GGMon and 0EP for some reason remind me of the parents who flip the F out over vaccines causing autism

6/8/2011 10:00:38 PM

I remember when this thread was made yesterday and I thought (as I had just posted about being a sahm soon) "huh...interesting timing..." but I didn't respond bc my opinion is screw em and do whatever you feel is best for you and your family when you're in that position.

Now I'm reading this and saw the OP post this

Quote :

"this thread came to mind after seeing a female poster, who i seemed to remember going to law school, posting about their plan to be a stay at home mom. how stupid is that? spend money on law school to stay at home with a kid?"

Is this me? I dunno...but I am not a lawyer. I am a paralegal. I've been one for 9 years, and now I'm hanging up that hat to be a sahm for approx 1 year b4 returning to the work force part time. When child numero 2 comes along, hopefully I'll be able to do the same then as well. I'll return full time once the kids are in elementary school. I spent money to get my certification and spend money yearly to keep it. I'll still do that once the baby is here as well. I do not think it's a waste. I've gotten my use out of my job, and have done well. We just want my role to now be a sahm. And my husband is more for it than I am. And I consider this lucky...not stupid.

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 10:03 PM. Reason : ]

6/8/2011 10:02:23 PM

Quote :

"GGMon and 0EP for some reason remind me of the parents who flip the F out over vaccines causing autism"

Great and logical point. Because I feel a mother should put her child (a child she choose to create) in front of a career - I must think vaccines cause autism.

6/8/2011 10:11:23 PM

I think that people also forget that eventually children grow, spend 13 years in school for hours a day, and then (hopefully) move out. What are women supposed to do then?

Also, I am friends with one women who got her PHD, had children, stayed at home until they started school, & now has a part time job using her PHD that brings home 70k a year.

6/8/2011 10:30:56 PM

Quote :

"I think that people also forget that eventually children grow, spend 13 years in school for hours a day, and then (hopefully) move out. What are women supposed to do then?"

They should go back to work - before school, the kid comes first.

6/8/2011 10:35:18 PM

^ What about the jobs where that isn't feasible? Or what about cases where the mom has to stay certified, etc?

6/9/2011 2:55:07 PM

What if...
What if...
What if...
What if...
What if...


fucking shut up already! there's always an exception to the rule.

6/9/2011 3:01:27 PM

That's not an "exception," it's very common. A lot of professions with higher degrees now require you to keep up with CEUs, certifications, etc.

6/9/2011 3:16:55 PM

common or not, it's why the average youth in this nation is retarded.

school system is failing.

backup parenting system is failing.


For example:
I HAD TO TEACH MY EMPLOYEE HOW TO WRITE HER NAME IN CURSIVE YESTERDAY. SHE COULDN'T EVEN READ CURSIVE ON A BEER BOTTLE AND SHE'S 17. SHE'S ONE OF THE BEST EMPLOYEES, TOO. SHE'S NOT STUPID, SHE'S BRILLIANT. I TAUGHT HER CURSIVE IN 15 MINUTES. SHE'S "APPARENTLY" STUPID BECAUSE THE SCHOOLS AND HER PARENTS FAILED HER.

[Edited on June 9, 2011 at 3:31 PM. Reason : .]

6/9/2011 3:30:47 PM

This is one of those topics I think a lot about when deciding my future. If I go to grad school and invest money in it, I feel like I'm going to be stuck working even if I have kids because I will have debt from it. Unless my husband makes good money. But for some reason I don't see myself marrying somebody who makes much money. Maybe because my family doesn't have money and so I'm not really around it and it's hard to picture myself doing so.

I'm seriously think that I'm the type of person that could make 60 grand a year and feel very satisfied. I'm pretty frugal.

6/9/2011 3:33:34 PM

Quote :

"For example: I HAD TO TEACH MY EMPLOYEE HOW TO WRITE HER NAME IN CURSIVE YESTERDAY. SHE COULDN'T EVEN READ CURSIVE ON A BEER BOTTLE AND SHE'S 17. SHE'S ONE OF THE BEST EMPLOYEES, TOO. SHE'S NOT STUPID, SHE'S BRILLIANT. I TAUGHT HER CURSIVE IN 15 MINUTES. SHE'S "APPARENTLY" STUPID BECAUSE THE SCHOOLS AND HER PARENTS FAILED HER."

they removed cursive from the curriculum awhile ago, no one needs cursive

do you know shorthand? my mom knows shorthand (I kinda know it), do you? OMG YOU ARE SO STUPID BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT SQUIGGLE WAS A WORD. no one teaches it anymore, we have computers for that shit.

