It's the greatest.

Shit loving roll call! holla!!

7/16/2007 10:05:40 PM

Hax0red?

7/16/2007 10:06:08 PM

I wish I could just poop all day long.

7/16/2007 10:06:10 PM

i wish i could devote one day a month to shitting and not shit the rest of the month

7/16/2007 10:07:28 PM

ahahaha wtf gross

7/16/2007 10:08:09 PM

7/16/2007 10:08:39 PM

i like the ones that build up overtime, and then you just have to sit on the toilet and smile!

7/16/2007 10:10:02 PM

oh shit, i thought this thread was about zxappeal

7/16/2007 10:10:42 PM

Plus we have that pleasure zone in the butthole so when poop passes we get tiny orgasms of love.

Scientific fact.

7/16/2007 10:10:53 PM

i just dropped a turd so straight you could use it as a ruler

7/16/2007 10:11:08 PM

this thread just made my jeans tighter

7/16/2007 10:11:28 PM

Oprah's doctor said your poop can be any letter of the alphabet as long as it's not the period.

Isn't it fun shooting out poop balls with a nice fart as the power? Too bad they're not good poops to have or I'd have it everyday!

7/16/2007 10:12:44 PM

i hate poop!

7/16/2007 10:13:47 PM

Blaspheme!

7/16/2007 10:14:39 PM

7/16/2007 10:15:47 PM

^that book made me the man i am today

7/16/2007 10:16:41 PM

That picture of the man does look like he has a nice stinky turd on his head, I mean look at his face. He's either smelling his bumpy turd hair or is Asian.

[Edited on July 16, 2007 at 10:18 PM. Reason : ENGLISH SUCKS!]

7/16/2007 10:17:35 PM

so this is you then?

7/16/2007 10:17:55 PM

^yeah, but there's something else in my pipe

7/16/2007 10:18:37 PM

I recommend this reading as well

7/16/2007 10:19:26 PM

shitting at work is the best

tiger woods on my phone and getting a paycheck

fuckin' a

7/16/2007 10:19:56 PM

http://ncst.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2200558493

7/16/2007 10:20:49 PM

My problem is the bathroom is right behind the front desk and it usually happens that my noisiest poops occur when there's an audience.

7/16/2007 10:21:23 PM

If you love shitting, you will also love getting your shit pushed.

SCIENTIFIC FACT.

7/16/2007 10:21:24 PM

heh.

7/16/2007 10:21:40 PM

I always wanted to try the food the barenstein bears eat, looks so interesting!

I like to read whilst pooping, it's just not the same without some material, I'll even go so far as to read toothpaste instructions if no material is present at time of launch.

Scientific fact!

7/16/2007 10:23:48 PM

^no doubt

7/16/2007 10:25:48 PM

i dunno
I just quickly poop and then prolly go run...

7/16/2007 11:47:01 PM

bout to take another dook

7/19/2007 10:46:15 PM

My poops are finally back to normal. Thank Goodness!

7/19/2007 10:49:10 PM

Quote :

"i wish i could devote one day a month to shitting and not shit the rest of the mont"

what a dreary month...pooping is one of the highlights of my day

by the same token, I don't think I'd want to do it all day


P.S. This is my favorite Kiwi thread of all time


[Edited on July 19, 2007 at 10:54 PM. Reason : /]

7/19/2007 10:49:25 PM

Quote :

"shitting at work is the best"

7/19/2007 10:50:49 PM

my poops are generally uncomfortable...i think i have a slow colon because it's been this way for life

7/19/2007 10:51:08 PM

When I ate poorly my poops were about once a week with thundering canonballs. since I've been dieting it's more often with soft stools in the shape of alphabetic letters.

AAAAAAAAAMEN

7/19/2007 10:54:36 PM

At first I didn't see poorly when I glanced at that post, so the first part read:

Quote :

"When I ate poorly my poops"

And I was like

Then I reread the post and I was like

7/19/2007 10:57:34 PM

Quote :

""

My brother got this for my grandma one christmas, and I had never seen her laugh so much in my life

7/19/2007 10:58:07 PM

this thread ruined my buzzzz

7/19/2007 11:07:17 PM

srsly

7/19/2007 11:11:08 PM

Did you think a thread titled "I love shitting" would have rainbows and fairies inside?

JEEZ

7/19/2007 11:21:44 PM

maybe we thought it was a joke you huge disgusting whore

7/19/2007 11:23:15 PM

sometimes I agree with your statement until the poop is crampy or too hard!!! But the final release is always the bestest ever!!!

7/19/2007 11:25:41 PM

wtf

7/19/2007 11:35:38 PM

[user]kiwi[/kiwi], you never cease to shock and amaze me... fo'real yo

7/19/2007 11:57:45 PM

If you love shitting, you will also love getting your shit pushed.

