I hope you get a job. A texas chick killed herself after returning from 2 years traveling the world with her husband.

2/14/2014 7:31:15 PM

O...K...not sure what you're driving at there, but alright.

2/14/2014 7:34:14 PM

I like the sound of the office job. Good Luck!!

Also, I couldn't imagine "shit shaming" someone as part of my job. It's a strange world you live in and I find it fascinating. Thanks for the stories.

[Edited on February 14, 2014 at 7:46 PM. Reason : craziness]

2/14/2014 7:43:42 PM

I just hope you get a job that allows you to regale us with more wonderful stories!

2/14/2014 8:04:29 PM

I completely forgot about the Battle of Ikpinle. Ikpinle is my village.

Now, I wasn't there for the event, sadly. I was at the beach for Christmas. But here is what I was told happened:

The gendarmes (military police force) came to shut down all the illegal gasoline sellers in town. Virtually all gasoline in Benin is sold by women/children on the side of the road with big glass containers of gas that they siphon into old liquor bottles and pour into your tank through a filthy rag on a funnel. This state of affairs is unusual even in Africa, I should point out. That gas is all smuggled across the border from Nigeria (six miles from my house), and it's illegal. Legally, you have to go a gas station. There are about a dozen of these in the country, several of which are broken at any given time and all of which are concentrated in the two biggest cities. In short, the country absolutely cannot operate on legal gas, but the president wanted to flex his muscles so he decided to enforce the laws/piss people off.

So anyway, the gendarmes showed up and started messing with people, and the village went bonkers. They burned broken down vehicles to block side roads. They set fire to gendarme vehicles. The gendarmes shot at the people but, as my smartest neighbor (a college-educated teacher) explained, "some Beninese people are immune to bullets," and that's why nobody was injured. Eventually the gendarmes fled.

Here's what I think actually happened, based on evidence and the idea that people are not magical:

The army guys showed up and some broken down cars got burned up, as advertised. I believe that because a couple of them were still around when I arrived. Some other garbage was used to make roadblocks. The gendarmes fired a few rounds into the air to show people that they could shoot them if they wanted, then they left. This makes the most sense to me because, magic kevlar skin aside, shooting at civilians is just not a very Beninese thing to do.

I got back the next day and, anyway, there were just as many people selling gas by the side of the road as there ever were.

---

My girlfriend recently found out that she has the safest post in Benin. Her neighbor is in charge of whipping every thief caught in her village. Whipping. With a whip. People avoid his house.

---

I have not had a cigarette in 225 days. Quit cold turkey. I did, however, enjoy a cigar on the beach a few months ago.

---

Speaking of day counts, today is exactly 600 days since I left the US. I haven't left Benin that whole time, unless you count 30 minutes spent walking aimlessly and illegally into Burkina Faso with two armed, uniformed gendarmes in what technically qualifies as an act of war (specifically an amphibious invasion, we had to cross a river)

2/15/2014 3:59:54 AM

lol Africa

2/15/2014 4:00:46 AM

Im going to ask my now roommate, who was there a few months ago, about the gas tomorrow.


Also, he said something about the whipping guy...and the amount of naked children.

Also, he is super set on learning french now.

PS he lost 25 lbs while he was there for 6 months.

2/15/2014 4:43:40 AM

GrumpyGOP. Amazing reading material. A single gas station is their gold mine and we have one on every street corner.

2/15/2014 6:51:00 AM

I went to the prison again last weekend. I hadn't been since November, and security has gotten even more lax. They just waved us through. I could have smuggled in an AK-47 without much trouble.

---

You aren't kidding about gas stations being a gold mine. And on the same lines, what they call a supermarket looks like a convenience store in both size and selection. These are also limited to the big cities and are almost exclusively run by Lebanese immigrants.

The Lebanese are crucial to Peace Corps in West Africa. They own all of the supermarkets and most of the decent restaurants. Also, most lady PCVs end up fucking at least one Leb. There are several reasons for this:

1) Lady PCVs outnumber dude PCVs approximately 3:1, so there isn't a lot of American dick to go around.
2) There's a host of issues that come with dating Africans (although a lot of PCVs do so). It can be especially difficult in smaller villages where everybody knows what you're up to.
3) The Lebs have money. There are a couple of nice bars in Cotonou. PCVs can't afford to go to these places, even though the prices are comparable to or lower than what you'd pay in the states. Very few Africans can afford to go to them. But Lebs can afford to go to them, and Lebs can afford to bring dates there. They can even afford to bring their dates' friends there.

So anyway, when a girl starts hooking up with one of these guys, we call it "joining Peace Corps Lebanon."

3/3/2014 5:38:02 AM

Did you see hear that Jeopardy had a category for Benin? Aired 2-27.

3/3/2014 9:21:45 PM

http://hbo.vice.com/episode-nine/ep-9-seg-2
This is a pretty excellent show on the bootleg gasoline in Africa.

3/3/2014 10:06:02 PM

Quote :

"Did you see hear that Jeopardy had a category for Benin? Aired 2-27."

Hahaha, yep. We're all getting a pretty big kick out of that. Even I think Benin is too obscure for a Jeopardy category.

And moron, looks interesting (and probably accurate). I've been really intrigued by some of the stuff I've been reading about VICE since I've been here -- it seems to keep coming up in the news that I get. Part of me really wants to work for them. Their international coverage is pretty much my dream job -- go to odd place where something weird is happening, then crack jokes and offer commentary about it. They should let me do a voodoo episode.

