inspired by str8bacadil and ronnys posts

Quote :

"this kid was trying to give me a shoe weggie one time under the lunch table i kicked him in the head and he laid out on the floor everyone laughed about it immediately"

ronnys was about a pencil that stuck in him

one time in 4th grade we were taking a test and i bent over in my chair to tie my shoe and cut a huge fart on accident

in the 3rd and 5th grades i stapled my finger on accident

in 7th grade i jerked off in the principals bathroom

11/21/2008 11:28:36 AM

first

11/21/2008 11:29:28 AM

traitor

11/21/2008 11:30:31 AM

I use to always wear sweatpants in 6 grade and do baseball slides down all the hallways

The teachers use to lock their doors 3 minutes after the bell rung so if you were later than that to class you had to go to ISS

Well, once I was cutting it really close and I started sprinting toward my science class when I saw the door start to close

So I dove into my slide jammed my foot in before the door had completely shut

The door flew back into my teachers face and busted up her nose real good

I apologized but still got detention for 2 days

~

11/21/2008 11:32:13 AM

haha thats so bs...you'd probably get sued or something for that

11/21/2008 11:32:56 AM

one time in second grade i had to go take a dump during recess and there wasn't any toilet paper in the stalls so i took off my underwear to wipe my ass. I just left them there in the toilet and rocked commando for the rest of the day. it was awesome!

11/21/2008 11:32:57 AM

nah lol...when you're 11 you can get away with murder

11/21/2008 11:33:35 AM

this thread is quality

11/21/2008 11:34:31 AM

^

add to my topics

[Edited on November 21, 2008 at 11:40 AM. Reason : sd]

11/21/2008 11:40:19 AM

^

11/21/2008 11:41:49 AM

I think it was in 7th Grade. We were having field day and i was the anchor on our tug of war team. So the rope was tied around my waste.

Well basically my team was weak as hell because as soon as the whislte blew my whole team lunged foward and let go of the rope. And the other team didnt stop pulling!

So i fell down and was dragged down the football field which resulted in my shorts being dragged off of my azz in front of the whole school.

Ahhhh the memories

11/21/2008 11:44:40 AM

also once in 4th grade

It was when My brother and Me was the hottest show on TV

and it was filmed in Charlotte, so hella badass

Anyway this kid wouldn't let me copy his homework so I pushed him

and he came back at me like he wanted to fight

and I was that kid in that show like "hit ME...hit ME...hit ME "

It was so cool and everyone cheered like "FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT"

but the other kid ran and narc'd on me so later on the bus that day we put gum in his hair

11/21/2008 11:45:00 AM

Quote :

"I think it was in 7th Grade. We were having field day and i was the anchor on our tug of war team. So the rope was tied around my waste. "

didn't even need to read the rest before i busted out laughing. You know the ending right there

11/21/2008 11:46:25 AM

LoL Ya pretty much

11/21/2008 11:48:19 AM

i got three days of outofschool for calling a kid gay and not being remorseful. true story.

11/21/2008 11:48:56 AM

I loved the lame ass punishment systems you had back in grammar school

We had tacks one year

You had 4 of them by your name...everytime you fucked up they took one down

The most badass kid in our grade was named David McLean

He used to get at least two tacks pulled every day

One time he got three tacks pulled, so one more meant he had to go to the office

The teacher warned him, and he got up, took down his last tack, and stabbed this fat girl named Destiny with it

then he flicked off the teacher and peaced

Ultimate badass

11/21/2008 11:52:03 AM

can i add stories from my high school students

11/21/2008 11:52:10 AM

no

11/21/2008 11:53:48 AM

, them

11/21/2008 11:55:46 AM

ok then, maybe that will be my next thread

11/21/2008 11:56:05 AM

in 9th grade this fat retarded girl named sharice stabbed this other retarded guy keith (keef) in the head with a fork at lunch. It was probably the coolest thing ever.



thinking back i have some great stories from growing up. almost makes me wish i kept a journal even though that would have been a little ~.


