a bidet! Omg my ass is so clean. And they're cheap! $30-70 for the non electric kind.

Also, my kindle. Now I can pack clothes on vacation instead of books.

6/8/2011 2:31:52 PM

6/8/2011 2:35:07 PM

posting

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 2:36 PM. Reason : .]

6/8/2011 2:36:14 PM

The Internet. And not just me. How did anyone live.

6/8/2011 2:38:03 PM

i hate to just throw out the obvious, but fucking cell phones.

how did people EVER meet anywhere w/o cell phones? i have no earthly idea.

6/8/2011 2:38:52 PM

^, ^^

6/8/2011 2:41:01 PM

a bidet for $30?

how exactly did you install it?

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 2:48 PM. Reason : .]

6/8/2011 2:48:15 PM

its one of those that attach to the toilet with just a cold water hookup to the toilet water line. Nothing fancy. I already ordered one that hooks up to warm and cold water altho its $70.

http://www.amazon.com/Joy-Non-Electric-Bidet-Attachment-Introductory/dp/B00442UK14/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1307559042&sr=8-9

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 2:50 PM. Reason : link]

6/8/2011 2:49:53 PM

Contact Lenses

6/8/2011 2:50:12 PM

Quote :

"a bidet for $30?"

6/8/2011 2:58:23 PM

I use my Waterpik as a bidet. No complaints.

6/8/2011 3:03:11 PM

i wouldn't want a bidet that sits over the bowl, don't feel like peeing on something that is about to spray me. having a separate bidet works though.

6/8/2011 3:04:59 PM

Peter

awwwww

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 3:06 PM. Reason : or maybe I just do a winky face I love his name]

6/8/2011 3:05:18 PM

Anybody who wipes their ass is a filthy mofo.

I have washed my ass [after defecating] with running water since the beginning. So does everybody else in nearly all Asian and Arab countries. That's like, 2-3 billion people. And for the last 15 years, with soap as well.

Never understood how the West moved away from washing themselves with water after defecating. Serious question: When did it happen? (I am assuming people used to wash themselves, but some time ago, maybe a century or three, everybody switched to dry wiping)

Do you really think wiping removes all the fecal matter, bacteria, and smell?

One of my friends as an undergrad who used to live in another dorm stayed over in my room one night. He asked for boxers, so I gave him a clean pair. He woke up in the morning and left before I got up. I sniffed the boxers and they smelled of shit, from like 3-4 inches away.

That means everybody's underwear smells of shit, most of the day. And if underwear does, so does the seat of the pants. Doesn't that bother anybody, even though you can't smell your own shit smell? Just the fact that there is ample quantities of fecal matter? Bothers no one?

There have been times when I have worn the same underwear for many days in a row (except when sleeping, duh) due to certain circumstances, and you know what, there is still no whiff of shit smell after a week.

6/8/2011 3:12:02 PM

This is America. We wipe our asses with pride. Shut the fuck up and never come back.

6/8/2011 3:13:02 PM

And you smelled a grown man's dirty underwear

6/8/2011 3:14:07 PM

Quote :

"I have washed my ass [after defecating] with running water since the beginning. So does everybody else in nearly all Asian and Arab countries."

False. In much of Asia they wipe their ass with their bare left hand and wash it afterwards. This is why the left hand is considered unclean in those parts of the world.

Quote :

"One of my friends as an undergrad who used to live in another dorm stayed over in my room one night. He asked for boxers, so I gave him a clean pair. He woke up in the morning and left before I got up. I sniffed the boxers"

What is wrong with you?

6/8/2011 3:15:25 PM

Quote :

"i wouldn't want a bidet that sits over the bowl, don't feel like peeing on something that is about to spray me. having a separate bidet works though. "

You don't pee on it-- it sits at the back of the toilet and shoot water up at an angle, so if you're a girl and you're peeing, you're probably sitting down and urine is going down or towards the front of the bowl. If you're a guy and peeing standing up, then you can't use the bidet anyways.

Also, its spring loaded so it retracts when its not in use.

6/8/2011 3:17:14 PM

What I use can be seen in the pic below. Used a bidet for the first 10 years or so of my life, then those sprays came here. You will find one in every single toilet in the whole country, and in several neighboring countries.