3/4/2014 4:24:06 AM

I find this to be the most interesting thread on tww right now. I'd like to ask you random questions. Some will be generic, but I find asking interesting people generic questions can sometimes be interesting. Anyway,
1. Other than people and food what do you miss most about America?

2. What do you not miss that you thought you would?

3. Do you think the people in your village handle stress better than Americans or is it unfair to compare the two?

3. What have you learned about yourself that you probably never would have if you hadn't joined the peace corps?

3/4/2014 8:27:19 AM

While I like Vice, I feel compelled to post these links as I love Gawker.

http://gawker.com/the-revolution-will-not-be-vice-1165948487
http://gawker.com/vice-is-very-touchy-about-its-wonderful-work-on-behalf-1535223061

3/4/2014 9:45:51 AM

Alright, bmel, thanks for the questions. I was hoping to get stuff like this.

Quote :

"1. Other than people and food what do you miss most about America? "

This varies on probably an hourly basis, depending on what the latest problem is. Customer service is a big one. The concept just doesn't exist. Waitresses, vendors, etc., if they aren't your personal friend, often act like you are human garbage and that they are doing you a favor by taking your money. A main way that this manifests itself is in the change problem. People HATE to give you change, and the banks HATE to give small bills. So even simple purchases can be a nightmare. I just came from the bank, and I was paid all in 5000 and 10000 CFA bills (10 and 20 dollars), the largest denominations they have. My aerage purchase in village is probably about 500 francs, but I'll have to carefully plan ahead to make sure that I go to a place that will break the bills first. I definitely miss, to the point of dreaming about, the ability to walk into any store or restaurant in America with a $20 bill, getting friendly or at least neutral service, and not having to think twice about whether they'll give me change in addition to my delicious food (which is definitely the number one thing)

Other than that...my car, for sure, and the freedom that it represents to get up and go. In village I have my bicycle, but it's the hottest part of the year right now and I live on a hill. Other than that, I have to use a mototaxi or regular taxi, which is a nightmare.

Quote :

"2. What do you not miss that you thought you would? "

Running water. I love my latrine. The only time I miss running water is in the height of the dry season, when I have to carry a big fucking jug of it about a block from a guy that sells it. The neighbor kids would carry it for free, but I have the white guilt. And most of the time I don't miss AC because my electricity is reliable and my fan is a champ, though the past couple of days have been pretty brutal.

Quote :

"3. Do you think the people in your village handle stress better than Americans or is it unfair to compare the two?"

It's probably not quite fair to compare them but I will anyway. I think they handle it much better. There's been a study floating around that says Benin is the most depressed country on Earth, based on mostly economic and social data. That's bullshit. I've never heard of a Beninese person committing suicide. In America, it's one of the leading causes of death in several demographics. It's rare to see a person in village be truly angry (although they do love to put on a show of it sometimes). As a rule, they don't like to show emotion, and if they are stressed or upset their default response is to smile and laugh (which is confusing as shit for me, obviously).

On the other hand, a big part of all that is that their attitude is "dieu va faire," as in "God will handle it." There is a very serious belief that problems shouldn't even be bothered with, because it's God's plan and he'll take care of it. People even sometimes won't wear moto helmets for this reason (everybody else refuses to wear them, too, but the reasons vary). So in that sense they don't handle stress well because they don't try to fix the problems causing the stress.

Quote :

"3. What have you learned about yourself that you probably never would have if you hadn't joined the peace corps?"

That apparently it doesn't take much to make me extremely attractive to women. Haha. It's bizarre, I have become a very highly sought-after commodity in this country, and I mean among the other volunteers.

But no, that's a dumb answer. Uh...let's see...I've learned that I am, in fact, capable of sitting quietly for long periods of time, which I had previously thought impossible (and why nobody has ever asked me to join them for fishing or hunting). Peace Corps and Benin FORCE you to do it.

I've also been surprised to learn that I, a pathetic coward in some situations, am in fact remarkably calm about imminently life-threatening things (elephant charges, most taxi rides, etc.) It never occurred to me that I might be the only calm person in a vehicle where everybody else was screaming in mortal terror.

Send more questions, I should have regular access this month.

[Edited on March 13, 2014 at 5:15 PM. Reason : ]

3/13/2014 5:13:09 PM

You come back soon, right?

Do you have any immediate plans? Do you have a career in mind or lined up?

Will you meet some TWWers for a beer or whatever somewhere?

Also, i would wager a LOT of money you could probably get a job with Vice. Your blog entries alone, IMO, are of good enough quality for consideration...

[Edited on March 13, 2014 at 5:35 PM. Reason : ]

3/13/2014 5:28:11 PM

My two years is up in September, but as I've mentioned in the last couple of pages, I'm trying to extend for a third year. Right now that looks like a more office-type job helping with mosquito net distribution, based out of Cotonou.

If I get the third year job, I get a free trip home for about a month. Adding some of my vacation days to that, my ideal plan has me coming home just before thanksgiving and leaving for Benin again just after Christmas. But we're a long way from knowing any of that. I won't even know if I've got a third year job until May at the earliest.

If I don't get the job, I'd be home for good in August or September.

Career-wise after the fact? I've been trying for years to get into the Foreign Service, and keep getting rejected. That was always the plan, but now I'm giving up. Otherwise...I'm working on writing some stuff about my meetings with the genocide guy, and I'd like to shop it around. That's as much as I've got.

