puppy ordered a box of citrus fruits from Florida and this guy was at the bottom of the box. Is he some kind of killer tropical spider???










[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:29 PM. Reason : the pencil in the 3rd pic is for size comparison.]

2/3/2009 10:28:42 PM

I FUCKING HATE SPIDERS. WHY DID I CLICK THIS THREAD?

2/3/2009 10:29:12 PM

for a second i thought there was a garter snake in there with it

turrists!



and dude, how can you only use a 5-6" bic mechanical pencil as a touching tool

i'd at least need like a yard stick to poke that thing

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:30 PM. Reason : ]

2/3/2009 10:29:17 PM

KILL IT WITH FIRE!

2/3/2009 10:29:17 PM

KILL FIRE WITH IT!

2/3/2009 10:29:43 PM

Why do I torture myself like this....

2/3/2009 10:30:05 PM

you could sue someone for that, probably

2/3/2009 10:30:36 PM

entree:
fried hugeass spider w/ a splash of orange?


that thing is humongous

2/3/2009 10:30:51 PM

LOOK OUT

IT LAID SPIDER EGGS IN THE CITRUS FRUITS

HUGE FUCKING EGGS

IN THE FUCKING FRUIT

2/3/2009 10:31:13 PM

2/3/2009 10:31:27 PM

that spider is native to south florida. it's commonly known as the "I'M GOING TO RAPE YOU IN YOUR SLEEP, AND MURDER YOU' spider.

2/3/2009 10:31:50 PM

what the fuck are those 2 things coming from the front of its head

i know fangs dont have hair

2/3/2009 10:32:00 PM

^^ made me laugh

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:32 PM. Reason : ]

2/3/2009 10:32:26 PM

they are palps

2/3/2009 10:32:28 PM

that thing has 10 fuckin legs

2/3/2009 10:32:51 PM

It's the shits that it uses to draw you into its mouth...

Shit stuns you with dat 190% spider venom, then pulls your ass into its gaping goddamn maw with them shits.

2/3/2009 10:33:30 PM

those aren't oranges

2/3/2009 10:33:52 PM

Quote :

"190 PERCENT VENOM"

2/3/2009 10:34:22 PM

^^?

2/3/2009 10:35:00 PM

its not even that large a spider

2/3/2009 10:37:01 PM

Quote :

"what the fuck are those 2 things coming from the front of its head i know fangs dont have hair"

2/3/2009 10:37:30 PM

but it is that large of a fruit hitch-hiker

2/3/2009 10:37:31 PM

he is large enough to leave behind some pubes in that first picture

2/3/2009 10:37:52 PM

Quote :

"KILL IT WITH FIRE"

2/3/2009 10:38:10 PM

paging Kitty B

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:38 PM. Reason : space]

2/3/2009 10:38:36 PM

BUT REALLY THOUGH...

SERIOUSLY, GUYS...

It laid eggs in the citrus fruit.

2/3/2009 10:38:47 PM

hahaha, ok

I actually laughed at the spider pubes

2/3/2009 10:39:01 PM

If that had happened to me, I would either A) not be able to sleep in my house for at least 2 days or B) have nightmares. I may have nightmares just thinking about it. As for identifying it, maybe e-mail the pictures to an entomology professor, such as Dr. Meyer.
john_meyer@ncsu.edu

2/3/2009 10:39:58 PM

ok it's not that huge.

I was expecting to see something like in a kittyB thread.

Also, fire has proven to be an unreliable killer of bugs, except that time I torched a whole yellow jacket nest with gasoline in retaliation for being stung a dozen times while mowing.

2/3/2009 10:41:19 PM

SO TUFF

2/3/2009 10:41:39 PM

I'm not even kidding, that fucker egged the goddamn citrus.


^^You should try dumping two buckets of water into one, they get pissed. And you've run away by then of course.

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:45 PM. Reason : .]

2/3/2009 10:44:50 PM

So we are sure it is not a brown recluse? It looks kind of similar.

2/3/2009 10:45:10 PM

its not a BR

2/3/2009 10:46:12 PM

2/3/2009 10:46:15 PM

2/3/2009 10:47:02 PM

No it doesn't.

2/3/2009 10:47:11 PM

hell yes john goodman

2/3/2009 10:47:39 PM

i'm going to need to see a pic of your hand next to it so i can get a sense of scale. how do i know you didn't just zoom in on a tiny little spider?

2/3/2009 10:48:33 PM

^can you not see the mechanical pencil

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:49 PM. Reason : h]

2/3/2009 10:48:48 PM

2/3/2009 10:49:03 PM

Scorpions don't count.

But really, screen your citrus fruits for spider eggs before you eat them. Otherwise you get some of that Alien movie shit busting out.

2/3/2009 10:50:19 PM

when my father was working in Crystal River, FL we lived with him at an RV park. Those bastards were all over the campground. We had the first lot next to the rec hall which had showers (my family was the only one to use the showers) and those things would creep in around the corner of the shower stall and watch you. Fucking perverts. The worst was when we left the trailer empty for about 8 months, came back, and about 500 hundred of those things had taken refuge inside. The only time I think I have ever been scared of a spider...

2/3/2009 10:50:46 PM

Quote :

"Scorpions don't count."

lol. i know. still creeeeeeeeeepy.

2/3/2009 10:51:49 PM

Places to Never Go:
Crystal River, FL

2/3/2009 10:52:07 PM

wait thats a pencil?

shit thats not a big spider

lol

i honestly thought this thing was fist sized and kept wondering what kind of tool that was....

2/3/2009 10:52:23 PM

those arent scorpions they are sun-spiders

2/3/2009 10:53:14 PM

There weren't any eggs in the fruit
No, its not really a big spider.

[Edited on February 3, 2009 at 10:54 PM. Reason : but if I did eat spider eggs, what would happen?]

2/3/2009 10:53:27 PM

Quote :

"wait thats a pencil? shit thats not a big spider lol i honestly thought this thing was fist sized and kept wondering what kind of tool that was...."

2/3/2009 10:54:46 PM

Quote :

"^can you not see the mechanical pencil"

that's a pencil? this doesn't qualify as a HUGE ASS SPIDER for sure

2/3/2009 10:56:21 PM

Quote :

"but if I did eat spider eggs, what would happen"

they'd get fucked up in your shit

2/3/2009 10:57:51 PM