ComputerGuy (IN)Sensitive 5052 Posts user info edit post |
6/25/2012 10:24:36 PM |
Slave Famous Become Wrath 34079 Posts user info edit post |
Genital Herpes is overrated. You're gonna be scratching your nuts for the rest of your life regardless. 6/25/2012 10:25:52 PM |
settledown Suspended 11583 Posts user info edit post |
a followup to the herpes confession
Quote : | "To answer Kate, I had crazy strong feelings about this person. They're amazing on every level. Gorgeous. It was crazy chemistry/attraction from the start on an intellectual and physical level.
But there's an age difference. And the herpes bomb. Ugh. " |
6/25/2012 10:28:23 PM |
saps852 New Recruit 80068 Posts user info edit post |
age difference can be overlooked, lifelong std not so much
Quote : | "The most I ever saw squirted was by an 18 y/o boy I use to suck occasionally. I was 12 y/o at the time. I'd usually do it for him in a shed behind his house. If I saw him working on his car in his yard I'd just stop by and help him if he wanted me to. If he was horny he'd take me back to the shed and get me to suck him off. I was always more than willing to do it for him. I had experiece sucking a few other boys off so it was nothing new for me but he did have the biggest penis and testicles of any boy I had done it for previously. This one time he took me into the shed and he took his pants down and sat on a high stool and I started sucking him. I could barely get more than the head of his penis in my mouth but he had shown me how to jack him while I sucked on what I could. He must not have cum in a week or so. I was use to swallowing cum but never THAT much. I certainly couldn't swallow it all when he started squirting and I started choking and gagging. His penis popped out of my mouth and he must have squirted three more big ropes of cum on my face and in my hair. All I can say was that it was a LOT! He let me masturbate until I had my dry cum and then he helped me clean myself up so I could go home with no tell tale traces of cum for my mom to see. He had always squirted a lot I thought but never that much. He even said "Wow!" after he had finished. So did I...." |
LOL
[Edited on June 25, 2012 at 10:32 PM. Reason : .]6/25/2012 10:29:42 PM |
settledown Suspended 11583 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I am 87% sure I'm pregnant. I'm going to wait a few days longer before I take a test. I'm not sure what I want the outcome to be. " |
6/25/2012 10:32:49 PM |
settledown Suspended 11583 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I picked up a guy once at a local cruising spot, came right out and asked him if I could suck his cock. He told me this was his 1st time and that he definitely wasn't gay. I pulled his soft member from his pants and began to give him head, the whole time he kept telling me that he wasn't queer. I really didn't care one way or the other but after my best efforts, I couldn't get his cock hard. I was about to give up when all of a sudden, without any warning or sign, he started cumming in my mouth like a fire hose! It was the only time I wasn't able to swallow what was shot in my mouth, maybe only a 1/4 of what he put out...probably a cup full or more. The whole time he was cumming, he kept calmly saying that he wasn't gay. I'm glad this wasn't my 1st time...there might not have been a 2nd! " |
6/25/2012 10:33:10 PM |
dropdeadkate nerdlord 11725 Posts user info edit post |
aaaaaaaahahaha a cup of cum? from a soft dick?
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE REAL CONFESSIONS. but I did lol 6/25/2012 10:36:07 PM |
settledown Suspended 11583 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "All my ejacs are pretty big, but if I don't cum for a few days I shoot myself in the face every time. The best cumshots are wnen I squirt into my mouth. Whenever I cum on my bare stomach I wipe it up with my fingers then lick them clean. " |
someone is trying really hard to test my resolve to post every confession i receive6/25/2012 10:37:50 PM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Went on 2 dates with a guy recently and noticed a couple of red flags.
Date #1: SO FUN! We went to the beach. But at his house, he showed me a huge bag of weed. Like, a gallon ziplock stuffed full.
Date #2: Great date. He brought me a dozen roses. Took me to drinks, dinner and a movie. We're kissing at my house later and he stops and says he needs to get comfortable. Takes off a HANDGUN that was clipped to the inside of his pants. He's in sales (drug sales, perhaps?) and said he just keeps the gun on him because he doesn't like to leave it in his house or his car. He DOES have a conceal carry.
WTF? Is this guy a drug dealer? " |
Me personally, no problem with the CCW... but the gallon ziplock of weed, especially on a first date 6/25/2012 10:42:32 PM |
dropdeadkate nerdlord 11725 Posts user info edit post |
i mean. if i saw a gun i'd just think "oh he's just like every other southern dude i know"
and if i saw the weed i'd just think "well, maybe he gets a good deal when he buys in bulk"
but if i saw them together...... i'd think "i need to get the fuck away from this drug dealer before I get caught up in some cray cray drama" 6/25/2012 10:46:07 PM |
ComputerGuy (IN)Sensitive 5052 Posts user info edit post |
Is that before or after you fucked his brains out by stabbing him to death and killed his dog? 6/25/2012 10:51:36 PM |
ComputerGuy (IN)Sensitive 5052 Posts user info edit post |
This is interesting, wasn't really expecting this. Apparently neither was he
Quote : | "Several years ago I was getting fucked in the ass for only the second time, and had asked a friend from work to come along too.
