7

5/31/2011 8:00:24 PM

I have a relative who used Yahoo! singles also; she found a cool dude and they have a kid now and are very happy. They were also worried about the stigma, so they say they met at a gas station

Also, I couldn't make it through that run-on paragraph and am assuming nothing awesome happened in there. That's terrible.

5/31/2011 8:00:55 PM

i tried making a profile on match.com and have not had a single view in multiple weeks. I sent one email to a girl who had a lot of similar interests (including motorcycle racing) and a caribbean background like me. one would think that would at least get a view, but nothing. makes me think there's some step I haven't completed but it says my profile is 100%. i only paid for one month but at this point I'm not sure i'll pay for more.

5/31/2011 8:04:44 PM

valentine's day is over.. they'll be back once it gets colder

5/31/2011 8:05:40 PM

I haven't found anything long-term obviously yet, but I've had some pretty good experiences. I've gone out with four or five girls and they all looked like their pictures, were not awkward and, with the exception of one, not crazy.

5/31/2011 8:06:25 PM

Get any action yet?

Or are you one of those folks who'd "rather not say"?

5/31/2011 8:10:09 PM

^ PM me for details

5/31/2011 8:15:58 PM

i had one girl who kept checking up on me after i wouldn't e-mail her every day. I definately had to cut her off.

otherwise, i had several winks and likes, but most of the time, their profiles were very bland and boring. "i'm someone who likes trying new things and is very laid back person" ... NO SHIT, SO IS EVERYONE ELSE. TELL ME SOMETHING INTERESTING. either that or they were just plain ugly (yes, they have to be at least halfway decent looking for me to want to contact them).

I only send emails to girls who put specific interests in their profiles. That's the easiest way for me to break the ice, by asking about one of the things in their profiles. More often than not they don't respond, but i'm not concerned as it's just another medium for meeting people and i still talk to girls at bars.

5/31/2011 8:30:42 PM

There are lots of bots on Match.com

5/31/2011 8:31:25 PM

I met my bf on there. Great site.

5/31/2011 8:35:01 PM

Initially joined in January knowing that I would be working in Raleigh in March so I wanted to rebuild a social network and/or possibly find someone to get to know/date. Was messaged by a girl who lives in High Point. Long story short, we've been together now since March 20th but went on multiple dates before that (Valentine's Day being the first). So yeah, Match.com can and does work!

5/31/2011 8:36:54 PM

I'm stiff miffed you can't sort by whether a girl has that space between her thighs or not. That's really my only differentiator at this point.

5/31/2011 8:37:04 PM

stupid site. they lie to you and say your inbox is full so youll buy a subscription. then you get pissed and make an okcupid account and talk shit to girls who dont exist instead of paying money to have access every sorostitute in chapel hill who got used up and and now wants to settle down and theyre cunts.

5/31/2011 8:38:34 PM

^ don't be bitter just cuz you don't got no e-game

5/31/2011 9:32:51 PM

dang

u mad? lol

5/31/2011 9:38:23 PM

I'm actually meeting up with a chick from there today for coffee

6/1/2011 9:19:23 AM

Quote :

"I'm stiff miffed you can't sort by whether a girl has that space between her thighs or not. That's really my only differentiator at this point."

HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAH definitely spit out my oatmeal reading this.

6/1/2011 9:19:55 AM

Quote :

"I only send emails to girls who put specific interests in their profiles. That's the easiest way for me to break the ice, by asking about one of the things in their profiles. More often than not they don't respond, but i'm not concerned as it's just another medium for meeting people and i still talk to girls at bars."

Yes this is true. A lot of the girls (and I'm sure guys) put little thought in their profile and they all start sounding the same. "My name is Kelly and I like to go out and have fun, but I also can stay in and watch movies. I really love my puppy"

For the guys, the thing you have to realize is that usually it requires work to get anywhere on a dating site. You have to sign in a few times a week and send out messages knowing that your response rate will probably be less than 10%. Some of the chicks are bots, probably 1 in 20 or something from what I've seen. It's usually obvious who they are.

You may or may not get anywhere in a month. The first couple weeks you'll probably get blown off for while. Then you may start talking to a chick or two but you can't move too fast or too slow. You have to slowly exchange a few emails over about a week or two and then I ask them to meet in a public place for something like coffee. You don't want to waste too much time talking on the internet but you do want them to have a minimum level of comfort with you so they don't think you're a creeper.

6/1/2011 9:29:50 AM

bump

Ladies, what is your opinion of guys who list their incomes on their dating profiles?