6/9/2011 3:37:02 PM

So you sign your name in print on the signature line?

6/9/2011 3:38:21 PM

Actually, a majority of paper work asks you to print your name under your cursive signature. Technically, you really only have to put an X where they ask for your signature. Not to mention your printed name is just as distinctive (for ID/validation purposes) as your cursive signature.

6/9/2011 3:41:07 PM

who the fuck actually writes more than 2 letters in their signature

mine is a b and an h with some tall and short squiggles

6/9/2011 3:42:20 PM

Do you sign your name in the cursive you were taught in elementary school? Probably not. Signatures aren't meant to be read.

6/9/2011 3:42:44 PM

What do you sign that requires cursive? Why do you think you need to know cursive to know how to sign your name?

god you are retarded

6/9/2011 3:42:53 PM

Hmm, I guess you guys are right. It doesn't have to be taught.

Just like spelling and grammar.

and addition and subtraction without a calculator.


Let's build our house on a foundation of wood.

6/9/2011 3:47:34 PM

can she use an abacus? I would be upset if she made it through school without learning how to use an abacus.

6/9/2011 3:58:39 PM

Yes, because math and spelling are on the same level as cursive


Got it.



Way to miss my point, btw.

6/9/2011 3:59:29 PM

Quote :

"Just like spelling and grammar. "

Oh boy. I wish I cared enough about this conversation to jump on this one. You'd be amazed at what the accepted and researched educational philosophy is on the foundational importance of grammar and its teaching. It's not what a lot of people would think. All of your recent secondary English education grads can have a field day with this one.

6/9/2011 4:02:18 PM

Quote :

"What about the jobs where that isn't feasible? Or what about cases where the mom has to stay certified, etc?"

Then you don't have a child. How do you not get that. You can't have it all, you have to put one . You put the child first or the job first. My thought, if your not gonna put the kid first - don't get knocked up

6/9/2011 4:09:08 PM

so I shouldwill not have children because I'm getting a job that I have to actively keep up with, because it's constantly changing and growing

lollercoaster

THANKS FOR THE ENLIGHTENMENT

[Edited on June 9, 2011 at 4:13 PM. Reason : I made it seem definite seeing as you think your word is so valuable it's written with absolutes]

6/9/2011 4:13:04 PM

YaY!!! everyone be against foundational education!! Weeeeeeeee it's so cool

6/9/2011 4:15:30 PM

are you against the abacus?

6/9/2011 4:16:17 PM

yay!! what works for one person obviously works for every single other person on the planet.

so glad i know that now.

6/9/2011 4:16:21 PM

^ inorite



Even lionesses are working mothers

6/9/2011 4:17:40 PM

Quote :

"are you against the abacus?"

You don't know how to use an abacus? It takes less than 15 minutes to learn. You waste more time than that watching Jersey Shore.

6/9/2011 4:21:37 PM

you know, it's amazing that i turned out to be a functioning adult.

i mean both my parents worked when i was a kid and without that quality time to spend with my mom it must be dumb luck my sisters and are aren't jobless and on the streets.

6/9/2011 4:21:42 PM

or loose sluts

6/9/2011 4:22:35 PM

should schools teach the abacus, or stick to relevant things?

6/9/2011 5:05:49 PM

I still wanna know if the OP was inspired to make this thread bc of me

6/9/2011 5:35:36 PM

can't remember who it was. i think they had posted that they went to law school but didn't finish or didn't pass the bar or something and now want to be a mom. basically they flushed money down the toilet.

6/9/2011 5:43:36 PM

Oh well that's def not me.
I'd rather be a paralegal than a lawyer...leave the work at work. Heh.

6/9/2011 5:50:05 PM

^^Well, opting out of a career because of failure or fear of failure is very common. And the baby excuse is annoying.

