2

BITCH BE TRIFFLIN'

[Edited on July 24, 2011 at 9:12 AM. Reason : .]

7/24/2011 9:12:22 AM

Even after 6 months of living together, I have never farted in front of the bf, and he has never farted in front of me. But I make it a point not to fart in front of anyone, even family. Respect thing, IMO, though I may be in the minority here.

7/24/2011 10:42:04 AM

Quote :

" and the whiplash is her areola borealis"

Was that meant to be a pun…?

7/24/2011 11:10:25 AM

A long walk on the beach?

Sure! That doesn't sound completely pointless at all.

7/24/2011 11:12:43 AM

dude women be crazy

7/24/2011 12:28:10 PM

Yes that was a pun

7/24/2011 1:36:58 PM

My girl expects me to do the dishes after she cooks. WTF is that?

When doing my laundry, she often mismatches socks that have slightly different colors. Stupid woman.

Whenever she wants to surprise me and picks me up some beer, she often buys a mix-match 6er for variety. Sometimes I don't like some of the flavors. What an idiot.


/sarcasm.

I am actually one of the luckiest men in the world.

7/24/2011 1:48:05 PM

Quote :

"Nah man, I like to pee sitting down. It's relaxing, you should try it."

I'm about a 50/50 at home sitter. I mean, shit I got a lot to do day to day. I'm not gonna feel bad about taking a few minutes out of my day to sit down and relax.

7/24/2011 1:58:07 PM

My bf and I will pee when the other is in the master bath but our toilet is in another room within the bathroom so does that even count? We don't do #2 in front of each other though.

We've been living together for over a year so we're fairly open but we also try not to be purposely gross.

7/24/2011 2:10:22 PM

Quote :

"My girl expects me to do the dishes after she cooks. WTF is that?"

I actually came to post that exactly, no sarcasm. If I work more, why should I have to do dishes while she gets to watch TV?

Am I the only guy that is expected to sacrifice all of my free time for cleaning?

7/24/2011 3:01:21 PM

^ I guess girls think that since they did something for the guy, the guy should help out. Chances are though, if the couple are living together (unless cooking is normally a joint effort), one of them is supporting the other more financially, and should have to do less work otherwise.

Guys, keep posting. Is it bad I'm reading this thread to try to learn what I might be doing to annoy my man?

7/24/2011 3:23:14 PM

My girl preemptively started a thread on tww just to complain about me.

7/24/2011 4:15:15 PM

7/24/2011 4:22:07 PM

I've been married for over 3 years (and we lived together for 3-4 years before getting married) and I've never shit in the same room as my wife, thats just nasty/disrespectful

7/24/2011 4:24:57 PM

When she tells you it's ok to blow inside her without a rubber because she and her husband are trying to get pregnant.

That just takes the cake

[Edited on July 24, 2011 at 4:30 PM. Reason : greg hyeer]

7/24/2011 4:30:00 PM

Quote :

"it's ok to blow inside her without a rubber because she and her husband are trying to get pregnant"

ahahahahaha

7/24/2011 4:44:06 PM

This is funny. If my bf posted here I wonder what he'd say. I probably don't cook enough flavorful meals, I'm more of a meat veggies rice and a bread chef. I also use his razor. Solely. And lately I've been forgetting to wear deodorant and put the cap back on the toofpaste. I'm going to work on all of this by the time we merge sanctimoniously.

In my defense I'm really emotionally neutral and an excellent communicator. I also enjoy watching his shows. But I'll wait for him to fall asleep before putting it on the daily show. He thinks he's a republican.

7/24/2011 4:56:15 PM

meat veggies rice is not mutually exclusive with flavorful. He should be angry!

7/24/2011 6:24:01 PM

To everyone, I also hate your gf and wife because she's always begging for a creampie, and I don't want any bastard kids

7/24/2011 6:26:55 PM

Quote :

"^ I guess girls think that since they did something for the guy, the guy should help out. Chances are though, if the couple are living together (unless cooking is normally a joint effort), one of them is supporting the other more financially, and should have to do less work "

My boyfriend and I live together. He makes twice as much as I do but I contribute an equal amount towards bills, food, etc. I also take care of the cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping, etc.

Basically, it varies a lot from couple to couple and you need to figure out what works for you. For me it's easier since I get off work at 3pm and work from home half the week. I can have dinner ready by the time my boyfriend gets home at 6pm. It just makes sense.

7/24/2011 6:35:43 PM

If you're a man, you pay for everything.

Of course ladies, the quality of man you're willing to settle for also depends on how hot you are.

I need to start finding some of these discount bitches that wanna go dutch on life.