SCIENTIFIC FACT.

7/20/2007 12:00:34 AM

"Well, were Catholic, see...."

"Oh, then you need You're a Naughty Child, and that's Concentrated Evil Coming out the Back of You"

7/20/2007 1:02:49 AM

just had a type 4...was wonderful

7/25/2007 2:14:43 PM

So I had a little run-in with my doctor last year. I asked for a Plan B prescription - this was before it became readily available over the counter. Keep in mind that Plan B pill it is NOT an abortificant, it won't do anything if you already pregnant. My (Catholic) doctor raised both of his eyebrows and said in his most appalled tone of voice - "We don't do that here!" I am sorry? What?! You prescribe birth control, don't you? This is merely a double dose of birth control. Not RU-486 that causes a miscarriage, simply a pill that prevents pregnancy if your condom breaks or slips off while you fail miserably to execute a graceful flip from a reverse cowgirl to doggy style or vice versa. Nope. No good. He wouldn't give me a script. So here I am, a grown woman, with a health insurance and a FLEX plan, making an appointment with the local Planned Parenthood. You know, the same PP that us teenage girls used in college so the parents wouldn't find out what we were up to. I was at least 10 years older than the average patient there. In the end, it took me three weeks to get my hands on Plan B last summer, the irony is, the medication has to be taken within 24-48 hours to be effective. Good thing I didn't need it urgently or anything.

In any case, that's how my relationship with Planned Parenthood got started - big F.U. to the schmuck who wanted to impose his religious beliefs on my health and lifestyle. Today, I had my annual exam, because I am one of those "happily promiscuous" women, and when I say I am D&D free, I want to be damn sure that it's true. For my own peace of mind, if not yours. The legs-in-the-stirrups part went as smoothly as KY jelly on two fingers, nurse practioner making it as easy as one can expect under the circumstances. She cheerfully declared that everything looks great and sat down to discuss the rest of my paperwork.

Have you ever seen those multi-page double-sided health history questionnaires they make you fill out? There are no less than three places where you have to indicate when was the last time you had sex (er... half hour before the appointment? I showered! Really! I did!). Then indicate what kind of sex you usually have (check all that apply): oral, anal, vaginal. Gender of your partners: Male, female, both. You get the idea.

I could see the nurse's eyes get a little bigger as she read my answers. Then she paused and asked me how many partners I had in the last 90 days. I was caught off guard by an unexpected question, still half naked and draped with a flimsy paper towel. I can't think well when my pants are off, which come to think of it, explains quite a bit about my life. I stalled a bit, asking innocently if I missed that question somehow, while in the back of my mind I was panicking, desperately trying to remember every Dick I met in the last 90 days and how fucking long ago did I meet that guy from Minneapolis and god dammit I need to peruse NSA section a little less and for real how many did I fuck and do I have to count random blow jobs or having sex with an ex-boyfriend omg I can't tell her THAT number am I really such a slut she is going to call CDC and a swat team in biohazard suits will show up for pete's sake!!! I finally squeaked out a number. She did a double take. That many? In the last 90 days? I stammered and said "let's not go there". Really, I know how fucked up I am, but I definitely did not check Yes on the question "do you have any concerns about sex you would like to discuss today?".

The nurse, without missing a beat, said "You know what, have as many partners as you want! Just practice safe sex!" and opened up a medicine cabinet. "Here are a few for the road!" she chirped, dumping rolls of condoms in a little goody bag with pamphlets she had sitting on the table next to my chart. Shocked that someone can be so accepting, I stuttered and said "Just how many do you think I need?!" She smiled and said "As many as it takes!" I was speechless. Thank you, nurse practioner. You rock. You were absolutely wonderful today. You not only had an outstanding bedside manner that more than a few doctors should acquire but you also showed genuine kindness and understanding that is so rarely seen anywhere today, much less in medical profession. Most of all, thank you for not judging and thank you for supporting me.

And as long as I am on the subject of support, I would like to remind everyone who bemoans that Planned Parenthood supports abortion, that they also provide reduced fee STI testing and condoms to those who otherwise wouldn't have either, curbing spread of diseases throughout general public. For many, Planned Parenthood is their only access to affordable reproductive health care. And if you think that your holier than though persona doesn't have to worry about it, go through the nearest Craigslist NSA section and see how many married religious business professionals are out there looking for random play (I should know, I slept with a few of them). Then think about it again. Then write a check to Planned Parenthood, along with a thank you note.

So long story short, tomorrow is a Friday night, I have about five dozen condoms here and a clean bill of health. Anyone wants to go out for drinks?

7/25/2007 2:47:06 PM

))<>((

forever

7/25/2007 2:52:44 PM

just had a 3-4-5 combo

7/26/2007 7:17:14 PM

settin up for the deuce

7/26/2007 7:17:33 PM