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 Message Boards » » ATTN: Carrie Underwood Page [1]  
Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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"Right now he's probably slow dancing with a bleach blonde tramp,
and she's probably getting frisky...
right now, he's probably buying her some fruity little drink cause she can't shoot whiskey...

Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool-stick, showing her how to shoot a combo...

And he don't know...

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seats...
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires...

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

Right now, she's probably up singing some
white-trash version of Shania karaoke..
Right now, she's probably saying "I'm drunk"
and he's a thinking that he's gonna get lucky,
Right now, he's probably dabbing on 3 dollars worth of that bathroom polo
And he don't know...

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seats,
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires...

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl,
Cause the next time that he cheats...

Oh, you know it won't be on me!

Ohh... not on me...
Cause I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seats...
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires...

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

Ohh.. Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats...

Ohh... before he cheats..."

It sounds like you don't know what the fuck you're talking about. In fact it sounds like you're just some overly paranoid crazy bitch who doesn't trust her man when he goes out for a beer with the guys.

By the way, carving your name into a leather seat after keying a car, smashing headlights, and flattening tires is just asking to be arrested.

Sincerely,
Mr. Joshua

[Edited on July 1, 2007 at 3:46 AM. Reason : .]

7/1/2007 3:19:29 AM

Poetrickster
Suspended
686 Posts
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I've always wanted to make this thread. stupid bitch with her Louisville slugger.

7/1/2007 3:34:06 AM

Jen
All American
10527 Posts
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mabey she wants to get arrested, some women get off on being handcuffed and taken to the slammer

7/1/2007 3:35:02 AM

ShinAntonio
Zinc Saucier
18943 Posts
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I thought this thread would be about wanting to plow her.

7/1/2007 3:40:13 AM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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^^^STFU n00b
^^bwn?
^give it time

7/1/2007 3:45:02 AM

theDuke866
All American
52655 Posts
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^^^^, ^^^^^ yep

although i would like to plow her

7/1/2007 4:19:14 AM

jackleg
All American
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when you have no intelligence or personality to fall back on, you can always play the same role over and over again in different relationships with different people. gosh i remember that girl like it was yesterday. when we used to go to our special place. which girl? every girl. i'm like an ant, i just go through the motions. i have a brain, i guess, but it's really more like electrical impulses that make me take every first date to the same place. it's not that i don't care... i am just incapable of making intelligent conversation. i would use a different pet name for you than i did for my last girlfriend, but then i'd have to think... and base it on you. plus, it's not like she's here. so don't let it bother you. hell, she has a bigger right to complain than you. i'm just here because my dick made me.

7/1/2007 4:46:04 AM

iphotou
All American
13047 Posts
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ATTN: Mr. Joshua: It's a song and these are lyrics, which you might have noticed from other songs and lyrics may not be grammatically correct or based upon actual events.

7/1/2007 6:35:18 AM

Jere
Suspended
4838 Posts
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I approve this thread.

7/1/2007 8:03:55 AM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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^^ Maybe she should write a good song and leave out the stupid lyrics.

Now go back to your trailer trash photo op.

7/1/2007 1:16:36 PM

vinylbandit
All American
48079 Posts
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Woman, you don’t know me, but you can bet that I know you
Everybody in this whole darn town knows you too
I brought along our little babies, ‘cause I wanted them to see
The woman that’s burnin’ down our family tree

No, I didn’t come to fight
If he was a better man I might
But I wouldn’t dirty my hands on trash like you, no
Bring out the babies’ daddy, that’s who they’ve come to see
Not the woman that’s burnin’ down our family tree

Their daddy once was a good man, until he ran into trash like you
Take a look at the baby’s face and tell me who loves who
I brought along his old dog Charlie and the bills that’s overdue
The job you’re workin’...Lord, we need money, too

No, I didn’t come to fight
If he was a better man I might
But I wouldn’t dirty my hands on trash like you, no
Bring out the babies’ daddy, that’s who they’ve come to see
Not the woman that’s burnin’ down our family tree
No, not the woman that’s burnin’ down our family tree

7/1/2007 1:36:23 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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^Yeah, I have no clue what that is.

7/2/2007 12:06:13 PM

RawWulf
All American
9126 Posts
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I don't know what's going on. I quit.

7/2/2007 12:15:19 PM

Poetrickster
Suspended
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what exactly is "getting frisky". sounds like something a cat would do.

