eureka!

Quote :

"what the hell are two people nearing 30 who've lived on their own for 5+ years supposed to register for? "

so far

1.) maragarita machine
2.) ....

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 3:01 PM. Reason : e]

9/7/2011 2:58:38 PM

Quote :

"what the hell are two people nearing 30 who've lived on their own for 5+ years supposed to register for?"

We registered for some things that we don't currently have but would be cool to have. Like I wanted the ice cream attachment for my Kitchenaid and he wanted a PS3 lol. We also did a honeymoon registry and the vast majority of our gifts came from that which was awesome. Actually now that I think about it, I'd say 90% of our gifts were honeymoon registry or cash.

9/7/2011 3:02:48 PM

Honeymoon gifts
Nice linens ... Regardless of how nice your current linens are, backups rock

Just make sure to have a large enough registry so that people don't start giving you random crap. Some people feel compelled to give a gift, no matter what, and will not give cash or a gift card.

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 3:06 PM. Reason : .]

9/7/2011 3:05:46 PM

i didnt even know about a honeymoon registry.

ive already booked international flights and lodgings. and it'd be awesome to get some of that back

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 3:27 PM. Reason : e]

9/7/2011 3:27:13 PM

I personally am not a fan of honeymoon registries...

9/7/2011 3:32:41 PM

I registered for alot of random stuff at different price ranges (our extended families are known to be cheap so we knew they would need to have options or we wouldn't get a gift at all), whether we needed it or not. I ended up returning much of it, which thrilled my husband because with the Target gift cards, we were able to get a PS3 with some still left on the cards for other random stuff we ended up needing.

Another thing we found really helpful was Lowes/Home Depot gift cards. We were able to get garden tools, mulch, flowers, random tools we discovered we needed, a new rug, etc.

9/7/2011 3:38:28 PM

^^
I looked into honeymoon registries and I don't like how they take a certain percentage of cash gifts for "processing fees". I would never give a couple money through those if I knew it wouldn't give them the full amount.

and ^
does target give you 20% off everything on your registry after your wedding? i know bb&b does, but couldn't remember with target.

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 3:40 PM. Reason : .]

9/7/2011 3:39:00 PM

Well I mean, you can't really expect them to do it completely for free. It costs them money to process the credit cards and they need to make a profit too. And for some reason a lot of people would rather give you money through a honeymoon registry than just give you a check. People are weird

We used Traveler's Joy and they had the most reasonable rates out of all the ones we looked at. They're also very upfront about their fees, unlike a lot of the honeymoon registries out there.

http://www.travelersjoy.com/

9/7/2011 3:46:48 PM

I think it is 10% completion discount with Target.

9/7/2011 3:47:59 PM

I guess bb&b's discount is 10% too. I'll just have to save up all those 20% coupons.

and ^^ i definitely know what you mean. i would much rather have my money go towards a certain something than to just give cash. i like knowing exactly what it's going towards.

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 3:59 PM. Reason : .]

9/7/2011 3:59:32 PM

i mean it does seem a little.... tacky?

and idk why.

9/7/2011 4:12:47 PM

Apparently America is one of the few cultures that frowns upon cash wedding gifts, which I think is totally lame I'm unable to go to the wedding of a very close friend so I think I'm just going to give her $300 and a small personal gift. I know she needs money much more than material goods right now and it would be appreciated more than a stand mixer.

9/7/2011 5:21:44 PM

i think cash gifts are fine.

where it gets tacky and crappy is when the bride and groom make it very clear that they want no material goods but want all cash gifts.

oh and pshoes, my sister and her now dbag husband registered for like a new camera, some furniture, linens. larger stuff but stuff that people could go in on that was actually useful. \]

9/7/2011 5:25:00 PM

we'll be having the wedding in nc, and live in texas.

we're thinking of requesting everyone that wishes to purchase things, do so online and just ship them to the house.

would this work?

i mean, we'll be shipping everything they get anyways. or our families will be.

btw, planning a wedding from 1300 miles away is not advised.

9/7/2011 5:51:34 PM

I have no issues with giving a cash gift but for some reason I find honeymoon registries tacky.. then again, the invite I saw with one basically said, "hey guys we already have all the shit we want for our house so pay for our really expensive honeymoon instead lolkthx "


and it was stated in a rude way... literally on the invite, "The couple has what they need for their new house so please give cash instead of gifts" then their honeymoon site

9/7/2011 5:55:41 PM

Yeah that's just tacky people. Not really the fault of the registry. One of my friends was initially going to register for an outrageous Thai vacation and I warned her people would be turned off by that considering she can't even afford her bills. Now they're thinking of doing something more within their means.

