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 Message Boards » » Quitting, Moving, and Starting Over Page 1 [2] 3, Prev Next  
GREEN JAY
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moving to vancouver or florida and starting over on page 2

1/23/2014 5:46:15 PM

face
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i didnt quit my job but i had a situation where i could have taken a job in raleigh or another city and i chose the other city. The job would have been downtown and living downtown and walking to work would've been pretty cool.

i'd just broken up with a long term g/f and realized almost all my friends there were married or had moved to other cities. I just said fuck it let's move especially since the other job seemed a little more lucrative with better opportunities.

First year has been really positive. Made a ton of new friends and now i have friends in both places, though i dont see the raleigh ones as often obviously. Soon im moving into a beach house which we'll be sweet ass sweet. Couldnt have done that in the Wood.

I think the thought of just having a fresh batch of pussy you haven't either slept with or been rejected by yet is enough to make the move. It gives you a good topic of conversation when you meet girls and girls always love mystery dick. It's like being the new guy in 11th grade or something. Hell, ive been here a year but anytime i meet a hot girl i still usually tell her i'm new here and play dumb just because it's an effective strategy. Hell, i might still be new here next year.

But i wouldnt do it without a job first, personally. If i was between jobs then i'd consider it.

[Edited on January 23, 2014 at 6:03 PM. Reason : a]

1/23/2014 6:00:48 PM

Restricted
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Don't leave me

1/23/2014 9:04:31 PM

BridgetSPK
#1 Sir Purr Fan
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Quote :
"But i wouldnt do it without a job first, personally. If i was between jobs then i'd consider it."


?

1/23/2014 9:37:29 PM

Kiwi
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My husband and I did this in 2009. He got laid off and even though I was scared to death I quit and we moved to a small town into a kick ass downtown loft. We signed a lease without having a job but it really motivated us to get something quick. When we were at the end of our rope we both got decent jobs and lived there for two yrs. we are back now due to family obligations and are more secure with a house payment and such but it was a blast having an adventure meeting new people and with no family around to save us. Some may call us stupid but I cherish that time we had together creating an adventure. I'd do it again in a heartbeat, but only to the coast. we still joke about saying fuck it again and skipping town, we are such hopeless romantics. Heh

1/23/2014 9:56:57 PM

UJustWait84
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Quote :
"i didnt quit my job but i had a situation where i could have taken a job in raleigh or another city and i chose the other city. The job would have been downtown and living downtown and walking to work would've been pretty cool.

i'd just broken up with a long term g/f and realized almost all my friends there were married or had moved to other cities. I just said fuck it let's move especially since the other job seemed a little more lucrative with better opportunities.

First year has been really positive. Made a ton of new friends and now i have friends in both places, though i dont see the raleigh ones as often obviously. Soon im moving into a beach house which we'll be sweet ass sweet. Couldnt have done that in the Wood.

I think the thought of just having a fresh batch of pussy you haven't either slept with or been rejected by yet is enough to make the move. It gives you a good topic of conversation when you meet girls and girls always love mystery dick. It's like being the new guy in 11th grade or something. Hell, ive been here a year but anytime i meet a hot girl i still usually tell her i'm new here and play dumb just because it's an effective strategy. Hell, i might still be new here next year.

But i wouldnt do it without a job first, personally. If i was between jobs then i'd consider it."


Didn't you move to Wilmington or some joke of a coastal city? LOL

1/25/2014 1:00:33 AM

Noen
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I did it three times, and the fourth time I had a job offer before I packed up and left.

Its honestly only scary the first time. Really made me stop caring about all the material stuff in my life, and I loove owning tons of shit (packrat/collector/hoarder). I could move again anytime now and have no problem condensing my stuff from the current 4br house down to a couple of boxes and suitcases.

Its super fucking liberating, forces you to learn how to be social post-college and if nothing else you'll have a lot more interesting stories to tell.

It isn't expensive either. Put all your shit in a storage unit, except what you can comfortably fit in your car and just go. Stay in hostels or crash with friends. If you like a town, find a sublet for a month or two to feel it out and get a no-stress shit job just to meet people.

3 months on the road like this cost me ~1500 a month, including plenty of social excursions.

[Edited on January 25, 2014 at 2:07 AM. Reason : .]

