and bitchy?

Here's the situation: I live in a residential neighborhood (ie not near campus with a bunch of college kids). Every couple months my neighbors decide to have a party which involves them playing music incredibly loud (loud enough i can hear it clearly in my house). Now, I have no problem with this occurring during a reasonable time; however, it often goes until 2am or 3am which I find unacceptable. I like to be able to sleep without needing to plug my ears. I feel like after midnight, they should be turning it down. I am particularly annoyed with them tonight as they are also setting off fireworks which is causing my 2 dogs and 4 cats to go nuts....

For those of you who live in a residential area, what time do you think is acceptable to be playing music loudly?

5/31/2010 12:59:24 AM

It's Memorial Day weekend, just suck it up

5/31/2010 1:02:49 AM

i'm too old for that shit; if it's after 11, i'm calling the cops

5/31/2010 1:04:13 AM

Quote :

"i'm too old for that shit; if it's after 11, i'm calling the cops"

5/31/2010 1:06:50 AM

Why don't you just go over there like an adult and ask them to turn it down?


Calling the cops without talking to them first is a straight-up bitch move.

5/31/2010 1:13:59 AM

actually, playing loud-ass music at 3am is the bitch move and i'm not getting off my ass to go ask you not to do something you know you shouldn't be doing in the first goddamn place

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 1:17 AM. Reason : sp]

5/31/2010 1:16:57 AM

Quote :

"i'm too old for that shit; if it's after 11, i'm calling the cops"

^+2

5/31/2010 1:26:17 AM

i'm too old for that shit; if it's after 11, i'm calling the cops

5/31/2010 1:30:36 AM

Bunch of soft-ass non-confrontational no-balls havin motherfuckers ITT

5/31/2010 1:50:08 AM

what a bunch of old farts ITT

talk to the neighbors first and ask them to turn the music down without coming off as a dick. if they keep it up call the cops.

don't be the asshole that preemptively calls the blues.

5/31/2010 1:51:38 AM

I was gonna say you should attend the party and have fun... but this explains some shtuff:

Quote :

"2 dogs and 4 cats "

5/31/2010 1:55:50 AM

You're allowed to be annoyed and bitchy if they don't turn it down after you've asked them to turn it down.

5/31/2010 2:24:49 AM

call the fuzz

5/31/2010 2:38:29 AM

Quote :

"Why don't you just go over there like an adult and ask them to turn it down? Calling the cops without talking to them first is a straight-up bitch move."

Because I don't want to get shot, and I don't want to shoot anyone.

People who are self-centered enough, and have such little respect for others, that they disturb others late into the night are also often the kinds of people who don't take criticism well.

You will NOT hear "Oh, I'm so sorry. Time flew, and I didn't realize how late it was. We're shutting it down, now."

You will hear "What the hell is your problem, asshole?! Go be a nanny to somebody else."

And then, he and all of his hoodlum friends are quite aware of who you are, and you are more likely to be a target for his idiocy in the future.

Fuck 'em. Call the fuzz. We pay them to deal with these people. They're not going to find the responding cops at their homes and give them shit. But if I make any request of them, the same cannot be said.

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 3:04 AM. Reason : h]

5/31/2010 3:01:56 AM

Quote :

"It's Memorial Day weekend, just suck it up"

and/or

Quote :

"attend the party and have fun"

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 3:18 AM. Reason : ]

5/31/2010 3:17:30 AM

Quote :

"Because I don't want to get shot, and I don't want to shoot anyone. People who are self-centered enough, and have such little respect for others, that they disturb others late into the night are also often the kinds of people who don't take criticism well. You will NOT hear "Oh, I'm so sorry. Time flew, and I didn't realize how late it was. We're shutting it down, now." You will hear "What the hell is your problem, asshole?! Go be a nanny to somebody else." And then, he and all of his hoodlum friends are quite aware of who you are, and you are more likely to be a target for his idiocy in the future. Fuck 'em. Call the fuzz. We pay them to deal with these people. They're not going to find the responding cops at their homes and give them shit. But if I make any request of them, the same cannot be said."

Oh, so you live in the projects?


Sounds like you need to move then, homey.

5/31/2010 4:01:45 AM

TULIPlovr apparently has issues. Or maybe I've just lived a charmed life, because every time I've been asked to keep it down, I've kept it down. And every time I've asked someone else to keep it down, they have apologized and kept it down rather than shooting me.

5/31/2010 4:18:24 AM

I think it depends on the neighbors. If it were my current neighbors I'd have no problem telling them to STFU. When I lived on Kent Road though, the one time we told the girls upstairs to simmer down they proceeded later that night to spray paint my roommate's car

5/31/2010 4:46:36 AM

^Yep. You don't have to be in the projects to run into shitheads. And a very strong majority of people acting like this are.

Not to mention they're all likely pretty well dosed with at least alcohol, if not other drugs.

In any other situation, I don't think any of you would advocate trying to talk sense to drunk/high people being obnoxious. Yet, I think y'all want people not to call the cops because so many of you do this exact thing.