9/7/2011 6:01:06 PM

Yeah, see that's what bothers me the most - seems like most people who go for a honeymoon registry pick ridiculously expensive shit, or pick out a bunch of different expensive items


One couple I saw (random person from the knot) had a dinner they registered for that was a couple hundred dollars


say what

9/7/2011 6:02:09 PM

I don't think everyone is like that though, or even most people. Like we registered for a weekend trip to Chicago. We got about $500 in gifts from that which covered all the big stuff. We just had to worry about our meals and what not. It was great!

9/7/2011 6:10:24 PM

One thing that I saw that was super cute was the option to buy experiences for the couple on their vacation. Like treat them to a couples massage or swimming with dolphins or whatever.

They weren't wicked expensive but it was something the couple could do together that wasnt necessarily paying for the couple to do something above and beyond that was fun.

9/7/2011 6:31:22 PM

carry on

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 6:38 PM. Reason : wrong topic and section]

9/7/2011 6:38:08 PM

Quote :

"One of my friends was initially going to register for an outrageous Thai vacation "

hi.

nice to meet you.

i booked our tickets for farting around/diving/doing nothing in the Phi Phi islands for 11 days, then a day or two in phuket a few weeks ago. i had my heart set on the maldives, but it just was too expensive.

it's not outrageous to me, and it's my only treat after paying for most of this wedding myself. (the entire trip will be about 15% of the cost of the rest of the wedding)

this goddamned wedding is delaying my boat and jet ski plans

9/7/2011 6:38:10 PM

Did you read the rest of what I said? Of course a vacation to Thailand isn't extravagant for everyone, but it's certainly extravagant for someone that makes less than $30k and is often behind on her bills.

You might want to check out some of the other islands around Phi Phi. I spent about a week in Phi Phi, which was awesome, but I got the itch to move on earlier than we did.

[Edited on September 7, 2011 at 7:06 PM. Reason : a]

9/7/2011 7:05:29 PM

mad people itt

9/7/2011 7:14:15 PM

Quote :

"we're thinking of requesting everyone that wishes to purchase things, do so online and just ship them to the house. would this work?"

i would only say this to anyone who mentions getting you a gift or close family. otherwise, your home address will be linked on your registry so if they have it shipped it will ship to your house anyway. i think it would be rude to state that just in general though. hopefully people will know you don't live in nc and will think about that before bringing a gift to the wedding. if not, i would suck it up and ship it back yourself.

9/8/2011 8:55:23 AM

Yeah I'm not really sure of a good way to ask for that. But pretty much everyone who bought something off our registry just had it shipped to the house. I guess since most people do that sort of shopping online these days why would they bother to ship it to their house?

9/8/2011 9:19:29 AM

that's the same train of thought i had.

i don't want to say it explicitly.

9/8/2011 9:32:36 AM

Quote :

"we're thinking of requesting everyone that wishes to purchase things, do so online and just ship them to the house. would this work? "

nope. like ncsujen07 said-it's really only appropriate to mention this to family or people that have brought up the gift thing. We were in a similar situation, and only three people shipped gifts to us. We got some rather large items (like a stand mixer, very large frames) that we had to figure out how to get home. I am not complaining- it was generous on the part of the people giving us these things. But definitely plan for shipping some stuff home to yourself, just to be prepared.



ps: we had several people pick things up off our registry in store, so no shipping was involved. not to mention, several did not get the cashier the scan the paper or whatever, so we received duplicates. stuff happens- just plan for what you can think of ahead of time, and it will make the "aftermath" of the wedding much easier on you two.

[Edited on September 8, 2011 at 1:29 PM. Reason : ps]

9/8/2011 1:26:23 PM

It worked for my neighbors. They got married in Hawaii and while they were gone all the wedding gifts showed up on their porch. Make sure you have a good neighbor that will take stuff in for you if you think you might get stuff while you are away. I have no idea how they went about asking people though.

9/8/2011 3:17:07 PM

Well, I mean, if all of their guests are flying to Hawaii too, I doubt they're going to pack a Kitchenaid in their luggage

9/8/2011 3:19:07 PM

The bride and groom are both from hawaii, so I'm guess there were still friends and family that lived there.

9/8/2011 3:21:38 PM

You could also put a hold on your mail during the wedding time and then just pick it all up when you return. I plan to do this for our honeymoon week.

