User not logged in - login - register
Home Calendar Books School Tool Photo Gallery Message Boards Users Statistics Advertise Site Info
go to bottom | |
 Message Boards » » Married Life Woes Page 1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7, Prev Next  
FuhCtious
All American
11955 Posts
user info
edit post

^^What about the idea of each of you handling the things you do best. Like, I know you aren't a fan of cooking, but do you like it better than housework or other chores? If you cooked more but in exchange got to sit on your butt and play video games and she made up the slack by doing other chores, is that doable?

10/16/2013 2:26:29 PM

jbrick83
All American
23066 Posts
user info
edit post

^ Sounds nice...but it seems like he still gets home late three or four days out of the week. I know everyone's schedule is different, but my fiancee and I like to start cooking around 6 pm...dinner at 7...eat and watch some TV until 9ish...and then to bed. If he's not getting home til 7:30pm...that would mess that schedule up pretty bad.

If she's been home for a couple hours while he's working into the evening, then she should be working on getting some food on the table. That being said...he should be picking up on the chores as well.

10/16/2013 2:53:20 PM

lewoods
All American
3526 Posts
user info
edit post

Sounds like she's quit cooking because she's tired of having to cook and clean up after you.

10/16/2013 6:05:36 PM

wolfpack2105
All American
11779 Posts
user info
edit post

^lol, that could be it.

No, she isn't a shitty cook. She THINKS she is because she doesn't have alot of experience doing it. However, everything she has made before I have enjoyed and I have made sure I express that I have enjoyed it.

I am working through my issues of helping around the house and have been doing better lately. I work shift work and am on night shift right now, therefore the cooking thing isn't really an issue. The nights I'm off, I cook so that theres a meal when she gets home. The nights I work, I make something before I go in so that I have lunch at work. At that point I'll either make some for her for that night as well, or if I just make myself a sandwich or something, I let her know early so that she can make plans to fend for herself that night.

I do expect we will begin having conversations about this more come November when I switch back to day shift though. I think we're both damned lazy though and we just need to NOT be lazy. That would help out all of our issues a ton. hahaha

10/18/2013 2:09:40 AM

aimorris
All American
14715 Posts
user info
edit post

That would be frustrating. It sounds like you're making an honest effort and I would expect the same from her to cook for you when you're late.

My wife loves looking for new recipes and cooking every meal so I have it pretty easy in that area. If she's going to be late or has something to do, she always thinks of something easy I can make myself or plans to have leftovers from the previous night. To compensate for all her cooking, I do the dishes every night. It's not the same amount of work but she actually enjoys the cooking so it's not the same as a chore.

My biggest problem right now (we're into year 4) is that we spend so much time together daily in a routine (cook dinner/talk about our days, Jeopardy at 7, dishes, walk dog, TV shows we watch together, Netflix) that any time I want to do something else, she takes it personally. Like if I skip one of our TV shows we watch together to play a video game or watch a sporting event, she gets in a bad mood. I feel like the only way to stop this is for us to spend more time apart with friends but over the years the number of friends we have has dwindled plus we're both pretty lazy and usually prefer to find something to do at home.

10/18/2013 8:46:20 AM

disco_stu
All American
7436 Posts
user info
edit post

Lower expectations, be happy.

10/18/2013 10:23:47 AM

richthofen
All American
15747 Posts
user info
edit post

My wife (married 5 months though we've been together over 6 years) used to cook. And she's damn good at it. Then she started grad school and is pretty much slammed with work during most of her waking hours. So I'm responsible for pretty much all the cooking now, and for cleaning up/keeping the kitchen clean as well. I'm an ok cook, so I'm good with this plus being the momentary sole income since, once she finishes, she will be making significantly more money than I do and that will be very good for our desired lifestyle.

What bugs me is that she still demands that the kitchen be clean to her standards even though I'm doing the cleaning. Now, I'm naturally lazy--I'll do things like leave clean dishes in the dishwasher and not unload them until some dishes have accumulated in the sink that I need to move over there. Dishes in the sink drive her nuts. This results in not-infrequent fights.

