
Catch 22 Veteran 204 Posts user info edit post |
^^ thats retarded. people derive pleasure from all sorts of things. obviously, the penis is a sexual organ and when it is properly stimulated then yes, i derive pleasure from it. but i also derive pleasure from pleasing my partner much more than normal guys do. i don't think about acting aggressively sexually with girls the way most guys do. i find mutual attraction on all levels a much more appealing idea.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:19 AM. Reason : ] 11/15/2010 5:18:53 AM |
lewisje All American 9196 Posts user info edit post |
in response to the first post in this page, I think I understand, like I have the mentality of a woman (persistent low self-confidence and insecurity about appearance, never wanting to make the first move, being excited at the prospect of being asked out, etc.), and (largely based on gay-bashing as a kid) I have always wished I were born female, but on the other hand this feeling is not so strong and pervasive that I'd consider myself trans
and Supplanter, I'd have pulled out that first image from my "LGBTQA ITT" thread but it's a bit hard to understand at first glance Quote : | "so, you as a guy (as of now) receive pleasure from girls without your dick ?" | the OP answered it beautifully
Quote : | "i also derive pleasure from pleasing my partner much more than normal guys do. i don't think about acting aggressively sexually with girls the way most guys do" | this is how I think too, like even though I have never had sex I am thinking like this
o btw
the hate is real toward those who defy the gender norms, Zinnia doesn't identify as trans but it doesn't matter, having long hair and wearing lipstick and a feather boa are enough: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icf4eipb6A8
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:26 AM. Reason : FTW11/15/2010 5:24:14 AM |
BigEgo Not suspended 24374 Posts user info edit post |
do you get turned on when you hear a filthy bassline?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YmCe3fg7B4w&feature=related turns me the fuck on
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 5:27 AM. Reason : asdf] 11/15/2010 5:24:40 AM |
Supplanter supple anteater 21831 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I will never understand the concept of being a guy that likes girls and wants to be a girl. Trannies in general don't make much sense to me." |
Do you understand why a straight woman might enjoy giving a bj? My guess is probably not, at least not the same kind of understanding that a straight woman has.
Most of us only ever get to understand from personal experience one unique perspective on gender/sex/orientation/etc. I guess in the end that it doesn't matter so much that you or I or anyone truly understand (although trying to understand differences never hurts), all that really matters is that everyone treats each other like human beings.11/15/2010 5:32:18 AM |
Catch 22 Veteran 204 Posts user info edit post |
music can be a huge turn-on. especially bass. to each their own 11/15/2010 5:32:29 AM |
lewisje All American 9196 Posts user info edit post |
^^^dubstep sux, gladja didn't embed it
^^you are the wise one I wasn't kidding when I posted in another thread that you are the best poster on these Internets 11/15/2010 5:35:41 AM |
BigEgo Not suspended 24374 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Do you understand why a straight woman might enjoy giving a bj? My guess is probably not, at least not the same kind of understanding that a straight woman has." |
In related news: Duh.
I didn't disclose this before, but I really could care less about random people being gay/lesbian/into trees, whatever. The only people whose sexual orientation that matter to me are the women I want to bang/be with.
^you sir, have bad taste in music, because this is the internet, and the only valid opinions are my own.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 6:00 AM. Reason : asdf]11/15/2010 6:00:21 AM |
lewisje All American 9196 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "The only people whose sexual orientation that matter to me are the women I want to bang/be with" | it is especially important in that case
once I tried to ask out a woman who seemed friendly to me, only to learn she was a lesbian11/15/2010 6:03:18 AM |
BigEgo Not suspended 24374 Posts user info edit post |
all women that i want to bang and claim they are lesbian are in denial. 11/15/2010 6:42:49 AM |
saps852 New Recruit 80068 Posts user info edit post |
whoa whoa whoa
youre a dude that likes girls but wants to be a chick?? dang...um QUESTIONS
so do you have intercourse with girls? will you still have intercourse with girls even after you get the job done? (i.e. snip or tuck?) Do you like the butch lesbian girls or the dainty lillith fair ones? I think it'd be easier to meet women as a man than a woman, how did that factor into your decision? 11/15/2010 7:27:07 AM |
BobbyDigital Thots and Prayers 41777 Posts user info edit post |
just another attention starved loser.
