He didn't die of natural causes.

11/17/2011 8:43:58 AM

Quote :

"^^you don't really think some moral lecture or speech from the bullies' parents is really going to effect what they do at school? the kid will just bs some answer and keep doing it "

You are applying a bandage again. As I said:

90% of bullies are made due to bad/neglectful/abusive parenting.

IOW, if your child is a bully, you have failed as a parent to begin with, so any bandages applied at that stage, whether by the parents or by the teachers, will probably not work, as you said.

11/17/2011 3:39:14 PM

Quote :

"should make a good addition to your "vocabulary" then "

hey McDanger, SHUT THE FUCK UP

anyway, we all stood around and dissed eachother, sometimes you fucked up and wore the wrong size jenas to school, never went hom and killed myself. I mean you might slip up one day and get clowned the rest of the year for it

cant you all see the way we are being forced to raise our children and the way we are being forced to NOT deal with conflict is turning our society into complete soft individuals? Individuals that see quitting as an option, the media has us thinking that popularity is important above all and if we dont get people to like us we have nothing to live for. So sadly these children get picked on and no one wants to hang with them so instead of picking up a hobby or something, go fishing pick up a craft, nah...they have no reason to live because some nitwit deemed them a social outcast so they "dont wanna play anymore" so they off themselves

its quite symptomatic honestly. I cant blame teachers for not realizing what goes on because it may appear to be harmless ribbing like a majority of playground situations are. Kids have got to learn to at least speak out and defend themselves so that someone knows there is a problem, whether it is via retaliation or bringing it to a teacher's attention

o, but "dont snitch brah"

[Edited on November 17, 2011 at 3:48 PM. Reason : f]

11/17/2011 3:40:46 PM

Quote :

"Supposedly no evidence of bullying has been found so far by the school or the police: http://www.fayobserver.com/articles/2011/11/17/1137815?sac=Local I'm working really hard not to lay some serious blame on the mother here. "

well they said the kid left the school for a while; I hope they wouldn't make something like that up

11/17/2011 3:48:15 PM

couldn't she find friends online? apparently she had the internetz since she had facebook.

mad at your friends on facebook? switch to myspace.

tired of myspace? go to twitter.

i dunno...with the internet, i don't buy the whole "people tease me IRL" thing because the netz can be a place to escape and be popular away from the "bullying" at some lame school.

P.S. Let's not blame the teachers. They're there to teach and make the school board look good; they don't have shit to do with social situations. Also, I assume laziness on the part of the parent(s) on this one too...I saw the video.

11/17/2011 5:26:02 PM

Just stopping in to give a local update:

So many rumors flying around with fingers pointing at abuse in the home. Most people are not jumping on the 'bullying' bandwagon since no major instances have been uncovered.

11/17/2011 5:38:06 PM

^^I don't think telling a 10 year old "go make friends on the internet!" isn't the best idea

11/17/2011 5:46:56 PM

How Not to Raise a Bully: The Early Roots of Empathy
http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1982190,00.html

11/17/2011 5:59:21 PM

Quote :

"anyway, we all stood around and dissed eachother, sometimes you fucked up and wore the wrong size jenas to school, never went hom and killed myself. I mean you might slip up one day and get clowned the rest of the year for it cant you all see the way we are being forced to raise our children and the way we are being forced to NOT deal with conflict is turning our society into complete soft individuals? Individuals that see quitting as an option, the media has us thinking that popularity is important above all and if we dont get people to like us we have nothing to live for. So sadly these children get picked on and no one wants to hang with them so instead of picking up a hobby or something, go fishing pick up a craft, nah...they have no reason to live because some nitwit deemed them a social outcast so they "dont wanna play anymore" so they off themselves its quite symptomatic honestly. I cant blame teachers for not realizing what goes on because it may appear to be harmless ribbing like a majority of playground situations are. Kids have got to learn to at least speak out and defend themselves so that someone knows there is a problem, whether it is via retaliation or bringing it to a teacher's attention"

QFT

these are the same damn kids who all get ribbons for every contest, project, and tournament... hey, you may be a dumb ass whiny wuss who refuses to confront any issue, BUT HERE'S A TROPHY ANYWAY! thank you for your participation!!!!!!

11/17/2011 6:08:17 PM

Quote :

"i would take a serious look at the parent in this case. what 10 year old considers suicide????"

When I was about 10 or 11 I thought about it multiple times.

11/17/2011 6:23:32 PM

wow begonias youre pretty cool!

11/17/2011 9:51:39 PM

Why are there no consequences for the bullies??? It always seems they get away with it.