I was on my back getting fucked by a small cock (very comfortable!) and it must have been just the right size to hit my prostate. I was masturbating, and sucking my co-workers cock, and had the most intense orgasm of my entire life. It's just a guess, but it seemed like I let loose about two shot glasses full of cum. Man, that felt good." |
6/25/2012 10:52:46 PM |
ComputerGuy (IN)Sensitive 5052 Posts user info edit post |
This one makes me sad.
Quote : | "pretty sure i won't live to see my next birthday " |
6/25/2012 10:53:49 PM |
iheartkisses All American 3791 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "i'll probably succeed next time. " |
6/25/2012 11:10:11 PM |
iheartkisses All American 3791 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "sometimes I put my hands in my armpits and hold them there and take them out and immediately inhale my fingers " |
6/25/2012 11:17:30 PM |
jimmypop All American 1405 Posts user info edit post |
accepting 3rd shift confessions 6/26/2012 1:44:44 AM |
se7entythree YOSHIYOSHI 17377 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Date #2: Great date. He brought me a dozen roses. Took me to drinks, dinner and a movie. We're kissing at my house later and he stops and says he needs to get comfortable. Takes off a HANDGUN that was clipped to the inside of his pants. He's in sales (drug sales, perhaps?) and said he just keeps the gun on him because he doesn't like to leave it in his house or his car. He DOES have a conceal carry.
WTF? Is this guy a drug dealer?" |
this girl is an idiot. omg
and, drug dealers don't typically operate with legal firearms.
is she seriously this stupid?6/26/2012 7:49:54 AM |
sparky Garage Mod 12301 Posts user info edit post |
DAMN THESE SEX CONFESSION MAKIN ME 6/26/2012 8:22:14 AM |
iheartkisses All American 3791 Posts user info edit post |
6/26/2012 9:55:17 AM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
^^^I think it's the firearm in conjunction with the gallon baggy of weed... 6/26/2012 9:58:52 AM |
ComputerGuy (IN)Sensitive 5052 Posts user info edit post |
These gay confessions are from backpages.
[Edited on June 26, 2012 at 10:04 AM. Reason : h] 6/26/2012 10:00:54 AM |
iheartkisses All American 3791 Posts user info edit post |
^^ And probably because if the guy claims he has a conceal carry, but seems shady as fuck, then he's potentially lying. 6/26/2012 10:10:41 AM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Hah, I highly doubt the confessor actually saw the permit. "I'm gonna need to see your CCP before we continue our date, so I can make sure you're legally operating a firearm, and that can convince me you're not a drug dealer." 6/26/2012 10:12:56 AM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Ahah, I stand corrected:
Quote : | "Actually, I asked him about the CCW... and then this morning he texted me a pic of it.
I assumed he was lying. " |
6/26/2012 10:48:16 AM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I just got a job offer that comes with a 35% raise and i'm seriously thinking about turning it down" |
hmmm...you should make a pros and cons list. I also think often a gut feeling can be correct. Good luck!6/26/2012 11:58:24 AM |
sparky Garage Mod 12301 Posts user info edit post |
i just took a job with a 35% raise and had to relocate from Raleigh to Houston. Totally worth it!! 6/26/2012 2:01:38 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I am seeing a girl. On and off. She likes me. Whenever we see each other we hookup. I know she has a troubled past with her ex but I don't know how bad apparently he stalks her. Well after hooking up with her, it's 130 am and we are going to sleep. I hear a key knocking at the door. We are both like 'what!?' being 130am and all. Well it continues on and off for the next 5 minutes. Man. Either this dude is stalking her and coming over unannounced like she swore or she had a late night both call lined up with him. Either way I figured it wasn't a good idea to continue with this girl in the first place, so this is a good time to pull the parachute IMO.
The sex was phenomenal though. I will miss that. Man it was great. Definitely not a bring home to mom kinda girl, but also man it was fun. Oh well. That's always how it seems to workout " |
Sorry for your lots.6/26/2012 6:38:26 PM |
NeuseRvrRat hello Mr. NSA! 35376 Posts user info edit post |
if that confession is true, then CHP or not, it's illegal for him to own or possess any firearms or ammunition 6/26/2012 7:07:27 PM |
bmel l3md 11149 Posts user info edit post |
This thread is reminding me how luck I am to not have to go on random dates anymore. 6/26/2012 7:26:57 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I always thought you had really pretty eyes.
and man hands " |
ugh, you are such a buttface! And I am embarrassed of my tramp stamp, so thank you, jerknozzle.
