So during the summer I've picked up a little side job at a local little coffee shop down here....

This old guy comes in with really creepy white hair and long handlebar mustache. He is about 60 years old, single, makes comments about sexting and meeting women on Match.com.

Lately he's started telling the other baristas that he wants to spank me.........

I really want to tell this guy that he's a creep- BUT TODAY HE WALKS IN WEARING A T SHIRT THAT SAYS "CREEPER"!! And he LOVES to be CALLED "Creeper"!!!

Ugh...I don't know how to tell this guy that he needs to go throw himself off a bridge- I've told him he's inappropriate...but he has this weird sketchy laugh and sense of humor. He mistakes it as positive attention and possibly even flirting....

I've made a few coffee cups for him that say "They call me the creeper for all the wrong reasons"....so I'm going to give him that next time he comes in....but I want some ideas as to what I can do to this guy to really put him in his place. He's a real womanizer so I don't want him to mistake anything as giving him "attention"....


Thoughts?

Words.

I know.

Help.

7/11/2011 1:01:21 PM

They call me the Creeper
I've been searching low and high
I won't get to get what I'm after
'Til the day I die

7/11/2011 1:02:43 PM

Just let him spank you. He'll probably leave you alone after that.

7/11/2011 1:03:35 PM

seriously

let him in the saddle, so to speak

7/11/2011 1:04:21 PM

Big4Country is back from the future for real



[Edited on July 11, 2011 at 1:06 PM. Reason : lkj]

7/11/2011 1:05:38 PM

1. If you're writing on the cup he's going to take it as attention. Dude sounds like not a single fuck is being given any day. This reminds me of a friend, and his attention is merely diverted elsewhere. An explicit letter probably wouldn't work, I feel for you.
2. I really want to listen to the Seeker so it doesn't get messed up in my head right now.
.
.
.
Hide yo wife.

7/11/2011 1:07:27 PM

If you're not going to contribute to this thread, then you should probably evaluate how many women YOU alienate...

7/11/2011 1:09:11 PM

^^Time, You're probably completely right.

7/11/2011 1:10:03 PM

Tell him to fuck off. Personal security > customer service

I'm AstralAdvent and I approved this message

7/11/2011 1:11:12 PM

you get someone to address the issue, and if he doesnt cease to be a problem you ask him to leave and you tresspass him the next time he enters the establishment


this shit is real fucking simple. you dont need to make threads for common sense issues, this is why people get killed and raped leaving work, they wait too long and dont fucking nip shit in the bud

just address the issue, if he continues the behavior then let him know his business is no longer welcome (or have the person in charge of the business do this)

7/11/2011 1:11:31 PM

You're going to get raped guy in puffy coat



[Edited on July 11, 2011 at 1:13 PM. Reason : .]

7/11/2011 1:12:01 PM

im sure you are using it as an ego stroke whatever but when this dude drags you out and rapes you and slits your throat you might live to regret your inaction

i will never have my daughter grow up to be so stupid.

[Edited on July 11, 2011 at 1:13 PM. Reason : e]

7/11/2011 1:13:06 PM

When I was 16, I got my first job dealing with the general public at the Barnes and Noble cafe. I'm sure we had all sorts of creepsters there, but there's only one I really remember.

This African guy started coming in, talking about how he recently moved to America, blah blah. Seemed like a nice enough guy. Then one day he came it, declared he wanted to marry me, and that he was going to wait in the front of the store until I was off my shift to take me home Needless to say I told my manager what was happening and exited out the rear loading entrance that day lol. I don't remember him coming back in again so maybe they banned him from the store.

7/11/2011 1:15:39 PM

giving him a special cup = you thinking about him.

Is there a reason that you can't simply tell him to leave? Last time I checked, sexual harassment is illegal so tell him to gtfo and find a new coffee shop.

7/11/2011 1:16:12 PM

Maybe... maybe, pay more attention to other men, and deal with him in as much of a robotic fashion as possible.

7/11/2011 1:18:15 PM

epic truths itt

7/11/2011 1:18:44 PM

Quote :

"Maybe... maybe, pay more attention to other men, and deal with him in as much of a robotic fashion as possible. "

This is the 2nd best option if the manager or the owner of the coffee shop won't recognize that this customer causes a hostile work environment and won't deal with him personally.

7/11/2011 1:19:46 PM

thats a fuckin stupid option because the guys feelign will most likely intensify


are you serious?

7/11/2011 1:20:26 PM

I would devise elaborate mindgames with him till he losses it?

[Edited on July 11, 2011 at 1:21 PM. Reason : .]

7/11/2011 1:20:53 PM

actually i dont think shes goin to do anything about it and i dont particularly care about her so what the hell, DJ try number two.

lets see what happens.

7/11/2011 1:21:51 PM

Why would it cause his feelings to intensify if you're basically ignoring him outside of fulfilling your basic work duties?

Then again I'm not crazy so I don't know how crazy people operate

7/11/2011 1:22:18 PM

Well, y'all are raising good points here.

I am a pretty mild mannered person. I consider myself quick witted when it comes to joking around and cracking jokes- that's my knee jerk reaction. However, in this case, I feel kind of like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill and second guessing my reactions. This is totally the kind of guy who would figure out what car I drive and follow me around. I live on an island in S. Texas currently and there are only about 5,000 people on the island. It's about the size of Meredith College. As I think about it, there could be more of a safety issue at stake than originally recognized- but it's all such a big "WHAT IF" that I've been able to look past that aspect. Y'know? Kind of like YEAH- a meteor could hit us today...it's happened before...and there's nothing keeping it from hitting us- BUT C'MON meteors never hit!