I know I basically need to stop being lazy since it's good for the house to stay clean and she's a lot calmer when it is, and that I probably didn't pull my weight when we were both working (I was responsible for cleaning up after meals but she did most of the cooking and most of the cleaning of the rest of the house). But lazy is a hard habit to break, man.

10/18/2013 10:34:08 AM

Doss2k
All American
18319 Posts
user info
edit post

I guess we are just more laid back, if neither of us want to cook anything we are just as happy both eating a bowl of cereal and watching football haha

To be fair I do try to cook at least once or twice a week when I know she will be busy. I get off work at 4 and she gets off around 6 or so. Some days I go home and am lazy, but I have been lucky enough that she knows other days I feel motivated and knock a bunch of stuff out so even if it seems like I am being a lazy asshole for a few days eventually I will get it done haha.

[Edited on October 18, 2013 at 3:15 PM. Reason : .]

10/18/2013 3:06:47 PM

Smath74
All American
93078 Posts
user info
edit post

my wife always wants to watch the football game or the race on the weekends, even when i'm trying to watch Titanic

10/18/2013 3:51:05 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
user info
edit post

i told my husband last night that i thought the "hall pass" concept was interesting.

he may have taken it the wrong way?

10/19/2013 8:52:44 AM

Wraith
All American
26013 Posts
user info
edit post

^A lot more interesting for a girl since if she is even halfway decent looking she can get laid just about any time she wants.

10/19/2013 2:25:28 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

Went on my honeymoon this past week

Put 2,200 miles on the car (to Orlando, then Miami, back to Orlando, Cocoa Beach, then Port Canaveral for a cruise, then back to NC).

My wife did not drive at all. Not even 1 mile Not only that, she slept most of the way back and kept turning off the air conditioner in her sleep.

10/20/2013 6:49:57 PM

Kiwi
All American
38510 Posts
user info
edit post

Damn, I wish my bf would let me drive on road trips but he says he gets "carsick" if he doesn't drive. Luckily, he doesn't get upset if I doze off.

10/20/2013 7:58:04 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
user info
edit post

^^^ that would not be me.

10/20/2013 8:02:41 PM

Smath74
All American
93078 Posts
user info
edit post

^^my wife says the same thing. probably because i swerve a lot and don't slow down enough for turns.

10/20/2013 8:20:38 PM

elise
mainly potato
13038 Posts
user info
edit post

My husband drives pretty much everywhere and says he prefers it. And I always ask before I fall asleep. Most of the time he doesnt care, but sometimes if he is tired he wants company.

10/20/2013 8:21:12 PM

synapse
play so hard
53834 Posts
user info
edit post

Good god that's a lot of driving...did you listen to podcasts or what?

10/20/2013 8:35:42 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

On the way to Orlando I Just listened to whatever random music stations I could pick up along the way until I got tired of listening to the same top 40's songs over and over. Then listened to random talk radio and news stuff on AM. On the way back I just left the radio off the entire time. The stereo is messed up in my car (speakers randomly cut off and on) and wasn't working at all on the way back.

I don't mind driving, but getting up at 5:30 am and driving in silence for hours and hours on end is rough.

10/20/2013 9:52:56 PM

synapse
play so hard
53834 Posts
user info
edit post

Damn those are brutal conditions for that much driving.

10/20/2013 9:55:21 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

Looked at the trip counter before I went to work. The total tally was 2198 miles for the trip, so my estimate was pretty close. Then I looked at my online credit card statement and stopped caring about the driving. My parents paid for our cruise and our suite in Kissimmee (right outside Orlando), but we still managed to spend nearly $3k in 10 days.

At least we had fun!

10/21/2013 2:17:00 PM

Str8BacardiL
************
41204 Posts
user info
edit post

Income taxes off two incomes fucking SUUUUUCKS

10/21/2013 3:15:33 PM

darkone
(\/) (;,,,;) (\/)
10770 Posts
user info
edit post

^ But two incomes!?!

