update!

Quote :

"Took one 25 mg Adderal at 9:30 am. It is 11:30 am now. Here is my "trip report" so far: Holy shit I am so Goddamn parched the whole time!!!! Mouth is so dry even though I have already had 63 fl oz of water in the 3 hours since I have been up (8:30-11:30), but I am so thirsty!!!! My job involves speaking 90% of the time, so that just compounds it (evaporation through mouth) as compared to someone who doesn't have to talk much on their job. I have a slightly elevated heart rate and I am slightly hyperventilating, and I feel so much on edge, like I took a 200 mg caffeine pill. Unexpectedly high body load. I was so focused on the job earlier with 4 clients in a small room and I was bouncing off the walls and very animated trying to help them all, it felt great! About to guzzle another 24 oz within the next 2-3 min. My "supplier" keeps texting me again and again asking me to drink water! More updates coming later! Thanks Klatypus for your awesome advice and experience report! Wraith, thanks for your comment. I don't know how taking half would compare with taking whole vis-a-vis the various effects, but I don't mind staying up tonight.... I will just get work done! Plus, I want to experience the full effects, so I would rather take the whole one! P.S. Just felt sweating in my pits even though I am in a very cold room and I am shivering and have goosebumps P.P.S. Just saw a bright flasher in my peripheral vision... did I take acid???"

2/22/2017 6:33:56 PM

Quote :

"My long term significant other and I broke up about a month ago. . We just haven't let many people know yet. We are still good friends, and still live together. But moving day is coming up soon... How do I date? Ugh....now I have to use condoms again "

2/24/2017 6:44:03 PM

Quote :

"i'm writing this here because i have no other outlet. my wife and i found out 3 months ago that we were pregnant and found out yesterday that the heartbeat is no longer there and the baby hasn't grown at all since our last check up. i'm broken, she's broken, and we don't know what to do. it's a painful thing. i'd already imagined the child, both as a boy and as a girl, and all the things we'd do together. i even started to imagine the life lessons i'd help it tackle and how all the things i'd do to let it know we cared. we tracked every element of the baby's growth as weeks went on, so we could know that it's little fingers, or ears, or eyes were there. we may have been only 3 months in but this was absolutely our child. i no longer know how to act or what to do. it's not really a burden i can share with anyone else because we hadn't told people that we were pregnant. it's the worst pain either of us have ever felt and we're stuck keeping it on the inside and are supposed to carry on as if nothing ever happened. it's even more difficult because we're at a stage where many people we know just had a baby or are having them, so seeing them is like watching this life we were about to have play out in front of us but we can't participate. That's not the only imagery we have to worry about. The marvels of data driven advertising have us pegged. We've been receiving unsolicited formula samples to the house and are seeing commercials about pregnancy tests over and over on our Hulu accounts. the best way to describe what i'm going through is that there is an eerie silence to the world right now; as if before music was playing in my world and now someone has turned it off. this has been so horrible that I'd never wish it on anyone. i'm pissed that there is no time to mourn. as soon as you find out about the miscarriage the doctor is asking you to evaluate how you want to expel your baby. do you want to take a series of pills or do you want to have surgery that can range from $1200 to $7000, depending on your insurance. while the pills are much cheaper, they require 2 - 3 days of bleeding and tissue loss, but there is no time off for that and it's 2 - 3 days of constant reminder that your life has changed, but not for the better. given that we have to wait 3 months once the removal is complete, it looks like we'll probably conceive again right when we were supposed to deliver. i've replayed everything we've done over and over and over again. they measured where the baby stopped growing, and it's amazing how many little things you can find to blame in a small window if you look hard enough. someone rear ended us, so it must be that person's fault or we asked for decaf coffee but the person probably gave us caffeine, so it must be that person's fault, and on and on and on. I want someone to blame so the next time i won't have to worry. these 3 months were filled with so much joy and the next time they'll be filled with so much anxiety. something that was so happy has just become so dark. as with anything, life doesn't always work out but there are some little things that you believe you deserve and for my wife, not even for me so much, but for my wife she deserved this to work out. if i didn't vent, i'd go mad and explode at the world, so thank you."

so sorry

3/14/2017 12:17:28 PM

^ i had a friend that went through similar thing, and their doctor neglected to tell them that 20+% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. If you asked anyone you know that has a kid or has tried, there's a decent chance they've been through the same thing.

