Hey guys,

Today I'm announcing my candidacy for the 2012 Presidential Election for the Republicrat party. I don't believe in choosing sides, but rather trying to make everyone happy.

Just some bullet points on my positions:

-Lower taxes! This is a must to stimulate the economy
-Free Healthcare for all! Don't worry, it's not mandated it's just provided, like I95.
-$2.49/gallon gas! I have a 3 point plan.
-Increase the social safety net! Poor people hurt the economy.
-Decrease our debt
-More wars! The only way to get more countries to take us seriously is to threaten them.
-More Jobs! Our current president isn't doing anything to return jobs to the wolf web. I will!
-Help the middle class! There has been a war on it since 1876. It's time to end it and sign the peace treaty.
-Expand border protection! AMERICA
-Let illegal immigrants stay but not give them citizenship. We'll mildly go after businesses who hire illegal immigrants. Enough to satisfy everyone.
-Homosexual marriage, except we won't call it marriage, we'll call it gayrage. It's like marriage, but it's for gay people. And we'll make it cool with cool advertisements and stuff. Maybe like a band or something. Only gay people can do it! THAT'S RIGHT, NO STRAIGHT PEOPLE CAN PARTICIPATE! TAKE THAT YOU HETERO HOMOPHOBES!
-Decrease the power of the executive branch.
-More executive orders.
-Keep America safe with more protection. It's unAmerican if you want to see terrorists win!
-Legalize marijuana.
-%100 tax on marijuana. Maybe only make it available to people who are gayraged.
-Decreased spending.
-Government subsidized college education.
-Better medicare.
-Removal of medicaid while integrating it with medicare.

Feel free to ask me questions.

merbig 2012!

3/17/2012 1:54:24 PM

I want a job in the state department

3/17/2012 2:00:15 PM

what exactly is considered the state department

3/17/2012 2:03:06 PM

notfunny.jpg

3/17/2012 2:03:42 PM

Quote :

"-More Jobs! Our current president isn't doing anything to return jobs to the wolf web. I will!"

This is true.

3/17/2012 2:03:45 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Department_of_State

3/17/2012 2:05:20 PM

so when I hear "state department" they do actually mean "department of state"

wasn't sure if it just meant any federal jerb lol

3/17/2012 2:12:11 PM

[yes]

3/17/2012 2:13:57 PM

Chit Chat doesn't care, soap box might.

3/17/2012 2:16:31 PM

the time out of your life spent typing that was not worth the miniscule amount of humor presented

should have done a cost-benefit analysis

3/17/2012 2:22:13 PM

I'd rather vote for santorum

3/17/2012 2:25:20 PM

I'm in my twenties and I've never voted but I will argue on youtube in your favor. I care about the issues

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

3/17/2012 2:32:35 PM

Thank you guys for your support! I really think I have a shot. You can find me in the national republicrat caucus on April 15th.

3/17/2012 3:33:34 PM

i'm announcing my konydacy for march

3/17/2012 3:40:14 PM

I'm sorry to inform the public that Merbig is dropping out of the race due to Article II, Section 1, Clause 5 of the United States Constitution.

3/17/2012 4:15:46 PM

it would be cool to be elected president in your 20's, you'd pull mad pussy

3/17/2012 4:59:34 PM