10/21/2013 6:16:46 PM

David0603
All American
12595 Posts
user info
edit post

Sounds like a post for the fwp thread.

10/21/2013 7:16:49 PM

Wraith
All American
26013 Posts
user info
edit post

I recently convinced my wife that she was not in fact a child and is capable of driving on road trips. Now we split the time which pleases me. Of course it probably helped that every time I drove on a road trip she'd fall asleep with her mouth wide open so I'd always take a picture of her and send it to whoever we were going to visit.

[Edited on October 23, 2013 at 10:30 AM. Reason : ]

10/23/2013 10:29:47 AM

NCSUam0s
All American Tease
2230 Posts
user info
edit post

Depending on which vehicle we take, I love driving and prefer if my husband sleeps.

10/23/2013 1:21:57 PM

Smath74
All American
93078 Posts
user info
edit post

Me "hey wife, buy some peanut butter and OJ while you are at the store"

Wife "ok"

I go to make my lunch sandwich and have a glass of OJ this morning...

chunky peanut butter and pulp free OJ
(everyone knows peanut butter should be smooth and OJ should be pulp-heavy)

10/23/2013 1:44:31 PM

disco_stu
All American
7436 Posts
user info
edit post

A)Your wife isn't a mind reader.
B)"peanut butter should be smooth". DIE HERETIC!

With you on the pulp issue though and I know you're being silly, but I fuck up my wife's grocery list all the time with things "I should have known" that would have taken her 2 seconds to write.

10/23/2013 2:04:48 PM

Str8BacardiL
************
41204 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"Me "hey wife, buy some peanut butter and OJ while you are at the store"

Wife "ok"

I go to make my lunch sandwich and have a glass of OJ this morning...

chunky peanut butter and pulp free OJ
(everyone knows peanut butter should be smooth and OJ should be pulp-heavy)"



DIVORCE!!!! or take her to a Muslim country and beat her.

10/23/2013 2:11:34 PM

elise
mainly potato
13038 Posts
user info
edit post

Smooth peanut butter and pulp free OJ forever!

10/23/2013 2:40:54 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

Peanut butter should have the consistency of wet gravel. OJ should have as much pulp as possible while still being able to flow sufficiently for drinking.

10/23/2013 3:17:55 PM

Wadhead1
Duke is puke
20897 Posts
user info
edit post

You guys are insane if you like crunchy over creamy.

10/23/2013 4:05:33 PM

lewoods
All American
3526 Posts
user info
edit post

Smooth sunbutter and super pulpy OJ are my preference, but I know he prefers creamy PB and no pulp OJ.

10/23/2013 4:30:05 PM

gunzz
IS NÚMERO UNO
68203 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"You guys are insane if you like crunchy over creamy."

10/23/2013 4:39:38 PM

EMCE
balls deep
87963 Posts
user info
edit post

gunzz, you and I can never be together

10/23/2013 6:10:30 PM

ncsuapex
SpaceForRent
37504 Posts
user info
edit post

I like to drink my OJ not chew it. Pulp is for poor people.

10/23/2013 7:32:44 PM

sumfoo1
G.S. 20-63(d)
40964 Posts
user info
edit post

I like my oj with typical pulp, i like pulp but I don't want the leftovers from the pulp less people.

I only do creamy peanut butter.

10/23/2013 9:08:54 PM

elise
mainly potato
13038 Posts
user info
edit post

We keep both kinds of peanut butter in the pantry, because he doesn't know anything about peanut butter. I constantly buy the wrong OJ, because I used to buy the one with the blue cap but he buys the one with the orange cap. Both pulpless, but there is added something or other in one. It doesn't end his world but he always mentions it.

The one thing he can not purchase without messing up is my shampoo and conditioner. Pregnancy has given me a flaky scalp, and I use head and shoulders now. Separate shampoo and conditioner. If he buys it he always comes home with 2 in 1.

