I present to you, Calvin Gates, storyteller extraordinaire:

http://www.myfoxal.com/myfox/MyFox/pages/sidebar_video.jsp?contentId=4658351&version=1&locale=EN-US

Another hilarious video from the proud state of Alabama.

9/8/2008 2:34:28 PM

that guy must have to drink a lot of fluids

9/8/2008 2:45:01 PM

lawl

9/8/2008 2:51:41 PM

I shoulda been wearing adult depends... but I wasn't

9/8/2008 3:02:39 PM

Wow that dude is awesome.

<3 the spitting every minute or so.

9/8/2008 3:10:37 PM

HAHAHAHA

9/8/2008 3:16:01 PM

I went to lookin' I said my goodness!

We need to quit killing each other and bring this together.

[Edited on September 8, 2008 at 3:18 PM. Reason : ]

9/8/2008 3:17:55 PM

he was soooo attempting to burglarize that house.

9/8/2008 3:19:27 PM

Co' mine.

I work in the co' mine.

[Edited on September 8, 2008 at 3:20 PM. Reason : ]

9/8/2008 3:19:34 PM

I just walked down the street and I thought I would check this house out cause ya know, I'm a man that likes to purchase houses.

9/8/2008 3:20:32 PM

That mofo was going to rob the place.

9/8/2008 3:24:05 PM

It somebody kill that man.

9/8/2008 3:25:28 PM

*rotflmao*

The more I listen, the funnier it gets.

"A dummy would move."

9/8/2008 3:26:02 PM

Hahaha "I shoulda had a Depend on"




I wonder if there are hicks in every culture of the world?

Like are there Chinese rednecks? Eskimo? Peruvian? This is an important question that needs to be investigated.

9/8/2008 3:50:29 PM

i broke to da left, then i broke to da right

i ain't skurred of no red-headed devil

9/8/2008 5:49:02 PM

that is absurd.

9/8/2008 6:41:29 PM

he talks like leon phelps

9/8/2008 6:48:28 PM

good stuff

9/8/2008 6:58:23 PM

I said, "mmm. Dats a man."

9/8/2008 7:17:03 PM

He anywhere from forty back down.

9/8/2008 7:24:35 PM

"you know what, i think we should get our lives...uh.....uh.....you know dis what yall need to erase this "

"i went to the left, i went to the right, and..you know..it got a big basement into it, the i went to the left ...and BOOM......two feet were stickin up"

9/8/2008 8:53:18 PM

I SHOULDA HAD A DEPEND ON

9/8/2008 11:08:10 PM

Quote :

"I like to buy houses"

haha

9/8/2008 11:25:24 PM

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_6hd611yjHI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_6hd611yjHI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

9/9/2008 10:54:36 AM

"He didn't jus go in there and die, somebody killed that man."

this is awesome.

9/9/2008 11:21:59 AM

By the way, the guy he mentions at the end who will "fix" that kind of thing is the mayor of Birmingham. Apparently the mayor is totally incompetent and just like our friend Calvin Gates when it comes to most issues.

9/9/2008 2:53:46 PM

"I leaned in and it weren't no dummy, a dummy would move!"

9/9/2008 3:06:26 PM

to the left to the left
to the right to the right
now dip baby dip
dip baby dip

red-headed devil
I can push my wagon and pull it.



[Edited on September 9, 2008 at 3:09 PM. Reason : niiiiiiiice]

9/9/2008 3:07:49 PM

I have family in Birmingham...

Also, this guy is awesome.

9/9/2008 3:09:10 PM

9/9/2008 3:10:04 PM

Quote :

"I seen people get killed, but I never walked up on one that was already dead... It was a jar to the soul."

9/9/2008 3:16:19 PM

Who all seen tha leprechaun say Yeahhh!

9/9/2008 3:18:57 PM

I can't tell what this guy's trademark motto should be. He has so many.

Like Bubb Rubb has "The whistle goes wooo-woooo"

and the Flea Market guy has "It's just like a mini-mall"

I think "it was a jar to the soul" would be a good one though.

9/9/2008 3:19:12 PM

^

Quote :

"I went to the left, I went to the right"

Speaking of flea market guy...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJ3oHpup-pk


[Edited on September 9, 2008 at 3:21 PM. Reason : .]

9/9/2008 3:20:08 PM

Quote :

"Who all seen tha leprechaun say Yeahhh!"

Hahaha that only happened a few hundred miles of said homicide event. Alabama is such a diverse state of internet hilarity.

9/9/2008 3:34:24 PM

[Edited on September 9, 2008 at 4:00 PM. Reason : ]

9/9/2008 3:59:42 PM

wtf is this

http://rubechat.kfan.com/forums/thread/3400630.aspx

9/9/2008 5:47:51 PM

homicides do be gettin funny these days.

9/9/2008 5:49:11 PM

^^

Quote :

"7 hours, 40 minutes ago"

Looks like some chump found this thread somehow and decided to copy/paste my entire first post rather than just the link.

9/9/2008 7:30:48 PM

This thread is chock full of lols.

9/19/2008 12:58:06 AM

i watch this guy probably once/day.

fucking ridiculous and hilarious.

9/19/2008 12:58:55 AM