9/8/2011 3:33:32 PM

wasn't sure where to post this, and it may have been mentioned before, but i thought i'd mention using http://www.mypublisher.com/ for photo albums

they came very highly recommended and the one i've seen in person was impressive...my wife has been using their software to design our book and aside from the stupidness that is not allowing the arrow keys to move a picture a pixel at a time, it's pretty nice

through today they're doing "unlimited" pages (max of 100) for $35 for the classic hardcover (8.75" x 11.25") and $70 for the deluxe hardcover (11.5" x 15")...apparently this deal (70% off) happens 2 or 3 times a year

they also put their gift certificates on sale for 50% off a couple of times per year and they can be used for anything, so makes it even better

we're ordering 3 of the classic books (2 for grandparents, 1 for my parents) to see how they look...we're also getting the lay flat pages (+$20) and super gloss printing (+$10)...if they turn out well, we're going to get a deluxe for a wedding and a deluxe for our honeymoon

just thought i'd throw out the info in case anyone was interested

9/8/2011 3:33:47 PM

^that's actually something I might need. Thanks for sharing it!!

9/8/2011 8:17:20 PM

getting married in vegas.....just wouldnt be right any other way

prob @Venetian and the packages pretty much take care of everything but the reception.

9/9/2011 1:53:04 AM

^ Isn't the reception the bulk of the planning?

9/9/2011 8:43:46 AM

So I got a picture from my mom today

Her and my cousin made wooden signs for my sisters wedding. Im a little because I had emailed my mom with lots of pictures showing her how Eric and I were going to do that.

I know it's silly and I don't plan on flipping out or anything, but I can't help but admit it makes me a little depressed.

9/11/2011 12:45:43 PM

^ What kind of pictures exactly?


Also, I cannot WAIT to post photos from our wedding once it takes place. I loooove my dress and I swear (I know I said this in Chit Chat) it looks like it was designed for me!!! Sooo excited!!!!

[Edited on September 11, 2011 at 2:49 PM. Reason : one more thought]

9/11/2011 2:47:24 PM

Inspiration pictures with details on how I was going to make them... Which is basically how the signs she made fir my sister turned out

I know it sounds stupid and silly... I would just be nice if people remembered there are two weddings being planned. Of course I understand her's is in October so we are putting our best efforts into it, but damn.. At least respect ideas I have for our wedding and don't automatically take them

/silly rant

9/11/2011 2:52:18 PM

I don't think that is silly at all. Personally I would be very upset and say something about it. In a very mature way, of course. But that just seems very inconsiderate. I mean, do you have to wait until her wedding is over to have any original ideas that are just for you and your wedding?



I'm sorry Sam, I hope it all turns out alright. Although, I'm fairly certain it will.

9/11/2011 3:50:08 PM

Yeesh yeah I'd just stop sharing ideas with your family until her wedding is over.

9/11/2011 3:52:13 PM

I agree with you completely that they should not have taken your idea and used it for her wedding... but let me play devil's advocate for a minute as well. Perhaps you should cease talking about your wedding plans at all until her wedding is over? It's not that much further away, but sister/Mom may think by coming up with new ideas constantly you're either 1) meaning to share it with your sister, or 2) trying to encroach on the thrill of last minute wedding plans for your sister and stealing her thunder by coming up with new and better ideas.

I am sure your intentions are not either, but the easiest solution may be to only focus on helping her until her wedding is done, and keep yours in the background. You've got several months where you will be the only bride in the family, she doesn't have that.

9/11/2011 3:56:35 PM

I guess what's upsetting to me about trying to cease talking about it is I really do have to plan a LOT of stuff early since I'm out of state. Hell, we have most stuff booked since before the end of May this year (some stuff booked last year) and our wedding isn't until May 2012... but I'm also trying to spread out decorating and shit because I know I won't be able to crunch it all into the few months leading up to the wedding seeing as I'll be finishing up my capstone project, still have class, working my clinical rotations, and preparing for graduation on May 12th (shoot me in the face plz).


I do understand why you say that though - I think I'm just frustrated with having to continue to put off talking about our wedding plans just because her wedding is next month.. especially when she has been planning since June (July?) of last year. :\ I think the only day she didn't say anything about her wedding in some way shape or form was the day we went dress shopping.. and only because my mom pretty much warned her she better not mention their wedding that day (because you do need SOME separation of the two).



This might sound petty but now I don't even know if I should make those damn signs. I just know how my sister can be and how some people in our family can be, and if it's one thing that irritates me it's people thinking I'm the copy cat.