6/26/2012 7:39:15 PM |
EMCE balls deep 89771 Posts user info edit post |
Aww, I like your tattoo. And your hands, which happen to be very unmanly. 6/26/2012 7:58:43 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
thanks, EMCE. Unfortunately, some people are on my dunzo list. That buttfluffer better not ask me to go play putt putt because we are so dunzo.] 6/26/2012 8:53:04 PM |
jaZon All American 27048 Posts user info edit post |
lmao 6/26/2012 9:04:53 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I would hold hands with you any day of the week." |
and they aren't manly, they are weakly feminine. 6/26/2012 10:02:46 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I think one of your hands is manly and the other is unisex" |
OH JEEZ!! This one came from an unexpected user name. 6/27/2012 1:47:40 PM |
sparky Garage Mod 12301 Posts user info edit post |
^ hahahaha 6/27/2012 1:51:58 PM |
bbehe Burn it all down. 18402 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Still Tippin' on four fours, wrapped in four vogues Tippin' on four fours, wrapped in four vogues Tippin' on four fours wrapped in four vogues Pimping four hoes and I'm packing four fours " |
6/27/2012 9:37:38 PM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
I made the mistake of promising to post all confessions.
Quote : | "Ohhh grandma (MIKE JONES! Who?) DJ Slice, tear me up baby, tear me up This heah for my grandma mayne I love you baby The whole family miss you baby I'm fin' ta tell the world, how important you was to me
Ohhh grandma, I miss you and wish I could kiss you and hug you girl Ohhh grandma, I miss you and wish I could kiss you and hug you girl The way you used to hold me - the way you used to hold me The way you used to show me - the way you used to show me Befo' you left you told me - befo' you left you told me That I was gonna have to keep the family up (Mike Jones!) " |
[Edited on June 27, 2012 at 9:38 PM. Reason : ^hmm, I wonder who yours is from...]
Quote : | "How u like yo eggs? Fried and fertilized fried and fertilized fried and fried and fertilized " |
[Edited on June 27, 2012 at 9:41 PM. Reason : ]6/27/2012 9:37:55 PM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Before I came up in the game these hoes didn't show no love They see me in the club and used to treat me like a scrub They wouldn't holla 'cause my dollars wasn't swell enough I bet they change they mind when them 80 4's come rolling up They see that I'm a star, now they wanna sit in my car Now they wanna count my G's, smoke my weed and sip my bar now They used to love to me diss me, now they rush to hug and kiss me now They telling all they friends when I leave how they miss me now 2 8 1, 3 3 0, eight zero zero 4 Hit Mike Jones up on the low 'cause Mike Jones about to blow" |
This thread is about to be ruined.6/27/2012 9:41:31 PM |
Shadowrunner All American 18332 Posts user info edit post |
Those aren't confessions. You didn't promise to post any shit someone PM's you. 6/27/2012 9:54:11 PM |
se7entythree YOSHIYOSHI 17377 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Back then hos didnt want me Now im hot hos all on me Back then hos didnt want me Now im hot hos all on me Back then hos didnt want me Now im hot hos all on me Back then hos didnt want me Now im hot hos all on me" |
6/27/2012 10:02:03 PM |
punchmonk Double Entendre 22300 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I believe love lifts us up where we belong" |
this could be a great song.
Quote : | "Plz to give me only handies from your unisex hand. " |
lame. If I were a dude, I would want the stronger grip for my dangler. 6/27/2012 10:12:56 PM |
settledown Suspended 11583 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Back then hos didn't want me Now im hot hos all on me" |
i feel like i've seen a ghost6/27/2012 10:14:32 PM |
thegoodlife3 All American 39304 Posts user info edit post |
this hangs on the wall of my living room
6/27/2012 10:28:13 PM |
DivaBaby19 Davidbaby19 45208 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "The other day I was at work and using the only bathroom. I had a soft poo and no matter how much I kept wiping, there was always some brown left on the toilet paper. Often when this happens I wet some toilet paper with soap to make sure everything is cleaned. Next to me was hand sanatizer rather than soap, so I was like, yeah should work fine. NOT! the rubbing had made everything raw and then add the burn! I could barely walk for 5 minutes and all I could think of was "MY ANUS IS BURNING!!!", but in the voice of the flurries in this video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6M17aG_Po2Y" |
6/28/2012 1:05:52 AM |
G.O.D hates 4 lokos 4694 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | ""The most I ever saw squirted was by an 18 y/o boy I use to suck occasionally. I was 12 y/o at the time" |
I think that this person was 12 and had that much experience is scarier than alot of cum. I wonder how early they started sucking cock. Also I hope that this is from a girl.
(At twelve I hadn't kissed a guy or even held hands.)6/28/2012 9:15:13 AM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Hah, at 19 I hadn't kissed a guy or held hands. But I think that's hardly normal. 6/28/2012 9:20:32 AM |
Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I started playing with girls when I was 8. I am such a dirty, dirty boy " |
Quote : | "By dirty, I mean kinky and not STD infested. Let's get that straight. I'm clean as Pine-Sol." |
6/28/2012 3:22:24 PM |
djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
open to confessions 6/28/2012 3:30:13 PM |
Dr Pepper All American 3583 Posts user info edit post |
BUMP, these recent ones are lolers 6/30/2012 9:19:48 PM |