page 308

confess to me!

3/15/2013 10:55:47 AM

Quote :

"Oh man, Minka, I have a huge moral dilemma. Yesterday I found out that a good friend of mine had an affair while his wife was out of town this week. I'm also good friends with his wife and girl he cheated with. His wife has been a coworker of mine for years now and I've known her longer than him. The dude is pretty much my homeboy -- I helped plan his bach party, went to his wedding, etc. The mistress is a 19 yr old intern that started working here in January. Said mistress is the one that told me what happened out of guilt and because I know all parties involved. As far as I know, only me, the mistress, and the dude are the only ones that know of the affair. I feel a moral obligation to make sure his wife knows about this -- she is way too sweet of a girl to live in ignorance her whole life. So my options are: 1) Tell his wife. I have proof of the confession from the mistress if needed. 2) Confront my friend and try to convince him to tell his wife. Knowing him I doubt he could be convinced. Also, if he finds out that his wife may find out, he may try to figure out a way throw me under the bus to try and cover his ass. 3) Ignore the situation and feign ignorance when/if shit hits the fan. If the wife finds out I knew and didn't tell her though, I don't wanna lose a good friend. HALP, TWW! "

3/15/2013 11:35:21 AM

oh man that is a good one.

i'm of the mind not to get involved. especially since you aren't one of the main three parties implicated.

was it a one time thing? a drunken mistake, or a full on planned affair?

3/15/2013 11:37:28 AM

Confront him and give him a chance to step up to tell her. If he doesn't then let her know.

3/15/2013 11:37:47 AM

Or option 4- fuck the intern.

Besides, howdo you know shes telling the truth?

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 11:39 AM. Reason : hh]

3/15/2013 11:38:07 AM

Leave a note on his desk that says "I know what you did last summer week"

3/15/2013 11:40:30 AM

stay out of it

you may lose both as friends if you stick your nose where it doesn't belong


the only other option would be that since the girl confided in you, make her do what's right

ie: either tell the wife or deal with the husband



keep out of it

3/15/2013 11:40:57 AM

If the mistress felt that bad about it she should inform the wife.

Ask her if she wants the cat to get out of the bag. If she says "no", then definitely, definitely, don't go tell the wife yourself.

3/15/2013 11:44:19 AM

doesn't anyone know how to mind their fucking business anymore?

you must think you're gonna white knight it up in there and tell the wife and she's just gonna leave her husband and start fucking you

STAY THE FUCK OUT OF IT

3/15/2013 11:46:10 AM

Quote :

" Confront him and give him a chance to step up to tell her. If he doesn't then let her know. shut your fucking mouth and let it play out"

3/15/2013 11:48:15 AM

Do you know if the intern is telling the truth? Sounds like exactly the type of shit a 19 year old would come up with, especially how she's only been there 2 months.

3/15/2013 11:49:05 AM

Fuck the Intern.

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/15/2013 11:49:10 AM

truth. and if you are worried about losing a friend, well if you tell the husband that you know you are going to lose him regardless. no one wants to be friends with a guy holding a trump card in their back pocket. you'll be phased out. just stay out of it.

3/15/2013 11:49:22 AM

Quote :

"Said mistress is the one that told me what happened out of guilt"

I'm calling bullshit on this btw

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/15/2013 11:51:42 AM

Quote :

"well if you tell the husband that you know you are going to lose him regardless. no one wants to be friends with a guy holding a trump card in their back pocket."

I don't think this is true.

I've got a couple friends who are serial cheaters. I don't give them high fives when they bang a hot girl behind their SOs back but I also don't read them the riot act about being a scumbag. We talk about it, talk about the ramifications, then I let him decide what he's going to do because it's his life.

It doesn't have to be friendship ender.

3/15/2013 11:51:48 AM

Quote :

" Confront him and give him a chance to step up to tell her. If he doesn't then let her know. shut your fucking mouth and let it play out"

yeah, you did fix that for me. i was thinking on it more and they could have something between them worked out that you don't know about.

3/15/2013 11:52:49 AM

no, but he made it clear that he was friends with the girl first, and closer with the girl. so if that's the way the husband sees their relationship i could see him putting distance between them


i have similar friends, they know the foundations our friendships are built upon so those kinds of things can stay between us.

3/15/2013 11:54:19 AM

Me and Krallum on the same page ITT

3/15/2013 11:54:32 AM

I think he's closer with the guy...he's just known the girl for longer and works with her.

I mean...he planned the dude's bachelor party and refers to him as his "homeboy."

3/15/2013 12:00:36 PM

Who gives a fuck this shit is a troll

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/15/2013 12:02:20 PM

ah good point.

3/15/2013 12:04:29 PM

Quote :

"Looks like some further clarification may be needed based upon comments my last confession generated. First of all, I am not 100% sure the intern is telling the truth but I have no reason to doubt her. At a friends house warming parties a few weeks ago, dude was drunk and obviously into her. He didn't leave her side all night, immediately chose her as his partner for beer pong, kept taking care of her while she was super drunk, etc. I wasn't the only one that noticed this and initially passed it off as a minor infatuation that slightly manifested when he was drunk. Additionally, she sent me a screen shot of some text messages he's been sending her confirming things... now of course she could have just changed someone's number to say his name but it's a stretch. I've already tried to convince the intern to come clean to the wife or try to convince him to come clean but she's too scared of the fallout. She very adamantly does not want the wife to find out. Fucking the intern is out of the question. I'm married. She was a little flirty with me before she knew I was married but I made it very clear that I wasn't interested. Despite H8R's thoughts, I have no intention of fucking the wife. I've been friends with the wife longer but I am better friends with the dude. My wife is good friends with his wife though and they hang out a lot. From what the intern has told me it was mostly him pursuing her but I don't know how much I believe it. He just got a new job and was "looking to celebrate". She said he invited her over to hang out/get drunk. I told her straight up "You knowingly went over to a married man's house to get drunk when his wife was out of town... what did you expect to happen?" so she knows she is just as guilty as him. She claims he keeps texting/calling her but she is trying not to talk to her. Anyway, it looks like the consensus of TWW is to just stay out of it which I will probably do. I just wish I never found out about this. Ignorance is bliss. "

3/15/2013 12:20:53 PM

yea stay out of it.