3/13/2014 6:46:07 PM

I have never met you and definitely enjoy reading your posts. Even though I don't make it a habit to go to TWW outings with folks I don't know IRL, I think I would. You've definitely earned a free beer from all of your readers.

I have a question for you. I know at the beginning you were interested in folks sending you files and DVDs to watch and liked using a Kindle and staying up to date. I use an iPad/PC for damn near everything from reading books, watching shows, but living in such a rural and disconnected location, do you miss not having that connection to technology? Are you looking forward to having a desktop, laptop, HDTV, smartphone and tablet again, or do you really just not give a shit anymore? Since you have lived a relatively unplugged life in Benin I wonder if you see it as something useful you now appreciate more or just a toy to waste time.

Also the photographer in me wants to know, have you been photographing your travels? Did you take a P&S camera and have been loading up your laptop with shots? Your stories are great but if you had pictures it could make for an epic storytelling session one day when you get back.

[Edited on March 13, 2014 at 7:02 PM. Reason : ]

3/13/2014 7:01:14 PM

Quote :

"do you miss not having that connection to technology? Are you looking forward to having a desktop, laptop, HDTV, smartphone and tablet again, or do you really just not give a shit anymore?"

Well, I've never had a smartphone or tablet, so I guess I can't miss those (although I have now decided that a smartphone is my first purchase when I get home).

I'm also not completely unplugged. I've had consistent access to a kindle, thank God, and it is the most important thing I have. And, with certain unfortunate gaps, I've always had a laptop for TV and music.

I do miss regular internet access, which I have kinda-sorta acquired recently, hence these posts. But it is slow and limited (1gb a month) and generally shitty. I'm not watching Youtube or anything. And I miss video games. I have been an avid gamer since Wolfenstein 3D (and really before, since I did some text-based stuff as a very young kid and my dad's Caypro). So I miss my desktop and I miss the consoles that I never owned but always seemed to live with somebody who did.

Even simple things like a cell phone with a regular American phone plan. I have to buy little prepaid cards here, and calls are actually kind of expensive (which is why Beninese people on the phone always shout and talk way too fast for me -- or other Beninese people -- to understand).

Normally I don't miss TV, because I've got the laptop and the "morale drive" at the workstation filled with pirated movies and shows. But some shows aren't really suited for this, including daily ones like Jeopardy, Daily Show, and Colbert Report, which always used to be my evening lineup. And of course, live sports are pretty much out of the question (we did manage to stream the super bowl this year, though)

Quote :

" have you been photographing your travels? Did you take a P&S camera and have been loading up your laptop with shots?"

Yep! And a fair number of them are on facebook. I have trouble loading them onto hear because of technology issues. But more importantly, I have very bad luck with my camera. I never seem to have it when the really entertaining things happen, because I don't carry it with me everywhere because electronics take a beating in travel here. Also, the Beninese are tricky about photos. If they can pose they love it and will not let you stop taking pictures of them, but candid shots of daily life seem to irritate them. And if you take a picture of the cool cultural stuff, somebody is going to want money.

But what the hell, I'll try to post a couple here as a teaser.

3/14/2014 3:07:27 AM

Let's see if I remember how to do this:



This is an egungun, or revenant -- a spirit that wanders around and cadges donations from people in exchange for spiritual protection. Do NOT refer to it as a guy in a costume around the locals, they will get pissed.



The afforementioned gas

[Edited on March 14, 2014 at 4:01 AM. Reason : ]

3/14/2014 3:44:53 AM

Awesome, thanks for the responses!

I'm pretty sure I haven't used cash in about 2 months. I find it annoying and time consuming to dig it out my purse and then wait for change. Never really thought about how I was taking it for granted.

Do you miss your hawaiian shirts?

Did you think it would be this difficult to "help" your village? It kind of seems that everyone is against you, even though you have good, genuine ideas.

How much weight have you lost?

3/14/2014 8:28:59 AM

Great responses, though I thought your Kindle had died somewhere along the way so you were SOL on getting another one.

Last week I thought about this thread because of an email I got. The church we used to go to sponsors some missionaries, one of which is a lady in Ethiopia. She was supposed to get on a minibus for a day trip, but at the last second felt that the spirit told her not to get on the bus. She stayed in the village and they got word later in the day that the bus had been in an accident. It was a head-on collision with a full size tour bus and killed all 16 people from her village on the minibus. So any crazy near death experiences on your part or have you been fortunate in that regard?

3/14/2014 8:29:42 AM

Missionaries suck.

3/14/2014 9:59:54 AM

Quote :

"I'm pretty sure I haven't used cash in about 2 months."

In all of Benin there are maybe three or four places that will take cards, all of which are in Cotonou. I know Erevan (which is basically a Super Target run by Armenians, for some reason) and probably the Best Western hotel near the airport do (this hotel being so fancy, for visiting delegations, that I am probably not allowed through the door).

Quote :

"Do you miss your hawaiian shirts? "

Yep. I've got one. Before we arrived people talked as though they would be unacceptable to wear in village, which is bullshit. You could wear a clean hawaiin shirt to church here.

Quote :

"Did you think it would be this difficult to "help" your village?"

I expected to be frustrated. I didn't expect quite the level of apathy I get faced with sometimes, though. Even when I'm basically offering free shit, sometimes people don't care. That said, I have it a lot better than most volunteers. My counterparts here are super motivated and we've gotten a lot done already, with one more project just approved and another hopefully following right after.