[Edited on November 21, 2008 at 12:01 PM. Reason : add]

11/21/2008 11:59:42 AM

9th grade PE 1 in highschool we were waiting for the bell to go to lunch so everyone had on a bookbag. Well, a buddy of mine did and open chest or circle game to some kid and then ran off in a large circle strafe motion laughing, and making a goofy face. He slipped in some water on the floor from a leaky air duct and slid into a full trashcan and it fell on top of him and was just like wtf happened?! What sucked is that only like 5 out of the 40 people there saw it. It did come back in the senior memories during graduation. "Remember when Matt N. slid into the trash can in the gym."

11/21/2008 12:00:27 PM

I got a whole gang of stories, but the rest of yall feel free to chime in



Ok so that same kid David McLean, his special talent was that he could line drive piss from like 20 feet away


Like hard as hell velocity right into the pisser, so that it misted like 6 feet away


He could also arc it hella high so that he could actually piss over the stall onto someone who was taking a dook

once I was dropping bombs and I heard him come in because he was singing bone thugs

So i pulled my pants up real quick and busted out of the stall just as he began to piss over it

he saw me and was like 'o dag' but I tackled him and we both got covered in his piss

kinda gross, but we lol'd and changed into our gym clothes for the rest of the day

11/21/2008 12:01:04 PM

Quote :

"One time he got three tacks pulled, so one more meant he had to go to the office The teacher warned him, and he got up, took down his last tack, and stabbed this fat girl named Destiny with it then he flicked off the teacher and peaced Ultimate badass"

hahahaha

11/21/2008 12:01:09 PM

1st grade: Saw my 1st Vagina, 70ish year old teacher named Mrs. Hanninen. It was like someone stuffed a stocking with all the roast beef from the local deli

6th grade: Placed a fake pile of poo amidst all the deli sandwiches on the table in the lunch room. Teacher / staff flipped out, taped it up in an envelope and made me hand deliver to principal....who I told 'Mr. Hammock asked me to give this to you'

6th grade: Threw a muffin from the drainage ditch that exploded on the windshield of a huge redneck

11/21/2008 12:19:02 PM

man, I've got way too many stories from high school, me and my friends should have a movie made about us

11/21/2008 12:20:43 PM

I made my Spanish teacher cry by constantly calling her a fat pig.
I wrote hate messages in blood in my English teachers classroom.
I beat up a gay immigrant.
I hid xacto blades in the tips of my boots for brawls.
Had the cops escort me out of a class for attacking a teacher.


It was a lot easier to get away with hate crimes back then.

11/21/2008 12:30:05 PM

I used to get picked on at a private school that I attended. I was having a really bad day which culminated when somebody knocked my clarinet out of its case and I had this look of murder in my face. After the guy came back from the hospital, he apologized, and I was never picked on again.

11/21/2008 12:30:39 PM

Nice thread dnl

11/21/2008 12:31:07 PM

we were at soccer practice in 10th or 11th grade and the field was right next to a gravel parking lot and the tennis courts. the girls tennis team was practicing and we were kinda goofing off on the field.

next thing i know some jackass in a jeep goes sliding around in the parking lot trying to show off and goes flying into the fence around the tennis courts. he knocked down a whole side of the fence, but just threw it in reverse and drove off.

he was a dumbass though since everyone saw who it was. he came back later once the police were there. i bet the tennis team shit bricks.

11/21/2008 12:34:12 PM

I once ran away from school and walked to DC.

11/21/2008 12:34:22 PM

Quote :

"I made my Spanish teacher cry by constantly calling her a fat pig. I wrote hate messages in blood in my English teachers classroom. I beat up a gay immigrant. I hid xacto blades in the tips of my boots for brawls. Had the cops escort me out of a class for attacking a teacher."

11/21/2008 12:38:20 PM

Quote :

"man, I've got way too many stories from high school, me and my friends should have a movie made about us"

that's kind of the way we were too. same group of kids for almost 15 years. We are actually all getting together at my buddy's lake house in 3 weeks for a weekend retreat type deal. I'm sure we will rehash a lot of shit.

11/21/2008 12:43:22 PM

In HS, some girl gave birth at the end of the day in the main hall. That was messed up.



[Edited on November 21, 2008 at 12:50 PM. Reason : ...]