So...I reckon something really does need to be done....but on the OTHER hand...this guy probably is a complete loner. He gets no attention from women ever, and just like any behavior student- bad attention is just as good as positive attention.

So I think I'm going to have to suck up the adrenaline rush that makes me shake when I see this guy and 'nip it in the bud." I don't want to be a dumb girl.

7/11/2011 1:22:55 PM

because you are visibly showing predispostion to other men


if hes some sort of dude with problems, thats a bad thing to do.

7/11/2011 1:23:39 PM

I bet he never tips the requisite 20%+.

7/11/2011 1:25:46 PM

Mindgames drive all men crazy btw don't do it

[Edited on July 11, 2011 at 1:26 PM. Reason : .]

7/11/2011 1:25:55 PM

Seriously, have your manager bounce this guy.

7/11/2011 1:29:09 PM

you should totally add him on facebook

7/11/2011 1:29:35 PM

I'm with bighitsunday on every single thing he has said in this thread.

7/11/2011 1:30:06 PM

If you are worried about second guessing you could just plainly state that he makes you uncomfortable with his actions. I realize this sounds lame, and I honestly probably wouldn't do it myself, but it would certainly make things clear. Then when you call the police you don't have to feel bad.
I bet that Creeper shirt was a gift from another girl who works with the public.

7/11/2011 1:30:12 PM

he probably beats off in them cups too

7/11/2011 1:31:12 PM

your best bet is to throw cold water in his face
it isn't hot, so it isn't assault
it also contains no allergens, so not assault
while doing that, call dude something non-profane and non-creeper...like lowlife scum or something...you're at work so you have to be careful, he may have the gumption to get you fired if you don't play this right.

7/11/2011 1:33:45 PM

XSMP said:

Quote :

"it isn't hot, so it isn't assault"

siren.gif

7/11/2011 1:34:36 PM

actually throwing drinks is assault

7/11/2011 1:34:46 PM

water is not assault when you are responding to sexual harassment.
I thought this was common knowledge.

7/11/2011 1:36:45 PM

true in my opinion

but who the hell knows what someone might have seen vs how it gets reported to the cops

gotta keep clean

7/11/2011 1:38:48 PM

Some people get hives from cold water.

7/11/2011 1:38:50 PM

I figure the strapping RPD will see a cute skinny hipster chick + creepy old white haired dude and draw their own conclusions, trust me they would laugh in anyone's face that tried pressing assault charges.

7/11/2011 1:40:56 PM

i do not disagree with that

7/11/2011 1:44:11 PM

sound to me like if we make it luke-warm water, we have a deal!

7/11/2011 1:45:25 PM

Quote :

"I figure the strapping RPD will see a cute skinny hipster chick + creepy old white haired dude and draw their own conclusions, trust me they would laugh in anyone's face that tried pressing assault charges."

Except she's in Texas. Who knows how they do in Texas

7/11/2011 1:50:44 PM

If the guy was a mexican it would be an open and shut case

7/11/2011 1:52:34 PM

I moonlight @ a bar and these people showed up




(sorry yall... had to be done )

7/11/2011 1:54:05 PM

First thing you need to do is report this to your manager. He needs to hear from you first, pre-emptively, instead of having the creeper complain about you because he is a nutjob.

7/11/2011 2:03:30 PM

ThePeter won this thread on post 5.

7/11/2011 2:25:47 PM

iop1.
Please, let us know what happens?
And what coffee shop is this?

7/11/2011 3:01:47 PM

I think you should give him a cup that says:

I :heart: creepers

7/11/2011 3:14:28 PM

Quote :

"So...I reckon something really does need to be done....but on the OTHER hand...this guy probably is a complete loner. He gets no attention from women ever, and just like any behavior student- bad attention is just as good as positive attention. "

I saw the word "womanizer" used in this thread, and I was like [no]. If I understand the term at all, a womanizer makes you feel both kind of flattered and insulted at the same time.

But really, the advice about flirting with other men to get rid of him probably isn't a good idea either. It's tough, but reality is that you might have to pull out the big guns - meaning be honest with him.

Quote :

"Lately he's started telling the other baristas that he wants to spank me"

It's hard to argue with actions like this. So take the most objective and undeniable example you have of his inappropriate behavior and say it straight to his face that it's inappropriate and that he has to cut it out. Then continue to do your job.

Generally, most women I know would take it up with the manager, have someone else talk to him, and demand that she no longer have to serve the guy. But that's assuming an urban place. You're in the country with deaf managers and few options. And yeah, working in food service sucks.

7/11/2011 3:19:19 PM

Quote :

"working in food service sucks."

[/thread]

7/11/2011 3:37:55 PM

Say:

DUDE..! You're fucking disgusting...

If he misinterprets that..then tell him you have aids

7/11/2011 5:24:14 PM

Quote :

"I am a pretty mild mannered person. I consider myself quick witted when it comes to joking around and cracking jokes- that's my knee jerk reaction. However, in this case, I feel kind of like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill and second guessing my reactions. This is totally the kind of guy who would figure out what car I drive and follow me around. I live on an island in S. Texas currently and there are only about 5,000 people on the island. It's about the size of Meredith College. As I think about it, there could be more of a safety issue at stake than originally recognized- but it's all such a big "WHAT IF" that I've been able to look past that aspect. Y'know? Kind of like YEAH- a meteor could hit us today...it's happened before...and there's nothing keeping it from hitting us- BUT C'MON meteors never hit! "

blah blah blah, I see all I need to know. Get your concealed carry, buy a gun (you don't have to spend a lot) and pack heat.

If he ends up becoming an issue, you can defend yourself.

Sell the gun when you move or take it with you when you leave.

7/11/2011 5:24:25 PM