Now the great bane of everybody's existence is the grant application process, which was just changed and fucked up in much the same way Obamacare was, and probably by the same people. The application is now all online, which is an absurd thing to present to PCVs who usually dont' have electricity, let alone internet. Then they had to shut it down almost immediately because, whoops, they forgot to encrypt anythign and everybody's password got stolen. Then they re-released it but it required a more recent browser version than the ones on any Peace Corps computer, and in fact PC WAshington has not yet given permission to update those browsers, so basically nobody can do the fucking form.

Quote :

" How much weight have you lost?"

At my peak I was down 50 pounds to about 180. About 30 of that has come back, so I'm around 210. That's the weight at which I look about normal (remember I'm 6'6"). I was skeletal there for a while. And I was extra fat when I arrived because in the weeks leading up to departure I ate everything in sight, for obvious reasons.

Quote :

"Great responses, though I thought your Kindle had died somewhere along the way"

It was. Another PCV, who must be insane, let me borrow hers because she never used it.

Quote :

" So any crazy near death experiences on your part or have you been fortunate in that regard?"

Just about every time I get into a vehicle, something happens that, in America, would cause any of us to break into a cold sweat and think we had just had a brush with death. These people drive like they don't want to live. They HATE using the brakes, apparently on the theory that using brakes makes them wear out more quickly so you would have to replace them, or something. So they swerve, at full speed, to avoid other vehicles, wrecks, potholes the size of vans, goats, pigs, pedestrians, cows, and zangbetos (this has happened to me). And the roads are narrow, so they invariably swerve into oncoming traffic. Just yesterday coming back from the bank we came around a bend to find another taxi heading straight at us as it tried to pass a truck full of boulders. We swerved off the road and nearly down the hill.

I don't pay much attention anymore. Can't really do anything to avoid it. My girlfriend, though, still shrieks and tenses up several times during the hour long trip.

Since I've been here I know we've had two serious traffic accidents. In one case, PC washington started writing the kid's death certificate, but he recovered and is still serving. In another case, the kid certainly would have died had another volunteer not happened to pass the crash and see his helmet. He's still recovering in South Africa in serious condition.

3/14/2014 10:53:08 AM

Alright, so nobody else had questions but I don't give a shit because Africa. So I will double post.

I just spent the weekend at my girlfriend's village, a couple of hours north of mine. And this made me want to talk about the difference between our situations. See, within Peace Corps, there is a thing called "Posh Corps." This refers to any volunteer who has stuff that you don't. Within Benin, I live in Posh Corps, if only because I have electricity (although I can, in turn, call "posh corps" on those people that have running water, even though I prefer my setup to theirs). Within Peace Corps in general, it refers to whole countries. China is Posh Corps. So are most of the Eastern Europe assignments, where you're practically guaranteed electricity and refrigerators and even high speed internet access.

So like I say, I'm Posh Corps, especially compared to my poor girlfriend, who not only lacks power but pretty much everything else. Right now, at the end of the dry season, her market is limited to the following selection:

1) Onions
2) Shitty peanut crackers
3) Dried, smoked, atrocious fish of unknown provenance
4) Lafou (which is a manioc porridge with no taste or nutritional value, combined with the texture of shitty baby food)
5) Shit-all else

This is what Peace Corps can be like. Fortunately, she had a bag of rice and some peanut butter purchased last time she was at the capitol. So this weekend I ate white rice, white rice with fish, and white rice with peanut onion sauce.

In comparison, my village has the following:

1) Oatmeal
2) Sugar
3) Rice
4) Tomatoes
5) The Beninese version of spinach (a leafy green which may or may not contain vitamins)
6) Fish
7) Mean (goat and pork and, sometimes, chicken)
8) Eggs
9) Tofu
10) Spaghetti (although at this point all PCVs are so sick of this they'd rather just go hungry)
11) Toilet paper (not food but still important and unavailable at her place)
12) Cold drinks (beer, coca-cola, sprite, even pepsi some days -- I'm not a huge fan of pepsi but it is extremely rare in Benin)
13) ice
14) Fruits (oranges and bananas always, pineapples usually though not right now)
15) Carrots
16) Cheese (if you are very, very lucky and have low standards, cheese-wise)

I'm forgetting a few things in both cases but that gives a fairly accurate idea of what the disparity is like. So think about how much I bitch about my lack of things, and imagine how much worse it is for a lot of PCVs.

I hope more questions arise, I really enjoyed the last set.

3/17/2014 4:24:18 PM

OK, didn't intend to triple post, but as I was looking over this thread I saw some posts from way back in the beginning that should be addressed again by an older, wiser GrumpyGOP:

Quote :

"My wife studied abroad in Ghana for four months back in 2001. Pretty much everyone who was there was taking anti-malarials, and pretty much everyone still got malaria, her included. Take that for whatever it's worth. -Shadowrunner"

Quote :

"if you've ever taken antidepressants or other psych meds you should discuss that thoroughly with your doctor before you get a prescription for anti-malarial pills. the most commonly prescribed (and cheapest) can make you feel really, really bad. -GREEN JAY"

I was right on all counts. They did take my (very brief) history of medication into account, which is why they put me on doxycycline as opposed to mefloquine, which is the one that makes people go crazy. And after 21 or so months I've yet to have malaria. So these two doomsayers can eat a dick.