1/25/2014 2:05:35 AM

Restricted
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I think I could do this, but I would have to have a job lined up. I'm really torn right now because I got a good shot of moving back up to DC within the year, but I'm not sure the wife is really on board 100%. I need to get out of this place more than her. Is a fresh start really going to do me any good? I don't know...sounds good at least. Sometime I think I take where I live for granted (short commute, low cost of living, etc).

1/25/2014 10:35:44 AM

AntiMnifesto
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Shrug. Thought I'd end up in Colorado, California, or Portland, OR like everyone else when I was 22. Got a job in Durham, met someone, switched careers, bought a house, will probably die here.

I knew I would never leave NC when I kept visiting all the places I was considering moving, and I just wanted to go back to NC. The cost of living, the career and educational opportunities, the growing season, the weather, the access to country for bike riding and agriculture. Nope, can't ever imagine leaving.

[Edited on January 26, 2014 at 9:03 PM. Reason : dasdasd]

1/26/2014 9:02:36 PM

ncstatetke
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Don't quit, move, and start over unless you have a killer job lined up. The grass is not always greener....

1/26/2014 10:58:47 PM

Johnny Swank
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I chucked it all before I thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail. Best decision I've ever made. Frankly, I'd been a lot better off doing that about 5-10 years prior to take a time out and get my priorities/shit in line instead of floundering for several years.

1/27/2014 8:06:04 AM

elise
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My friends quit their jobs and sold their house to hike the Appalachian. One week in the wife found out she was pregnant.

1/27/2014 8:38:09 AM

ComputerGuy
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I'm really lucky,

I can live anywhere I want and do what I do...especially now after some things have changed.

I'm contemplating trying out Costa Rica or Buenos Aires for a few months at a time.

I moved 2 hours away from everything I knew when I was 24 on a whim. I wasn't financially stable at the time, but was lucky I could relocate my job. I kicked ass and got promoted in the new area. I've got my degree, and left that old job for something bit more adventurous. Now I have two kick ass companies offering me great jobs with travel, and I can live where I want to....

Seems only logical to take in some sight seeing along the journey.

but I am looking to buy a house back home to have some "roots"

1/27/2014 9:56:33 AM

Jeepin4x4
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what kind of "nest egg" would you feel you needed to be comfortable attempting something this? enough that would keep you afloat while you found residency and/or employment?

1/27/2014 11:24:13 AM

BridgetSPK
#1 Sir Purr Fan
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If you're willing to tighten your budget and work crappy jobs for a while, then you wouldn't need much in the way of savings. But you'd wanna stay focused on something...don't let time get away from you and whatnot.

1/27/2014 11:55:05 AM

ncstatetke
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^^ at least one year's rent, one year's car payment, and $10K for gas/food/utilities/misc

1/27/2014 1:33:32 PM

jbrick83
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^ That. I'm too cautious...and I would need around $30k to feel comfortable doing something like that...$20k at the least.

1/27/2014 1:53:33 PM

shoot
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Do it!
I live in Beijing for 25 yrs then decide to start over in US. Never regret!

1/27/2014 2:02:36 PM

dyne
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I'd say closer to 6 months max, unless you have a crappy major/area of work with little work experience.

I did something similar to this (i had relatives that i was able to stay with during this time), and it only took me 2 months to find a job in the same field i previously worked in.

One thing I would have done differently is pick up a menial job in the meantime to make extra bucks while job searching and/or meet people.

1/27/2014 2:04:04 PM

UJustWait84
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Quote :
"Shrug. Thought I'd end up in Colorado, California, or Portland, OR like everyone else when I was 22. Got a job in Durham, met someone, switched careers, bought a house, will probably die here.

I knew I would never leave NC when I kept visiting all the places I was considering moving, and I just wanted to go back to NC. The cost of living, the career and educational opportunities, the growing season, the weather, the access to country for bike riding and agriculture. Nope, can't ever imagine leaving."


Well if you never really wanted to move in the first place, it's no surprise you're still in NC. I'd say the only thing NC has on places out west is the cost of living, but that's a matter of opinion. The West coast certainly isn't for everyone- especially those who have their minds made up about it before they even move.

1/27/2014 2:29:27 PM

shoot
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West coast is for Chinese and other Asians, lol.