They should be forced to stare at this girl's dead swinging body and tell them they drove her to this and it's their fault. They deserve a little psychological punishment.

11/18/2011 7:28:18 AM

^ Agreed.

11/18/2011 8:09:38 AM

Because they are kids and kids pick on each other. It's how they determine who is popular and who is not.

Where is the line when it comes to classifying someone as a bully?

"Your clothes are ugly"...You're a bully! --> </life> --> punish the "bully"
"You smell funny"...You're a bully! --> </life> --> punish the "bully"

It's a weak excuse and life is not always sunshine and rainbows. Hate to say it, but it filters the feeble ones from the herd (Darwin). Of course there are exceptional cases where intervention should take place such as a kid getting beaten up every day by a group, but if it's just teasing, kids just need to understand that there are worse problems than what other people think of them.

11/18/2011 9:02:07 AM

^ I do agree with your last statement. When I moved to Havelock and (mostly) stopped caring about what others thought, my self esteem was way higher. I mainoynthought about suicide not only for constant teasing but for other reasons like my parents' divorce getting so nasty. But you are right - these kids need to realize it's only words. However, with help getting to that point can be very hard

11/18/2011 9:06:49 AM

^ I was in the same boat

11/18/2011 9:11:52 AM

My wife went to HS with both of the parents, so she's pretty upset about this.

11/18/2011 9:15:59 AM

This new bullying trend is just another way for parents to blame someone else for something they don't like in their own lives. Everyone gets bullied. Everyone gets made fun of. Parents just don't want to do any parenting of their own children and would rather blame someone else's child. I'm not condoning beating up, real verbal abuse, etc. but it seems that nearly anything is now called bullying and that whenever some kids tries to/does off-him/herself it was all the bully's fault; where were the parents of the bullied kid? Not being parents, that's where.

11/18/2011 9:16:04 AM

Bullying trend?

And for the record, bullying can go much farther than just beating someone up. Being constantly teased is going to wear many people down who are that age, especially when you've been hearing it for years and years.

11/18/2011 9:20:10 AM

15 years ago, we didn't have kids offing themselves and doing stupid shit for being bullied (at what seems to be a high rate now). Now, it's all the rage. I blame the parenting. Bullying isn't new.

who said bullying was only beating up someone? trying to argue a non-point here?

[Edited on November 18, 2011 at 9:23 AM. Reason : .]

11/18/2011 9:21:28 AM

TEACH YOUR KIDS TO BE STRONG AND CONFIDENT

LOOK PEOPLE IN THE EYE
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
DON'T LET YOURSELF BE THE VICTIM

11/18/2011 9:22:48 AM

15 years ago, I wanted to off myself over constant teasing (plus other crap in life).


So obviously it isn't a "trend."


Sounds like you are one of those people who have just never been through this and therefore blame the parents. Coming from someone who has thought this way, I can assure you I hid this from my parents for a very long time. I finally told my mom when I actually stood up for myself one day to seem of the worst kids. She had no idea, and I didn't expect her to.. Why? Because I didn't make it obvious to them on purpose

[Edited on November 18, 2011 at 9:24 AM. Reason : Oh I'm sorry, 14 years ago ]

11/18/2011 9:23:53 AM

I got bullied really bad in the 7th & 8th grades. mainly because I was the new kid in a small town middle school. After playing football in the 8th grade, I knew that I really wanted to play in high school, so I spent the summer working out and getting in better shape because I wanted to be a reciever/tight end. When I first started my freshman year of high school, the same guys started teasing me and all types of shit. The second week of school, they tried to stuff me in a locker but I fought back too hard and make lots of noise so they walked back into the gym. I went out to the gym, and regardless of the coaches being there, I went up to the main guy who was bullying me and knocked the shit out of him which sparked a nasty fight in which I got my nose broken.

After returning to school from my suspension, I had no further issues and in fact had an awesome time in high school. Not once in my life have I regretted that decision to fight, and in fact I think it had a huge impact on my life. That decision to stand up for myself and let them know that I wouldn't be pushed around was one of the best decisions I've ever made.

Some people take the easy way out, and some people fight back. This hasn't changed since the dawn of time and never will. You just have to decide if you're a fighter or a quitter.

11/18/2011 9:24:31 AM

Agreed, raiden

I wish these kids would speak out so they could have someone to talk to but I know not every kid has that option

11/18/2011 9:26:07 AM

i was bullied plenty in my youth. though i used my brain and sometimes my fists.

11/18/2011 9:26:07 AM

Are you saying I didn't use my brain?