7/2/2007 12:17:12 PM

Madman
All American
3412 Posts
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WOW UR SUCH A BADASS CALLING MS. UNDERWOOD OUT ON AN INTERNET THREAD!!!!!!

7/2/2007 12:17:27 PM

Oeuvre
All American
6651 Posts
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I prefer this thread

/message_topic.aspx?topic=484171

[Edited on July 2, 2007 at 12:19 PM. Reason : .]

7/2/2007 12:18:39 PM

wishmewell
All American
719 Posts
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jesus take the wheel

7/2/2007 12:23:26 PM

Snewf
All American
63282 Posts
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jesus didn't even have a driver's license

7/2/2007 12:24:39 PM

Oeuvre
All American
6651 Posts
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alien?

7/2/2007 12:25:59 PM

APCrook
All American
1438 Posts
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seems like this song originated as a catchy chorus, but she needed to push the length to ~3 minutes or whatever so she barfed up these shitty verses with the word "probably" recurring frequently.

7/2/2007 12:31:28 PM

aea
All Amurican
5269 Posts
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damn.... i actually liked that song

7/2/2007 12:35:44 PM

ctnz71
All American
7207 Posts
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she did not write this song... she just sings it.

7/2/2007 12:42:49 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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I salute Madman for trying to call me out after I notice the absurdity of song lyrics.

Well done!

7/2/2007 2:43:22 PM

Madman
All American
3412 Posts
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I salute you for making an internet thread about country pop lyrics, fag.

7/4/2007 4:47:07 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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Whats gay about criticizing music, cutie pie?

7/4/2007 6:13:17 PM

ShawnaC123
2019 Egg Champ
46681 Posts
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this made me laff:
Quote :
"jesus didn't even have a driver's license"


The first few times I heard that song I thought she said "I carved my name into his legacy."

7/4/2007 6:14:59 PM

Madman
All American
3412 Posts
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Quote :
"What's straight about pop country music?"


fixed it for you

7/5/2007 12:54:58 PM

The Dude
All American
6502 Posts
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why are there no pics in this thread?

7/5/2007 12:59:57 PM

sd2nc
All American
9963 Posts
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Quote :
"Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

Ohh.. Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl
"

7/5/2007 1:09:10 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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Quote :
"What's straight about pop country music?"


Because this thread is a clear indication of my love for country pop.

Give it up, moron.

7/5/2007 1:37:39 PM

pocketduces
All American
1861 Posts
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how 'bout this carrie underwood is short not really all that attractive, her voice sounds horrible, as does her music and the lyrics are shit but I'd still hit it

7/5/2007 1:46:17 PM

ctnz71
All American
7207 Posts
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i like her voice....

7/5/2007 1:53:19 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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ttt to remind everyone that Carrie Underwood is a crazy bitch.

No amount of ripping off the Pretenders would change that.

8/8/2007 2:54:18 PM

ScHpEnXeL
Suspended
32613 Posts
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useless without pics

8/8/2007 3:22:50 PM

HockeyRoman
All American
11811 Posts
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Carrie Underpants.

8/8/2007 3:34:18 PM

AKSnoopy
All American
833 Posts
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^damn you beat me to it

8/8/2007 5:38:32 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
43948 Posts
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I'm still super pissed about this.

10/19/2007 3:32:56 PM

Skwinkle
burritotomyface
19447 Posts
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I thought you were criticizing her pronunciation. She does day probly, after all.

10/19/2007 3:36:38 PM

GraniteBalls
Aging fast
12262 Posts
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I'd have to put socks in their mouths, though.

10/19/2007 3:39:44 PM

JK
All American
6839 Posts
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I have to listen to this song in weightlifting

THIS DOES NOT GET YOU PUMPED

10/19/2007 3:39:53 PM

NyM410
J-E-T-S
50084 Posts
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^^ she looks way more curvy (good curvy not fat curvy) in that picture than any other I've seen... of course she is standing that way to make it look like that.

[Edited on October 19, 2007 at 4:03 PM. Reason : maybe that's because that isn't her... durrr... i'm not all up on my american idol]

10/19/2007 4:02:54 PM

pttyndal
WINGS!!!!!
35217 Posts
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romo is a homo. picked football over carrie underwood.

10/19/2007 5:39:04 PM

Jaybee1200
Suspended
56200 Posts
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^^ HHAHAHA

10/19/2007 5:48:37 PM

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