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 4:57 AM. Reason : l]

5/31/2010 4:55:26 AM

asking people throwing a loud party to keep it down is all well and good, but when they don't turn it down and the cops show up, guess who's car they're gonna egg?

5/31/2010 6:12:19 AM

Quote :

"Or maybe I've just lived a charmed life, because every time I've been asked to keep it down, I've kept it down. And every time I've asked someone else to keep it down, they have apologized and kept it down rather than shooting me."

QFT. Sounds like somebody doesn't have the balls to confront.

5/31/2010 6:55:59 AM

ha. normally i would ask them to turn it down first (btw, i didnt call the cops....took a sleeping pill and eventually fell asleep) however:
1) at 3am i'm in my pj's and have no desire to walk up to a party of middle aged drunk men
2) they're drunk. last summer he came to my door at 1am with a beer in one hand and a cigar in the other asking me to party (mind you i was 23 and he's got to be near 40 = creeper)

and as far as all the animals go.....2 of those cats aren't mine. they're my friend's im watching for the weekend. plus i'm a vet student, it's a requirement to have a small zoo.

5/31/2010 7:48:20 AM

^ well at least they invited you

Id talk to them during daytime hrs sometime when they aren't drunk. Maybe explain you are a vet student and have other obligations, one of which is why you live there and not in a college apartment complex.

5/31/2010 8:56:02 AM

if i was too much of a pussy to nicely ask them to quiet down, i'd just take a sleeping pill and let them have some fun before i called the cops

5/31/2010 9:25:49 AM

Leave an anonymous note:

"No noise past 11pm. This is your warning. Next time you do this, I will be calling the cops."

5/31/2010 9:36:59 AM

doesn't get much more passive-aggressive than that

5/31/2010 10:00:12 AM

Nah, it's passive-assertive. (Also, there's nothing wrong with passive-aggressiveness.)

5/31/2010 10:01:22 AM

oic

5/31/2010 10:10:12 AM

Quote :

"You will NOT hear "Oh, I'm so sorry. Time flew, and I didn't realize how late it was. We're shutting it down, now." You will hear "What the hell is your problem, asshole?! Go be a nanny to somebody else.""

lol, and how exactly do you know this? i know anytime i've been asked to quiet things down i have..and usually things got loud without me realizing it just because of the drinking and things slowly getting louder and louder and time passing more quickly than i thought. if no one is complaining, they probably have no idea they're annoying anyone. for all they know the music might not be loud enough to be heard by anyone else

hell, you could even go talk to them in the middle of the day and let them know next time you'd appreciate it if they'd keep it down after midnight or whenever. then if they do it again, by all means call the cops

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 10:14 AM. Reason : and yea, they invited you then i highly doubt they're going to be super assholes about it]

5/31/2010 10:13:46 AM

I had a set of neighbors who would do this every night Thursday-Sunday until 3 or 4 am. Loud enough the walls would vibrate. We asked them probably the first two weeks every single night to keep it down after midnight. They would turn it down a little bit, then 15 minutes later, it would be right back loud. I also feel like I shouldn't have to walk over there every single night. I should have a standing objection to loud noises consistently after midnight. Glad to be away from that place.

5/31/2010 10:41:04 AM

You guys have a fucked up perception of who is being a bitch in this situation.

The bitch in this situation is the asshole that has no regard for the neighborhood they chose to be a part of.

The 'being a bitch' cycle started when they decided to turn their shit up and be a nuisance to everyone around them.

The party throwers are the bitch here; not their neighbors.

I myself enjoy confrontation so I always chomp at the bit to tell my neighbors to shut the fuck up and keep it down. If they don't I will call the cops if its ridiculous enough.

My personal threshold for action doesn't change the fact that the ones creating the commotion are still bitches.

5/31/2010 10:45:16 AM

The Raleigh rule is if it is after 11:30, you call the cops. They have special divisions that handle noise complaints.

5/31/2010 10:49:30 AM

^^ One party, every couple of months on a weekend does not rise to the threshold of bitchy in my book. Especially if no one is actually mentioning that they're causing a disturbance or annoying anyone. In fact, the OP may be the only person in the neighborhood not attending and may be the only person annoyed.

5/31/2010 11:04:20 AM

If it's not an every night thing, and if it's on holidays and weekends, I'd say suck it up. Otherwise, ask them to turn it down, or, if you're sure they'll say no, call the 5-0.

5/31/2010 11:44:34 AM

Quote :

"2) they're drunk. last summer he came to my door at 1am with a beer in one hand and a cigar in the other asking me to party (mind you i was 23 and he's got to be near 40 = creeper)"

LOL its creepy to hang out with people that are 40? Come on dude, you're not in college anymore.

5/31/2010 11:57:32 AM

Quote :

"One party, every couple of months on a weekend does not rise to the threshold of bitchy in my book. Especially if no one is actually mentioning that they're causing a disturbance or annoying anyone. In fact, the OP may be the only person in the neighborhood not attending and may be the only person annoyed."