Quote :

"I think it'd be pretty hard to schedule a trip home for Christmas and miss out on things like Victoria Falls etc. But then again, I'm sure I'd get pretty daggone homesick if I didn't come back for Christmas."

I'm a long, long way from Victoria Falls. Peace Corps pays little enough that I haven't even been able to save up for a trip to Ghana, where almost everybody goes (it being nearby and having American food and amenities). A lot of people have taken that trip and even fancier ones, but other people had savings before they joined PC. I didn't even have enough to keep my bank account open. Every dime I have, came through PC. So I didn't have to choose between home or victoria falls or anything else. I stayed in Benin.

Quote :

" Once you're resolved with the fact you're not going home for Christmas and instead are going to see awesome shit you don't really get homesick -wolfpackgrrr"

Bully for you. I got homesick at both Christmases I've been gone. Of course, I didn't get to see awesome shit, either. Best case, I went to the beach for a couple of days.

3/17/2014 6:25:26 PM

Why is it such a big difference in food choices when there is only a 2 hour difference? The climate can't be that different, can it? Does she visit you more often since you're posh and all?

I actually have wanted to ask you questions about your girlfriend because the dynamic of your relationship intrigues me. I'll keep it simple for now and see how it goes.

Do you plan to show her your homeland and meet the family?


Random:
Have you learned any new recipes that you plan to bring home with you?

3/17/2014 9:47:50 PM

how much longer do you have to go? are you going to come back after this tour (if that's what it's called) or do another? still want to be a FSO?

3/18/2014 12:09:06 AM

ncsuallday, your first question is answered on this page -- I'm trying to do a third year. I still want to be an FSO but it is increasingly clear that they don't want me.

Quote :

"Why is it such a big difference in food choices when there is only a 2 hour difference? The climate can't be that different, can it? Does she visit you more often since you're posh and all? "

The climate isn't very different, no. But she lives in a village of maybe 2,000 people, half an hour from the paved road. I live in a town of 20,000+ people that straddles one of the two main (which is to say, paved) roads in Benin. So stuff gets to us more easily and there's a bigger market for it. Also, electricity means at least some degree of refrigeration, which helps improve variety. My town, being larger, has more ethnic diversity, and ethnicity can determine work here. For example, everybody who sells street meat or raises cattle is Hausa or Fulani. These groups aren't very common in the southern part of Benin but my town is large enough to attract a few.

She visits me more often, yeah. A fan is really important to having sex in Benin, for one thing. Plus she's always ashamed of the lack of food choices at her place, whereas I have a reputation for making big, elaborate meals.

Quote :

"Do you plan to show her your homeland and meet the family? "

My girlfriend is a Jewish girl from San Diego who has been to NC before. Sorry if I gave you the impression that she is a local. But yes, obviously if we are still dating when our service ends I would want her to meet the family.

I don't date HCNs (host country nationals), a policy I have set in stone since before I arrived here. It is not, repeat not, a racial thing. There are hearbreakingly beautiful women all over Benin, and I have no qualms with dating black girls. But culturally, it's a mess. Plus in village everybody knows what you are up to, so dating a local girl is a public affair and breaking up is very, very hard to do. I've talked to PCVs who date locals and the two things they always say is that you can't break it off cleanly, and the sex is terrible. Apparently in Benin there is one approved sexual position -- the girl lies on her back with her limbs spread out like a starfish, and she doesn't move. And they are resistant to suggestions for change.

Quote :

"Have you learned any new recipes that you plan to bring home with you?"

Haha, yes, but none of them are African. I've learned how to make some fairly decent "American" dishes with limited ingredients (my fried rice is famed throughout the land), and I've developed some new things that don't really have names but which I enjoy. The only African meal I think I'll miss back home is the goat and red sauce over rice that the restaurant next door makes, but it's not something I can really make at home. Goat meat is rare enough and goat meat chopped up in this particular fashion would be a huge pain to find.

3/18/2014 5:33:00 AM

Do you know any specifics about the electric generation serving your village? More specifically, does the village have its own generating equipment or do they run lines from a good ways off? Is it pretty reliable service?

3/18/2014 6:41:27 AM

The electricity in my village is supplied by a power plant somewhere in Nigeria. To the best of my knowledge Benin has no power plants and imports all its power from there. For me, the border is about six miles east, though I'm pretty sure the lines enter the country about ten miles south, where I've seen a pretty big substation.

The power in my village is insanely reliable. I can't begin to say how lucky I am in that regard. I rarely have outages and when I do, they usually last a matter of hours. In my whole time here I've only had one outage that lasted more than a day, which means here in village my power gets turned on faster than it usually does back home. Oddly my power is more reliable than it is in Porto Novo, the capital, which is only about thirty miles away.

By contrast, my girlfriend in her little podunk town might occasionally benefit from her neighbor's generator, which he will sometimes turn on at night during the weekend. It serves several houses and a "bar" that is really just a shack with a refrigerator in it. The weird thing is, modern power lines have been run to her village. As far as I can tell the infrastructure is all in place, but for some reason they haven't turned on the juice.

Once you branch off from the power lines in my town, I should say that things start being gerry-rigged. Most of the lines are kinda-sorta held up by trees or branches shoved into the ground. They fall over a lot.

3/18/2014 10:24:10 AM

The acting director of peace corps and a couple of Senators are in Benin. Apparently my tomato project is going into a presentation about our successes, which is but I wasn't invited to come down and eat/bask in the glory which is more

Also just found out that the lady in charge of water and sanitation wants to come down tomorrow morning to look at my latrines and probably complain about them. Of course, it's too late for them to stop it now. I already got my motherfucking latrines.