I feel like if the guy makes less than 25k/year, he's better off just leaving it blank


at the same time, if he makes >$150k/year, i think he also shouldn't say anything cause it might draw backlash from girls who'd think he was pretentious/materialistic for doing so.


then again, and this might be a stretch for the imagination, but maybe lots of money is attractive to women? who knew!

8/26/2011 9:14:16 AM

Its a space to fill in so I don't see why you wouldn't include the range.

On a side note, I love girls who are only interested in 25-50k guys... Enjoy your life in Clayton!

8/26/2011 9:21:31 AM

I don't think I would care

Who gives a what if the woman is the breadwinner

8/26/2011 9:23:24 AM

ya but what if you saw a guy list his income as $250k+? Would you be more likely to respond to an email from him versus if he hadn't listed anything? (assuming he's not just making it up lol)

I imagine most girls would say no, but there's prob a few that might behave differently.

8/26/2011 10:00:55 AM

Most profiles list income. For one of my gfs, income was the first thing she looked at, which was a bit

My thought is that it helps to be compatible in terms of lifestyle. I dated a couple of guys from match who had no money because they were in grad school. Nice guys, but from a lifestyle perspective, they lived in dangerous parts of town (where I didn't feel safe visiting due to the crime) because rent was cheap, and they criticized my personal purchases (like going to Subway for a $5 footlong on my lunchbreak was me being very outlandish with money).

Another guy point-blank asked me on our 2nd date how much money I made. When I told him the range, he said I made more than twice he did and got upset with me. After that, he kept bringing up money from time to time. Like, "Oh, must be nice to make the big bucks," when talking about a previous vacation.



So, it helps to be on the same socioeconomic level. That's all.

8/26/2011 10:03:18 AM

^^^ I would care. I wouldn't want to date a dead beat and I would want the guy to be the bread winner b/c I'd want to stay at home and raise our children. not send them to daycare.

That is just my personal preference.

[Edited on August 26, 2011 at 10:13 AM. Reason : >]

8/26/2011 10:03:24 AM

from the other side, i'm pretty optimistic when i see incomes listed for girls


if its on the low end (assuming they aren't in grad school/college or whatever) i'm usually thinking 'sweet, i can take care of her'


and if she makes bank, im like 'sweet, she can take care of me!'

8/26/2011 10:09:26 AM

250k is fine as long as you have a ton in common with the guy. If he's good-looking and affluent, he has his pick of the litter. Only go for him if you really, really click.

8/26/2011 10:12:24 AM

that's a good point lucy, social compatibility is important. I personally don't consider income to be a big deal especially when ur in your 20's, but I also think for girls, they should have some standards like the dude should have a car, job, and be able to take her out to dinner every now and then. If he can't meet those minimums, time to move on.


i'm running a mini-experiment. I usually keep my income listed as blank, but i've thrown it up there just now. I'm curious to see if i get any more attention from it.

8/26/2011 10:13:35 AM

Wait. So a couple that is embarrassed by telling people they met online is telling people they met at a gas station?? Are these people from Johnston county?

8/26/2011 10:14:08 AM

Wow I can't believe I made this in 2009....that being said for the record I still never joined this site or something similar and never went on those bunches of dates.

preciously for the reason of telling people hey i met so and so at a gas station instead of online

8/26/2011 10:32:38 AM

that's precious

8/26/2011 10:33:11 AM

8/26/2011 10:33:47 AM

I met my bf on match in January. I highly recommend it!

And I just went to a match couple's wedding.

8/26/2011 10:35:47 AM

I love how so many chicks put "no preference" for the desired income of the guy. Riiiiiight.

8/26/2011 10:36:57 AM

Hey GoldenGirl. Let's go fill up our gas tanks together.


I'll even buy you a soda and a bag of corn chips.

[Edited on August 26, 2011 at 10:37 AM. Reason : .]

8/26/2011 10:37:04 AM

ya currently no desire to or in the near future, maybe one day but hopefully never

8/26/2011 10:37:13 AM

internet dating...

it's like a co-ed e-fraternity for grown ups

8/26/2011 10:38:57 AM

it's a fine line for me - i think i'm more concerned with how the guy is WITH his money than what he makes. because he could make $100K a year and be living paycheck to paycheck because of ridiculous spending habits.

i'm extremely budget conscience because when i first got out of college i didn't make shit for money. i believe it's really helped/benefited me now that i make a lot more money because i still keep a lot of my original mentality (like i dont have credit card debt because i never wanted to be in a position where i had to have an extra payment on something....my philosophy is that if i feel comfortable using my debit card then i can spend, otherwise no). when my HVAC blew on my condo last year, i was able to buckle down and create a budget and get it paid off within 6 months.

i did date a guy a few years ago who didn't like the fact that i made more than him.....mostly because he was unemployed

8/26/2011 10:42:37 AM

No I only say yes to guys at the gas station that offer to take me out for some fried chicken.