7/24/2011 6:49:52 PM

I found out my fiance (now ex finance) took some of our wedding money to book a ticket to ny to see her ex boyfriend

7/24/2011 6:51:07 PM

before or after you guys split?

7/24/2011 6:51:49 PM

^ ^ I wonder if she dabbled his semen in her mouth and then delivered it back to you on the return flight like a mama bird feeding its hatchlings

7/24/2011 6:53:24 PM

before. I found out. she had been known to dabble in it. if she would have tried to feed it back to me there would have been problems

7/24/2011 6:56:44 PM

Maybe he could have been your best man in the wedding if things hadn't gone south.

7/24/2011 6:58:02 PM

yeah what could have been. ass

7/24/2011 7:00:27 PM

She sounds like a real bitch, just FYI. Glad you got out.

7/24/2011 7:01:03 PM

Quote :

"If you're a man, you pay for everything. Of course ladies, the quality of man you're willing to settle for also depends on how hot you are."

When we go out, my boyfriend pays for everything. And he also treats me to nice gifts just because. I don't mind paying half on house stuff. I lived alone prior and I save money living with him.

7/24/2011 7:20:53 PM

^I like the way you guys run things

7/24/2011 7:22:27 PM

Quote :

"To everyone, I also hate your gf and wife because she's always begging for a creampie, and I don't want any bastard kids "

hey, guy, don't be stealin' my real life hilarity/sadness

7/24/2011 7:23:56 PM

My wife supported my ass for 2 years, now we split life expenses, but I pay for everything that is not a necessity and do so happily.

7/24/2011 7:44:53 PM

When you're married, shouldn't the money belong to both of you?

7/24/2011 7:46:06 PM

^^^^ thanks you know for us it works. It was something we talked about in detail prior to moving in - how much we made, how much we owed in bills per month, if we had any other debts, and from there determined how much we could contribute to our house but in a way that we both saved money.

I'm a neat freak and I also enjoy cooking so cooking/cleaning for me again makes sense with how it's set up. Sometimes I do wish my boyfriend helped out more and sometimes he does surprise me but 99% of the time, we're happy with what we agreed upon.

[Edited on July 24, 2011 at 7:47 PM. Reason : More carrots]

7/24/2011 7:47:04 PM

^^ We have personal checking accounts, a joint checking account, and a joint Credit Card. I don't see a reason to combine everything.

7/24/2011 8:00:13 PM

mine's perfect










correct thread.

7/24/2011 8:04:10 PM

Haha. We're almost the opposite. We have joint checking and savings, but separate credit cards.

7/24/2011 8:05:59 PM

No credit cards and no shared accounts. Sometimes that annoys me when I spend 60% of my check on bills.

[Edited on July 25, 2011 at 1:59 AM. Reason : ighdfklvnbwerjknefiohbeeraifbnieondrunksdi;'fn]

7/25/2011 1:58:43 AM

The only thing I really complain about with regards to my wife is how long it takes her to get ready. Now I realize it generally takes women longer than men to get ready, but it takes her for-ev-er. She recently started a new job where she doesn't have to be there until 9am. She sets her alarm for 5:45 . And thats with a 10-15 min commute and just grabbing a pop tart to eat on the way. I could fix a four course breakfast and go back and take a nap with that much time

It doesn't bother me as much now since she doesn't have to be at work until 9, but her previous job there were days she had to be there at 7:15 (so would set alarm for like 4) and she had a 30 minute commute. So she would wake me up 15-30 min before my alarm was scheduled to go off so I could iron her clothes for her since she didn't have time (and wouldn't do it the night before). And this was every day.

And to top this off, if she accidentally oversleeps (which we all do on occasion), she doesn't understand the mindset that its ok (every once in a while) to just throw on your clothes, make sure you don't look like crap, and then walk out the door. She will insist on doing everything (shower, wash & cond hair, shave legs, blow dry/straighten hair, makeup, etc.) and will just try to do it faster. Doesn't matter if she woke up 30 min before she was supposed to leave, she would try to cram a 3 hour routine down to 30 min. Which never happens since she still insists on doing everything like she woke up on time

7/25/2011 8:56:59 AM

Quote :

"So she would wake me up 15-30 min before my alarm was scheduled to go off so I could iron her clothes for her since she didn't have time (and wouldn't do it the night before). And this was every day."

LOL WUT?

also - what the hell does she do that it takes 3 hours to get ready? including a shower and blow drying my hair, i can be completely ready to go in 45 minutes.

7/25/2011 9:28:43 AM

Quote :

"So she would wake me up 15-30 min before my alarm was scheduled to go off so I could iron her clothes for her since she didn't have time (and wouldn't do it the night before)."

Wowwww. Do you iron your own clothes to begin with? And do you do laundry separately or together?