Also just found out that the volunteers in charge of the mosquito net project have fucked up a bunch of stuff, and royally. For example, how to get the nets to our villages. It turns out they didn't think about that AT ALL. To get the 2000+ nets that my village requires will require probably two trucks at maybe 15000 CFA each, for a total that exceeds a third of my monthly pay. Then, having distributed the nets, I am to do regular home visits to each house.

"And how am I supposed to do this?"

"You know, just have them write down where they live."

"This is Benin. We don't have street addresses. Or street names. Or streets, usually."

"Oh...right. Hadn't thought of that."

I know that all development work is rife with incompetence, but this is a doozy even so.

3/18/2014 5:45:16 PM

Today I had a moment of brilliance that should have happened a year ago. I bought a coconut. I opened the coconut. I poured moonshine into the coconut water. It was glorious.

3/19/2014 4:45:38 PM

Congrats on the tomato success and getting the latrines pushed through in time.

Quote :

"Then, having distributed the nets, I am to do regular home visits to each house. randomly select thirty homes to visit regularly."

Seriously, I don't remember statistics, but 30 houses sounds like enough.

3/19/2014 8:07:49 PM

Quote :

"Apparently in Benin there is one approved sexual position -- the girl lies on her back with her limbs spread out like a starfish, and she doesn't move"

wow

3/19/2014 8:50:26 PM

I want to be the first (or at least one of the first) to thank Grumpy for his stories here.

Threads like this are what makes TWW [still] great.

If you don't agree, I welcome you to lick my balls.

3/19/2014 9:01:13 PM

I have been waiting patiently for this thread to get sexually explicit. I want Benin Peace Corps erotica.

3/19/2014 9:02:43 PM

I might have missed you posting about her , but do you still have Bea Dog? I knew people had been trying to eat her....

3/19/2014 9:12:34 PM

Quote :

"Seriously, I don't remember statistics, but 30 houses sounds like enough"

Agreed. And that's probably what is going to end up happening, because it is impossible to keep track of all of these families.

Quote :

"I have been waiting patiently for this thread to get sexually explicit. I want Benin Peace Corps erotica."

Jackpot, motherfucker:

http://www.literotica.com/s/palm-oil

Someone submitted this find to the humor magazine I run. Apparently on this website with thousands of sex stories, there is only one about Peace Corps, and it is from Benin. I read it; whoever wrote it had to be a PCV here, they've got all the details right.

Thankfully, it was submitted in early 2011, so no one in my class ever met the author.

Quote :

"I might have missed you posting about her , but do you still have Bea Dog? I knew people had been trying to eat her...."

Yep! Bea is still alive and well. I now feel very safe leaving her at the house when I leave, because the mama for my complex adores her. If anyone messed with Bea, it would be a race between mama and I to see who would get to kill the guy. She is one of very few Africans to show no fear of Bea. It's absurd -- she's a tiny dog, always friendly, always on a leash, and people flea as though I had a tyrannosaurus rex with me.

This reminds me of an incident about a year ago when Bea got pretty sick. Bloody diarrhea and the like. I was distraught. Then mama approached me. Mama does not speak any French and has only a few words of English, but somehow her vocabulary included the following sentence: "Do you want some ampicillin for your dog?" This from a woman who, when I go on errands, says, "OK, you go-come."

3/20/2014 3:30:22 AM

have you had any unique fauna encounters while there?

3/20/2014 7:46:01 AM

OP delivers... boners.

3/20/2014 7:47:01 AM

Quote :

"have you had any unique fauna encounters while there?"

Benin has gone to extraordinary lengths to eradicate its animal population, at least outside of the national parks. The "fauna" I see with any regularity fits into one of these categories:

1) Lizards, either a big blue/gray one with an orange head, or the smaller geckos
2) Bats, ranging in size from what you see in NC to something that looks like it could carry away a baby, neither of which are ever very close to me
3) A handful of hawks around town (but, strangely, no vultures or buzzards ANYWHERE in Benin. Walk outside anywhere in NC and look up, you'll probably find one of those. Not so here. My guess is that humans find and eat anything dead and large enough)
4) These tiny birds that make hanging nests that look like scrotums
5) Pests like mice and bugs

Some volunteers get scorpion infestations, but I've been spared. I've only seen one snake in Benin -- or at least, one LIVE snake. Beninese people instantly kill any snake they encounter, both for food and out of mortal fear that it is venomous. The one exception is the voodoo center at Ouidah, where pythons are sacred.

All that said, I did go to Pendjari national park up north, the better of the two parks in most opinions. While there, we took a boat ride on the river. It was a flimsy, leaky boat that looked to be made out of balsa wood. We came around a bend and smack into a family of hippos. Hippos kill more people every year in Africa than any other animal but the anopheles mosquito (which transmits malaria). Lions and leopards are sopping pussies next to hippos. One submerged and passed underneath us. My butthole puckered up.

In the park we also saw lions (boring and lazy as usual), hyenas (a rare treat), a ton of buffalo and gazelle, and many, many elephants. On our last day one of these charged our van, which was exciting and which made me feel special but now I'm increasingly convinced that the tour guides go out of their way to make this happen to every group that comes through.

But outside of the park? Any animal is either eaten or killed as a nuisance.