3/14/2017 12:24:50 PM

That sucks, sorry to hear.

3/14/2017 12:25:52 PM

Ugh, that's horrible. Our hearts go out to you.

3/14/2017 12:56:09 PM

Damn that sucks. I have a little brother that I never met. Went full term but doctor didn't act quickly when placenta separated before birth in 1981.

3/14/2017 1:01:37 PM

Have a friend that lost her girl at 8 months. Already had her baby shower, decorated the nursery, and given her a name. What made it even worse was that the father was from a hook-up partner that she didn't even like and they fought and hated each other the entire pregnancy (they never dated, he was already dating someone else when she found out she was pregnant, AND she originally told him she was going to have an abortion).

So her pregnancy was miserable and the father situation had such a bleak outlook. But you could tell she was just so excited about having this baby girl and she had come to her "happy place" about her situation. Then to have it all end...I don't think she's recovered yet (I mean...she'll probably never fully recover, but just become a normal member of the world again). Happened back in December.

As for the confession above...you can't dwell on that stuff about "what did we do wrong?". My wife has a friend that has one kid and has been trying to have a second kid for almost two years and has had more than a few miscarriages (really early ones, like first couple of weeks...and a couple of later ones as well). She hasn't had an alcoholic drink or drop of caffeine the entire time. Basically lives her life in a bubble. They've done pretty much every medical procedure you can think of and the doctor's are still chalking it up to bad look. They're trying one more route (apparently this is suppose to pretty much be a guarantee) before giving it a "break" for a little while. Then I have food and beverage friends that went on constant benders and drink a pot of coffee a day before finding out they were pregnant three months in (and have healthy babies). And others who are the exact opposite who either can't get pregnant or have "issues" in their pregnancy or with their child. I feel like it's 99% genetics and luck. There is nothing that you or your wife did that caused your miscarriage unless she was smoking crack and/or shooting heroine behind your back. You can't hold that guilt in or will really start to effect your life and your marriage.

3/14/2017 1:17:48 PM

Sorry for your loss. I'd at least tell parents/siblings if you're close. Two people shouldn't have to face this kind of loss alone.

3/14/2017 1:18:39 PM

Had a former classmate this happened to recently while at the end of the first trimester. They had not let anybody know about it, but they had even got professional photos taken. They decided to share the photos and just tell everybody about it. Not because they wanted pity, but because for he and his wife they found it gave them comfort to talk about it and hear from others who have gone through it. I know several folks who have but felt too embarassed/sad/ashamed or whatever to talk about it. It really sucks for them and for anybody that this happens to, but maybe opening up and talking about it would be your best option. At the very least people would understand what you are going through right now.

3/14/2017 1:45:49 PM

Quote :

"i had a friend that went through similar thing, and their doctor neglected to tell them that 20+% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. If you asked anyone you know that has a kid or has tried, there's a decent chance they've been through the same thing."

My sister is a genetic counselor and wishes more people knew this.

That said, you can equip yourself with all the statistics in the world, and knowing them doesn't matter because this is your very personal, very painful experience.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I agree that both of you need to talk with someone to deal with the loss and let it be a part of you, but not in control of you.

Best wishes.

3/14/2017 2:11:27 PM

1 in 4 women have suffered a miscarriage. If you are able to share please do. You never know who you may help. We are currently dealing with secondary infertility and it sucks, talking helps, but it still hurts.

3/14/2017 2:19:09 PM

I am on the fence about telling right away vs. waiting 3 months.

A friend of mine went through a miscarriage a couple years ago. She was waiting to tell people that she was pregnant until 3 months along but then had the miscarriage just before she planned to tell. She and her husband felt all alone after the miscarriage because no one knew why they were grieving/sad/etc and it hurt even more to keep explaining.

She now has two kids and pretty much told everyone right away about those pregnancies. That way had anything happened, she wouldn't feel alone in the grief.

That being said, I'm so sorry for your situation. No matter how common it is, nothing makes it any easier.