1/27/2014 2:32:41 PM

UJustWait84
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You've never even been to California, shoot. You sound just like NC rednecks that hate the State who've never been.

1/27/2014 6:06:51 PM

Jeepin4x4
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I'm going to California during the first week of March. Wouldn't mind never coming back.

1/27/2014 6:52:43 PM

ncstatetke
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take a northern detour on your way out there. I'll show you a good time

1/27/2014 7:02:15 PM

HUR
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^^ Sauceman without reading this whole thread were you thinking about moving?

After spending the last week in Oregon, I'm seriously thinking about saying "bye Charlotte" and moving out to Portland or Eugene. I've lived in NC my whole life (Raleigh, Charlotte, Wilmington). Currently I have no car payments, am renting, got enough stashed up that I could probably not work for nearly a year (not that i'd want to deplete my entire savings), single, etc.

I have always wanted to "try out" the West Coast, just never had the balls to do it when i first got out of school. As much as I like California, there is something about the culture in Oregon that I find appealing. Plus the beer and landscape there rocks!

1/27/2014 7:21:20 PM

Jeepin4x4
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^^deal. If i did it i would take my time getting there.

^yeah man, basically my real good friend and his gf are doing it next week. packing up, heading west to CO. and it's really got me thinking about a similar change myself.


What scares me the most is that what I do now is not what i'd want to do anywhere else. I'm just not into it nor would I want to even consider it as a fall back. So I get a lot of anxiety about what kind of work I could get while trying to decide what it is I really "want to do".

1/27/2014 7:24:13 PM

HUR
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Yeah i'm not to worries about the job aspect. Especially in a major city like Portland. I'm just more concerned about rebuilding a social life or if i'd get homesick being so far from friends and family.

1/27/2014 7:30:21 PM

BridgetSPK
#1 Sir Purr Fan
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http://www.policymic.com/articles/80099/where-will-marijuana-be-legal-next-this-map-points-to-5-specific-states

1/27/2014 8:08:43 PM

UJustWait84
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Portland is great minus the weather. Sorry, I need sunshine to function.

1/27/2014 8:10:24 PM

HUR
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Weather was nice when i was out there last week haha. Maybe it was deceivingly warm and sunny.

1/27/2014 8:11:36 PM

UJustWait84
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PacNW summers are like heaven on earth. It's warm, sunny, and the sun doesn't set until like 10PM. The rest of the year is pretty shitty and gray.

1/27/2014 8:15:19 PM

adultswim
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Got laid off recently, so I'm seriously considering a move out west now. The toughest part is deciding whether or not I'll regret leaving my friends and family behind. Anyone have advice on that?

2/3/2014 12:14:11 PM

djeternal
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I did something similar when I moved back to Greensboro from Cary. I had graduated from NCSU and had been working in RTP for 4 years. It was a stable job doing genetic research for biotech company. The salary was enough to pay the bills and have a little extra left over for fun, but I came to realize that I had no room for growth. Plus I had a personal situation at the time that I knew would never resolve itself unless I got away from it. I got to the point where I knew that I would only truly reach my potential if I left that career and life behind.

So I decided to quit, move back to Greensboro, and start over with a career in sales. It was an easier decision for me since my family and a lot of my friends live here, but it was still a pretty big leap of faith. But fortunately for me it worked out, and it's the best decision I have ever made.

2/3/2014 12:24:17 PM

UJustWait84
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Quote :
"Got laid off recently, so I'm seriously considering a move out west now. The toughest part is deciding whether or not I'll regret leaving my friends and family behind. Anyone have advice on that?"


Well, like I said earlier, it's definitely easier when you're younger. I've found that the older I get, the harder it is to make new friends, and I'd say I'm reasonably extroverted and not shy. In my experience, I've been able to stay in touch with really close friends from back home, but that's because I put in a lot of effort with Facebook and I come back home a few times a year anyway. My family loves visiting me out in CA and it's great to be able to show them around as it gives me an excuse to go wine tasting, take road trips, etc. The thing about CA and the Bay Area in general is that a lot of people are transplants, so people are fairly welcoming to newcomers. I found San Diego to be the same way, but natives there tend to be a bit more stuck up than here. I say go for it. If you don't like it, you can always move back home.