Interestingly enough, 99% of those sprays are made in Finland, Norway, Italy, or the US. Have those countries realized there is major bucks to be made by making them for Muslim countries? Or are they used in the kitchen sink?

Anyway, what's interesting is that many Westerners working and living here that I have spoken to love it, and they bought a few before leaving from here for good, so they could install them in their homes in the UK/US.

I mean, duh, who wouldn't like a clean ass, all day, every day? That's like, ummm, human nature.(and fresh smelling if you use soap like I do)

6/8/2011 3:18:01 PM

^that seems awkward to use. Do you stand up and use it?

6/8/2011 3:20:12 PM

I'm willing to bet anyone on here 1000 USD that my asshole is cleaner than their's

Mr. Joshua has kindly agreed to be the arbiter of these proceedings.

6/8/2011 3:22:29 PM

I would just assume that's used to ward off anyone who tries to come in while you're taking a dump.

6/8/2011 3:23:00 PM

I was watching house hunters international and couple made fun of the house that had those installed and everyone on the show was like "what kind of idiot would use that"

Quote :

"So does everybody else in nearly all Asian and Arab countries. That's like, 2-3 billion people"

Shutup they don't have running water.

6/8/2011 3:27:11 PM

Quote :

"False. In much of Asia they wipe their ass with their bare left hand and wash it afterwards. This is why the left hand is considered unclean in those parts of the world."

Sorry dude, you know a lot about stuff, but not here. Did you see anybody using their hand to wipe shit? In South Asia (India, Pak, Bangla, etc), they use the thing below:



While they pour water on their nether regions with the right hand, they use their left to wash away the fecal water. So, it is still with water. And they might have to fill it up a couple of times to be completely clean. It holds like a liter of water, and that's more than enough to clean away everything from down there. And if they have access to soap, they will wash their hands with soap.

Of course, that happens in places where they don't have access to 'fancy' (i.e., normal) plumbing, which unfortunately is true for majority of the population in those countries. In the big cities though, they have modern stuff, like bidets, the spray that I use, etc.

Quote :

"This is America. We wipe our asses with pride. Shut the fuck up and never come back."

STFU you coward. You keep on wiping your ass, and I will come to visit my alma maters in the US when I want to. Go ahead, contact DHS and tell them someone who washes their ass i.e., a terrorist, is planning to come to the US.

And why did I sniff the boxers? Well, they were mine, so I can sniff my clothes whenever I want, even if someone else wore them. But mainly, I kept on hearing that people have clean asses even though they only wipe, so I wanted to test that. Yeah, sample size of one blah blah blah... shoot me.

Quote :

"^that seems awkward to use. Do you stand up and use it?"

Stand up and use it so that all the bounced-off water goes all over the bathroom?

You do a dump, you get the spray which has a spring-loaded trigger on it (as can be seen in the pic), and spray your anal area. Adjust the water pressure by fully pressing on the trigger or partially, manoever it with your hand to any area as needed. All the water falls into the toilet. Put it back on. Grab some toilet paper and dry yourself throughly.

Not only does it feel great WHILE you use it (like a water jet massage), but you feel great once you put your clothes back on and walk out... I always walk with pride and a sprinf in my step once I leave the bathroom at work (I try as much as possible not to do a dump at work, but sometimes you just have to), knowing that my ass is clean.

Quote :

"Shutup they don't have running water."

Ignoramus. And people who don't, use the container above.

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 3:43 PM. Reason : ]

6/8/2011 3:34:44 PM

Quote :

"While they pour water on their nether regions with the right hand, they use their left to wash away the fecal water."

Water or not, the bare left hand is being used to clean the anus, which is my point.

6/8/2011 3:39:55 PM

Quote :

"I was watching house hunters international and couple made fun of the house that had those installed and everyone on the show was like "what kind of idiot would use that""

Any idiot who doesn't want shit on their body.

If you like shit, that's your business.

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 3:50 PM. Reason : ]

6/8/2011 3:44:32 PM

YO

MY NAME IS OPPIE1

I TRIED TO TEACH MY DAUGHTER 18 LANGUAGES WHILE SHE WAS IN THE WOMB

I PUT FUCKING PRUNES IN MY CHOCOLATE CAKE

AND I SNIFF GROWN MEN'S UNDERWEAR

LOOK AT ME

I'M A FUCKING GLOBAL CITIZEN

6/8/2011 3:45:23 PM

I love shit

6/8/2011 3:45:32 PM

Quote :

"Water or not, the bare left hand is being used to clean the anus, which is my point."