nothing to see here. 11/15/2010 7:49:47 AM |
Tarpon All American 1380 Posts user info edit post |
I don't care what you do with your sex life honestly, but serious question here. If you have the surgery to create a vagina and then you start having sex with girls..... will you ever use a strap-on dildo? Because then you would just be a hypocrite....... 11/15/2010 7:58:07 AM |
aph319 All American 8570 Posts user info edit post |
Surgery planned? Thought of? What would your ideal persona as the opposite sex be? 11/15/2010 8:03:12 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
You should have stayed on your meds. 11/15/2010 8:12:13 AM |
MinkaGrl01
21814 Posts user info edit post |
awesome. I'm lucky because I was born in the right body, I'm definitely female, so I can't imagine how hard it must be to live and feel like you are the wrong gender, but I do know what it feels like to be an outcast (definitely not to the degree you must feel). Anyways, I have a little motto that may not apply to you but for some weird reason it applies to nearly every road I go down. "If you're gonna be wrong, be strong." For me I think, well fuck I'm wrong and not the way my family/world/society wanted me but I'm going to make wrong the most spectacular spectacular thing I've ever done.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 8:41 AM. Reason : ] 11/15/2010 8:12:32 AM |
ThePeter TWW CHAMPION 37709 Posts user info edit post |
Grats on coming out.
but
I thought lewisje was a chick lesbian, wtf11/15/2010 8:19:11 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
Catch 22 need serious psychological help, not hugs and congrats. 11/15/2010 8:34:46 AM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
Someone never took a psychology class. Of course he will need counseling while going through his change, but he should also be congratulated on him accepting who he is. 11/15/2010 8:54:15 AM |
ALkatraz All American 11299 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I wasn't kidding when I posted in another thread that you are the best poster on these Internets" |
11/15/2010 8:57:50 AM |
ThePeter TWW CHAMPION 37709 Posts user info edit post |
^ 11/15/2010 9:04:50 AM |
sparky Garage Mod 12301 Posts user info edit post |
hold up...so let me get this straight. you feel like a girl, you have the anatomy of a man and dig chicks? what's wrong with just being an emotional man who is in touch with his feelings instead of becoming a transgender person who will be seen in public as lesbian. it seems to me that being seen in the public eye as a straight man will be a happier lifestyle. 11/15/2010 9:20:35 AM |
aimorris All American 15213 Posts user info edit post |
yeah, I don't understand that either. Especially since you said you aren't flamboyant and prefer not dressing up as a woman... do you just really not want a penis that badly? 11/15/2010 9:24:40 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
Don;t try to understand the mind of an insane person. 11/15/2010 9:31:53 AM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
Insane 11/15/2010 9:32:52 AM |
indy All American 3624 Posts user info edit post |
Seems like to me, that social gender (not whether you consider yourself a girl or guy, but whether you are feminine or masculine) is completely separate from sexuality and biological sex.
Considering yourself to be a "guy" or a "girl" is arbitrary and (except for society) unnecessary. If one is masculine, one shouldn't assume that that has anything to do with identifying as a male. If one is feminine, one shouldn't assume that that has anything to do with identifying as a female.
For instance, an effeminate heterosexual male (identifies with feminine things, is effeminate, etc.) shouldn't have to feel that he needs to identify as a female. Why can't he just be an effeminate heterosexual male? (I know that society rejects that, but are we letting society call the shots?)
Why would he feel the need to join the [ultimately arbitrary] male-female dichotomy by becoming [closer to] a biological female? (By cutting off his dick.) Why not simply embrace one's actual gender, forgetting all expectations towards its relationship to biological sex?
I mean, we have tom-boys, and we don't expect them to be lesbian or to have penises... So why can't we have ladymen? (or something)... who dress like and do girly things, have sex with girls, but keep their dicks?
Why would someone need to have different genitalia? (If not for the arbitrary gender role pushed upon them by society) 11/15/2010 9:35:27 AM |
quagmire02 All American 44225 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "hold up...so let me get this straight. you feel like a girl, you have the anatomy of a man and dig chicks? what's wrong with just being an emotional man who is in touch with his feelings instead of becoming a transgender person who will be seen in public as lesbian. it seems to me that being seen in the public eye as a straight man will be a happier lifestyle." |
i agree with you in theory...being a straight effeminate man seems to accomplish the same thing as "i dig chicks but feel like i should be a woman"...i mean, your penis works as advertised, yes? you get wood, do a girl, splooge and it feels good? not sure what the problem is...you can enjoy shoe shopping and wearing makeup, jewelry, whatever if you want
however, i suppose the problem with this is that s/he feels like they should BE a woman and is not happy as a man...i think it goes more deeply than just being a puff11/15/2010 9:36:44 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
No no no - your so right. Lets support a healthy physical person risking her life on painful surgery just because she has a "feeling" that things are not right. Lets support the decision to completely fuck up her life, instead of working on the obvious mental issues.