Other than that...well, there are the monkeys. These are usually patas monkeys, I think, never wild, always as pets. The Beninese people that have them like not warning you that they have a monkey, so that it can surprise and terrify you. A monkey has enormous, menacing teeth, and if you show up with a monkey bite, Peace Corps throws you out. It's a shame; I want to interact with them, but fear of losing my job is too great.

3/20/2014 10:56:16 AM

The power went out for a bit tonight (it's about 10 PM right now), and the sky was amazing. No clouds, no light pollution...except for everybody walking along the path in front of my house. Because, see, they all have cell phones. The cell phone is the most important thing to happen to Africa since independence, and I would argue that it is in fact MORE important to the average African than which corrupt and incompetent government is in charge. (The French ignore you and rob you, the Beninese president pays attention but robs you, it's a toss up)

There are smart phones here, sometimes real ones, sometimes Nigerian knockoffs, but the vast majority are simple models (Nokia if you're smart, a knockoff if you aren't) with an open slot for one or two sim cards, which must be purchased from one of the main cell service providers in Benin. In theory there are about a half dozen of these, but I've never known anyone to use most of them even though many stalls claim to sell the sim cards and credit for them. In practice, there is MOOV and there is MTN. Most PCVs have SIMs for both brands, because as you travel you are likely to lose the signal for one or the other.

To call someone on your network costs about 1 franc per second. A text message is between 14 and 25 francs, so nobody uses them except volunteers, and we only do it because there is a special program we can get in on that dramatically reduces the price. But even with calls, 1 CFA/sec seems like a very little...except to the locals. The locals are loathe to part with even that amount, so they will do one of two things:

1) They will "beep" you by calling, letting the phone ring once, and hanging up so that you will call them back and assume the expense.
2) They will call you and shout in loud and rapid French whatever it is they want to tell you. If you have a question (or just don't understand) they will become extremely exasperated.

It isn't just me that doesn't understand. Most Beninese people don't either. When you overhear a phone convo (and you can't help but overhear it, thanks to the shouting) it invariably goes like this:

"Hello! Where are you?"
"I am in [village]"
"Where?"
"Village."
"Where?"
"Village."

And so on for about twenty seconds that infuriate whoever is paying and whoever has to listen to it, especially when it is taking place two inches away from your ear in an overloaded taxi.

Also, a common feature of conversations is one or both people asking, "Who is this?" It is not unusual to receive a call from a person who asks who you are. I don't know why.

So you need to buy credit. You do it one of two ways, by buying little strips with scratch-off numbers (Usually worth 200 CFA or so, of which the vendor gets maybe 1 or 2 CFA), or you go to a guy with a special phone who can transfer larger amounts. Even though the margins are tiny EVERYBODY sells credit. I swear the entire economy of Benin is based on people selling phone credit to each other. When cell service reaches a town it is an economic boom. New stores open. Old stores expand. Advertisements go up.

But I got onto this whole cell rant talking about light pollution. Even the shittiest African cell phone has a flashlight on it. There are probably the most economical flashlights in Benin. Yeah, you can buy an actual flashlight for cheaper, but then you have to stock it with batteries, and nothing on earth is more useless than an African battery. For example, American batteries run my MP3 player for about 12 hours. African batteries run it for one. One hour. Max.

But a cell phone, well, a cell phone you can charge. Meaning you can charge the flashlight on it. And even if you don't have power, there is someone in your village with a generator who will charge your phone for very little. So in my village, when it gets dark, the cell phones come out in droves.

3/20/2014 5:20:43 PM

so what is your daily routine like?

3/20/2014 5:40:29 PM

just wondering what is the reasoning, exactly, behind getting kicked out over a monkey bite? to make sure you get treatment, or because it signals that you are a reckless fuck, or what?

3/20/2014 5:47:07 PM

I was going to ask the same thing...

Also what are some of the more scandalous things you've heard about PCVs being involved in...additionally what do PCVs normally get sent home for (besides monkey bites)

3/20/2014 6:18:53 PM

Quote :

"just wondering what is the reasoning, exactly, behind getting kicked out over a monkey bite? to make sure you get treatment, or because it signals that you are a reckless fuck, or what?"

Reckless fuck, I would think. When my dad was a PCV in Ghana, he and his buddy had a monkey, but now it is very much against the rules, probably because monkeys are such a potential disease vector and because they are pretty bitey, as pets go, and those bites frequently require attention. That said, there was a PCV in the class before me that owned two monkeys and had to see the doctors on two occasions for bites, and he didn't get kicked out (well, he did, but only because one of those bites happened right at the end of his service so it didn't make sense to treat him here and immediately send him home). Both times he told them it was a dog, and even though a monkey bite is pretty different from a dog's, they let it stay.

Peace Corps loves to threaten you with separation over medical stuff. If you get malaria more than once, you're out. Naturally this means a lot of people self-treat malaria. The medicine is available at any pharmacy in country at a price we can afford, so why risk getting kicked out? Of course, this led to a PCV from Ghana dying last year, but don't let that stand between the PC medical office and total incompetence.

I once had our doctor spend most of an hour trying to talk me out of getting an STD test. I hadn't done anything but was embarking on a new relationship and wanted to be able to show I was clean, which is what I had been taught was the right thing to do since 5th grade. She thought it was dumb. I finally had to say, "Doc, I'm not doing this for fun. You're about to stick a q-tip up my dickhole. If that hasn't convinced me not to go through with it, you certainly aren't going to."

