Cousin's wedding. I mean, I think he's okay and everything, nothing against the guy, but some part of me is entirely disappointed that I left Raleigh for 5 days just for this shit...

-Complete disorganization in all areas
-Groom wore khaki shorts and his sleeves rolled-up during the wedding
-Reception took place at the bride's mom's tiny-ass house with a horse in the backyard
-The couple's first dance was to some slow-ish Nickelback song.
-The second dance of the night was another shitty Nickelback song.
-At some point I heard that goddamned firefly song by Owl City playing, and every girl there was singing along.
-Obviously, it was fucking hot. We were outside in Georgia.
-Speaking of heat, there were shitty (and loud) fans everywhere. Classy.
-Add that to the flies and the other bugs and it moves from classy to the height of sophistication.
-The entire night, the groom just straight up did not give a shit. He loves the girl, but when it came to the ceremony and everything, he clearly hated it. We had to keep running off to find him during the reception because he'd go wander off with a couple drinking buddies to go fucking around in the woods or something.
-Other minor annoyances that are too minor to bother mentioning specifically.


All the parents kept calling it a very "non-traditional" wedding. I, being secretly a non-Christian in an extended family full of Christians, was occasionally reminding them that it was an entirely traditional wedding, it was just lazy, half-assed, and low-budget.

Oh well. I suppose I should be glad I have first world problems to worry about.

[/twwblog]

6/14/2010 2:46:55 AM

sounds like my prom...also held in rural georgia.

[Edited on June 14, 2010 at 2:49 AM. Reason : though we might've spent more on the reception.]

6/14/2010 2:49:25 AM

congratulations on being a fucking douchebag

6/14/2010 2:49:45 AM

Quote :

"All the parents kept calling it a very "non-traditional" wedding. I, being secretly a non-Christian in an extended family full of Christians, was occasionally reminding them that it was an entirely traditional wedding, it was just lazy, half-assed, and low-budget. "

Okay, I'll admit it.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. Every "non-traditional" or "offbeat" wedding I have personally been to, it was really just a pseudonym for a wedding the couple obviously didn't give two shits about putting together. If you don't give a damn, just get married at the courthouse and have a nice dinner for your family at Caffe Luna or something. It will probably cost less and everyone will enjoy it more.

6/14/2010 2:50:57 AM

^ amen to that

6/14/2010 2:54:51 AM

Quote :

"If you don't give a damn, just get married at the courthouse and have a nice dinner for your family at Caffe Luna or something. It will probably cost less and everyone will enjoy it more."

Agreed... but unfortunately they probably would have caught a lot of shit from a lot of family members if they'd done this, or at least caused their parents to catch a lot of shit on their behalf. I'm sure a lot of the extended relatives would have complained, and my uncle (groom's father) used to be a pastor, and he's always had kind of a stick up his ass, so he probably would have personally demanded that they get married in a church before god and everyone else.

6/14/2010 3:03:16 AM

That's fine, have a simple ceremony in a church then and go out to a restaurant after.

6/14/2010 4:48:55 AM

Before I clicked, I was looking forward to a description of a nice traditional fun rustic wedding with great food in




but I was severely dissapointed.

6/14/2010 6:49:51 AM

6/14/2010 6:50:40 AM

holy shit his neck is wider than his head

DO. NOT. FUCK. WITH.

6/14/2010 6:57:39 AM

^^^
That's always bugged me.
One of them needs to change their name.

6/14/2010 6:58:59 AM

6/14/2010 7:39:21 AM

^ see now that looks like a fun cool wedding!

6/14/2010 8:46:54 AM

what a shitty wedding and cousin. should have skipped that bullshit.

6/14/2010 8:50:53 AM

whenever I want to talk shit about somebody's wedding, I just remember that mine won't be perfect either...

If some guy ever tries to marry me, he's going to have to hog tie me, drug me with roofies, and find a really cool justice of the peace that can do a ceremony while the bride is unconscious.

That's pretty nontraditional...

6/14/2010 9:11:03 AM

Men reveal themselves to be wedding snobs ITT

6/14/2010 9:18:50 AM

^ haha

6/14/2010 9:20:57 AM

Quote :

"Before I clicked, I was looking forward to a description of a nice traditional fun rustic wedding with great food in but I was severely dissapointed."

LOL. NAILED IT. 10/10

6/14/2010 9:24:40 AM

^ my thoughts exactly

6/14/2010 9:26:54 AM

went to a wedding where most of the guys (including the groom) were cops. It was totally retarded. the groom didn't take his sunglasses off the entire time (even under the tent during the first dance). And no alcohol.

You could tell by the amount of empty tables that only about half the people that were invited/rsvp'd were present.

Good cake though, so that's a +

6/14/2010 10:23:22 AM

If it's not your wedding why do you care if it's "tacky" or if it seems "half-assed"

Maybe they were just wanting to really just have a party with all their friends. You showed up because you were family and you wanted to show your support. Your cousin might show up to yours and wonder why there was so much effort put into a party for your wedding.

Some people like to get married because they get to be married to that person for the rest of their life...other people like to get married because they get to have a wedding.

6/14/2010 10:34:48 AM

I wasn't really complaining, just stating how it was, like I said, the cake was good.

6/14/2010 10:35:47 AM

My rant had more to do with the OP.

6/14/2010 10:38:20 AM

no alcohol at a wedding is pretty rough

6/14/2010 10:39:27 AM

I think the real question is why you took five days out of your life for this. There is no reason this required more than one night's stay at a Holiday Inn Express.

Show up, throw up, sleep it off, drive home.

[Edited on June 14, 2010 at 10:43 AM. Reason : l]

6/14/2010 10:43:09 AM

Quote :

"Show up, throw up, sleep it off, drive home. "

QFT

6/14/2010 10:46:01 AM

I enjoyed reading the op.

6/14/2010 10:59:12 AM

NERD GOES OUTSIDE, GETS HOT

MORE AT 11

6/14/2010 11:07:39 AM

I've been to almost this exact wedding in bumfuck rural Virginia.

6/14/2010 12:07:04 PM