Exactly

if it were that loud and obnoxious in a residential area then the cops would be called by someone else as well. If they are really out there blasting music til 2 or 3AM and setting off fireworks I doubt that EVERYONE in your neighborhood is just going to sit in bed and listen to the disturbance....

5/31/2010 12:20:21 PM

Quote :

" LOL its creepy to hang out with people that are 40? Come on dude, you're not in college anymore."

yes....this guy has a reputation as being the creeper in the neighborhood. he's flirted with other neighbors teenage daughters (atleast until dad threatened to kill him...which i fully believe he would). and when you're a young single female who lives alone...it's rather uncomfortable having them show up at your door in the middle of the night.

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 12:43 PM. Reason : .]

5/31/2010 12:42:46 PM

Quote :

"They have special divisions that handle noise complaints"

made up of assholes and dickheads

5/31/2010 12:50:30 PM

Quote :

"when you're a young single female who lives alone...it's rather uncomfortable having them show up at your door in the middle of the night."

That's why you don't open your door or invest in a security latch so you only open it part way to see what they want. If you're really uncomfortable about all of this call the cops or start looking for a new place to live.

5/31/2010 12:51:30 PM

Quote :

"Every couple months"

So like what, 6 times a year? Just get over it.

5/31/2010 1:14:02 PM

Quote :

"I live in a residential neighborhood"

does this mean townhouse or single family homes? especially since your main complaint is music and not people outside screaming and yelling ... bass coming through a shared wall is much different than hearing music coming from inside your neighbors closed house. i'm not leaving my house at 2 or 3 am. ask once, at midnight. from them on, sure, call the cops.

5/31/2010 2:23:46 PM

^ single family homes. after living in a shitty apartment for 3 years, there was no way in hell i was going to buy a townhouse that shared walls with anyone.

5/31/2010 2:29:49 PM

I have parties all the time at my house and usually nobody ever says a thing.

The one time my neighbors have come over and asked us to turn it down, we hadn't realized we'd left all the windows open because it was hot inside and the music was blasting into their bedroom. We turned the music down, closed the windows, and that was it. It's not that big of a deal. In fact, now the neighbors usually stop by for a few drinks whenever we have a party now and out of respect we try to keep it down more.

People listening to music and drinking doesn't make them violent, aggressive people- it makes them fun.

Calling the cops without talking to them first is a dick thing to do. Way more of a dick thing to do than having a party in the first place.

5/31/2010 3:35:06 PM

good god.

it is a holiday weekend.

suck it up or go ask them to turn their music down.

or buy earplugs.

5/31/2010 4:34:05 PM

Quote :

"bitchy"

Never. Bitchy is never acceptable and never works. Assertive is a completely different issue.


Either way, their rights end where your property line begins. It is courteous to go tell them that you don't appreciate it eithern the night of or the morning after, but if they continue to disrespect them . . . fuc'm.



On the other hand, if you're doing the typical "woman" thing of just ignoring it and ignoring it and ignoring it etc. until it becomes such an issue that you lose control of your emotions and have to go all bitchy . . . well then it's on you.

5/31/2010 4:40:44 PM

Quote :

"It's Memorial Day weekend, just suck it up"

Agreed. My friends' neighbor came over to bitch about the noise at 12:01 last 4th of July.

Personally.,I try to have a party every couple of months in my house. I don't think my neighbors are close enough to hear the noise but they also don't seem like the type to throw a fit over something which I do a few times a year.

[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 5:08 PM. Reason : sp]

5/31/2010 5:06:12 PM

It would depend on what the neighbor is like.

Most 40 year olds that I know that still "party" don't blast music at 3am.

If he makes you feel uncomfortable then call the cops. Anyone that expects a female to go over to a house full of 40 year olds that act like they are 18 in the middle of the night is an idiot.

5/31/2010 6:07:58 PM

Play loud music at 7 or 8 am. It's memorial day weekend, they can suck it up.


[Edited on May 31, 2010 at 6:32 PM. Reason : -]

5/31/2010 6:30:06 PM

There are obviously three answers in this thread:

1. Confront them nicely: May work and everything will be fine. It also may backfire and you'll end up with an anonymous egging or car-keying.

2. Call the cops and let them do their jobs: Will pretty much work every time.

3. Do nothing and wait for the cycle to repeat itself: I guess this would work for some and not me.

Big picture here is, only one of the three methods mentioned above will work every time and (assuming you aren't the only neighbor) will keep you anonymous and out of harms way. I personally have no problems calling the cops, because like it has been said before, adults should be able to act like civilized people and respect others' boundaries.

5/31/2010 6:30:14 PM

Quote :

"My friends' neighbor came over to bitch about the noise at 12:01 last 4th of July."

Justifiably so. It doesn't really matter what day it is, when you start infringing on other peoples' private property rights it is you who up with said actions should suck.



That being said, there are adult ways around all of this . . .

5/31/2010 6:44:20 PM