Quote :

"so what is your daily routine like?"

Oh boy. Well, if I don't have something specific scheduled for the morning, I wake up around 8 -- three hours after most of my neighbors have, but they take a siesta at noon and I can't seem to manage to do the same. I take the dog for her morning walk and do laundry, if I have any to do. It dries on the line so early is better than late, especially now when rain is beginning to happen a little more often.

After that I'm usually hungry so I either walk to a street food place or the market, depending on what I feel like. Maybe grab a coke and read while I eat. By then it's noon and the country is shutting down for the siesta so I go back to the house and read, watch TV, play solitaire, rub one out, whatever.

After three I hopefully have something going on -- a club at one of the schools or a meeting or something. A lot of the time I don't, and I wander around, saying hello to people. That's important in Benin. Must greet people, all the time.

Around five I may go get a beer or two at the bar my boss's sister owns, where I read or talk to people I know. If my boss doesn't show up there I go to his house and we give each other updates on what is going on. Then I pass through the market again, and get whatever I need for dinner. Every few days I buy drinking water (in plastic bags), and if I'm feeling frisky, a half-liter of moonshine for about 60 cents (300 CFA).

Then I put a show on the laptop and start preparing dinner, which invariable involves chopping garlic and onions and tomatoes. Make dinner, watch TV, hang out with the neighbors.

At precisely 8:58 PM I take the dog on her evening walk and bring my shortwave radio to listen to the headlines on BBC newshour, which starts at 9. Then maybe more neighbors or TV, then sleep around midnight.

If this sounds like I don't do shit, you're right for a lot of days. Schedules here are fluid. Every now and then I have days when I run around buying and transporting building supplies, talking to potential partners, or even running trainings, but those are not most days. It isn't just me. One of the biggest reasons PCVs quit is that they don't have enough to do. Africa is not a "get it done" continent.

[Edited on March 20, 2014 at 6:37 PM. Reason : v]

3/20/2014 6:23:13 PM

Quote :

"Also what are some of the more scandalous things you've heard about PCVs being involved in...additionally what do PCVs normally get sent home for (besides monkey bites)"

Truth be told, you have to work pretty hard to get kicked out in most cases. I had a buddy who was in the big city, Cotonou, to learn how to be a trainer for the incoming class. He got drunk and took a bunch of valium from who knows where, then disappeared until the next morning. Everyone freaked out. Admin was called. When they found him, they told him he couldn't be a trainer, but they didn't kick him out. And Cotonou is by far the most dangerous place I have ever been, and I lived on Method Road.

There was a kid in the last class who got kicked out because during training he had two serious alcohol related issues. One time he never showed up at his host family's house, another time he threw up. That's fine for college, but bad to happen within a month of each other during the critical period of training.

We can get thrown out if we are caught not wearing a helmet while on a motorcycle, and I am 100% OK with that. Before I came to Benin I had seen 0 dead bodies. I think now I'm on 4, and all of them were from recent moto accidents. I know what your brain looks like, fresh.

Now, as to scandalous things PCVs have been involved in...I got a lot for that question. There are a bunch who smoke pot here, which is harder in some ways and easier in others than it is in the states. It's cheaper. It's hard to get caught. But it's a guaranteed ticket home if you are even suspected. Also, I know one girl who started fucking the main dealer (this girl is white and will loudly tell anybody in earshot that she has only ever fucked black guys and intends to keep it that way).

At a party fundraiser March of last year, which was supposed to raise money for girls' programs, the head of the girls' programs department (a notorious womanizer who treats females like scorecards) fucked one girl in the filthiest swimming pool I have ever seen. (I'm amazed her vagina didn't fall out, it was such a disgusting pool) In front of all of us. This led other people to join in; I fled. Public sex acts are actually pretty common at PC parties.

Pretty much everybody engages in illegal travel; I don't even consider it scandalous anymore.

Unapproved pets are common (possibly because only dogs and cats are approved. Hell, even I had a rabbit for a while). Being blackout drunk is a frequent occurrence. I go visit the genocide guy in prison, which would probably be a one-way ticket home if anybody found out.

I'm sure I'll think of others.

[Edited on March 20, 2014 at 6:35 PM. Reason : ]

3/20/2014 6:34:38 PM

illegal travel?

3/20/2014 9:14:41 PM

Peace Corps loves to give us incentives to break rules, and one example of that is the travel policy. Which policy is that really we should be staying in village and if we leave it much we get in trouble. But another policy is that, when we do travel, we should call one of our bosses and tell them where we'll be and for how long, because that's their only way of knowing. They don't have GPS trackers on us or anything.

So naturally what happens is that we all leave post more than we're "allowed" to and nobody calls to inform them. For example, in March I have left post "illegally" three nights, two spent with my girlfriend and one for a work meeting/party near Porto Novo. That's not such a big deal and I wouldn't call it scandalous, but their are other volunteers who disappear from their posts for a week or more at a time, tell nobody, and stay with either expats or the Beninese or Lebanese guy they happen to be fucking (it is overwhelmingly women who do this).

There's also people who make secret but short international trips, which are a good way to get kicked out if you get caught. It's illegal to go to Nigeria for ANY reason, though I did once, by accident (the border is not well-marked or guarded). I also snuck into Burkina Faso with some PCVs for about an hour when that was against the rules. Other people near the Togolese border will slip across it to go to the market because stuff is cheaper there.

3/21/2014 4:55:15 AM