11/21/2008 12:49:28 PM

^

My brother once called his German teacher a Nazi and as he was being escorted to detention, he threw his arm in SS fashion and said, "Heil, Hitler!"

11/21/2008 12:51:35 PM

lawlz

11/21/2008 12:53:20 PM

in highschool, i think i was a freshman i was walking out to the parking lot after school to go home and this guy got in his car and cranked it up and he had all of this windows up and when his bass hit, it hit so loud that it shattered all of the windows in his car. It was priceless

sumfoo1 should remember that one too.

11/21/2008 1:06:30 PM

Quote :

"we were at soccer practice in 10th or 11th grade and the field was right next to a gravel parking lot and the tennis courts. the girls tennis team was practicing and we were kinda goofing off on the field. next thing i know some jackass in a jeep goes sliding around in the parking lot trying to show off and goes flying into the fence around the tennis courts."

shit, had to look at your profile to make sure you wernt from my school. during cross country one of my friends stole my jeep and was doing burnouts in the gravel parking lot, throwing rocks over all the girls tennis teams cars, of course i was the one to get in trouble because everyone knew what my jeep looked like but didnt know that someone else was drivin it

11/21/2008 1:07:01 PM

^^ That's awesome.

11/21/2008 1:07:57 PM

^^^ hahahahha

^^

[Edited on November 21, 2008 at 1:08 PM. Reason : f]

11/21/2008 1:08:25 PM

in 3rd grade we were at recess and saw this kid get his finger ripped off playing tetherball

after that there were just poles where the tetherballs used to be

11/21/2008 1:42:37 PM

Lots of parking lot/car stuff from HS...

We had a dude who managed to roll his Montero in the parking lot. He was evidently in a hurry to leave one day, got in his car and gunned it at the end of the row, toward the other end of the row someone backed out without looking into his path; he swerved around them, overcorrected into a muddy patch of grass, and ended up rolling. So almost the entire school saw him standing next to his upside-down Montero, talking to the school resource officer, as we were leaving. Priceless.

My car at the time, my old '79 Malibu, had a pretty serious oil leak from one of the head gaskets that dripped down onto the exhaust manifold and would smoke, and would continue to do so after I parked the car. I had at least 15 people ask me if my car was on fire, because there would be smoke drifting up from under the hood as I would walk away from it. A friend of mine had an '82 BMW 320 of similar crappiness; one day he pulled into his parking space and stopped, but one of his headlights continued moving forward, fell out of its socket onto the ground, and shattered right there. He could also do the trick, quite unintentionally, where he would attempt to turn the car off and remove the key, and it would keep running despite the fact that the key was no longer in the ignition. Quality german engineering.


[Edited on November 21, 2008 at 1:45 PM. Reason : s]

11/21/2008 1:44:10 PM

one time in 7th grade, during lunch, i choked on a corn dog (like literally...probably should have had the heimlich done). after about a minute of freaking out, i finally puked it out all over some black kid. it was a terrifying incedent that endend rather humorously.

i haven't had a corn dog since.

11/21/2008 1:50:24 PM

i'm not going to lie

i was hot stuff in elementary and middle school. WHOA my clothes were cool.

11/21/2008 2:00:13 PM

I ate a bad pizza Lunchable right before last period in middle school, but figured I could ride out the nausea for my last class of the day

Well, my last class was sex ed, and it turned out to be the day they showed you graphic pictures of people having sex and nasty things like genital warts.

I couldn't hold it in and barfed all over my desk and the floor right in the middle of the video.

11/21/2008 2:06:14 PM

ahaha

11/21/2008 2:07:14 PM

i could post a yearbook picture but i'm not going to. the hotness would blow everyone away

11/21/2008 2:08:33 PM

remember that video they showed with the woman giving birth? what was it??

11/21/2008 2:09:15 PM

wonder why my school never showed the cool shit like that

11/21/2008 2:11:40 PM

when i was in 5th grade, these boys were taunting me while i was eating my lunch. i told them to "lick my asshole" and my teacher heard me from the parking lot. my principal called my mom and i got in huge trouble.

11/21/2008 2:11:59 PM