That's how they did it thousands of years ago as well, on the banks of streams, rivers, and lakes, by using their hands while squatting in a body of water. These days, those without access to running water or those hand-held sprays/bidets use those containers. You can't blame them for it.

craptastic, well well well... username says it all.

And this ain't chit chit.

6/8/2011 3:49:51 PM

sylvershadow, how is the water pressure? I've never used a bidet... i usually hop in the shower right after instead. is it a trickle or a full out torrent?

6/8/2011 3:59:21 PM

the one I got is pretty strong-- its supposed to have settings, but I have to crank it up pretty high for the spring mechanism to release the nozzle. It's also probably going to be based on what kind of water pressure you have in your house, though it comes through a narrow tube so the pressure probably is increased from that.

6/8/2011 4:10:26 PM

O K enough with the clean anus talk. make a bidet thread if there's that much discussion

back on topic, how did I ever live without:


or just computers in general

6/8/2011 4:22:41 PM

If I take a particularly nasty dump I'll moisten some TP and wipe (if I'm not at home) or just take a quick shower after (at home)

But for a normal healthy dump just a few wipes with TP is all you need, if you smell like ass after that you just didn't wipe properly.


And just because your roommate doesn't wipe properly doesn't mean "everybody's underwear smells of shit." Did you take any statistics classes per chance?

6/8/2011 4:32:27 PM

I use toilet wipes when I take a dump. Even if I use TP to wipe until I get nothing on it any more, I can take a toilet wipe and it will still show some stuff that the TP missed.

6/8/2011 4:54:36 PM

Quote :

"One of my friends as an undergrad who used to live in another dorm stayed over in my room one night. He asked for boxers, so I gave him a clean pair. He woke up in the morning and left before I got up. I sniffed the boxers and they smelled of shit, from like 3-4 inches away."

What the hell possessed you to smell someone else's boxers??

6/8/2011 5:01:17 PM

^ everything has been answered, genius, read the thread.

Quote :

"But for a normal healthy dump just a few wipes with TP is all you need, if you smell like ass after that you just didn't wipe properly."

so you are claiming it is possible to completely eradicate fecal matter and SMELL from a semi-permeable surface with dry toilet paper? what world are you living in?

see this, from the post below yours:

Quote :

"Even if I use TP to wipe until I get nothing on it any more, I can take a toilet wipe and it will still show some stuff that the TP missed."

****************************************************************

O K enough with the clean anus talk.

How did I ever live without...

cell phone
computers
internet
car


[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 5:20 PM. Reason : ]

6/8/2011 5:16:22 PM

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 5:20 PM. Reason : ]

6/8/2011 5:19:00 PM

Are YOU claiming it's possible to "completely eradicate fecal matter and SMELL" with just plain water and no soap?

Keep in mind the word "Completely"

6/8/2011 5:21:19 PM

no, it is not, but it is all relative:

on a scale of 1-10: (with 1 being the cleanest)

with tp: 8-10
with h20: 2-3
with h20 + soap: 1

and use soap if you really want to be clean, i sure do.

6/8/2011 5:32:48 PM

Incredibly shitty thread.

6/8/2011 5:45:16 PM

Quote :

"That's how they did it thousands of years ago as well, on the banks of streams, rivers, and lakes, by using their hands while squatting in a body of water. These days, those without access to running water or those hand-held sprays/bidets use those containers. You can't blame them for it."

No, I can't blame them at all. However, to claim that cleaning with water is better because a large portion of mankind do so is disingenuous. For many of those people it's not a choice. They have neither running water or access to toilet paper so they clean their anus with with water and a bare hand and then decide that it's really rude if you pass the rice with your left hand at dinner.

Personally, I think toilets with built in bidets are amazing. When I was last in Tokyo my hotel room had one of those sweet Toto rigs with the control panel. I sat down to pee every time just so I could get my anus sprayed and refreshed.