10/23/2013 10:25:55 PM

CaelNCSU
All American
6079 Posts
user info
edit post

Since I've been married when I travel, the hotels I stay in automatically have my toothbrush, tooth paste, shampoo, and other toiletries. It's really amazing how that happens.

Quote :
"Put 2,200 miles on the car (to Orlando, then Miami, back to Orlando, Cocoa Beach, then Port Canaveral for a cruise, then back to NC)."


I've driven CA -> Utah -> Nevada -> CA about 6 times this year and my wife has only driven once, for 2 hours, in the hero slot on the way home. I never mind it for some reason.

Quote :
"I like to drink my OJ not chew it. Pulp is for poor people.
"


I was going to say buying boxed juice is for poor people. What kind of savages don't drink fresh squeezed? What is this, prison?

[Edited on October 24, 2013 at 11:35 AM. Reason : a]

10/24/2013 11:35:29 AM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

I just buy frozen concentrated orange juice on the commodities exchange by the ton from Randolph and Mortimer and eat it with Billy Ray Valentine.

10/24/2013 2:17:26 PM

StillFuchsia
All American
18941 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"The one thing he can not purchase without messing up is my shampoo and conditioner. Pregnancy has given me a flaky scalp, and I use head and shoulders now. Separate shampoo and conditioner. If he buys it he always comes home with 2 in 1."


It would help if Head & Shoulders designed their packaging differently for 2 in 1 vs regular shampoo, but the bottles are nearly identical

even I've accidentally bought the wrong one for myself

also, lots of dudes admitting to not pulling their own weight in this thread

it wouldn't kill y'all to stop by the Teeter sometime: that way you'd get the correct peanut butter and OJ

10/27/2013 9:31:53 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16848 Posts
user info
edit post

My wife works right next door to the grocery store. If we need something, 99% of the time she gets it on her way home from work. I mean if we need something and she's already home and it can't wait, yeah I'll go, but otherwise she's got it pretty much covered.

10/30/2013 10:59:12 PM

Smath74
All American
93078 Posts
user info
edit post

eh, my wife does the shopping because that's women's work.

10/30/2013 11:03:55 PM

elise
mainly potato
13038 Posts
user info
edit post

3^ so true.

10/31/2013 7:36:16 AM

y0willy0
All American
7863 Posts
user info
edit post

I just got engaged.

[Edited on October 31, 2013 at 11:47 AM. Reason : lol, right place to announce?]

10/31/2013 11:46:53 AM

jimmypop
All American
1401 Posts
user info
edit post

I do the shopping and laundry. My wife calls me her house hubby.

10/31/2013 12:47:29 PM

Wadhead1
Duke is puke
20897 Posts
user info
edit post

I do groceries. We each do our own laundry. I clean the kitchen for the most part. She does all the rest of the condo cleaning. I'm quite happy with this set up because I hate cleaning.

10/31/2013 1:14:08 PM

roguewarrior
All American
10830 Posts
user info
edit post

She does laundry and cooks, I do dishes and sweep floors. We usually shop together, but sometimes she does it herself. Everything else gets split or done piecemeal...the system works well enough.

11/1/2013 9:48:44 AM

Smath74
All American
93078 Posts
user info
edit post

Wife made sausage balls (and I love her balls)


"You can't eat those they are for work!"

12/14/2013 3:38:14 PM

disco_stu
All American
7436 Posts
user info
edit post



Exact same here.

12/16/2013 12:52:57 PM

shoot
All American
5729 Posts
user info
edit post

How about an important topic: sex?
Haven't had sex for a long time because of birth of our children till last month.

12/16/2013 2:40:09 PM

 Message Boards » Old School » Married Life Woes Page 1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7, Prev Next  
go to top | |
Admin Options : move topic | lock topic

© 2017 by The Wolf Web - All Rights Reserved.
The material located at this site is not endorsed, sponsored or provided by or on behalf of North Carolina State University.
Powered by CrazyWeb v2.37 - our disclaimer.