Like, if you have trouble making friends or passing your classes, just get pregnant, drop out of college, and move back to your hometown! You didn't fail at college--you succeeded at motherhood! You go girl!

6/9/2011 5:51:44 PM

So shmwise, You would put your career ahead of your childs happiness and development?

6/9/2011 7:31:05 PM

false dilemma.

6/9/2011 7:34:47 PM

^^ oh for fucks sake, give it a rest.

6/9/2011 7:36:59 PM

outstanding retort.

6/9/2011 7:57:13 PM

i really wonder if society had an expectation of the father to nurture the child and stay home... if you would be saying the same thing.

ie, if a man were asked to give up his career to stay at home with a child, would he be willing?

i'd hazard to guess that'd be a no.


there are PLENTY of women who are able to juggle being a working mother and being a good mother. both of my sisters, my mom, my aunt and a number of my friends are able to do it.

i'm really not sure what made some of the people in this thread complete and total experts on the subject of raising a child... oh wait, it's the internet EVERYBODY is apparently an expert.....

6/9/2011 8:06:37 PM

Quote :

"there are PLENTY of women who are able to juggle being a working mother and being a good mother. both of my sisters, my mom, my aunt and a number of my friends are able to do it. "

If you truly believe a child (before the age of 5) is better off only seeing the mother for a couple of hours a night and weekends - best of luck to ya.

The juggle thing can "work" - but its not the optional. Again - if your gonna put your career ahead (or equal to a kid) don't have a kid.

This book helped my wife and I make decisions. I doubt you are open minded enough, but if you want to see the other side:

http://www.amazon.com/Being-There-Benefits-Stay-At-Home-Parent/dp/0812094905

Also - I stay home with my daughter 2 days a week, while my wife works.

[Edited on June 9, 2011 at 8:20 PM. Reason : more]

6/9/2011 8:19:45 PM

i don't dispute the benefits of being a stay at home mom or dad. never did.

i didn't say it wasn't difficult. but saying that a woman who wants to have a career shouldn't have kids is incredibly closed minded (much like you're trying to say that i'm being right now)

but circular conversation is circular... i'm done

6/9/2011 8:21:58 PM

Quote :

"i didn't say it wasn't difficult. but saying that a woman who wants to have a career shouldn't have kids is incredibly closed minded (much like you're trying to say that i'm being right now) "

Its not closed minded, the research shows not spending time the first few years negativity effects the child. You can't simply ignore the research because it doesn't fit with your view.

6/9/2011 8:27:33 PM

Biased book is biased.


I think that the bigger issue facing parents today is can they *afford* to be a single income family. I don't think that couples who need two full time paychecks shouldn't reproduce. It does not somehow make them subpar parents.

6/9/2011 8:34:27 PM

well when you have one staying at home, you're not spending $25k a year on daycare


but this thread is about women who get advanced degrees to be a mom, why waste the money?

6/9/2011 8:36:38 PM

Not everyone with advanced degrees ends up in debt and not every family with two working parents spends a dime on daycare.

[Edited on June 9, 2011 at 8:38 PM. Reason : .]

6/9/2011 8:37:50 PM

generalizations ITT

6/9/2011 8:39:42 PM

even if you don't end up in debt, its money you could spend somewhere else

and now someone is going to point out that they didn't pay for their grad school (which isn't true with law school that this thread was inspired by). but even if you are receiving a stipend you aren't making money, so its still lost income that you could have to put towards whatever.

so

pwn

6/9/2011 8:51:19 PM

again, if you have the money and want to spend it on a degree to advance your education, you have the right to do that. some women do this and it doesn't impair their ability to provide for their family in the future.

so

stfu

6/9/2011 9:00:13 PM

^

also, maybe the woman you are referring to didn't plan on wanting to be a SAHM, but when she found out she was pregnant, she decided it would be the best way to go. There's nothing wrong for her to initially want to further her education. Sure, you can look back on it as money wasted, etc, but she'll have the degree and the experience (although short-lived) for if she ever wants to go back into it one day.

6/9/2011 9:00:55 PM

i already mentioned that i understand that women enjoy spending money on useless shit

6/9/2011 9:01:58 PM