3/14/2017 2:36:42 PM

Quote :

"I don't really hate bbehe. We're secretly in love and are going to run away together"

3/14/2017 5:08:31 PM

Quote :

"My relationship is in a really weird place right now. She and I have been together 3 years now, and she's been living with me for two. Since she moved in we'd been physical less and less often, though at first I could attribute that to some health issues between the both of us. At this point though it's been months since we had sex, and a couple weeks ago I kind of cornered her on the issue. She says she's still in love with me, but that she's no longer attracted to me sexually. Honestly, I've been pretty devasted since we had that talk, and I'm not sure what to do about our relationship. To further complicate issues she's currently going back to school full-time and we had decided that I would foot the cost of living until she was able to get through it (another couple years). So now not only am I unsure if she really even loves me (she's essentially getting to live for free), but I wouldn't even know how to end things with her since she'd essentially be homeless and incomeless without me."

Shit man, this sucks. How much do you question that she loves you? Is everything normal/good in the relationship other than the sex? Would you and her be open to an open relationship? There seems like there could be a lot of factors here...

4/4/2017 1:37:01 PM

I know it sounds harsh but there are three options you have here.
1) You have a serious talk with her and let her know that your relationship needs are not being met. Physical intimacy is clearly important to you and in order to maintain a healthy relationship, it needs to happen. Otherwise you will just grow to resent her more and more.
2) End things with her. If you do have the talk with her and things don't work out, you need to seriously consider this. If she doesn't find you sexually attractive now, she isn't going to in the future and you don't want to end up marrying this person. You need to look out for number 1. Yeah it sucks for her but you shouldn't be a free ride if she isn't putting the time and effort into it too. She can get a student loan like everyone else.
3) Cheat. Obviously the least desirable and easy way out of this and I wouldn't recommend it at all, but it is an option.

4/4/2017 2:15:20 PM

Quote :

"So now not only am I unsure if she really even loves me (she's essentially getting to live for free), but I wouldn't even know how to end things with her since she'd essentially be homeless and incomeless without me.""

this is the worst possible scenario but if it's indeed the case you can't stay in the relationship. I know, because i was in a very similar scenario. Your happiness needs to come first and you can't feel guilty if you have to break things off with her and ask her to move out. You don't owe her anything.

4/4/2017 2:42:43 PM

Yeah, they should obviously split up. If necessary, end the relationship now and give her a set amount of time to find a job and a new spot. But she really should just move in with friends or family now. If she doesn't have friends or family, then she's really not doing right with her life, and you need to get her out of yours even quicker. I'm a screw-up, and even I can think of at least ten homes where people would take me in no questions asked.

Quote :

"Would you and her be open to an open relationship? There seems like there could be a lot of factors here..."

Live for free and sleep with other men?!?!

So, like, she doesn't work and instead just spends her days shagging all her lovers?

Cause that sounds awesome.

Quote :

"1) You have a serious talk with her and let her know that your relationship needs are not being met. Physical intimacy is clearly important to you and in order to maintain a healthy relationship, it needs to happen. Otherwise you will just grow to resent her more and more."

Not sure what kinda intimacy he'd want...but having sex with someone you're not attracted to can be physically uncomfortable, if not painful, even with personal lubricant.

4/4/2017 3:51:37 PM

People say stuff they don't really mean under pressure, especially if they haven't acknowledged the issue to themselves prior to the discussion. It isn't clear from the confession how much time has passed since the argument, but you should give her a chance to come back to the subject on her terms, as it sounds like you may have been focused on your perspective and needs during the talk. Did the subject of her needs come up? Stress from school, medication, sleep deprivation or depression could affect your gf's libido. She may not have even noticed the bigger picture until you pushed her on one particular point. Plan a nice evening and just ask her what is going on lately without discussion your own needs and expectations from the relationship, and just listen to her and be supportive rather than critical. If you don't care at this point to have a conversation with her focused just on what she needs to feel relaxed and sexy, leaving yourself completely out of it, then you should absolutely just move on, because that kind of love is too fragile to survive a lifetime with someone.