PS - I did say something to my mom after she sent me the picture. I told her: "They look nice... even though I'm a little because I had told you I was going to make wooden signs for ours :/ But I know she will love them"

Then my mom wrote back, "Well don't be cause your surprise is EVEN BETTER!!! I'm not telling you either Nobody knows where the lodge is " (my sister's wedding is at this cabin place in my hometown)

So now I feel bad because I think my mom is all freaking out that I'm super upset or something.

[Edited on September 11, 2011 at 4:51 PM. Reason : FAMILY.]

9/11/2011 4:46:34 PM

I don't think it's petty at all. I really see where you're coming from. And having sisters, I know exactly how it can be... especially this part:

Quote :

"I do understand why you say that though - I think I'm just frustrated with having to continue to put off talking about our wedding plans just because her wedding is next month.. especially when she has been planning since June (July?) of last year. :\ I think the only day she didn't say anything about her wedding in some way shape or form was the day we went dress shopping.. and only because my mom pretty much warned her she better not mention their wedding that day (because you do need SOME separation of the two)."

My sisters had a hard time not making my wedding about them, even when they weren't brides! They wanted to take my dress shopping day, and turn it into bridesmaids dress shopping. And it's going to feel like a competition. So, as far as the signs go, just do it better. You've got the benefit of being the second wedding, so you can learn from the things you didn't like about hers.

What kinds of signs are you thinking? I'm picturing something along the lines of these photos, which can be very personalized and unique. And if all else fails, just sit your Mom down and tell her not to use the signs.

http://bios.weddingbee.com/pics/48136/thank_you.jpg
http://bios.weddingbee.com/pics/130414/_DM_1207_2.jpg
http://static.weddingwire.com/static/wedding/815001_820000/819124/community/400x400_1301007264892-thankyou.jpg
http://bios.weddingbee.com/pics/137374/thank_you.jpg

[Edited on September 11, 2011 at 4:54 PM. Reason : ]

9/11/2011 4:53:28 PM

Do what you want and stop caring about what she does, even if she steals everything you came up with. Who cares if people think you're a copy cat instead? No wedding is truly unique: I'm pretty sure you're not the first person to ever have whatever idea it was in the first place.

It's okay, just get over it and enjoy the things you've planned for your wedding. It's that simple! Cheer up!

9/11/2011 5:02:32 PM

^2 I wanted to do one of those old timey "crossroads" signs with the arrows pointing in different directions.. yeah they did exactly what I told my mom. -.-

I do know one thing that would really, REALLY upset me besides these signs - at the same time I told my mom about these things, I told her how I wanted to take wooden letters and paint them, then have a phrase on each important table. Like, for example, on the candy bar have "love is sweet" (which I know isn't original, but I was going to make it my own and do some really cool stuff to the letters). Then have something for our sweetheart table, the bar ("get crunk" ), etc. If I found out she was doing that (she meaning my mother for my sister, or my sister seeing as she was there when I mentioned it), I would be pretty upset.


^ My sister didn't do anything in this case... My mother ripped the idea. And I realize I am not the first person to have this idea, I was just a little sad because crap like this keeps happening.


[Edited on September 11, 2011 at 5:41 PM. Reason : .]

9/11/2011 5:38:33 PM

Just curious, but why share your ideas with them when this seems to consistently happen. Do you need them in order to complete your plans? I planned everything out of town and didn't really tell my mom squat because whenever I did she was just a negative nancy. Sometimes it's just better to leave family out of planning.

9/11/2011 7:36:38 PM

I told my mom and sister this before it reallyyyyy started happening. As of late, I have been keeping a lot to myself...

NOTHING IS SAFE

9/11/2011 9:34:23 PM

I'm down to about 4 weeks til wedding day. I've never really been as excited for anything in my life. My mom has been the best side kick ever. I've had a few melt downs, but nothing that I couldn't back up and be like - "DUDE- we're talking colors of table clothes- not global economic policy." So, I'm just here to say- I think everything is going to fall in to place.

I have drained a lot of money flying back to NC 3 times for things though.

9/12/2011 10:35:48 PM

Just under 6 weeks away!

We are having our wedding in downtown Raleigh. Does anyone have any suggestions on where we can take our group wedding photos? Is Moore or Nash Square ok or are there better places?

9/13/2011 11:42:49 AM

Good luck Lauren

We had our engagement pics don't at Moore Square.. I can share some pics with you if you want

9/13/2011 12:14:50 PM