2/3/2014 12:40:54 PM

adultswim
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Right, I can always move back. The good thing is most of my friends are rock climbers, so there would be extra incentive to come visit me in Denver. My parents have already said they'd like to come visit a couple times a year. Plane tickets aren't too bad to NC, either.

2/3/2014 12:47:38 PM

UJustWait84
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A lot of people might try to talk you out of it. Just remember that the people who care about you most want to see you happy. In the end, it's your life. Those who have your back will gladly come visit and/or make time when you're back in town. If anything, by moving you'll find out pretty quickly who your loyal friends are, versus those that only want you in their life when it benefits them.

2/3/2014 2:09:28 PM

The Dude
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Quote :
"Has anyone ever done anything like this without the security of a new job lined up? What was your motivation to move? Love, complacency, adventure? How did you break it to your friends and family? How did it turn out in the end?
"


Just last year I did this (except I got a job before moving). Starting looking for a new job in October 2012. Landed a new job in January 2013. I moved to a new city leaving all my friends and broke up with my fiance who I had been with for 8 years. Best decision I've ever made.

I hated my old job and my home life was always questionable. I've always though about moving on in both aspects of my life but was afraid to do so. I seriously just decided one day in October 2012 to finally take some initiative and move on with my life.

Even despite my new found confidence I was still scared to move to another city where I didn't know anyone. I chose Seattle since I was born there and had a brother and best friend who lived there. I only applied to jobs in Seattle and was lucky enough to land a perfect job who's headquarters were in Seattle. Unfortunately they sent me to their Knoxville, TN office for a year. I was very upset at the time when they said I'd be sent to somewhere where I didn't know anybody but this place has grown on me. I quickly established friends and I'm with a new girl who has been great for me. I'm eligible to move to Seattle in a few months but I think I'll be staying in Knoxville until at least the end of the year.

All in all, I say do it even if you have to take a step back in your career. Happiness is priceless and no job is worth sticking around if you're miserable. Being away from my friends and starting over was the biggest challenge for me. I learned quickly that establishing new friends was not as hard as I thought and despite the distance I will always maintain the friends I made in Raleigh.

[Edited on February 3, 2014 at 2:17 PM. Reason : yo]

2/3/2014 2:16:19 PM

HUR
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The way NC is going to a Theological Christian state, I think idea of a move is becoming easier. That and the Pretentious Sunday Christian Banker/Banker-Wife crowd in Charlotte is suffocating.

[Edited on February 4, 2014 at 10:28 AM. Reason : a]

2/4/2014 10:27:23 AM

adultswim
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Quote :
"That and the Pretentious Sunday Christian Banker/Banker-Wife crowd in Charlotte is suffocating."


haha. yes.

2/4/2014 10:50:45 AM

Jeepin4x4
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lol

2/4/2014 11:26:47 AM

PaulISdead
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whats it like to hang out with a toaster salesman?

2/4/2014 2:35:49 PM

TKE-Teg
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Quote :
"
Friends and family are in Charlotte, but all of my friends are married. I can go an entire week without seeing them. I spend a lot more time with what i'd call my "fringe friends" in town. People i ride bikes with, guys I play softball with. But my core friends have all settled down and that's fine. Like you said, i don't want to spend the next 30 years waiting for Friday and the off chance one of them wants to get a beer that night.

And truthfully i've never lived anywhere else. I did my 4 years in Raleigh and moved right back to Charlotte. I have a pretty sizable nest egg. The only thing that scares me is my resume is now loaded up with Construction experience. and I honestly want to get as far away from the construction industry as possible. And do what? i don't know and that's what really scares me the most."


Jesse, with just a few minor changes this describes me pretty well for my current state. I've already done this once (moved to NYC in '05 out of the blue with no job prospects lined up) but of course, I came back to Raleigh. I think Raleigh is a great place to live, but I'm entirely too bored with the industry I work in, and again I have no clue what else I would want to get into. Likewise I see most of my good friends here less and less. A lot have settled down and others' social interests have changed. I definitely feel like I'm again in a rut (similar to 2005) but am not really sure what to do. I'm currently a homeowner, so there isn't much flexibility for me to just pick up and move though.

