While washing my hands in a public restroom, I see someone recoil in horror after attempting to enter the stall that I just shartted in.

7/22/2010 1:40:42 PM

Getting you to quit this site.

7/22/2010 1:41:40 PM

Ordering after another table and getting your food before them

7/22/2010 1:44:03 PM

Ordering after another table and getting your food before them

7/22/2010 1:44:03 PM

Double posting

7/22/2010 1:44:30 PM

low A boarding pass for a southwest flight in the morning

7/22/2010 1:44:58 PM

not capitalizing the beginning of my sentences

nor using punctuation

7/22/2010 1:45:21 PM

^^lol, that is a good one.

7/22/2010 1:45:39 PM

Getting more ore out than anyone else in a shift.

7/22/2010 2:03:58 PM

^^agreed!

7/22/2010 2:08:22 PM

there's a long line of cars in a lane and a lane that is about to end on the right

guy zooms past the line of cars to try to get in front, and you prevent the guy from getting over

7/22/2010 2:11:21 PM

Zooming past a long line of idiots and then cutting in right before my lane ends

7/22/2010 2:21:13 PM

fucking my supermodel girlfriend

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

7/22/2010 2:23:44 PM

picking up a rock and nail in one shot the bottle my cousin and uncle had been trying to hit for like 2 minutes

7/22/2010 2:25:00 PM

Every day that i wake up in good health

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

7/22/2010 2:29:08 PM

sounds more like a major victory for you

7/22/2010 2:34:37 PM

i'm a half empty kind of guy

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

7/22/2010 2:37:11 PM

getting to work before anyone else in my team

7/23/2010 7:10:43 AM

Quote :

"low A boarding pass for a southwest flight in the morning"

QFT, I got one last flight I had, the front row is everything I imagined it would be and more.

7/23/2010 8:37:40 AM

parsonsb said:

Quote :

"picking up a rock and nail in one shot the bottle my cousin and uncle had been trying to hit for like 2 minutes"

I was walking down by the boat dock with this dude in high school, right? I picked up a rock, threw it in a high arc, and came down right on top of one of the posts. Beautiful sound, beautiful bounce.

Dude says to me, "I bet you a million dollars you couldn't do that again."

One throw later, that motherfucker owes me a million dollars.

7/23/2010 8:40:47 AM

people tend to owe you a lot of money dont they

7/23/2010 8:43:25 AM

I can see why you'd say that!

Also: getting the handicapped stall in the bathroom at work.

7/23/2010 8:48:02 AM

pretending to hold the elevator by half-assedly reaching for the "open" button as someone is walking up, but then letting the door shut and riding up to your floor by yourself

another way to do this is to stand at the very back of the elevator so you are not near the buttons as someone is walking up, and then just pretend to stare down at your blackberry or whatever so you get the elevator to yourself.

[Edited on July 23, 2010 at 10:51 AM. Reason : .]

7/23/2010 10:50:27 AM

^I do this all the time. Or stand so you can't see if anyone's coming.

7/23/2010 11:26:36 AM

Getting to sit in Economy Plus, and an exit row, and having the person who is sitting in the middle seat not show up.

Almost felt like first class. Almost.

7/23/2010 11:29:10 AM

seeing someone who was riding your bumper 5 minutes earlier pulled over on the side of the road on the highway

7/23/2010 11:40:42 AM

Quote :

"^I do this all the time. Or stand so you can't see if anyone's coming."

right.

my usual spot is in the far back corner of the elevator so i cant see down the hallway in the reflections of the metal of the elevator (ours have a mirror finish on most of the surface of the doors and trim). if i felt like an asshole about it, i would be comforted by the fact that there are 7 elevators in the elevator bank of my building. but id do it if it was the only one in the building too.

7/23/2010 11:42:02 AM

solving a math problem after spending hours upon hours on it

then, the next day, talking to somebody and hearing them say they found the problem to be fairly easy

hearing them explain what they did, catching the mistake, and destroying their whole proof in ten or eleven words

petty, but satisfying

7/23/2010 11:45:49 AM

Quote :

"seeing someone who was riding your bumper 5 minutes earlier pulled over on the side of the road on the highway "

true.

7/23/2010 11:51:19 AM

Chasing God off TWW

8/3/2010 8:02:44 PM

The thread is titled "Minor Victories"

8/3/2010 8:04:14 PM

God was only a minor type of character though

8/3/2010 8:05:40 PM

Quote :

"there's a long line of cars in a lane and a lane that is about to end on the right guy zooms past the line of cars to try to get in front, and you prevent the guy from getting over"

You do realize that you're wrong, don't you? That is dangerous and probably illegal.
There's a reason the lanes are the way they are -- there's nothing wrong with him going down the lane, passing others and merging later. That's what others should be doing.

Think about it. You have to merge somewhere, either where the lane ends or somewhere further up the road. Why do it further up the road? Use the road that's there -- it's there for a reason, right? If, in the situation you described, everyone did it your way, that part of the lane would never get driven on -- so what's the point of having it? You see? If no one ever used that part of the lane, why build it in the first place -- but then the merge point is even yet further down. Either way, people have to slow to merge, but your vigilantism is both misguided and immoral.


[/minor victory]

8/3/2010 8:18:21 PM

Quote :

"there's nothing wrong with him going down the lane, passing others and merging later. That's what others should be doing."

it's wrong when they are speeding.

8/3/2010 8:49:08 PM

bwning a minor

8/3/2010 8:58:27 PM

Saying no to cereal in the morning and going to chikfila and getting a chicken breakfast burrito no onions, no peppers and a large half and half sweet tea. With salsa of course.

8/3/2010 9:14:36 PM

Speaking of fast food, when I get my chicken supremes dinner from bojangles and I check the box before driving away and see that they didn't give me my honey mustard sauce or my jelly and I tell those lazy bitch asses to rectify the situation.

8/4/2010 8:04:17 AM

Saying no to cereal in the morning and making my own sausage and egg breakfast burrito, with onions and peppers and a large glass of almond milk. With salsa of course.

8/4/2010 9:40:57 AM

Visibly impressing someone when playing Guitar Hero in public.

[Edited on August 4, 2010 at 9:45 AM. Reason : Post #46,868.]

8/4/2010 9:42:03 AM

^

8/4/2010 9:43:39 AM

I left my house and nothing awful happened to my car.

8/4/2010 9:46:25 AM

"No spelling errors found."

8/4/2010 9:51:38 AM

having to call someone to schedule a meeting, and having precisely zero idea how to pronounce their name.

getting sent directly to voicemail because their line is busy.

gathering the correct pronunciation from the greeting is a minor victory.

8/9/2010 10:56:28 AM

http://www.pronouncenames.com/

Don't be a sucker MC.

8/9/2010 11:03:19 AM

Quote :

"Seqwana The pronunciation of Seqwana is not known Would you like to submit the pronunciation of Seqwana? Would you like to request the pronunciation of Seqwana? "

8/9/2010 11:04:23 AM

New monitor that doesn't make me feel like seizing.

12/8/2010 12:43:30 PM

Quote :

"there's a long line of cars in a lane and a lane that is about to end on the right guy zooms past the line of cars to try to get in front, and you prevent the guy from getting over"

+1

My boss telling me to do something I've already done

12/8/2010 2:56:11 PM

Quote :

"My boss telling me to do something I've already done"

12/8/2010 3:08:06 PM

12/8/2010 3:32:18 PM

setting up a page

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

12/8/2010 3:34:36 PM