People who think you are ready to marry somebody need to ask themselves 'do I still love this person without sex?' Because there will almost certainly be periods where your partner is unavailable to you for physical or mental health reasons or just having too much shit going on right now. It is just inevitable, even in successful, happy, sex-filled relationships. It is equally difficult to admit to ourselves that we are letting the other down as to admit to ourselves that we are not omnipotently attractive to our partner. You get past it by focusing on what the other needs to thrive, not what you are missing out on. Love is service, not being serviced.

4/4/2017 3:55:48 PM

Serious question, have you become a fat disgusting slob?

4/4/2017 4:29:20 PM

Quote :

"Following up: I don't seriously question that she loves me, other than sex the relationship is strong. We do things together, I take her out on dates, all the normal healthyish kind of things. I don't know that I'd function well in an open relationship, though it's not something I've discussed with her either. It has been about a month since we had the first talk, and I've kind of been waiting for her to bring it back up since I tried to leave the ball in her court. I stated pretty frankly that I didn't want to be in a relationship without physical intimacy, and that I understood if she needed time to think about and process things. I don't know if she's still working through it, is just too busy with school to think too much on it, or is just avoiding the topic. I am afraid that this will end in a breakup. I do love her as much as I always have, but I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with someone I know isn't even attracted to me No, I'm around the same physically as I was when we got together, actually probably a little better as I've changed eating habits and started exercising. "

4/5/2017 8:17:44 AM

^I've been married 15 years now and gone through similar periods such as this person is talking about, but ours were later on in the relationship and not stated the same. With two kids, my wife going back to school now, medical issues, and the stress of life in general, it can be hard to fit time in for shit like this at the end of the day. I'm at a bit of a disadvantage from the get go as my wife is not a very touchy person anyways, which I normally don't mind as it means she isn't all up in my shit and gives me space. She has mentioned that sex isn't as important to her as it is to me, which is fine as people have different libidos and ways of showing their love for another. And we have both gotten fatter since we were married many years ago, but she has said she doesn't care about that for my attractiveness, but is concerned about it from a health perspective.

I agree with what somebody else said though. Have a nice dinner date, ask her how she is doing, and try to talk about it in a non-confrontational way. One of my biggest issues is that if I'm not helping out around the house with chores and supporting her, she is too exhausted to then want to deal with it when we go to bed and feels like that is the only thing I want from her. Make sure you are helping out around the house and not expecting her to take care of all the other shit because you are the sole breadwinner, which is one of the mistakes I have made in the past.

Also you mentioned you have gotten more fit, but what about her? She could be feeling insecure if you are getting more attractive and she is staying the same or going in the opposite direction. It honestly could cause her to think she is not up to your level anymore. Either way you should have an open discussion with her about this and figure it out. I had to have some chats with my wife about this stuff and she made me see where she was coming from. She never said "I'm not sexually attracted to you" it was more just that she had to much other stuff on her mind to deal with sex as well, especially if I wasn't being supportive of her except when I wanted to get some.

Relationships are fucking difficult and if she doesn't want to be with you physically anymore then be honest about it and how you are unfulfilled and can't continue in a relationship like that. But don't make ultimatums or anything either as nobody responds well to shit like that. Good luck.

4/5/2017 9:16:05 AM

Is she not attracted to you physically or just sexually? Pretty much every single long term relationship I was in, I got tired of banging the girl I was with. I was still attracted to them, I just lost the desire to have sex with them. We'd still bang when we got drunk or I was just really horny...but the frequency always dropped drastically by the end of the relationship. Same issue came up with my wife, but I loved her so much outside of our sexual relationship, that we ended up working through it and we're in a somewhat healthier sexual standpoint (once you have a kid...it will never be the same regardless).

The key is that you have to be on the same page or at least come to a level where you're both comfortable/satisfied/happy with.

4/5/2017 10:12:17 AM

I think most guys have been in a similar position when it comes to sex thats just kinda the way it is unfortunately. It is way easier for us to look past day to day stresses and be ready to go whenever.

The fact she said she wasn't sexually attracted to you anymore though would be a huge red flag. That seems significantly different than just always saying she isn't in the mood or is tired which is what most guys have to deal with at times. That sounds like a much harder issue to work around especially if its not a matter of just getting in the shape you were when you started dating or something.