2/4/2014 3:07:32 PM

1in10^9
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Done it quite a few times, but always with a job offer in hand. NC->DC->CT/NY->MA->CA.
I enjoy change of scenery, but after landing in San Francisco I never looked back. Perhaps that will change later, but for now I'm content. Weather is much better than anything on the East Coast and after visiting 40 states and living in 6 of them, I am done with the search...at least when it comes to USA. Food is much more diverse on the West Coast and you can do things year round. Tahoe is 3hr away, beach is 10min, Yosemite 2hr away. Yeah taxes are higher, but it is worth it. I totally don't miss shoveling snow, dealing with cold for 4 months out of the year and then deal with suffocating humidity in the summer.

Being a foreigner though, I would move abroad anytime to test it out. This planet is way too big to not try out other places. It is hard to know what you do or don't like unless you have few reference points to compare. Although, unless you have enough savings, I doubt it is financially smart to just pack up and leave just for the sake of adventure. Look for a job first and then move. My 2 cents.

2/4/2014 3:08:41 PM

HUR
All American
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Quote :
"but after landing in San Francisco I never looked back."


Not gay are you?

2/4/2014 3:19:12 PM

1in10^9
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nope.

2/4/2014 3:19:56 PM

UJustWait84
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Quote :
"Done it quite a few times, but always with a job offer in hand. NC->DC->CT/NY->MA->CA.
I enjoy change of scenery, but after landing in San Francisco I never looked back. Perhaps that will change later, but for now I'm content. Weather is much better than anything on the East Coast and after visiting 40 states and living in 6 of them, I am done with the search...at least when it comes to USA. Food is much more diverse on the West Coast and you can do things year round. Tahoe is 3hr away, beach is 10min, Yosemite 2hr away. Yeah taxes are higher, but it is worth it. I totally don't miss shoveling snow, dealing with cold for 4 months out of the year and then deal with suffocating humidity in the summer.

Being a foreigner though, I would move abroad anytime to test it out. This planet is way too big to not try out other places. It is hard to know what you do or don't like unless you have few reference points to compare. Although, unless you have enough savings, I doubt it is financially smart to just pack up and leave just for the sake of adventure. Look for a job first and then move. My 2 cents.

"


The Bay Area is definitely the nicest region in the US-so long as you're willing to pay for the lifestyle that comes along with it. While NYC, Chicago, and even Boston are probably more exciting and have better nightlife, you're not going to find a better offering of natural/scenic beauty, incredible food and wine, and the year round pleasant weather (it's damn near PERFECT in the East Bay and on the Peninsula) to enjoy it whenever you want. SoCal is pretty nice too, but it would take me a HUGE pay increase to leave all that I've made for myself up here. If I had to move, it would probably be to Europe where I could have a comparable lifestyle.

2/4/2014 5:00:29 PM

Jeepin4x4
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^got any job openings?

2/4/2014 5:06:09 PM

UJustWait84
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I work in higher education, so unless you've got a master's and are looking to teach, I can't really help. If your background is in tech/engineering, the Bay Area is probably the best place to work in the country right now. There are tons of jobs and a degree from NCSU is actually seen very favorably here.

[Edited on February 4, 2014 at 5:10 PM. Reason : .]

2/4/2014 5:09:38 PM

HUR
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I want to scout out the bay area but i wanted to wait to go to california until the fall so i can visit N. Cal than take a $100 S. West flight to San Diego to see a chargers game.

I think in May/June i'm going to head up to the PacNW to check out Seattle and go back to Portland.

My lease ends in July so any action wouldn't happen until then.

[Edited on February 4, 2014 at 9:55 PM. Reason : l]

2/4/2014 9:55:04 PM

ncstatetke
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Quote :
"I did something similar when I moved to Idaho from Cary. I had graduated from NCSU and had been working in RTP for 3 years. It was a stable job doing inside sales for marketing company. The salary was enough to pay the bills and have a little extra left over for fun, but I came to realize that I had no room for growth. Plus I had a personal situation at the time that I knew would never resolve itself unless I got away from it. I got to the point where I knew that I would only truly reach my potential if I left that career and life behind.

So I decided to quit, move to Idaho, and start over with a career in sales. It was a difficult decision for me since none of my family or friends live here; it was a pretty big leap of faith. But fortunately for me it worked out, and it's the best decision I have ever made."

2/5/2014 1:03:02 AM

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