it all began one uneventful afternoon when i started my shift as lead jizz mopper at the Lusty Lady.

1/26/2011 6:52:40 PM

this wont end well

1/26/2011 6:56:37 PM

it all began one uneventful afternoon when i started my shift as lead jizz mopper at the Lusty Lady.
I had just poured 1/2 gallon of bleach into my mop bucket, and wheeled it back to the champagne room. Upon opening the door, I heard a frantic scream exclaiming "EEUAAAHHHHH HEY, WE'RE NOT DONE YET!" My gaze shifted upwards only to see...

1/26/2011 7:01:10 PM

it all began one uneventful afternoon when i started my shift as lead jizz mopper at the Lusty Lady.
I had just poured 1/2 gallon of bleach into my mop bucket, and wheeled it back to the champagne room. Upon opening the door, I heard a frantic scream exclaiming "EEUAAAHHHHH HEY, WE'RE NOT DONE YET!" My gaze shifted upwards only to see...

Brandon1's gf refusing to walk for Relay for life, saying people suffer from cancer all the time, but I doubt they walk around titty bars.

1/26/2011 7:07:55 PM

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ i remember it well

1/26/2011 7:10:21 PM

somebody told me that
You had a boyfriend
Who looked like a girlfriend
That I had in February of last year
It's not confidential
I've got potential

Pace yourself for me
I said maybe baby please
But I just don't know now
When all I wanna do is try

1/26/2011 7:10:25 PM

it all began one uneventful afternoon when i started my shift as lead jizz mopper at the Lusty Lady.
I had just poured 1/2 gallon of bleach into my mop bucket, and wheeled it back to the champagne room. Upon opening the door, I heard a frantic scream exclaiming "EEUAAAHHHHH HEY, WE'RE NOT DONE YET!" My gaze shifted upwards only to see...

Brandon1's gf refusing to walk for Relay for life, saying people suffer from cancer all the time, but I doubt they walk around titty bars.

Even if they did, they weren't going to walk around in a jizz infested titty bar in this one horse town. Cancer patients are thrill seekers and flock to cities like marietta georgia, or des moines. they would never choose to waste any short remaining minutes sipping mai tai's at this bar. they don't have time to sleep and God knows....... this town sleeps.

1/26/2011 7:14:12 PM

for some reason i'm reading this in a deep, scratchy voice.. maybe Clint Eastwood..

1/26/2011 7:38:32 PM

^Mickey Rourke

1/26/2011 8:14:09 PM

I wrote my part in a Clint Eastwood voice, but I am not offended by mickey rourke.

1/26/2011 10:23:18 PM

I read it in a Frank Muller voice.

1/26/2011 10:30:37 PM

i wrote my part in Chuck Amato's voice

1/26/2011 10:31:58 PM

lets just make it slightly uncomfortable and read it in an Alan Rickman voice.

or Riff-Raff from rocky horror, they sort of sound the same

1/26/2011 10:33:19 PM

^^ ahahahahaha

1/26/2011 10:34:17 PM

Just read it in riff raff-anese. That was pretty funny. Good call

1/26/2011 10:35:13 PM

someone should keep the story going

and say whose voice its in

1/26/2011 10:36:57 PM

it all began one uneventful afternoon when i started my shift as lead jizz mopper at the Lusty Lady. I had just poured 1/2 gallon of bleach into my mop bucket, and wheeled it back to the champagne room. Upon opening the door, I heard a frantic scream exclaiming "EEUAAAHHHHH HEY, WE'RE NOT DONE YET!"

My gaze shifted upwards only to see... Brandon1's gf refusing to walk for Relay for life, saying people suffer from cancer all the time, but I doubt they walk around titty bars.

Even if they did, they weren't going to walk around in a jizz infested titty bar in this one horse town. Cancer patients are thrill seekers and flock to cities like marietta georgia, or des moines. they would never choose to waste any short remaining minutes sipping mai tai's at this bar. they don't have time to sleep and God knows....... this town sleeps.

The apprentice jizz mopper suggested that I accompany Brandon1's girlfriend to the Relay For Life. He was ready to be trained to mop jizz. I cautioned him that it was a dangerous job, fraught with perils that could lead him to the Dark Side. He continued to plead. I rebuffed him, saying:

“Ready are you? What know you of ready? For eight hundred years have I trained Jizz Mopper. My own counsel will I keep on who is to be trained. A Jizz Mopper must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away... to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph. Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jizz Mopper craves not these things. You are reckless.”

1/26/2011 10:55:05 PM

bump

1/30/2011 10:07:52 PM

nah,

i killed this thread with that last post.

1/31/2011 12:26:26 AM