Its highly unlikely she is going to bring any of this back up as its never a fun conversation. So at some point, like others said, you need to sit down and start the conversation back up in the least confrontational way you can. Tell her your concerns and just ask her if there is anything you can do better to make her more interested. All you can do is try any suggestions she makes and see if that helps. Only you can determine at what point you feel that you are wasting your time and if the physical intimacy is important enough that the lack of it is worth breaking off your relationship.

4/5/2017 10:12:43 AM

If you didn't figure it out yet, issuing an ultimatum that someone have sex with you is very unlikely to result in sex. And that is regardless of whether someone is just using you for convenience or not. And btw, living with a roommate who expects sex, sandwiches and whatever else is not convenient, even for gas food and lodging. So I am going to assume neither of you are psychopaths in a relationship under false pretenses and address you as such.

If you leave this relationship, you need to reflect deeply on whether you are ready to accept periods of little physical intimacy before you move in with someone again, otherwise at least inform them of your terms upfront. The problem isn't with this woman, it is within you. Your narcissistic need for release and validation through sex is going to rear its head anywhere if you don't deal with it. You can't just pin it on biological needs, because we have to endlessly control myriad natural impulses in every other aspect of life.

Sex just isn't why we form relationships. If you value sex over true intimacy (which you have because you were comfortable with offloading this on her), being single or in very casual associations is obviously the best way to achieve it. You move in with someone to be closer to them. And we are naturally inclined to expect that intimacy is highest when we are 'being intimate'. But sex is about building walls of intrigue and projections of the people we'd like to be, and nutting aside, the thrill comes from letting someone peek over the edge. Intimacy is rather about letting these barriers dissolve and being able to relax into your truest self with someone and have them accept your warts, even the ones you won't look at yourself-- and hopefully feeling a sense of reward from letting someone else get that feeling from you, and appreciating the trust they put in you in order to do so.

Yes, you are less sexy when you fart during the movie you are watching in ratty PJs or have the flu, indulge in vanity or other negative behaviors, or whatever it is that you do with your girlfriend around that you wouldn't do with someone you are trying to impress. But complaining about the result of not having to impress someone anymore is definitely not appreciating what you have.

Get more self-sufficient with your sexual needs and put the energy you have for resenting your girlfriend for not being a sex doll into making her feel more relaxed and appreciated. Sexual frustration makes us pursue people too aggressively, which is a turn-off. Develop some part of your personality in a positive direction and see if that doesn't build some interest to see what else has changed. And again, any future conversation on the subject of banging need to be focused on what you can do for her, not the other way around.

4/5/2017 2:36:08 PM

Or just tell her to hit the bricks if things aren't working. Problem solved.

4/5/2017 2:56:26 PM

Not that there's anyone here, but I'm open for business.

7/27/2017 10:35:56 PM

Quote :

" Why hasn't anyone brought up the extreme likelihood that the woman in the previous confession is probably having an affair? Probably with someone in one of her classes. She found someone else that she's physically attracted to, and is likely getting hers already, hence her lack of desire. So she's probably shutting down that part of her relationship. Has she been staying late at school for long nights? Is there a name that she threw around often who she suddenly stopped talking about? She just made a big life change in going back to school to upgrade her professional life, and is probably thinking about upgrading her romantic life as well. I mean, she doesn't owe anyone sex. That should go without saying. But I highly doubt that she's completely abstaining altogether. Not for that length of time. She's halfway out the door already, and is probably having talks about "ending it" with you with somebody else, but can't do a clean split because she doesn't want to start taking down her framed portraits just yet. Sorry man. That sucks, but you should probably end it."

7/28/2017 12:15:08 AM

"why hasn't anyone brought up this completely unfounded accusation that I'm only willing to bring up under cover of anonymity"

7/28/2017 8:35:17 AM

^^ Would make sense tho.

