3

Quote :

"Why the long face?"

Horse says: "bone cancer"

5/9/2013 11:28:13 AM

What has two black eyes and gives great head




My son

5/9/2013 11:33:43 AM

5/10/2013 10:18:42 AM

What do you call a black man flying a plane?
A pilot.

Why is there no Aspirin in the rain forest?
Because it wouldn't be financially viable to try and sell pharmaceuticals in the vastly unpopulated rain forest.

Why didn't the octopus have any friends?
Because they are antisocial creatures by nature.

Why did the catholic priest get sent to jail?
Tax evasion.

A dog walks into a bar.
He is promptly escorted out as animals are not allowed.

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping out of a plane?
A world record sky diving group, and an improbably large aircraft.

5/10/2013 10:46:14 AM

What did the biologist say when he dropped his slides?
Don't step on mitosis!

-------

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff?
They were my friends.

5/10/2013 12:57:09 PM

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. Possibly two if a ladder is required.

5/10/2013 1:00:17 PM

a white guy, a spanish guy, and a black guy all walked into a bar...

they each bought rounds of drinks and shared plenty of laughs and good stores

5/10/2013 1:04:21 PM

What's red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint

Knock Knock
Who's There?
Doorbell repairman

5/10/2013 1:14:37 PM

did you hear the one about the preachers wife?

she made him lunch every single day, and was faithful to him until the day she died

[Edited on May 10, 2013 at 1:23 PM. Reason : a]

5/10/2013 1:20:57 PM

A squad of soldiers are walking through the badlands in Iraq during the first days of the war, when one gets separated. There is a loud boom, and the three run to their buddies aid, and they find him a mess on the side of the road.

Sarge yells, "What the hell happened??"

The privatete says, " I got turned around, and saw this Iraqi soldier standing there with a rifle! We were pointing our weapons at each other, but neither of us would take the shot.

"Then I yelled at him, 'Saddam is a douchbag!' and he hollered back,' Bush is a moron...' "

Sarge looked around, but didn't see anybody, and says, "Then what happened, who threw the grenade?"

"No, Sarge, no grenades, we were just there shaking hands when he must have stepped on a mine."


I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

5/11/2013 10:56:45 AM

you hear about the new sex change operation for womens?

its called an addadicktome

5/12/2013 4:19:28 PM

Quote :

"you hear about the new sex change operation for womens? its called an addadicktome"

Well, you heard about the new sex change operation for men, right?

It's called a lopitoffome

5/12/2013 4:50:24 PM

So a man with small balls walks into a bar

And you could just tell he was a little testy.

5/17/2013 10:39:30 AM

how do you organize a space party?

you planet

5/29/2013 1:43:35 PM

Would you rather eat a pound of bricks or a matter baby?

5/29/2013 1:45:21 PM

Your Momma is so ugly...

...just kidding, she's quite attractive for her age.

5/29/2013 1:48:15 PM

Quote :

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot."

What do you call a black guy in the front of a plane?
The pilot, you racist prick.

5/30/2013 10:01:23 AM

11/5/2013 11:04:31 AM

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.
The bear asks the rabbit, "do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit replies, "No, why?"
So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

11/5/2013 12:34:35 PM

your house is so small that it isnt in a middle class suburban neighborhood

11/5/2013 1:02:16 PM

http://www.buzzfeed.com/awesomer/puns-that-are-too-clever-for-their-own-good

11/6/2013 7:01:29 PM

Why did the sperm cross the road?

I put on the wrong sock

3/2/2015 3:50:07 PM