No shit, there was a Serbian or some other type of Eastern European terrorist and/or mafia hitman in the bar Saturday night.

he had a close cropped haircut and looked like he could have been a soldier. he was wearing an army green wool cap on his head and had an umbrella that he and his MILF-y "girlfriend" were studying intently while waiting on a beer. His girlfriend looked Russian. I think she might have been the political agent.

what really clued me into it, was when i realized that his umbrella was actually a rifle in disguise. I swear to god, the pointy end of it had a silencer barrel encased in it. And when he struck the handle of his umbrella on the floor of the bar, I distinctly heard the mechanism sound that he was actually chambering a round.

i knew at that moment, for sure he was going to shoot someone. I decided I would tackle him and disarm him of the umbrella. It would be my civic duty, right? How could i live with myself, after he killed people and I did nothing to stop it even though I knew??? My heart was beating and my palms started sweating, as you get when you know that violence is impending. he was not a small guy, and he looked in good shape. i would be in for a difficult fight.

then i thought it through... I decided it was the mushroom caps playing with my head, and i'd probably better just forget about it. because otherwise the cops would get involved, and there would likely be jail and maybe a mental evaluation in my near future.

but, still... I kept an eye on him for a while as i played pinball and nursed my PBR.





[Edited on October 25, 2010 at 7:46 PM. Reason : ]

10/25/2010 7:44:20 PM

cool story, bro.

10/25/2010 7:45:05 PM

haha I was about to say "cool story, bro" as well

10/25/2010 7:46:10 PM

Yo, holmes!

10/25/2010 8:14:01 PM

don't give me away

10/25/2010 9:47:18 PM

I realize this thread is about a terrorist in your bar....which I do not dispute. Hear me out, maybe I can offer some insight.

10/25/2010 9:49:26 PM

you have watched taken way too many times

10/25/2010 9:49:39 PM

come with joe_schmoe if you want to live?

10/25/2010 9:55:19 PM

I whistled for a cab
and told him my plan
but I thought nah forget it
Yo Holmes to Kaplan!

[Edited on October 25, 2010 at 10:31 PM. Reason : l]

10/25/2010 10:16:46 PM