Also - lets celebrate and support all those pedophiles who have urges. 11/15/2010 9:41:16 AM |
quagmire02 All American 44225 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "No no no - your so right. Lets support a healthy physical person risking her life on painful surgery just because she has a "feeling" that things are not right. Lets support the decision to completely fuck up her life, instead of working on the obvious mental issues." |
well, it's their choice, isn't it? if it's their money and their body and it doesn't affect ME, i don't particularly care what they do...why should you?
i, too, struggle with understanding the "transgendered"...i have no problem with homosexuality...i feel like i understand it as much as a heterosexual CAN understand it, and i accept homosexuals as equals (nothing more or less than i am as a heterosexual)...i do wonder, though, what makes a transgendered person transgendered (it SEEMS psychological, but they probably have some sort of physiological issues that cause the disconnect)11/15/2010 9:49:56 AM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
^So now you are comparing law abiding adults who have never felt normal their entire life and who haven't hurt a soul with pedophiles who ruin lives of children? 11/15/2010 9:50:34 AM |
arcgreek All American 26690 Posts user info edit post |
This thread is worthless w/out pics of op 11/15/2010 9:53:33 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
I'm comparing divalent behavior with divalent behavior.
Quote : | "well, it's their choice, isn't it? if it's their money and their body and it doesn't affect ME, i don't particularly care what they do...why should you?" |
I really don't care - it just bugs me how YOU PEOPLE feel the need to support such an insane and dangerous move.
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 9:56 AM. Reason : i]11/15/2010 9:54:23 AM |
djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
pics, or it didn't happen
no homo 11/15/2010 9:55:21 AM |
arcgreek All American 26690 Posts user info edit post |
also, to whoever doubts a long running con,
there was a several year running con of one of the women here being a Russian
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 9:58 AM. Reason : Quieti (SP?)] 11/15/2010 9:57:38 AM |
quagmire02 All American 44225 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I really don't care" |
!=
11/15/2010 9:58:22 AM |
Metricula Squishie Enthusiast 4040 Posts user info edit post |
Good for you! It's not an easy road but the only way things will get better is visibility. 11/15/2010 10:01:53 AM |
djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
I highly doubt this will hotlink, but it's the best I can do with a quick google search
11/15/2010 10:04:55 AM |
GGMon All American 6462 Posts user info edit post |
How do you not follow the logic? I don;t care if she cuts on her clit - what I do care about is people telling her to be proud and this is a great decision.
These people need counselling, not pride parades and cute little flags. 11/15/2010 10:10:52 AM |
arcgreek All American 26690 Posts user info edit post |
We could do with out this ^^ 11/15/2010 10:12:21 AM |
GREEN JAY All American 14180 Posts user info edit post |
If y'all wanna pass you need the guiding hand of a classy biogirl to style you... please don't settle for the cheapest stuff that you think might fit at the thrift store. Ill fitting clothes, poor style and tragic makeup is outing a bunch of the girls in the gay village. I mean, comedy drag night guys look better than some of these girls who go out on the daily. Maybe they get off on being obvious, but I assume you won't. So, get a good human hair wig and some help with the clothes and makeup before you start goin out. Being bigger isn't necessarily a bad thing either, body shapers can give you a feminine shape much more easily than your thin counterparts. I hope you already have a good job since being a lady is expensive!
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 10:16 AM. Reason : whoa bailey jay ] 11/15/2010 10:12:54 AM |
djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "We could do with out this" |
Oh come on now, if all you saw was the waist up you would totally want to fuck her/him.
You are probably just jealous because she has a bigger dick than you
[Edited on November 15, 2010 at 10:15 AM. Reason : a]11/15/2010 10:14:44 AM |
Spontaneous All American 27372 Posts user info edit post |
Do you have a gender-neutral name? 11/15/2010 10:17:16 AM |
AstralAdvent All American 9999 Posts user info edit post |
Can I be the first in that plastic cooter?
I'm astraladvent and I approved this message. 11/15/2010 10:22:06 AM |
Spontaneous All American 27372 Posts user info edit post |
Oh lawd. 11/15/2010 10:22:48 AM |
GREEN JAY All American 14180 Posts user info edit post |
whats your shoe size? 11/15/2010 10:25:07 AM |
RachelMarie All American 3801 Posts user info edit post |
I know many transgender people. Of course, I do burlesque at Legends and therefore that's a given.
There was a drag queen that performed there once under the name "Deception." I know she's had thousands and thousands of dollars worth of plastic surgery to look like she does. but still, it made me feel insecure about being a real women because she looked so fabulous and I couldn't look that way unless I have thousands of dollars of plastic surgery as well. 11/15/2010 10:28:24 AM |