11/18/2011 9:26:37 AM

well you did some, seeing as how you didn't off yourself or something a little less severe.

11/18/2011 9:30:54 AM

I should also tell ya'll my parents' reaction.

My dad came to get me from the school after the principle called him. He acted all mad and disappointed in the principle's office, but as soon as we got him, he asked me to tell him the whole story and I did. Afterwards he gave me a mountain dew from the fridge and said "that's my boy! I'm not punishing you for this, you did what every man has to do at some point in his life". I asked "what's that" he replied "make a stand for yourself".

My mom was PISSED when she got to my dad's house. Said that I shouldn't have fought, should've told someone, etc etc. Her and my dad (they're divorced) had a few arguements about it, and she was still pissed at the time. However, now, she believes it was essential in making me the person I am today.

11/18/2011 9:31:04 AM

I think it's a lot harder when you're depressed because of home issues and then you go to school and are bullied. No matter where you go, you're life sucks ass and it seems there is nothing that can be done about it. I never was much of a fighter and usually tried to avoid conflict. I was just so angry and sad all the time and felt no one really cared. I'm sure there was some home issues going on with this girl. Maybe not bad enough to call child services, but no matter where she went she felt she couldn't get away from the sadness.

11/18/2011 9:32:12 AM

I stood up for myself and had someone to talk to in the end (my mom). Other kids aren't so lucky, and while I wish they would see there can be someone to help them build up their self esteem, some will never know those things are available to them or might not have the strength to go on. It's a sad truth, and I wish it were different, but to act like this is a "trend" is ridiculous.

[Edited on November 18, 2011 at 9:34 AM. Reason : ^^ your dads reaction is great, and ^ this is very true]

11/18/2011 9:33:34 AM

I was teased and bullied all through school for being short and/or studious and/or not having the most sylish clothes, etc... (depended on the bully). There were many times that I thought suicide was the answer. In middle school it got to the point where I was taking weird combinations of pills and cutting. High school was no better, but after I got my license, I at least had more freedom and channeled my frustrations into swimming and working out at the local YMCA. I just had to keep reminding myself that as soon as HS was over, I was going to get out of my hometown and do something bigger with my life. And I did. College was the best time of my life and I was able to become the person I always knew I was without being pigeon-holed into the shy girl I was in elementary school (when I tried to come out of my shell in HS, I was told that I was being fake). I'm actually looking forward to going my HS reunion next year because I am a completely different person than I was then... confident and happy with an awesome job and wonderful husband.

My parents were completely oblivious to everything going on in my life, so I don't blame them for not doing anything to help. I just wish kids now were as lucky as I was to make it out and go on to do great things.

11/18/2011 9:40:59 AM

Quote :

"This new bullying trend is just another way for parents to blame someone else for something they don't like in their own lives. Everyone gets bullied. Everyone gets made fun of. Parents just don't want to do any parenting of their own children and would rather blame someone else's child. I'm not condoning beating up, real verbal abuse, etc. but it seems that nearly anything is now called bullying and that whenever some kids tries to/does off-him/herself it was all the bully's fault; where were the parents of the bullied kid? Not being parents, that's where."

WTF? You are putting the parents of the victim on trial, but not saying a thing about the parents of the bully? As I have said repeatedly in this thread

Quote :

"90% of bullies are made due to bad/neglectful/abusive parenting. IOW, if your child is a bully, you have failed as a parent to begin with."

Yes, it IS weird that the parent(s) didn't know that their child was being bullied to this extent, but you seriously can't lay most of the blame on the victims parents. As for the mother in this case, I said this on the first page:

BTW, this doesn't compute:

Quote :

"Jasmine was picked on at Chadbourne Elementary School, West said, noting other children teased her about her clothes or her shoes. She left the school for a while and dreaded having to return about a month ago, her mother said. "It's a shame that kids are that cruel. It really is," West said, noting that she never knew how badly Jasmine had been tormented."

If she didn't know the extent of the torment, why did she allow her 10 year old to leave school "for a while"?

11/18/2011 5:19:24 PM

Tormented != Teased

I hate that they keep saying bullies "torment" people. It's usually just people that make fun of something you have/wear/look like/lifestyle/situation/smell like/etc. That's why we need a remake of Back to the Future. That would inspire people to stand up to their bullies. Worked for me.

[Edited on November 18, 2011 at 5:40 PM. Reason : or Revenge of the Nerds]

11/18/2011 5:40:01 PM

The girl could have 'left school' for a number of reasons.

Could have moved, gotten sick, death in the family, etc.

Students come and go more often than you would think.

11/18/2011 5:59:25 PM