True story but ended up in me politely declining.

8/26/2011 10:42:57 AM

Quote :

"I would want the guy to be the bread winner"

I hate this mentality. Probably the main reason why I don't list mine.

[Edited on August 26, 2011 at 10:45 AM. Reason : ]

8/26/2011 10:45:11 AM

I'll admit I'm assuming that when I change my income range from 25-50k to 50k-75k I'm gonna get more responses. Depending what kinda raise I get this year that switch may be soon. I could lie since I'm very close but thought it better to stay with the lower range so chicks aren't looking at me like I make more than I do. I they care about that or what car I'm driving then they aren't for me anyways.

[Edited on August 26, 2011 at 10:52 AM. Reason : 50]

8/26/2011 10:47:05 AM

Damn. I thought for sure the corn chips would make you swoon.

8/26/2011 10:47:28 AM

when i was on match i didn't like when guys listed their income

no matter if it is "nothing to brag about" or "making bank" i think it's always in bad taste

for example, you don't meet a guy through a friend and ask how much he makes before going on a date with him. some shit is just better left to a) finding out if there is a connection and b) if the relationship gets that far.

i think you can figure out pretty quick what range of income someone has based on their hobbies, vacations (or lack of), spending habits, etc. people also tend to talk about their bills or how they pay off credit cards so you can piece together how someone handles money in the beginning before you know exactly how much they make

8/26/2011 10:54:54 AM

Quote :

"ya but what if you saw a guy list his income as $250k+? Would you be more likely to respond to an email from him versus if he hadn't listed anything? (assuming he's not just making it up lol) I imagine most girls would say no, but there's prob a few that might behave differently."

Honestly, that isn't the #1 thing I care about - I can see where Lucy is coming from as far as lifestyle, and maybe some insecurities coming out... but it was never that important to me. The only time it would be really important is if they tried controlling how I spent my money or something similar to the examples Lucy said (that's a little too crazy for me). As long as they're doing something they love and are ambitious, that's all that matters. For example, if he worked for a nonprofit I'm certainly not going to fault him for his salary - but I will if he seems lazy, doesn't care about where he's going in life, etc.


And just to take on a different perspective, I see nothing wrong with the woman being the breadwinner and the man being a stay at home dad (if he wants to). I also see no problem with both people keeping their careers and raising a family (which is what will be my case in the future).

8/26/2011 10:55:41 AM

I guess I've just gone with the mentality of being honest with as much as I can up front. Whether it's right or not most women one way or another care about salary so may as well list it. If they look and skip over me because of that then good I wasn't right for them anyways. I'm in my 30s now and looking to meet someone to settle down with so anything that weeds out a girl who is just gonna peace put later when she finds something like that out actually saves me time and money.

8/26/2011 11:06:08 AM

I think the deciding thing for me (beyond what they say on their profile about themselves) is how they look in their pictures. If the are posing in macho-type poses or if his face isn't cute I don't accept their communication (I'm on eHarmony) I also gave eHarmony a threshold for income to match me on.

8/26/2011 11:21:04 AM

I've been messing around on a dating site just to get more dates and meet some new people.

One thing I never understand are some of the photos these girls use and post. Like how can one think taking your camera phone, holding it out in front of you trying to guess if your head is in frame while the crappy little flash only lights up half your face is going to result in a good first impression? There was one that I got where the girl did that like 6 times and posted each picture with a different facial expression.

I mean I always look crappy in photos, but at least the ones I'm using were taken by someone else with an actual camera and some decent lighting.

8/26/2011 11:47:17 AM

Maybe she has no friends?

8/26/2011 11:48:34 AM

I could understand if it was just one time, but it is common that those are the types of photos posted. I'm assuming what people do is they sign up realize they don't have a photo on hand at the moment and just click away with their camera phone fast.

But my point is, your initial impression isn't the section that you read and go, "hey she likes what I like.." it is the picture, so by not putting effort into the photo part of this makes no sense.

8/26/2011 11:52:09 AM

Yeah, I would agree with Minka. You can tell a lot about a guy from his pics.

Must have the proper number of pics. At least 4, but no more than 12.
No bathroom camera pics.
No MySpace style pics.
Minus 15 points if there's a date stamp in the pic from 2008 or earlier.
Pics must show signs of personal interests (travel, hobbies) and not binge-drinking.
No pics where you blur out a former sig other's face.
No pics where you're groping a member of the opposite sex.

8/26/2011 12:03:48 PM

lucy sent me all that kinda pics and left me

8/26/2011 12:05:42 PM