3/15/2013 12:24:57 PM

3 way that way you win and everyone loses

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 12:27 PM. Reason : sheeeet 4 way with yo wife]

3/15/2013 12:26:46 PM

she's an intern. which means at some point, hopefully, she will go away.

let the guy live with the guilt, stay out of it.

3/15/2013 12:29:20 PM

stay out of it.

jbrick83 has the right attitude.

3/15/2013 1:57:54 PM

that would be like 6 titties

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/15/2013 2:04:32 PM

Wait, people still play beer pong?

3/15/2013 5:23:31 PM

Do y'all think the husband should let things deteriorate slowly? Or be abrupt and upfront about it now? Is one less painful/less messy than the other?

3/15/2013 5:28:53 PM

doesn't matter

he doesn't respect his wife women

there are deeper issues to be dealt with which lead to cheating

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 5:49 PM. Reason : clarity]

3/15/2013 5:46:23 PM

Agreed

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 5:59 PM. Reason : ]

3/15/2013 5:59:07 PM

I think insecurity is the root of cheating.

3/15/2013 6:56:21 PM

^

3/15/2013 7:12:35 PM

Insecure about what exactly? The relationship?

I think the root of cheating is wanting more than one vagina or dick. Lol.

3/15/2013 7:18:40 PM

I would like to think Peter's friends would at least call him an asshole if he cheated on me. However, Peter would come clean if he cheated because he's a decent human being.

3/15/2013 7:41:25 PM

I must say, I agree that

Quote :

"I think the root of cheating is wanting more than one vagina or dick."

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 7:46 PM. Reason : p[l]

3/15/2013 7:45:49 PM

I agree that insecurity is one of the root causes. For example, older men cheating on their wives and claiming they wanted to see if they still "had it"

PS,

I had a rough day - confessions, please?

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 7:50 PM. Reason : .]

3/15/2013 7:49:53 PM

lacking in one's own value is what I have seen be the driving force. People don't want to admit to it. They just want to be seen as the douchebag, crazy, the man, or the ho before they admit that they are, in their own opinion, weak.

3/15/2013 8:09:42 PM

just make minka tell the wife. everyone wins.

3/15/2013 8:16:44 PM

I would think that if they were insecure in that they lack self worth that they'd feel undeserving of anyone let alone two people.

I think cheating it pretty primal. I think it's getting away with it, not thinking about anyone else (like your so for sure) and getting your dick wet.

I think insecurity may be a small portion of cheaters. To me, blaming it on insecurity is like finding something other to blame beside the fact that you just wanted to screw someone else and not take responsibility, to me.

3/15/2013 8:17:37 PM

Quote :

"I was married for over 2 years. We had problems which led to a separation. I fully intended to remain married and faithful during that time so my wife could get some help. She slept with someone within 1 week of our separation and was rooming with his sister afterr moving out of our place. I found out when his wife called me out of the blue to tell me. That's pretty much why I'm no longer married."

Man, fuck that bitch

3/15/2013 8:30:49 PM

Sounds like some one was...

3/15/2013 8:33:04 PM

at least she did it when they were separated

3/15/2013 8:34:26 PM

^^^^
Yeah, have to agree. I don't know much about the psychology of cheating, but when I imagine a cheater, or look at cheaters I have known, I see them as being selfish, inconsiderate, narcissistic people. If anything, I would expect a cheater to be particularly secure, rather than the reverse.

I can, however, imagine a person who got reinforcement on his/her on self-worth and attractiveness by fucking other people. So I guess I see where the other camp is coming from.

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 8:39 PM. Reason : [lp]

3/15/2013 8:39:10 PM

I still think it is the root. Just speaking from all the relationships I have encountered cheating. Does not take away from the fact that person willingly put his/herself in unison with some of the scum of the earth. I am glad I am not like that anymore. Maybe some self worth can come with age?

3/15/2013 8:40:33 PM

You used to be a cheatin ho pmonk?

3/15/2013 8:41:24 PM

hahaha....not necessarily like that but I know about that insecurity with the temptation. NO ONE is above it!

[Edited on March 15, 2013 at 8:50 PM. Reason : I would equate myself with the scum of the earth at points in my life.]

3/15/2013 8:44:17 PM

This "root of cheating" bull shit is hilarious.

First...there are tons of reasons people cheat...but the majority of the time is because they just want to fuck someone else. To add to that...people who don't cheat STILL want to fuck someone else (I know I do)...some people are just strong enough not to cave into those desires.

Do some people have some insecurity issues and other psychobabble bullshit that you guys are coming up with that lead them to cheat?? Sure, its probably the cause in a few instances, but you don't stop being [sexually]attracted to other people once you settle down. Certain things may happen that lead to the breakdown that ends up with you being unfaithful...but the bottom line is that you just want to fuck that other person.

3/16/2013 9:06:26 AM

So was the intern hot as fuck?

3/16/2013 9:16:42 AM

I will listen to jbbrick3 because just as long as he always comes out as the little pitbull he is, his advice is golden.

If anyone ever says that they are not sexually or physically attracted to people after they settledown are full of bullshit but if you go and read the definition of insecure, you will find what you just described as the cheater is the exact definition of insecure.

3/16/2013 10:41:11 AM