7/28/2017 9:16:07 AM

From Original Confessor:

Quote :

"We ended things pretty amicably back at the beginning of May. We decided to remain friends, and have actually been closer over the past couple months than we had been over the last few of the relationship. I will admit that we're still living together, though she's secured herself a job over the summer months which it turns out she can keep through the upcoming school semesters; so she's contributing to the financials now. Naturally we sleep in separate bedrooms, but still hang out to watch shows we share an interest in and stuff like that. We've also both ventured back out into the dating scenes a bit and it hasn't caused any strife between any of us (though it's an admittedly awkward conversation with the new people we see). The only hard rule we have with romantic entanglements in the house is that we've agreed to 'keep it down' Neither one of us wants to hear the other defiling their current romantic entanglement. So it's an oddly mixed bag, but we're actually happy and making it work. It's not a forever situation, but we're comfortable co-existing for now. During the breakup we addressed the affection issue, and she said she just wasn't interested in me that way anymore but never was unfaithful. I believe her, and that's good enough for me."

7/31/2017 9:17:10 AM

Quote :

"I started thinking about a girl I knew from high school and decided to look her up on Facebook yesterday. She was the sort of girl who was pretty quiet and didn't put herself together then, but who I could imagine getting hotter over time, so I logged on and prepared to do some creeping with the sole purpose of judging if she had become hot or not and would I consider her fuckable. Once I logged on I saw that her profile had nothing of her but tons of images saying that the brutality against our law enforcement must stop and things of that nature. I went from judging her as someone who may be hot or not and then moved on to judging her as someone who was batshit insane and probably a Trump supporter. But then I dug a little more. As I glanced through her page, I noticed that she had posted a photo of a cop who died and then saw tons of comments regarding how people were sorry for her loss. I could immediately understand why she was so passionate about law enforcement and began to feel empathy for her. But I couldn't let it stop there, so I dug a little more. I read her husband's obituary and realized they hadn't been married long- maybe two years- and had no kids. I then found a video of the officers memorial service, during which I could see her and feel all her heartbreak and pain. I've never seen someone look so hurt in my entire life as I did her. It left a lasting impression. With that impression, I've been thinking all day about the turnaround in perspective I've had for this girl. Went from a shallow, dehumanizing would I do her or not to she must be fucking nuts and then all the way to feeling her pain and wanting to call her just to say hey. It got to me so much that all night I kept telling my wife how lucky I am just to have her. All that said, she left me with a lasting impression of how lucky I am and a reminder to humanize people a little more."

Bestus, G

9/6/2017 11:47:07 AM

Then he went right back to figuring out how to work his e-game so he could get up in dem guts.

9/6/2017 11:52:32 AM

the ol' immediately-comment-on-your-confession-so-they-never-suspect play

9/6/2017 12:00:57 PM

9/6/2017 12:08:02 PM

I'm bored, someone confess to me.

9/20/2017 9:04:35 PM

Quote :

"i had my life threatened by an ex-gf twice this week "

now that sucks, I suppose the right thing to do is tell the authorities

9/21/2017 1:24:29 AM

never ever call the cops

9/21/2017 8:10:00 AM

Quote :

"I am definitely the worst mod. I'm forever reading users' inboxes"

9/28/2017 8:15:50 PM

9/28/2017 8:19:26 PM

Oh shit!

9/29/2017 11:00:35 AM

great now they all know we can do that

9/29/2017 1:20:54 PM

we? when did you become a MOD fuck face

9/29/2017 3:27:38 PM

He's the mod we deserve.

9/29/2017 5:26:53 PM

Quote :

"I just got a promotion and for the first time I'm crossing the $200k mark. Not trying to brag, but I'm actually having a hard time about it. I've never lived extravagantly, but after my last student loan is paid off in October, I'm probably gonna get a Tesla. First time I've ever "flaunted" my success and I feel like a douchebag, but I've wanted a Tesla for years and now I can do it. Feels weird man."

If it helps, you can just give me the Tesla instead

8/3/2018 11:24:18 AM

good for that person. enjoy the success.

8/3/2018 11:42:52 AM

Wow, BubbleBobble really turned his life around. gg man, and congrats.

8/3/2018 12:58:20 PM

That's not a fuggin confession

8/3/2018 3:00:52 PM

I think this thread turned into a "semi-anonymously get something off your chest" thing a while ago, yeah?

Either way, I'll allow it

8/3/2018 9:13:47 PM

qntmfred,

I appreciate that, and I appreciate you. Thanks homie.

8/3/2018 9:43:06 PM