6/8/2011 5:47:27 PM

Quote :

"One of my friends as an undergrad who used to live in another dorm stayed over in my room one night. He asked for boxers, so I gave him a clean pair. He woke up in the morning and left before I got up. I sniffed the boxers and they smelled of shit, from like 3-4 inches away."

What the fuck, dude? What thought could possibly be going through your head before you sniffed those boxers besides "word... these need to go in the washing machine whether they're smelly or not" ?

6/8/2011 5:51:20 PM

Quote :

"However, to claim that cleaning with water is better because a large portion of mankind do so is disingenuous. For many of those people it's not a choice. They have neither running water or access to toilet paper so they clean their anus with with water and a bare hand"

Well then my question is, the West sure has the technology/money to install devices into every home, what's stopping them? Because when people in those Asian and Arab countries do have access to modern plumbing and TP, they still go with cleaning with water, this time without manual involvement. So why not the West? Do people just want to have a fecal-film on their anal region most of the day? (i.e., are they are not bothered by it, especially when it is so easy to remove it by installing some one-off equipment?)

I am saying cleaning with water is always better than cleaning without, regardless of who and how many people do it. That's not something that can be argued with, most definitely not when the matter to be cleaned is shit, and the surface is the human body.

6/8/2011 6:02:02 PM

how do you have enough room to maneuver that under your ass without leaning forward any.

eww and think about how nasty that sprayer is in a public bathroom, i wouldn't want to put my hand on it

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 6:07 PM. Reason : .]

6/8/2011 6:07:06 PM

1) aside from a handful of cheap attachments, the majority of toilets with built in bidet functions of too costly for builders to make them standard in new construction
2) while popular in asia, few americans are exposed to them. ones who do use them in asia likely consider them a purely asian novelty and don't consider home installation when they get home
3) westerners have been using TP of some sort for centuries; asking them to drop that tradition in favor of something wholly new (better or worse) is quite a step
4) the cost of expensive retrofit would be considered by many to be foolhardy, as we will all transition to the three seashells system at some point between now and 2032.

6/8/2011 6:08:18 PM

Opie is a nasty muthafucka. Letting another dude borrow a pair of your boxers is bad enough. THEN you put his used boxers to your nose so you can smell them??? You are a fucking wacko.

6/8/2011 6:14:41 PM

^^^ yeah you lean your upper body forward, but still sitting fully on the seat. as for the sprayer in public toilets, yeah that's one of the reasons i don't like to use toilets at work. there is nothing visible with the naked eye on them, but i don't like touching them. thankfully, however, i have found some remote toilets at work which hardly anybody uses, so i go there in the rare case i do a dump at work.

^^ the sprayer costs like $5 for the cheapest models (plastic), and $20 for the most expensive ones, which are chrome/gold colored metallic ones.

Quote :

"3) westerners have been using TP of some sort for centuries"

i am quite interested in that from a historical/anthropological/philosophical point of view: did people in the west ever use water to clean themselves? like, within the last 1-2 millenia. if so, when and where, and how/why did it phase out.

hygiene is one of my pet topics, from an academic point of view (but i am not one of those walking around with the gel in hand; i am quite opposed to that). i should have done a phd to explore the questions in the para above, and other such similar topics.

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 6:22 PM. Reason : ^ you have shit on you, literally... you are the nasty one.]

[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 6:23 PM. Reason : a friend borrowing your boxers is bad? wtf? they were shorts actually, but even if boxers, so what?]

6/8/2011 6:21:02 PM

1. I'm going to strike a happy medium and say wet wipes. Not only are they great for wiping your butt and cleaning your genitals. They're awesome for just about every other body part that needs a quick clean up.

2. My Kindle. I've become quite spoiled.

6/8/2011 6:21:32 PM

Quote :

"yeah you lean your upper body forward, but still sitting fully on the seat"

if i lean forward i'm gonna be dipping my tip into the water, so... no thanks

6/8/2011 6:25:51 PM

^^^ you have NO idea what my bathroom habits are. You on the other hand put a pair of shit stained boxers to your nose. You are one fucking DISGUSTING person. I don't care if you powerwash your asshole with bleach.



[Edited on June 8, 2011 at 6:27 PM. Reason : ^]

6/8/2011 6:26:16 PM