In terms of the waking up late bit - a fiend of mine got up 3 hours before her classes every morning to do makeup etcetera (and I have to admit, she looked great everyday), but the times she was late she would freak out, just put her hair up, but wait for a bus to campus instead of driving so she could do at least some of her makeup on the way. I don't get people like that.

I feel guilty about having to wake up way early if I'm spending the night with my guy, now especially as I've an 8am class, so to make it on time, I have to get up at 6 (to catch the bus at 6:45, I really don't care how I look for a class that early), but then again, he has to hear my alarm.

7/25/2011 9:30:35 AM

Quote :

"So she would wake me up 15-30 min before my alarm was scheduled to go off so I could iron her clothes for her since she didn't have time (and wouldn't do it the night before). And this was every day."

7/25/2011 9:33:04 AM

I think you're a little too up-tight if you have a problem with a significant other peeing in front of you. Shitting and farting...a problem...peeing, no. I've got one bathroom upstairs and one downstairs...the hell if I'm going to walk downstairs to pee just because you're brushing your hair.

As for my girlfriend, I have a problem with maybe two things...and one of those she can't control. The first...she gets horrible hangovers and regular headaches on the regular. She could control it by not drinking as much the night before...but we drink and have fun together and I don't want to stop her doing that. And she honestly can get a terrible hangover from just having 4 or 5 drinks as opposed to a crazy night of drinking. But it does suck when we can't do anything the next day because she has a migraine and/or is throwing up. Oh well...

Second thing is that she can get pretty down sometimes and I really have to work to get her out of the "funk." In general, she's an extremely happy-go-lucky, positive person. But her job gets her down a lot (teaches hearing impaired and disadvantaged children in a really shitty school system) and she'll get off of work in a very bad mood quite often. I've figured out how to turn mood around...but it would be nice if she could leave the depression at work.

7/25/2011 9:40:47 AM

I have zero complaints.

She's the best thing that ever happened to me.

7/25/2011 9:42:47 AM

She sleeps endlessly and then complains that we don't have a lot of time together or that she doesn't have time to do anything.

She buys a lot of perishable goods and then never even touches them ( we have at least 3 pints of yogurt, a half gallon of milk, sliced deli meats, etc.... that have never been touched)

When I got laid off a few years ago she cried and complained about how hard it was on her.

We split the chores and she rarely makes it to hers on a weekly basis. When she does, she completes them slowly over the course of the week and then complains the next week that "she seems like she just got done with it and doesn't feel like doing it again.


We make about equal but I pay 2/3 of the total bills while she buys starbucks coffee every day and eats out for lunch. I survive on turkey sandwiches 5 days a week.

Related to the above like most couples we aspire to move into a better home one day but she suggests she doesn't have the money save, meanwhile she does pilates 3x a week for $15 each

7/25/2011 10:14:33 AM

^ your girlfriend has it MADE! she can come switch places with me. i guarantee she'd quit her bitchin.

7/25/2011 10:15:48 AM

Quote :

"I think you're a little too up-tight if you have a problem with a significant other peeing in front of you. Shitting and farting...a problem...peeing, no. I've got one bathroom upstairs and one downstairs...the hell if I'm going to walk downstairs to pee just because you're brushing your hair. "

Even in our master bathroom, the actual WC has a DOOR! But he never shuts the door. How hard is it to shut the door?

I wouldn't mind if he'd ask me to get out of the bathroom. I'd gladly leave.

Quote :

"We make about equal but I pay 2/3 of the total bills while she buys starbucks coffee every day and eats out for lunch. I survive on turkey sandwiches 5 days a week. Related to the above like most couples we aspire to move into a better home one day but she suggests she doesn't have the money save, meanwhile she does pilates 3x a week for $15 each "

Have y'all discussed personal budgets? Agreed budgets for food/leisure/etc. throughout the week? Between eating out for lunch, Starbucks and 3x Pilates, that's anywhere from $100 to $150 bucks per week, or 5k to 7.5k per year! Cut that in half, take the extra money and put it toward a high-interest savings account!

[Edited on July 25, 2011 at 10:27 AM. Reason : d]

7/25/2011 10:25:43 AM

Quote :

"Even in our master bathroom, the actual WC has a DOOR! But he never shuts the door. How hard is it to shut the door? I wouldn't mind if he'd ask me to get out of the bathroom. I'd gladly leave."

I just don't see the big deal of peeing in front of someone.

If there was no door on the WC, would you still leave and/or be offended?

7/25/2011 10:27:11 AM

I'd be annoyed. My family members don't openly pee in front of other people. I'm not used to people peeing with the door open.

7/25/2011 10:28:28 AM

set em up

7/25/2011 10:28:57 AM